Money Talks is an xoNecole series where we talk candidly to real women about how they spend money, their relationship with money, and how they get it.
Dora Belle is more than your average pretty girl from Long Island, New York - she's an entrepreneur, accountant, and the founder of The Tax Collective. The Brooklyn-based beauty successfully runs a tax firm that focuses on small- and mid-size businesses, startups, and tax audits while keeping her personal finances in check. As a licensed enrolled agent who possesses the ability to represent her clients in tax court, she has proven that being a beautiful woman can include brilliance and crunching numbers.
Courtesy of Dora Belle
When the St. John's University honors graduate was asked by xoNecole about the worst money or business-related decision she's ever made, Dora responded, "I didn't trust my gut." Clearly as someone who has worked for New York State Department of Taxation and Finance, Morgan Stanley, and Ernst & Young in the Private Client Services group where she specialized in high-net worth individuals with assets in management of over $2 million, her intuition hasn't steered her too far in the wrong direction.
xoNecole had the chance to catch up with The Tax Collective founder for the latest installment of "Money Talks" about traveling through Europe, the importance of investing, and leaving corporate America:
On how much she tries to save per month:
"It depends on the month. My income is not received evenly throughout the year. I have high seasons and low [seasons]. Like during tax season when I'm the busiest, I save over 50% of my income. In the low season, when I'm just managing audits and notices, I try to put away at least 20% of my earnings every month."
"I have high seasons and low [seasons]. Like during tax season when I'm the busiest, I save over 50% of my income. In the low season, when I'm just managing audits and notices, I try to put away at least 20% of my earnings every month."
On whether her savings are in a high-yield savings or a Roth IRA:
"I don't believe the high-yield savings accounts are worth it. On average, you make around $300 a year for every $10,000 you deposit. I tend to recommend Roth IRAs more to my clients. It's especially great for first-time investors. It's a retirement account that you can play with where your money is invested and it grows tax free."
Courtesy of Dora Belle
On defining wealth and success:
"Before I give my opinion on this, I encourage everyone to really think about what these words mean to them individually. It's a large sliding scale when we start to ask the question, 'Am I successful and/or wealthy?', and you should not think about anyone but yourself. You're on your own pace. Be kind to yourself but also be realistic.
"Wealth to me is financial freedom. Financial freedom for me is when all of my student loans are paid off, no credit card debt, and I'm paying a mortgage and not rent. Success and wealth are two different ideas for me. I define success as happiness and being grounded in what I do for a living."
On the lowest she’s ever felt when it came to her finances:
"Now looking back, the lowest was [when I was] living check to check. Not having a savings account and waiting on clients to pay me in order to pay my bills for the month. But while it was happening, I was in the midst of the hustle. I never felt any pain. I never felt low. You have to build brick by brick and just keep going."
On how she overcame it:
"By making more money! (Laughs) I work a lot, sometimes from 8am til 11pm every day, but every hour is worth it when I look at my growth as a business owner from Year 1 to now Year 3. I had to take more risks and put myself and my business out there. I now have multiple streams of income and I don't depend on any one client to make ends meet."
On her biggest splurge so far and why she purchased it:
"My biggest splurge since being an entrepreneur was in 2018 when I traveled to 11 cities in Europe over eight weeks. It was my first year as an entrepreneur and I did it only because I could [and] I finally owned all of my time. Looking back, I could have reinvested that money into my business. But then again, the memories I have are irreplaceable."
On whether she’s a spender versus a saver and how she trains herself to save money:
"I'm somewhere in between, but I'm disciplined when I want something. Saving can actually become addicting. Saving my first $1,000 as a self-employed person was one of the hardest things I ever did. I reinvest my earnings as much as possible, but once I saved the first $1,000 dollars, it became addicting to keep seeing the number increase."
"I believe your 30s are for setting up your 40s. Your 40s are for setting up your 50s. You have to invest in yourself first. I think about the type of life I want to live when I'm 40. Or when I have children. So, I'm actively trying to set myself up with residual income."
Courtesy of Dora Belle
On the importance of investing:
"Investing is extremely important. I invest in real estate, art, and stocks. I believe your 30s are for setting up your 40s. Your 40s are for setting up your 50s. You have to invest in yourself first. I think about the type of life I want to live when I'm 40. Or when I have children. So, I'm actively trying to set myself up with residual income.
"I'm in the stage right now ready to purchase my first piece of property and I'm looking for multi-family homes so I can collect rent. The ultimate goal is to make money while I'm sleeping.
