I can’t believe summer is already coming to a close. I know so many people who get their life from fall’s outfits, seasonal drinks, and pleasant change of weather. But for me, it’s the quiet the season brings that I enjoy most. It’s when you’ll see me start to change up my recipes and spend more nights in – complete with an anticipated fall TV lineup. And there’s so many shows I’m looking forward to this season, but one I’m particularly excited about is Reasonable Doubt on Hulu.
Produced by the incomparable Kerry Washington, the story follows the layered character Jax Stewart (Emayatzy Corinealdi), who is a brilliant defense attorney with a not-so-brilliant personal life. Last season, the series delved into heavy topics like sexual abuse, mental health, and more while still maintaining the feeling of a fun drama thriller that can spark a lot of interesting convo. Not to mention, it’s sexy.
The cast was filled with eye-candy like McKinley Freeman, Michael Ealy, and Sean Patrick Thomas (Morris Chestnut was added to season two), and a few love scenes that will make you clutch your pearls. xoNecole had the opportunity to chat with the show’s leading lady, Emayatzy Corinealdi, about what we can expect in season two and how she balances keeping her joyful spirit and body-goals physique.
McKinley Freeman, Emayatzy Corinealdi, and Morris Chestnut
Photo by Robin L Marshall/Getty Images for ESSENCE
xoNecole: First, I have to say I’m a fan of the show and your story. I know how you moved to LA 20 years ago to chase this dream, and that world can be so tough while navigating life and motherhood. So, my first question is, how do you balance it all and maintain your well-being?
Emayatz Corinealdi: Girl, it’s just my faith. It helps me by realizing that I'm not perfect. I can't do it all. I realize it’s okay to make mistakes. Giving myself that grace really helps because I used to feel like I have to keep all of the balls in the air and everything has to be one particular way. Now, I’ve learned that I’m almost dishonoring my faith by believing that everything starts and ends with me, and I can just do the whole thing. I can't - well, I can't without letting it go and letting God. That’s really the key.
xoN: So let’s get into the show. What was it like playing a character that is inspired by a real person (Attorney Shawn Holley from the OJ Simpson trial)?
EM: I've only played an actual person in another film. But this isn't truly her, this is just inspired by Shawn Holley. But at the same time, I still want to represent because she is one of the baddest to ever do it. I have so much respect for her and she’s also an executive producer of the show. I want to make sure that I represent not only her, but all the Black women who are attorneys and work in this field. So in that sense, yes, it's always in the back of my mind.
xoN: Okay, so you know, here at xoNecole, we talk a lot about love and relationships. And Jax was in a very interesting love triangle. But it seems like, ultimately, she chose her safe place. I'm curious, personally, what's your thoughts on passion versus security in relationships?
EM: I really think you could have both. I don't think you need to make a choice in that. Ideally, you want to have a relationship where you’re interested and invested - not just settling for the security of things. That’s the route I suggest - not settling. But people have all kinds of reasons why they do things, so I'm never judging.
Ideally, you want to have a relationship where you’re interested and invested - not just settling for the security of things. That’s the route I suggest - not settling. But people have all kinds of reasons why they do things, so I'm never judging.
xoN: Now, can we talk about one of our favorite MCMs over 40, Morris Chestnut? I heard he’s joining the new season. Can you tell us a little about how your characters will interact?
EM: Well, where we left off on season one, Jax had this traumatic experience, with Damon's character. So now, Jax is trying to pick up the pieces because everything is in a state of disarray. She’s trying to find herself again. She feels like, ‘How did I not see this coming? I'm usually on it. I'm sharp. Why did I allow myself to get into this situation, you know?’
So she's asking all these questions when her friend needs her. But then, probably for the first time, Jax realizes she may not be fully able to do what she needs to. So she reaches out to who can get the job done. And that's where Corey comes in, played by Morris Chestnut.
xoN: Speaking of Jax, I don’t know how she has time but that woman is always running. But obviously, to keep that physique, you must personally have a strict exercise regimen too. Can you share a health and fitness tip for the girlies?
EM: Yes, Jax runs, and she's in shape. But I love to run as well! That was one of my favorite things about the character. There’s a huge hill by my house, and I run it about three or four times a week when I’m able – otherwise, it's one or two. But that's a large part of my mental health as well, just feeling good in my body and keeping that going. And I generally like to work out outside. I'll even take my weights and mats. I don't really like gyms, but outdoor workouts help me keep it together.
xoN: You mentioned mental health, last season touched on so many necessary conversations. Themes like abuse and mental health were addressed. Are there any other heavy themes being explored this season that we should prepare for?
