
Visual Artist Grace Lynne Got Here By Putting Black Women First In Her Craft

In xoNecole's "How She Got Here", we uncover the journey of fearless, ambitious women at the top of their game with unconventional not-so-everyday careers. Instead of asking them about their careers, xoNecole dissects the hardships, rejections and nontraditional roads travelled by these women to create the positions they have today.
While Grace Lynne Haynes may be the 28-year-old painter behind the scenes, her artwork surely isn't. We're willing to bet that your favorite New Yorker covers starring "flat female figures in a single line," as described by Elle.com, have been curated by the Los Angeles native herself. "I find that Black women are leaning towards more diverse representations. We've all heard of the strong Black woman archetype, and I think so many of us are tired of this type of imagery," Haynes told xoNecole about the evolution of artistic portrayal of Black women, especially during the height of the Black Lives Matter movement.
"I know so many Black women who crave representation that showcases other attributes to our womanhood such as our nurturing side, the way we have kinship with one another and our vulnerability which is often left unprotected. I see more of these presentations through various art films such as television, social media and photography. Could there be a more diverse and nuanced representation? Of course, but we have come a long way."
Though there is no traditional route or rulebook to becoming an artist, Grace Lynne acknowledges her journey as one that she has learned from to become the woman in the creative spaces that she is today. "I got here simply through hard work, sacrifice, and faith in God," the Art Center College of Design graduate told xoNecole. "Stepping into my artistic identity was a spiritual decision, and when you are connected to your creative spirit, it will guide you on where to go and whom to go to."
For this installment of "How She Got Here", xoNecole spoke with Grace Lynne about the spiritual journey that led her to her artistry, getting rejected from her top choice graduate school and the lessons she's learned along the way of her journey as an artist:
AN ARTISTS’ DUTY IS TO REFLECT THE TIME
Courtesy of Grace Lynne
Nick Romanenko
At the beginning of our interview, Haynes quoted singer-songwriter and activist Nina Simone to best describe who she is as an artist and why she does what she does: "An artist's duty is to reflect the time." "I firmly believe that an artist shows what society has the potential to be, or reflects the reality of society to its audience," she said as she defined her purpose.
Grace Lynne Haynes always knew that she had a keen interest in art from a young age, but stopped drawing during her teenage years because she felt "discouraged and didn't see the purpose." It wasn't until her early 20s when she began to sit with her purpose and passion for art and strategically shape her future around happiness and her pursuit of it. After exploring art through community art classes and Tumblr blogging, Haynes had a spiritual moment of realization and tapped into the new artistic waves of her brain.
"Colors were brighter, scents were stronger and it was as if my life experience overall was enhanced and much more visible. Since then, I made a commitment to dedicate my life to art making. This wasn't just a practical decision, it was spiritual. This made the journey seamless and everflowing, because I was in my purpose and I was willing to do the hard work."
When Haynes decided to take her passion and transform it into a career, she started as a commercial illustrator and designer - but admittedly had much apprehension about the flow of money. "Coming from a low-income background, I knew I wanted to pursue a creative career but was afraid of the income trajectory. I figured commercial art was a way to be creative and bring in consistent income." Throughout her undergraduate career she had various jobs throughout her career path that both generated income and drive for her passion, including painting for a denim company, freelance commissioning for theatre companies, teaching art classes, and working as a Communications Manager for a non-profit. "Transitioning into the gallery world so soon was a complete surprise. I always say the gallery world chose me, not the other way around. I always painted as a hobby, and showcased my works online. Eventually my hobby started to garner more attention than my commercial art and I was able to become a full-time artist," Haynes revealed to xoNecole.
Above all things, her confidence in her talent and artistic abilities is a key component in who Grace Lynne Haynes is today. "If I'm not confident, then my creativity lacks and I'm not motivated to be ambitious. Even at the very early stages of my career, I've always been super confident in my work," she said. "I would apply for top notch residencies, art programs and scholarships even though my work was still in the development stages. My applications and artist statements were always confident, and this led me to Kehinde Wiley's Black Rock Senegal Residency which completely changed my life and career."
