Oral sex. While it's kind of the activity that everyone (or at least, almost everyone) does and yet doesn't openly talk about it all of the time, I feel like it's important that I provide as much information as possible on the topic. After all, knowledge is power, and the more you know about sex—all kinds of sex—the better. Well, when it comes to fellatio specifically, a couple of years back, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, "Do You Swallow? The Unexpected Health Benefits Of Sperm". It touched on sperm from the angle of all of the ways that it can benefit your system—and chile, there are many.
Yet it's hard to take advantage of all that sperm (and semen; the fluid that holds sperm) has to offer if you can't stand that taste of it. You know it. I know it. Well, a way to take better control of how it resonates with your taste buds is to make sure your partner applies certain foods to his diet while avoiding certain others. If you'd like a quick cheat sheet of how to improve the taste of sperm, I've included five foods he should eat and five that he should eat less of. If he wants to get some, that is. (By the way, I'm gonna say sperm all throughout this; just know that semen is included in my thoughts.)
For sperm to taste better, he should eat: Celery
Celery doesn't taste like much of anything. That's why it trips me out that it has so many health benefits to it. Celery is good for you because it's a good source of vitamins A, C, and K, along with folate, potassium, magnesium, iron, and antioxidants. Consuming it can help to reduce bodily inflammation, and improve digestion and it can even help to lower your cholesterol levels. Plus, celery contains properties that can help to prevent cancer.
The reason why it tops the list of things that your man should eat is because, for one thing, the Vitamin C and phytonutrients in it will actually help to increase his sperm count and motility. Not only that but the Vitamin C in celery can also help to take some of the salty taste out of sperm. As a bonus, celery is also known to be an aphrodisiac food, thanks to the pheromones that it produces. Yep, celery can actually make you enjoy the scent of sperm more. Imagine that.
For sperm to taste better, he shouldn't eat: Dairy
Dairy is a bit of a controversial topic, although there is more and more data coming out that it's really not the best for us overall. As far as the belief that dairy strengthens our bones, it's actually more effective to up your Vitamin D dosage instead. Because dairy increases an insulin growth factor in our body called IGF-1, it actually has the ability to increase the cancer risk in our system. While studies have revealed the dairy doesn't actually produce more mucus, what it does do is make it thicker and more irritating. Dairy consumption also increases the risk of breakouts, prostate cancer in your man and ovarian cancer in you.
There are a couple of reasons why dairy is a no-no as far as sperm goes. First, it has the ability to decrease motility in men and even cause sperm to end up having an abnormal shape. Also, dairy has a tendency to alter to taste of semen (and not in a good way), not to mention that it can make your man gassy and…who wants to deal with that during sex. Uh-uh.
To improve the taste of sperm, he should eat: Mint
I don't know a ton of people who just chew on sprigs of mint. Still, fresh mint is something that you can put into your drinking water, smoothie or in some of the dishes that you prepare—and, of course, there is always herbal mint tea. It's well worth the effort because mint contains a fair amount of fiber, Vitamin A and iron. It can help to relieve indigestion ,irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) and even improve brain function. Did you know that mint can even relieve cold-related symptoms (due to the menthol that's in it) and decrease breastfeeding discomfort? And, of course, it's one of the most effective ways to get rid of bad breath.
While there are some studies that spearmint and peppermint can slight decrease testosterone levels in women, when men consume it a couple of times a week, it does have a way of making sperm less acidic which can give it a bit of a sweeter, umm, aftertaste. So yeah, pick some up, the next time you're in the produce section.
To improve the taste of sperm, he shouldn't eat: Sulfur-Based Foods
Sulfur is an interesting mineral in the sense that our bodies aren't able to produce it; we have to consume it in order to get it into our system. Foods that are high in sulfur include garlic, onions, eggs, broccoli, cabbage, radishes, parmesan cheese and scallops—just to name a few. All of these foods are beneficial because sulfur can help to reduce the risk of heart disease, can lessen joint and muscle pain, can definitely clear up acne (I am a big-time sulfur soap fan) and it can also help to keep you from developing things like Alzheimer's disease and Parkinson's disease up the road.
I'm pretty sure it takes no guessing why sulfur-based foods are the wackest when it comes to fellatio, though. Sulfur stinks—point blank and period. And it tends to pass along a bit of its odor while also intensifying sperm's somewhat naturally bitter taste. Yeah, hard pass.