EM: Definitely. Domestic violence is going to be a huge theme. Dealing with Janelle’s character, we're going to find out a lot more details about their marriage and how things played out, and what she was really going through.
xoN: Wow, that can be taxing. I’ll close with this: how do you protect your mental health? Would you mind sharing a key practice?
EM: I generally start every day with a devotional. That helps me set the tone for the day… Outside of that, I just center myself multiple times. Instead of allowing things to get me stressed out, I recoup and take moments back. I’ve found that to be helpful, especially when a lot of things are happening. Nothing will fall apart while you take that one second. And if it does, that's okay. I recommend just giving yourself grace.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image by Amanda Edwards/Getty Images for SAG-AFTRA Foundation
RELATED
When I asked a few women I know if they ever tried that before, I was surprised to discover that not only had they, but many didn’t treat it as some random social media fad — they actually still do it to this day. Partly, because it’s fun to them and partly because their partner(s) seem to go crazy for it.
Listen, any time something sexual works like a charm, I’m going to shout it out — (late) trend or not. And so, if you’ve never heard of the whole coconut thing, you tried it and forgot all about it, or you just want to try something new/different/else tonight — here’s a reminder, in article form, that coconut-ting is still alive and well, y’all. And the men are all about it!
But First, The Grapefruit Technique
Video Credit: Myem/YouTube (Funny part starts at 2:40)
If this woman is not familiar to you on sight, you ain’t a real one. LOL. Although I know that a lot of people think that the concept of grapefruiting came from the movie Girls Trip (you can see the clip from the film here) that absolutely is not the case. Auntie Angel (whose real name is reportedly Denise Walker) is the creator of the Grapefruit Technique and although I thought that this video came out way earlier, apparently it made its way onto the YouTube streets sometime back in 2014.
If for some reason, you’re not familiar with grapefruiting on any level, I will tell you right now that I had to download this video because it is absolutely NSFW — so you should probably watch it on your lunch break (on your phone with the volume as low as possible) or at home…because chile, the sound effects? Whew, the sound effects. LOL. However, when I sat down to pen this piece, I thought it was hilarious that this video is what immediately came to mind because it seems like, when it comes to “blow his mind sex hacks,” fruit is constantly on the menu.
When it comes to oral sex, it’s grapefruit.
When it comes to ride ‘em cowgirl, it’s a coconut.
What Is the “Coconut” Sex Trend?
@windy_moraba #duet with @mysteri0us.gir1 spell coconut with your waist 😂😂😂
Okay, so what in the world does a coconut have to do with intercourse? Well, for starters, if you and your partner are looking for an all-natural lubricant, coconut oil works well. HOWEVER, do keep in mind that the disclaimer on this is you shouldn’t use it if condoms are in the mix because they can actually cause rubbers to be less effective (silicone lube is a solid bet for condoms, by the way).
There is another way that coconuts are kinda-sorta incorporated when it comes to making sex more pleasurable — and it actually became pretty popular right after COVID lockdown (2021): spelling C-O-C-O-N-U-T with your hips while you’re on top of your partner.
It’s wild how I forgot all about this until a client of mine was telling me how much her husband liked her on top while it wasn’t her favorite thing to do because it felt awkward to her. When I said, “Have you ever heard of spelling ‘coconut’ with your hips before?” — at first, she looked at me like I was crazy and then she busted out laughing: “Girl, no” was her reply.
Hmph. Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it because, as wild as it might sound on the surface, the word isn’t the point so much as the movements that come with spelling it out are.
When you’re moving your pelvis around to make a “c,” “o” or U-turn, not only does it intensify the level of sensation that both you and your partner feel during intercourse, it can also increase the level of blood circulation to both of your genitalia which can make your orgasms more satisfying too.
At the end of the day, spelling “coconut” is simply reminding you that there are more options to riding than simply sitting there while your partner pumps for all he’s worth or you humping up and down like you’re on a pogo stick.
Spelling “coconut” is an easy hack to bring some variety into cowgirling. However…
Honestly, the “Fruit” Isn’t the Point. THIS IS.
GiphyFrom grapefruiting and spelling “coconut” to reading articles that I’ve penned for the platform like “How To Improve The Taste Of Sperm” — fruit and sex are always going to be a winning combination, one way or another. However, the main point of this article isn’t about making sure that you are a master speller so much as providing you with tips that will make the cowgirl position something that you are confident about and you find a ton of fulfillment in doing.