Nick Romanenko
THE CREATIVE PROCESS
Unfortunately, during the coronavirus, like most creatives, Haynes had to readjust and turn lemons into lemonade. "Each day looks different, especially because of COVID and I am also in graduate school," said the current Rutgers University student about her day-to-day routine as an artist. "On a typical weekday, I have class in the morning, and I head to my art studio right after. Some days instead of going to the studio I'll read a book that is related to my art thesis. The book I am currently reading is Glitch Feminism by Legacy Russell. Some days, with all of the heaviness in the world, I don't feel inspired to create so I'll do research or sketch to take the pressure off."
When it comes to the actual painting, Haynes prefers to sketch before hitting the brushes and toy around with compositions and colors. "For the pose, sometimes I'll have a friend pose for me or will do a few poses myself for visual reference. After a bit of experimentation, I begin to paint on the actual canvas itself."
"The majority of my ideas come from an accumulation of imagery and experiences I have collected within my subconscious or on my laptop. In my work, I like to use color as a verb, as a form of action. I'm very interested in the colors that we choose to wear and surround ourselves with and how that shapes our environment."
Similar to her creative process, the journey of being an artist - a Black female artist at that - is no cake walk, but Haynes has mastered the art of riding the wave and learning to go with the flow.
Nick Romanenko
THE NEW YORK[ER] STATE OF MIND
When you trust the process, you'd be surprised at the outcome and where life can lead you. Who would've thought that this would have led Grace Lynne Haynes to land her acclaimed interpretation of Sojourner Truth on the cover of The New Yorker to mark the hundredth anniversary of the Nineteenth Amendment. She described the major placement as "the most thrilling experience," especially during the peak of the Black Lives Matter movement. "So many people were supporting Black artists by reposting and sharing our artworks. I received about 8,000 new followers in less than two weeks, which led to my work attracting the attention of VOGUE and eventually The New Yorker. They reached out about the opportunity to submit sketches to celebrate the '100th Anniversary of Women's Rights'. I had two days to make the painting, and stayed up all night to finish the final product. It was all worth it in the end and I'd do it all over again."
As an advocate for Black women through her work, and as she said in a CNN interview, Grace Lynne takes it upon herself to "explore what it means to be a Black woman in 2020" in her artwork.
"In my work, I strive to think about how being both a millennial and a Black woman have shaped my perspective on womanhood. I think this is an era where Black women are finally getting opportunities to pursue freedom. We are able to have flourishing careers, pursue our passion and be more selective about who we choose to partner with."
"There are so many sacred havens, especially online, of Black women coming together and giving tips on how to survive and thrive in this world with what has been given to us. I strive to showcase Black women in their own sacred spaces and interiors," she continued to tell xoNecole. "The way we choose to decorate these interiors, and the colors we choose to showcase all are representative of our individual identities. I strive to showcase this in my work. "
Nick Romanenko
5 Lessons We Learned From Grace Lynne's Career Journey
Don’t Think, Just Do
"One of the major challenges is the pressure to make art strictly for capital gain. It's important that the work comes from the heart, and not to think too much about how it fits into the 'art market' or if it will sell. Thinking about this waters down my art process, and creates an anxious art process. Fortunately, I am now at a place to fully explore my creativity without any bounds. I think every artist should do check-ins with their work to make sure the market isn't swaying their decision on what to create."
Patience Is Key
"I've never had a moment where I wanted to give up or change career paths. Even through intense struggle and rejection, I knew that this is all part of the journey. I've had moments where I thought, is the hard work really worth it? But I realized sometimes it takes a few years for the world to notice the work. Paintings that I created over four years ago are finally getting recognition. Sometimes it's dependent on timing."
