After a long scroll on Instagram, it's very easy to feel "unpretty". Although I'm doing my squats, drinking my water, and in my bag, one look at my social media feed will have me all the way in my feelings. The con of comparison will have you going from feeling like a whole snack to a bin of junk food but Gabrielle Union wants us to chill with negative self-talk and level up our personal accountability.
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The only person standing between you and your dream body is you, and in a recent interview with Popsugar, she reminded us that 2020 is the year to become your own #BodyGoals. While many of us may think transformation takes place in the gym, Gabrielle knows that most of the real work happens in your mind. She explained:
"I think a lot of us, we think we're going to feel better if more people are looking at us positively or desiring us or are envious of us, or we become somebody's goals as opposed to being your own goals. And when I would get a similar body part, you automatically think your life is going to change. But if your soul is crooked or eroding, it really doesn't matter what the hell you look like. You're going to feel like sh*t."
I don't know who needs to hear this, but Beyoncé's lemonade diet ain't for everybody, sis. Fitness isn't one-size-fits-all and every trend that sounds good isn't good for you. The 47-year-old mother-of-one explained:
"We need to figure out what can work for a lifetime. What can work better for our long-term health goals. Because soon you're going to end up with someone else's life that you don't actually want, and it doesn't help move the needle in your own life."
Gabrielle, who says that she celebrates every New Years Eve with an epic vision board party, shared that creating a plan based on your own reality will make it much easier to keep your eye on the prize. (It's you, sis. You're the prize.)
"So I literally have last year's 2019 vision board sitting next to my 2020 vision board, and I have to walk past it to go to the bathroom. I just kind of check in to remind myself of what I want more of."
Anyone who's ever been on a fitness journey knows that wellness is an inside job, one that Gabrielle takes seriously. Along with transforming her reality into a "lifetime lifestyle of accountability," the actress says that she's on a mission to find balance—both personally and professionally, and fitness has been a way to kill two birds with one stone:
"For me, working out allows me to sort of have that mind, body, soul balance. So when I feel overwhelmed, it really helps with my anxiety. I can go to the gym and get a workout in and just release at least some of that."
To read the full interview, click here!
Featured image by Tinseltown / Shutterstock.com
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In a xoNecoleexclusive, the iconic actress opens up about embracing this season of her life, new projects, and overall being a “bad motherfucker.” Gabrielle reveals that she was 37 years old when she was diagnosed with perimenopause and is still going through it at 51 years old. Mayo Clinic says perimenopause “refers to the time during which your body makes the natural transition to menopause, marking the end of the reproductive years.”
“I haven't crossed over the next phase just yet, but I think part of it is when you hear any form of menopause, you automatically think of your mother or grandmother. It feels like an old-person thing, but for me, I was 37 and like not understanding what that really meant for me. And I don't think we focus so much on the word menopause without understanding that perimenopause is just the time before menopause,” she tells us.
Gabrielle Union
Photo by Brian Thomas
"But you can experience a lot of the same things during that period that people talk about, that they experienced during menopause. So you could get a hot flash, you could get the weight gain, the hair loss, depression, anxiety, like all of it, mental health challenges, all of that can come, you know, at any stage of the menopausal journey and like for me, I've been in perimenopause like 13, 14 years. When you know, most doctors are like, ‘Oh, but it's usually about ten years, and I'm like, ‘Uhh, I’m still going (laughs).’”
Conversations about perimenopause, fibroids, and all the things that are associated with women’s bodies have often been considered taboo and thus not discussed publicly. However, times are changing, and thanks to the Gabrielle’s and the Tia Mowry’s, more women are having an authentic discourse about women’s health. These open discussions lead to the creation of more safe spaces and support for one another.
“I want to be in community with folks. I don't ever want to feel like I'm on an island about anything. So, if I can help create community where we are lacking, I want to be a part of that,” she says. “So, it's like there's no harm in talking about it. You know what I mean? Like, I was a bad motherfucker before perimenopause. I’m a bad motherfucker now, and I'll be a bad motherfucker after menopause. Know what I’m saying? None of that has to change. How I’m a bad motherfucker, I welcome that part of the change. I'm just getting better and stronger and more intelligent, more wise, more patient, more compassionate, more empathetic. All of that is very, very welcomed, and none of it should be scary.”
The Being Mary Jane star hasn’t been shy about her stance on therapy. If you don’t know, here’s a hint: she’s all for it, and she encourages others to try it as well. She likens therapy to dating by suggesting that you keep looking for the right therapist to match your needs. Two other essential keys to her growth are radical transparency and radical acceptance (though she admits she is still working on the latter).
"I was a bad motherfucker before perimenopause. I’m a bad motherfucker now, and I'll be a bad motherfucker after menopause. Know what I’m saying? None of that has to change. How I’m a bad motherfucker, I welcome that part of the change."
Gabrielle Union and Kaavia Union-Wade
Photo by Monica Schipper/Getty Images
“I hope that a.) you recognize that you're not alone. Seek out help and know that it's okay to be honest about what the hell is happening in your life. That's the only way that you know you can get help, and that's also the only other way that people know that you are in need if there's something going on,” she says, “because we have all these big, very wild, high expectations of people, but if they don't know what they're actually dealing with, they're always going to be failing, and you will always be disappointed. So how about just tell the truth, be transparent, and let people know where you are. So they can be of service, they can be compassionate.”
Gabrielle’s transparency is what makes her so relatable, and has so many people root for her. Whether through her TV and film projects, her memoirs, or her social media, the actress has a knack for making you feel like she’s your homegirl. Scrolling through her Instagram, you see the special moments with her family, exciting new business ventures, and jaw-dropping fashion moments. Throughout her life and career, we’ve seen her evolve in a multitude of ways. From producing films to starting a haircare line to marriage and motherhood, her journey is a story of courage and triumph. And right now, in this season, she’s asking, “What’s next?”
“This is a season of discovery and change. In a billion ways,” says the NAACP Image Award winner. “The notion of like, ‘Oh, so and so changed. They got brand new.’ I want you to be brand new. I want me to be brand new. I want us to be always constantly growing, evolving. Having more clarity, moving with different purpose, like, and all of that is for me very, very welcomed."
"I want you to be brand new. I want me to be brand new. I want us to be always constantly growing, evolving. Having more clarity, moving with different purpose, like, and all of that is for me very, very welcomed."
She continues, “So I'm just trying to figure out what's next. You know what I mean? I'm jumping into what's next. I'm excited going into what's next and new. I'm just sort of embracing all of what life has to offer.”
Look out for Gabrielle in the upcoming indie film Riff Raff, which is a crime comedy starring her and Jennifer Coolidge, and she will also produce The Idea of You, which stars Anne Hathaway.
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