Settling for a partner who does not reciprocate emotionally, physically, spiritually, and vibrationally is one of the greatest mistakes you could ever make in a relationship.
The reasons for this might seem blatantly obvious, but still, so many people fall victim to a treacherous heart. So many of us have such a strong desire to love and be loved, that we sometimes accept less-than in a partner.
I am no stranger to falling into this downward spiralling pattern, due to heart pangs of wanting to be deeply in love with the wrong person. As a result, it's been one of the most excruciatingly painful heartaches of my life.
This read will list the ways in which you can end up hurting yourself if you settle for a partner who is more interested in a one-sided situationship. There are some really harmful consequences to settling in love, and after reading this list, you'll never want to go halfway with anyone ever again!
No Return On Your Self-Investment
When you make the decision to be with a person who is a lackluster partner, you are automatically setting your self-worth bar too low. If you value what you have to bring to the table emotionally, physically, financially, and energetically, your soul will repel anything that is less than your own worth.
If you value your heart, and respect your body and mind, you will not willingly align with somebody who doesn't deserve everything that you have to offer. Would you invest in a stock that contains less net worth than what you already possess? Of course not! The amount of love and time that you have to invest in someone should be equivalent, if not more, in the heart of your partner.
Your Emotions Will Put In Overtime
When you choose to be with somebody who does not reciprocate respect and general care, you run the risk of emotionally over laboring. You end up going out of your way to meet your partner where they are, even if they never show up.
If you find yourself being a shoulder to cry on, or being an emotional punching bag for a selfish partner, it is very likely that you are over-laboring. Emotional labor requires both parties to put forth the same effort in order to keep a relationship afloat. Don't allow your love for your partner to trick you into doing most of the emotional work for them, thinking that one day you might win them over. You are only draining your energy and wasting your life force on someone who will never step up, and only continue to use you.
You Will Be Your Own Worst Critic
People who consistently vie for the attention of an non-reciprocating other half might wrongfully accept the criticism this person has of them. This is the effect that many narcissists have on their victims. They like to play the blame game, and are emotionally manipulative.They attempt to make you believe that you are the sole source of your relationship problems. Once you start internalizing this false truth, you begin to misplace their criticism on to yourself.
This truly is all a matter of deflection on their part. They are unable to look in the mirror and see where they are falling short, and they divert their own issues by gaslighting their partners.
You'll Become Bitter
There's nothing worse than allowing yourself to become bitter, jealous, or insecure over someone who does not even reciprocate your feelings. You begin to wonder why your partner can't love you like you know they have loved someone else in the past, and completely skip over the great likelihood that they treated the woman before you just as badly. You might even start to question what is wrong with you, which could lead to feelings of inadequacy and self-hate.
When you make these comparisons, you have completely placed your self-worth and validation in somebody else's hands who has absolutely nothing to do with your relationship. This reeks of insecurity and a lack of self-confidence. Never allow anyone else to make you feel resentful of yourself.
You'll Become An Enabler
Becoming an enabler of toxic behaviors and patterns is a direct harmful byproduct of being with someone who doesn't reciprocate. You begin to excuse your partner's nasty habits, inconsiderate behaviors, and abusive treatment. It's as if you have a blind spot for their shenanigans, or you consciously choose not to see them.
You enable this person by choosing not to address negative issues in the relationship, as well as continuously taking them back after they mess up big time. You also might misplace anger on family and friends who try to get you to open your eyes.
Emotional Obligation is Replaced with Temporary Material Satisfaction
Oftentimes when we are in one-sided relationships, the person in question could use material things to temporarily patch things up. This could mean taking you on a little trip, buying you an expensive gift, or treating you to a nice dinner to keep your constant plea for reciprocation and attention at bay.
This manipulation can also come in the form of promises or great sex. Do not allow material things, intimacy, and empty promises to keep you in an unhealthy, and imbalanced bond.
You Can't Let Go
One of the worst, and most detrimental consequences of staying in a non-reciprocating partnership, is that you carry those wounds and insecurities into a new relationship. You may actually run the risk of being so paranoid that a new person in your life will play the same game, that you end up sabotaging the new relationship.
It is not fair to yourself, or someone new in your life, to bring this toxic energy into a budding relationship. Since we often are magnets for people who reflect our issues, if you don't work out your own internal traumas, you will continue to experience similar problems in all of your relationships.
If you have been this person, and are still suffering from some of these harmful effects, it's time to reclaim your self-worth through self-love and positive affirmations. If you must, take a break from dating to learn what unconditional love is for yourself. That is the root of attracting unconditional love back.
Heal your wounds first before expecting to find somebody who is healed and who will reciprocate the love, respect, and vibration that you so very much desire.
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