"Investing in art is something I highly recommend. You don't need a large budget to start. Start with your local gallery. Go there and jot down some artist names. Go home and research them. Look at their followers and who they're following. You're looking for other artists that they follow, who are just beginning their career. You can buy a piece for $800 sometimes that could be worth thousands of dollars.
"Stocks are the riskiest of the bunch but can turn into a fun hobby for you. It's all based on your taste. Where do you think the economy is moving to? What industry do you think will be next after the economy recovers from the COVID-19 pandemic? You should read articles to research the company and review their financial statements before investing anything. Look at how much debt is sitting on their books. Look at how liquid they are (cash readily available). Research indicators that experts use to determine a company's short-term and long-term growth. But ultimately, it is based on your taste for the company, your preference. It's your money, don't let any one article or anyone tell you how to spend it."
On establishing streams of revenue and her intentions behind it:
"I went to school for accounting. I have my Bachelor's Degree in Accounting and my Master's Degree in Taxation, so my revenue streams range from accounting, tax preparation, tax strategy, and tax audits. I work with companies with $2 million plus in assets and companies who are just beginning with just their savings account and a dream. The intention is to never be broke! (Laughs) I don't ask anyone for anything and I want to keep it that way."
On unhealthy money habits and mindsets:
"When I had a 9-5, I would go out on the weekends and not check my bank account til Monday or worse when I was forced to because I received an alert. I absolutely cannot run my business like that. I have a spreadsheet for my recurring monthly expenses and automated systems that calculate my income for the month. Knowing where you stand as far as your bank account balance and credit score is the most important money lesson I've ever learned. It starts there."
"Knowing where you stand as far as your bank account balance and credit score is the most important money lesson I've ever learned. It starts there."
Courtesy of Dora Belle
On the change she saw once she changed her mindset:
"A savings account was birthed from it. Not living check to check was [also] birthed, and the ability to hire my first employee who works with me all year."
On the craziest thing she’s ever done for money:
"I've never done anything crazy for money. All money is not good money. I left Corporate America because my peace and sanity is more important to me than making money. I decline new clients if my gut tells me my peace is going to be interrupted."
On the money mantra she swears by:
"You can be intimidated to do the work or you can be broke. The work is the research for the things you are curious about that you believe can make you money. We are all intimidated at one time or another when it comes to a new venture. But you have to take risks. You have to execute. You can't want a thing and be afraid of that same thing."
For more of Dora, follow her on Instagram.
Featured image courtesy of Dora Belle
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While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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And what that could mean is there is something going on physically instead of mentally or emotionally. For example, it could be an indication that one or more of your sex hormones are a bit “off” and you need to get them back where they need to be.
That’s the purpose and goal of today’s offering. We’re going to explore how five hormones in your system play a direct role in you having a satisfying sex life, then we’re going to touch on some signs that yours may be low and what you can do about them, at home (although if these don’t work, please see your doctor), if that is indeed the case.
Ready to physically feel like having (more) sex? Awesome.
1. Estrogen
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Although estrogen is found in both men and women, there is a lot more of it in women. And since drops in estrogen can lead to things like a lower sex drive as well as experiencing challenges when it comes to having orgasms, it’s important to do as much as you can to keep your estrogen levels where they need to be at all times.
So, what aresome key indications that your estrogen levels are low? If you have super dry skin; your vagina is dry; you’re storing up more belly fat; your periods are irregular; you’re tired a lot; your sleep patterns are erratic, and/or your libido is low.
And what can you do to get your estrogen levels back on track?
Eat foods that are considered to be phytoestrogens. Phytoestrogens are considered to be plant-based sources of estrogen that could help to get your levels up. Those foods include flaxseeds, peaches, berries, sesame seeds, and cruciferous vegetables (broccoli, cauliflower, cabbage, and collards).
Take Vitamin B-Complex. The reason why it’s important to have vitamin B consistently in your system is because it plays a significant role in how your body creates estrogen. So, if you’re not currently taking a B-complex vitamin, this is as good of a time as any.
Look into Black Cohosh. If you’re someone who likes to take supplements, do some research on black cohosh. It has a pretty good reputation when it comes to elevating estrogen levels.
Drink some black tea. Are you a tea lover? If so, it can’t hurt to sip on some black tea. Although research is still ongoing, there are findings that state that some of the properties in black tea will help to elevate estrogen levels.