You can make both of these things happen by incorporating the following things:
Stretch beforehand. A charley horse during sex is the worst thing ever — and chile, don’t let it be right before you’re about to climax. SMDH. Yeah, if you want to feel more comfortable when you’re on top, make sure that you stretch beforehand and that you are well-hydrated. That will reduce the chances of experiencing a totally-out-of-nowhere muscle spasm — whether you decide to “spell” during sex or…not.
Bring pillows into the mix. Sometimes riding is a challenge because your partner feels farther away from your body than you would like. Putting a pillow underneath him can help to elevate his pelvis, so that you don’t feel like you’re stretching and straining. Speaking of pillows, a longer one can really come in handy because it can give your knees some additional support as well.
Also, ask him to put his knees up. Speaking of making the “grind” easier for you, ask your partner to put his knees up. That way, your back can recline on his legs as you’re moving your hips around. You’d be amazed how much this one hack can do for you. Straight up.
Add lube. When you get a chance, check out “The Wetter, The Better: 10 Creative Ways To Use Lubricant” and you will automatically see why bringing lubrication into a cowgirl session is an absolute must. It reduces friction. It makes your movements glide with ease. And it’s just more fun. Promise you that.
Lean in. If your partner happens to be on the larger side of life, one way that you can control his depth is by leaning forward into him. That way, your hips can better control how much or little he is inside of you, so that you can get into a position that gives you the sensation that you are looking for.
Get him to multitask. Again, whether you are spelling “coconut” or not and whether you are riding cowgirl or reverse cowgirl — something that is awesome about being on top is it frees your partner’s hands to do, umm, other things. And since it is so much easier to have an orgasm while your clitoris is being stimulated, get your partner to put some of the lube that we discussed earlier on his fingertips, so that he can gently rub on your clitoris while you are riding him. It doesn’t get much better than that!
Don’t wanna spell? Hula Hoop then. What if you try the whole coconut thing and it’s not a favorite for you (or him)? No problem — when’s the last time that you hula hooped? Pretend that you have one of those around your hips and move around that way. I’d be shocked if you ended up feeling “meh” about that option.
5 Guys Tell Me What They Love When Their Partner Is on Top
GiphyA part of the reason why I am “team cowgirl” is because it provides a lot of benefits to the woman: she has more control, it tends to be more comfortable for her, it’s a great position for a quickie and the orgasms tend to be that much more — wonderful. However, as I was thinking about spelling coconut, in general, I couldn’t help but wonder what guys thought about it and the cowgirl position overall.
If you’re curious, here’s what five of ‘em said.
1. Braxford. Engaged. 35. “Y’all be spelling up there? Who knew? My favorite thing about when my fiancée is on top is what I think every man likes: the view. It’s a chance to see her entire body and experience it at the same time. Not even doggy style accomplishes that. Damn, where’s my lady at?”
2. Denez. Single. 42. “Do you know how many ‘spots’ you have access to when y’all are on top? Breasts are in my mouth. Hickeys are on her neck. Prop my head up on a pillow and her tummy is getting licked. When a woman is riding you, it’s sensory overload! It’s crazy how each one looks amazing in that position too.”
3. Omar. In a Serious Relationship. 29. “[He said her name yet I’m not going to share it] isn’t a very vocal lover. Her body and technique are insane, so even though I love dirty talk, I’ve learned to compromise — except when she’s on top. She’s not saying much but those moans? And yeah, we tried the coconut thing. ‘Cs’ and ‘Os,’ hell yeah. ‘Ns’ and “Ts’? Nah.”
4. Nolen. Single. 45. “45 isn’t old but it’s old enough for your back to show out on you when you least expect it. My experience has been that women don’t want a lot of thrusting when they are on top, so it’s like having some of the best sex without having to do much at all. Well, aside from trying not to bust too quickly. I take that back: riding is easy on the body; it’s work on the brain.”
5. Ivan. Married. 37. “I like the spelling sh-t because it switches things up. We make a game out of it by her picking a word and spelling out while I try and guess what it is. We also try to see how many words that we can get to before one of us cums. 12 words is pushing it unless it’s like ‘dog’ or ‘cat’ or something. I’ve guessed ‘coconut’ a few times and I get what the excitement is all about. Spelling bee sex: try it.”
Yep. I concur.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Giphy