Learning The Difference Between Loneliness & Being Alone
"I've learned that success is great, but it doesn't mean much if you have no one to celebrate it with. I used to isolate myself when creating and building my career. When things began to pick up, I looked around and realized I wasn't too happy with my social life and relationships that I was building. My mental health was not at its best either, and it was affecting my interactions with people. I took time to slow down and focus on my personal life, and ensure that I had a stable and supportive community around me. It's so important to not neglect your mental health, because success can feel empty if you don't have a well-rounded life. Career success isn't the only type of success, and shouldn't be the only focus in your life. Balance is essential for a more well-rounded type of success."
Start From The Bottom & You’ll Get Here
"Do the work, there is no way out of it. We all have to pay our dues. In the beginning, you'll have to deal with the rejection letters, working to build others careers, and doing jobs that you aren't passionate about. This is part of the process, and it's a season we all have to cope with. Remember everyone has a different timeline, and sometimes your career might blossom at a different pace than your peers and this is OK. Also don't let your ego get in the way of great opportunities for fear of rejection. I know so many artists that don't apply for opportunities because they hate the idea of being rejected. Develop a healthy detachment from your work to be able to not take everything personally, and look at your work outside of yourself."
No Regrets, Just Lessons Learned
"I've made many mistakes in my career and will continue to do so because I am human. It is all a part of the journey, that is how you learn and grow. I've been fired from certain positions, missed deadlines and opportunities, and miscommunicated. I can't turn back or redo anything so I simply look forward knowing that I am not perfect and I am a young artist still figuring out her way."
For more information on Grace Lynne, follow her on Instagram and check out her official website.
Featured image courtesy of Nick Romanenko
Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by YouTube/xoNecole
My personal relationship with birth control pills is a bit of an odd one. Back when I first became sexually active (I started having sex with my first boyfriend a couple of months shy of 19), I took them for a couple of months, didn’t like how they made me feel, and so I quit using them altogether (and got pregnant almost immediately after). The rest of my adult life, I stayed off of the pill and pretty much only used condoms (and even then, not consistently — SMDH).
And yet here I am, now, all these years later, back on them again: surprise, surprise.
These days, it's for a completely different purpose, though. Now that I am in the hopefully latter stages of perimenopause (I’m not sure because my mother had a full hysterectomy at 29, her mother died at 53 and I don’t deal with my paternal grandmother because…chile… ) — although I have always had relatively easy cycles and I could definitely set my watch to them, about two years ago, my periods started to show up whenever they felt like it and it was damn near a crime scene once they did.
It was driving me crazy, and so, my nurse practitioner recommended that I take progestin-only pills to shorten, if not completely stop, my cycle: “After a year or so, we can wean off and see if you are entering into menopause on your own.” (Whew, perimenopause, chile.)
Although the first five months of being on this particular pill made me wonder if it was worth it to take this approach, I actually re-upped for another 12-month cycle because the extra progestin (a synthetic form of progesterone) has benefitted me in other areas as well because I am sleeping more soundly and my weight is more stabilized (by the way, when these things are “off,” they are signs of low progesterone levels). However, I did ask my nurse practitioner if, once I do decide to wean off of the pill, would there be any issues.
Her response is what inspired me to write this article because, until she said “post-birth control syndrome” to me, I had no idea there was such a thing. Anyway, if you give me a sec, I’ll explain to you what it is and why you should care if hormone-related birth control is currently a part of your life.
Yes, Post-Birth Control Syndrome Is a Very Real Thing
Okay, so it’s important to always remember that the way that birth control works is it “manipulates” your hormones so that you can significantly reduce your chances of conceiving. This means that taking them could result in some side effects including nausea; weight gain; headaches; irregular periods and/or spotting; increased stress; depression; blurry vision; breast tenderness, and/or a lowered libido.
That said, even though birth control pills are basically 99 percent effective (when taken correctly and consistently), if the side effects that you are experiencing are making you close to miserable, you should absolutely share that with your healthcare provider because…what’s the sense in preventing pregnancy when you don’t even feel up to having sex because you don’t feel good or your sex drive is shot? More times than not, your provider can find you another pill brand or option that will help you to feel more like yourself.