Live in moderation. Now this might be your “something new” for the day. Were you aware of the fact that estrogen levels actually increase in body fat? In fact,being underweightis what can decrease your estrogen. While we’re here, exercising too much can jack up your estrogen levels as well. Moral to the story with this one: stay at a healthy weight and don’t overdo it on the workout tip. When it comes to keeping your estrogen levels where they need to be, balance is key.
2. Testosterone
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Testosterone is a hormone that stimulates sexual desire in both menand women, although there is significantly more of it in men.The reason why women need it in their system is not only does it increase their libido, but it also helps to give them energy, to stay in a good mood, and it can also help to make conceiving easier.
How can you know that your testosterone levels could use a boost? If you have an irregular cycle, you’re having trouble conceiving a child; you’re low on energy; your hair is thinning; you’re losing muscle tone; you have trouble sleeping, and/or you have no real interest in sex.
If you happen to notice any of these signs, what can you do to get your testosterone levels up?
Exercise. One way to increase your testosterone levels is to exercise; however, as a woman, the key is to do things like resistance training and High Intensity Interval Training (HIIT). Both of those have the reputation for raising testosterone levels; in women, especially.
Consume more zinc. Although it’s been said for years that zinc deficiencies are directly tied to erectile dysfunction in men, there are also studies that say that many women who are postmenopausal are also low in zinc. In both cases, zinc is needed because it helps to keep hormones in balance. So, if you sense that you may be low in testosterone, perhaps take a zinc supplement or eat foods that are high in zinc, like beef, lamb, pumpkin seeds, whole grains, and eggs.
Drink less alcohol. Even though alcohol can make you feel horny for a moment, the reality is if you drink too much of it, it can actually cause your testosterone levels to tank. Bottom line with this one, pace yourself with your cocktails — especially if you already know that your testosterone levels aren’t where they should be.
Go outside. Did you know that there is a correlation between vitamin D deficiencies and pregnancy issues like preeclampsia and a baby’s low birth weight? There are also studies that indicate that when a woman is receiving a daily dose of vitamin D, her testosterone levels tend to remain strong. That said, one way to get vitamin D into your system is to take a supplement or to eat foods that are rich in them. Another is to consume foods that contain vitamin D, like salmon, tuna, and mushrooms. Still another is to spend more time outside. Definitely one of the best ways to get some “D” into you is to be in the presence of the sun. In fact, as an extra bonus, the ultraviolet radiation that comes from the sun can boost the libido of both men and women. The more you know.
Watch your stress. Two things that aren’t the best of friends are testosterone and cortisol (the hormone that creates your natural stress response). This is so much the case that when your cortisol levels are high, that can hinder your system from producing all of the testosterone that it needs. So, you know what that means, right? CHILL. OUT.
3. Progesterone
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Progesterone is what helps to keep your libido regulated. Since it also plays a pivotal role in a woman’s menstrual cycle and how her hormones respond throughout the month, women who are in the latter stages of perimenopause or who are postmenopausal should also keep their progesterone levels up in order to maintain a consistent sex life.
Signs that you need more progesterone? Trouble sleeping. Irregular cycles. Bloating. Erratic moods. Headaches.
Things that can help bring some relief to these issues?
Meditate. From what I’veread and (briefly) researched, cortisol has the ability to block your progesterone receptors, which means that it can decrease them if you are too stressed out. And that is why one way that you can boost your progesterone levels is to meditate.Since meditation can reduce anxiety, lower stress, and help you to sleep better, I’m sure you get how it can work to get your progesterone levels where they need to be.
Take Vitamin C. If you are low in vitamin C, it could impact your progesterone levels in a negative way. That’s becausevitamin C is a nutrient that actually stimulates the production of progesterone. So, if you want to get more of it into your system, take a vitamin C supplement, drink some orange juice, and/or eatvitamin C-enriched foods like cantaloupe, parsley, strawberries, papaya, and chili peppers.
Implement chasteberry tea. An herbal tea that I personally think every woman should have in her possession ischasteberry tea. Not only does it do things like reduce inflammation, bring relief to PMS symptoms, and help to improve infertility, it also helps to balance out your hormones and, yes, increase progesterone levels.
Hang out with friends. When it comes to raising progesterone levels, something that I found to be fascinating is that there are studies that say that when women hang out with each other, that can give their progesterone levels a boost. The methodology is that it reduces stress and anxiety and makes people feel more comfortable, to the point where it helps to balance out that particular hormone. Pretty cool, right?