For sperm to taste better, he should eat: Fresh Fruit
Fresh fruit tastes so good. If you've ever wondered which ones are the healthiest, some that top the list are grapefruit, avocado, pineapple, berries (basically all berries), watermelon, olives, oranges, bananas, papayas and cherries. All are high in antioxidants. All are loaded with fiber. All contain vitamins A, C, folate and phytochemicals (plant compounds). All are filled with water and low in calories.
Your man eating fruit is a good idea because the micronutrients in it will improve his sperm concentration. Plus, fruit can help to take the "bite" off of sperm (you know, the copper/sour taste that it sometimes has). Also, fruit has a way of making sperm taste better too; a little sweeter, even.
For sperm to taste better, he shouldn't eat: Red Meat
Red meat could really get its own article because there are so many pros and cons to it. For the sake of time and space, a pro is that it's really high in iron. Meanwhile, a con is it typically contains a lot of saturated fat which can lead to high cholesterol levels and heart disease overall.
The reason why your man may need to push the plate back more often on the sperm tip is because red meat can make sperm taste really salty (poultry makes it less this way). So, unless you totally dig that idea, a black bean burger might be what he should have leading up to, well, you know.
He should eat: Spices
Ginger. Cinnamon. Nutmeg. Cocoa. Rosemary. These are just a handful of spices that are really good for your health because they are rich in antioxidants, are able to reduce bodily inflammation, can help to lower blood sugar levels and so much more.
And why should you encourage your man to sprinkle some of these on his food? They are just one more thing that can help to pull some of the acid out of sperm so that it tastes a little sweeter. Not sweet like cake but definitely less tart and easier to…take in.
He shouldn't eat: Caffeine
I've said before that caffeine comes with its ups and downs as far as health benefits go. Today, let's just stick to the upswing. If you consume it in moderation (because it is a stimulant that is a drug that could lead to an addiction, if you're not careful), caffeine has the ability to (temporarily) increase your energy levels, burn fat, lower your risk of getting type 2 diabetes, protect your liver and can also put you into a better mood.
The reason why you should discourage your man from having more than a cup of java or scoop of coffee ice cream on a daily basis is because it can cause his sperm to taste pretty bitter. Kinda like licking a penny. And unless that's your thing, it's not.
He should drink: Wheatgrass
I'm not really sure if a lot of folks are thrilled with the idea of taking in shots of wheatgrass. Still, it does top the list of superfoods and when you see the benefits that it provides, it's easy to see why. Wheatgrass is a type of grass that is loaded with chlorophyll, antioxidants, and all kinds of nutrients. It's great for your health because it works to boost your metabolism; purify your blood; detox your system of metals; cleanse your liver; treat body odor; naturally heal symptoms related to eczema and psoriasis and boost your immunity—and so much more.
And how does it help out in the sperm department? Thanks to the high amount of chlorophyll that's in it, it can help to keep the pH level of sperm in check (which should be somewhere between 7.2 and 8.0) which makes it less acidic and more pleasurable to your taste buds.
He shouldn't drink: Alcohol
Last one. If you check out my article, "Liquors That Are Gluten-Free (& Beneficial In Other Ways)", you'll find that there are some health benefits to alcohol—and not just red wine. Shoot, the antioxidants that are in a lot of alcoholic drinks are enough of a reason to pour yourself a glass of somethin' a couple of times a week.
Just make sure that your man isn't tippin' a few bottles back before it's time to put some work in. For some reason, it has a way of causing sperm to taste sour. So, unless you enjoy sucking on lemons (no pun intended, of course), alcohol should be consumed right before "the act", not hours prior. Enjoy!
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Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
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Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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If, while on your continual journey to get the best out of your own tresses, you’d like to learn how to get them healthier than it’s ever been, I’ve got seven acids that are typically known for skin use that can be just as beneficial to your hair as well.
1. Salicylic Acid
When it comes to your skin, salicylic acid is beta-hydroxy acid that is great for your skin if you’re looking for something that will exfoliate it, clear out your pores and dissolve dead skin cells. In fact, this is why it’s an acid that is quite popular when it comes to treating acne.
Your hair will enjoy salicylic acid because, if you’re looking to remove product build-up, you want to soothe an itchy or irritated scalp or you’ve got some dandruff flakes that are totally driving you up the wall, salicylic acid has the ability to treat all of this. Either purchasing a shampoo that contains this ingredient or adding it to your favorite scalp scrub is probably the most effective way to get the most out of it.
Just make sure that if your scalp is sensitive or dry that you approach with caution. In these instances, it could end up irritating your scalp more than helping it out, so use a very little bit in the beginning to make sure that it vibes with you.