With that out of the way, think about it — if going on the pill can produce side effects, why would going off of it…not? And this is where post-birth control syndrome comes in.
For the most part, it’s what can happen to your body once you decide to come off of birth control. Typically, the symptoms will last anywhere between 4-6 months and, although the symptoms seem to present themselves most intensely as it relates to going off of the pill, any hormone-related birth control (like IUDs, injections, patches, the ring or implants) could produce similar outcomes.
Outcomes like what?
- Irregular cycles
- Breakouts
- Excessive gas and/or bloating
- Weight gain
- Anxiety and/or depression
- Fertility issues
- Migraines and/or headaches
- Shifts in your libido
- Sleeplessness/restlessness
- Hair loss
Whoa, right? And if a part of you is wondering, “Okay, if this is indeed the case, why have I not heard of this syndrome before?” It’s because it’s not a term that conventional method uses nearly as much as alternative medicine does. Still, it makes all of the sense in the world that if your body has to adjust to an uptick in hormonal intake, it would also need to adjust to removing those extra doses of hormones from your system as well. COMMON. DAMN. SENSE.
Anyway, if you were thinking about taking a break from birth control and taking all of this in has you feeling a bit…let’s go with the word “trepidatious” about doing so, I totally get it. There are some things that you can do to make experiencing post-birth control syndrome either a non-issue or a far more bearable one, though.
7 Home Remedies That Can Make Coping with Post-Birth Control Syndrome Easier
1. Take a multivitamin.Something that’s fascinating about what going off of birth control can do is it sometimes has the ability to lower your nutrition levels as it relates to certain vitamins and minerals; this is especially the case when it comes to vitamins B, C, E and minerals like magnesium, selenium and zinc. So, if you don’t currently take a multivitamin, now would be the time to start (along with consuming foods that are particularly high in those nutrients as well).
2. Up your vitamin D intake. Speaking of nutrient levels, a vitamin level that commonly drops after going off of birth control isvitamin D. This is hella critical to keep in mind as a Black woman since many of us tend to be naturally deficient in the vitamin as-is and vitamin D is important when it comes to fighting off diseases, regulating weight and keeping your moods stabilized (for starters). So, make sure that your multivitamin has vitamin D in it. Also make sure to consume vitamin D-enriched foods like fatty fish, eggs, mushrooms, yogurt and fortified orange juice.
3. Drink herbal teas. Since going off of birth control will cause your hormones to be all over the place for a season, consider drinking some herbal teas that will help to stabilize them. Black cohosh contains phytoestrogen properties, Chasteberry can help to level out your prolactin levels and green tea can help your hormones out by helping to balance out your insulin (which can sometimes directly affect them).
4. Keep some ibuprofen nearby. The headaches and migraines? Until those subside, you and ibuprofen are probably going to become really good friends; although I will add that ginger tea and inhaling essential oils like chamomile and lavender can help to ease migraine-related symptoms too.
5. Do some meditating. Waiting for your hormones to get back on track can be stressful as all get out. That said, something that can get your cortisol (stress hormone) levels to chill out is to meditate. If meditation is new for you, check out “7 Meditation Hacks (For People Who Can't Seem To Do It).”
6. Get massages. As if you needed an excuse to get a massage, right (check out “12 Different Massage Types. How To Know Which Is Right For You.”)? However, there is some evidence to back the fact that regular massages (somewhere around once a month) can help to lower your stress, boost your dopamine, increase blood flow and drain your lymphatic system so that you will have more energy.
7. Sleep/rest more. There is plenty of scientific research out here which says that sleep deprivation can throw your hormones out of whack — and since your hormones are already trying to stabilize themselves, you definitely need to get 6-8 hours of sleep and not feel the least bit guilty about taking naps sometimes too.
____
Post-birth control syndrome may not be the most pleasant thing about getting off of birth control yet it is manageable. So, now that you know all about it, you can feel more confident about taking a birth control break (or getting off altogether) — without the surprises that can come with doing it. Give thanks.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Unsplash