Get on a sleep schedule. Not getting a consistent amount (preferably 6-8 hours) of rest can definitelythrow your hormones off, including your progesterone levels. That’s a big part of the reason why I once wrote “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand.” Check it out when you get a chance.
4. Oxytocin
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Oxytocin has the reputation for being called the “love hormone.” That’s because it’s a hormone (and neuropeptide, which is a protein-like molecule) that “activates” during physical activities like kissing, cuddling, andsex.
And what are some telling signs that you are low on this particular hormone?You may feel a bit depressed;you may feel more anxious; you may notice that you don’t want to communicate and/or be affectionate with others; you may have less of an interest in sex, and/or it may be harder for you to orgasm.
Are there also things that you can do to increase your oxytocin levels on your own? Yep.
Get into some music. If you’re not in the mood for sex but you want to be, treat yourself to a long shower — and then sing in it. Believe it or not, some studies say thatsinging for 30 minutes can increase your oxytocin because it helps you to feel connected and relaxed (so can listening to music).
Hug someone. There is data all over the place that says that oxytocin is stimulated through the power of touch. That’s a part of the reason why it’s known as the “cuddle hormone.” So, just like you can get an oxytocin boost by kissing or cuddling with your partner, hugging a friend can also take your oxytocin levels up a few notches as well.
Get a massage. Sooo…when’s the last time you got a massage (check out “12 Different Massage Types. How To Know Which Is Right For You.”)? Take this as a sign that today would be a great day to book an appointment. As far as your oxytocin levels go, it’s another way that touch can come into effect while reducing stress and inflammation. And don’t get me started on where your oxytocin levels will go if your partner starts rubbing on some of your pressure points. Feel me?
Spend quality time with your bae. Speaking of partners, there are studies that also say that oxytocin levels are high when new relationships start. A part of the reason why is that there is so much intentional quality time that’s being spent, which is also good for your oxytocin levels. So, if it’s been a minute since the two of you have been on a date, plan one. Check out “10 Cheap Date Ideas For Couples On A Budget,” “15 Date Ideas Based On Your Love Language,” “10 Romantic Dates You Can Go On (In Your Own Home)” and “Dinner & A Movie Is So…“Meh.” Here Are Some Creative Takes On V-Day Dates.” for some inspiration.
Have sex. As far as physical intimacy goes, it doesn’t get any closer than sex — and here’s the thing: the more orgasms you have, the more oxytocin your body is able to produce. So, if you want more oxytocin and you’re not having (more) sex (and orgasms), that’s actually working against you… especially as far as this particular hormone goes.
5. Dopamine
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Dopamine is a hormone and a neurotransmitter that plays a role in sexual desire and pleasure.For men, it can help them to achieve and maintain an erection;for women, it can help them to orgasm (more easily).
Some indications that you may need more dopamine in your system are if you find yourself lacking drive and motivation, you struggle with concentrating, you’re moody, sleep is a struggle for you, and/or you don’t find things that you used to enjoy being very fun (including sex).
Luckily, there are things that you can even do to level out your dopamine:
Consume more protein. There is an amino acid called tyrosine that helps your body to process dopamine. That’s why it’s a good idea to make sure that protein is a part of your diet. Although you can get it from meat, there are other foods that are packed with protein as well. “Vegetarian Or Vegan? Check Out These High Protein Foods.” has a few ideas for you to consider.
Eat less saturated fat. Speaking of your diet, it’s also wise to eat less saturated fat. That’s because there are studies that say that too much of that kind of fat in your system can mess with how your brain processes dopamine. For the record, saturated fats include dairy, fried foods, and coconut oil.
Maintain a healthy gut. It has been stated that more than 50 percent of the dopamine that’s in your body is synthesized in your gut. This means that you need to be hypervigilant in making sure that your gut remains as healthy as possible. Check out “80% Of Your Immunity Is In Your Gut. Take Care Of It Like This.” for tips on how to do just that.
Take a probiotic. Speaking of maintaining a healthy gut, it’s going to be so much easier for you to do it if you take a probiotic. Plus, probiotics are known for producing the kind of “good bacteria” that makes it easy for your gut to release dopamine.
Try some oregano oil. A supplement that is full of antioxidants and may possibly boost dopamine in your body is oregano oil. Since it also helps to keep your gut healthy — hey, why not give it a shot?
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As you can see, there are so many factors that go into having a happy, healthy, and fulfilling sex life. Now that you know more about what to do for your sex-related hormones, hopefully, you can get more of what you’re looking for in your sexual experiences.
Amen? I’m saying, sis.
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