2. Lactic Acid
Lactic acid is an alpha hydroxy acid that can help to even out your skin tone as well as slow down the signs of aging. The properties in it help to do this by reducing hyperpigmentation and boosting collagen production in your skin as well as keeping it hydrated.
Why is it great for your locks? For one thing, lactic acid is considered to be a humectant. This means that it pulls water from the air so that your hair is able to remain moisturized.
Another thing that makes it a winner is the fact that lactic acid breaks down dead skin cells on your scalp (so that your hair follicles are able to flourish), it can help to soften and detangle your hair (making it a helpful addition on your wash days) and it also helps to protect your tresses from heat styling tools and UV damage. Applying a hair rinse that’s made up of part lactic acid and part water can work wonderfully (so long as you apply it once a month, tops; more than that might be too “intense” for your hair strands).
3. Glycolic Acid
Glycolic acid is a water-soluble alpha hydroxy acid that is actually made from sugar. Your skin will adore it because it smooths the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles, improves the texture of your skin, gently exfoliates, clears your pores and brightens up your complexion overall.
The reasons why you should consider this acid for your hair is because it helps to keep your scalp youthful (and yes, there is such a thing; check out “Your Scalp Ages Six Times Faster Than Your Face. Why It Matters.”), removes excess sebum (that could be clogging up your hair follicles) and it helps to keep your hair moisturized. Your best bet here is to make it a part of your pre-shampooing ritual.
4. Succinic Acid
Succinic acid is an acid that is made from sugar cane and contains antimicrobial and anti-inflammatory properties. Although it doesn’t exactly exfoliate (like many of these other acids do), it can still be beneficial to your skin when it comes to reducing the kind of irritation that is associated with eczema, decreasing the bacteria that leads to breakouts and keeping your skin pretty hydrated.
As far as your hair goes, this is an acid that is worth trying out because it helps to balance the sebum that is on your scalp, remove dead skin and product build-up that can irritate your scalp and clog your hair follicles and, succinic acid is also beneficial when it comes to reducing dandruff and helping to prevent hair loss. Most people tend to apply this as a serum.
5. Hyaluronic Acid
I’ve officially sung the praises of hyaluronic acid on this platform before. One example is via the article, “Why Your Skin, Hair, And Nails Need Hyaluronic Acid Like...Yesterday.” On the skin tip, hyaluronic acid is great because it deeply hydrates your skin, contains anti-aging properties and can even bring relief to vaginal (including vulvar) dryness.
Your hair will adore this particular acid because it aids moisture to it (including your hair follicles), will help to improve your hair’s texture and it also soothes scalp dryness, nurtures the cuticles of your tresses and decreases frizz. Using a serum rich in this acid as a pre-poo or as a leave-in conditioner is recommended.
6. Azelaic Acid
If you’ve never heard of azelaic acid before, this is your lucky day. It’s a dicarboxylic acid that, when it comes to skincare (and hair care) products, is usually synthetic. Anyway, if you are looking for a way to reduce inflammation, even skin tone after a breakout or if you want to use an exfoliant that will improve the texture of your skin overtime, you might want to give this acid a shot.
This one makes the list as far as your hair is concerned because, if achieving more inches is your current focus, azelaic acid might come in handy. That’s because it is able to strengthen your hair, thicken your strands and also stimulate hair growth from within your hair follicles.
7. Glutamic Acid
Glutamic acid is actually a type of amino acid. Skin-wise, it’s great for deeply hydrating your skin as well as protecting it from pollutants and damaging UV rays. Also, if you’re looking for an acid that treats skin dryness or “tightness,” this could be the answer to your prayers.
Since glutamic acid is also considered to be a humectant, it’s another acid that can moisturize your hair. As a result, it can decrease breakage while helping your hair to feel smooth and look shiny.
BONUS: Amino Acids
Speaking of amino acids and hair, please try to keep some amino acids in your diet at all times. The reason why is because, since your hair is made up of mostly protein (keratin, to be exact), amino acids are pretty darn effective when it comes to helping you to maintain the overall health and well-being of your hair.
Ones to prioritize include proline (it boosts collagen so that your hair strands can maintain flexibility); arginine (it increases blood flow to your hair follicles so that they can receive the nutrients that they need); cysteine (it helps to keep your hair follicles healthy); alanine (it helps your system to produce more collagen), and isoleucine (it strengthens the tissues that help to make up your hair strands). All of these are available in supplement form or you can use Google to see which foods contain them.
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Although it might initially seem odd to apply acid to your hair, as you can see, certain ones will work miracles for it. So, test them out to see which one tickles your fancy.
Hell, since they work for your skin as well — it’s a two-for-one deal that is worth every penny!
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