10 Post-Menopausal Women Share What They Wish They Knew About Menopause

1. Esther. 54.

“What I was completely unprepared for isthe fatigue that the transition sends you through. For like two years, all I could think about was how much I couldn’t wait to get into my bed and I was never that kind of person before. I was starting to wonder if I was in denial about being depressed, so I mentioned it to my doctor and she said that it was becauseestrogen gives you an energy boost and mine was on the decline. I didn’t want to do any estrogen therapy and so I ate more foods that have estrogen in them and took a few estrogen supplements. All of this helped.”

Shellie here: Plant-based estrogen is called phytoestrogen. Foods that contain phytoestrogen include peaches, berries, cauliflower, broccoli, garlic, oats and flaxseeds. As far as supplements that can increase your estrogen levels, I’m always gonna be a fan of evening primrose oil along with chasteberry and vitamins B and D.

2. Theia. 45.

“Please make sure that before you go through a full hysterectomy that you speak with at least three professionals. I had so many fibroids and cysts that my doctor told me to get one and I didn’t know enough about what was going on to request to keep at least one of my ovaries. They took everything. That kicked me into early menopause and it hasn’t been fun. Do your own research. It’s more available than ever.”

3. Farron. 52.

“Dry skin. Out of all of the things that perimenopause put me through, that is the thing that annoyed me the most because, no matter how much I tried to moisturize my skin, it would feel scratchy and parched within a matter of hours — and that was hell during the night because my back and legs were constantly itchy. Drinking more water is a good hack but so is taking an omega-3 supplement, sealing your skin when you get out of the shower and applying something thick like shea butter at night.”

Shellie here: The reason why dry skin upticks during perimenopause is because, as your estrogen levels fluctuate, it tends to lower your sebum and collagen levels. That’s why consuming more collagen (like a supplement or collagen-enriched foods like citrus fruit, bone broth and egg whites) can also be beneficial for you.

4. Michelle. 56.

“I never thought about peeing as much as I did going through menopause. I used to be the one who would watch those Depend commercials and be like ‘That’s for old folks.’ But then I started noticing that when I laughed, a little pee would come out. And sometimes at night, my panties would be soaked before even making it to the bathroom. My doctor told me that my hormones were all over the place and that can impact my bladder, mostly because my pelvic walls were weaker. Kegels helped but be prepared for the squirts. Most women I know go through that.”

5. Alania. 55.

“I wish I knew that menopause only lasts a day — Shellie actually told me that and it was about a year after I [officially] went through menopause. You’re not actually going through menopause; you’re going through perimenopause which is all of the stuff that happens before menopause. That would’ve given me a greater understanding of some of the stuff that was happening to me in my late 30s that I didn’t quite understand, and it would’ve caused me to research post-menopause a lot sooner. Shellie has always said that once we get our period, we are dealing with it, one way or another, for the rest of our lives. She is absolutely correct.”

Shellie here: Okay, so the average age that a woman goes into menopause is 51. Perimenopause-related symptoms tend to start around 8-10 years before menopause and can last from 4-8 years (I know, right?). Post-menopause consists of symptoms that may or may not occur after you’ve officially experienced menopause and it can last for the rest of your life (which is why some women opt for post-menopausal hormone therapy). Those symptoms can include insomnia, a low libido, incontinence, vaginal dryness and night sweats. Like I said, your period impacts you, somehow, some way, the rest of your life, chile.

6. Grace. 50.

“The way that it will f-ck your entire shape up! I’m telling you that somebody should’ve told me that one day, my waist would be snatched to the gods and the next day — where the hell did it go? And guys, I’m someone who works out on the regular! Your hormones changing changes everything about you. Talk to a nutritionist who specializes in menopause and watch foods that create inflammation. It seems to make you look more bloated than ever when you’re menopausal.”

Shellie here: She ain’t neva lied. SMDH. That’s why I wrote article for the platform like “Perimenopause Shifting Your Shape? 7 Ways to Deal” and “'Menopause Belly' Actually Is A Real Thing. Here's How To Handle It.”

7. Leone. 52.

“I’m the woman who thinks that we should automatically be able to work from home 2-3 days a week while we’re on our period because if your cramps are anything like mine were — I’ll put it this way: it’s a miracle that I was able to concentrate on anything at all. Same thing for going through menopause because what was really difficult for me was the constant brain fog that I was experiencing. I couldn’t really remember anything. I would do certain tasks more than once. It was like I was gaslighting myself. I was miserable.”

Shellie here: It truly can’t be said enough that sleep is not a luxury; it is an absolute necessity, especially when you’re going through perimenopause. Sleep, consuming less alcohol and playing memory-themed games are some all-natural ways to combat brain fog if that is something that you are currently experiencing.

8. Kristen. 53.

“I’m starting to notice more articles and even commercials about menopause and that’s a good thing because I think what I wish I knew was more about menopause, period. Come to think about it, we need to do better about menstrual education because all I really knew about my period is that I was going to bleed and it might hurt and, it wasn’t until my periods were all over the place, that I started doing my own research on menopause. We don’t freak out when winter comes because we know about it. I think menopause would be easier on most of us if we had as much information about it as possible.”

9. Erra. 48.

“I wish I had been told to seek out my family history more and to get my hormone levels checked after 35 whether my physician recommended it or not. I ended up going into early menopause because my hormone levels were dangerously low. When I mentioned it to my mother and one of my aunts, they said that the same thing happened to them. Imagine if I had known that in my 20s and 30s. Be proactive about knowing as much as you can about your health.”

10. Helyn. 53.

“Are there menopause life coaches? If not, there should be. All you pretty much hear about menopause is you’re not going to have a period anymore and you might experience some hot flashes. Girl, menopause is an entire life transition. Your hormones change. Your body changes. Your sex life changes. And that causes you to see yourself, your relationships and even some of your life goals differently. I wish I had gotten into some sort of therapy before menopause. It would’ve kept me from wondering what in the world was going on with me every other day.”

Shellie here: I did a bit of digging and it would appear that menopause (life) coaching is a growing field. If you’re interested in becoming a menopause coach yourself, here is where you may find some answers to your initial questions. A tip? Do check with ICF to see if any coaching program that you’re considering is ICF accredited; that will help to give you more relevance in the life coaching industry.

___

Again, contrary to what society tells you, there is not one wrong thing with aging. Aging is a blessing. In fact, Proverbs 20:29(NKJV) says, “The glory of young men is their strength, and the splendor of old men is their gray head.”

Menopause is a part of the process — and the more you know, the less stressful it has to be.

And again, here’s hoping that the advice of these women has eased your mind in some way — so that you can embrace your season instead of dreading it…whenever it chooses to come your way.

Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.