Here I am. Ready to discuss something that a lot of us think about yet aren't necessarily or entirely comfortable with discussing — the smell of our coochie. First, let me say that anything that has to do with what makes us a woman is something that we should be cool with talking about (straight up). Then let me add that before getting into these 10 points, if you are trying to make your vagina smell like a bed of roses or a fruit basket, that is never gonna happen. The reality is our vaginas house a ton of bacteria — both good and bad. This means that sometimes it's gonna smell a little on the sour side (like tangy-like). Other times, it may smell like a copper penny (like around our periods). Other times, it may mimic molasses; still not a big deal. The main thing to look out for is a fishy odor or an ammonia-like scent. If this is the case, that typically points to an infection of some sort (one you should see your doctor about).
However, if the smell you're currently dealing with is more in the lane of body odor (which usually happens due to a lot of trapped sweat which is why you should almost always wear cotton undies) or one that is just not-so-fresh, I've got a few things that can help to get things back on track, so that you can feel more confident about how things are looking — well, smelling — down below.
1. Balance Your Vagina’s pH
When it comes to this point in particular, I actually just recently wrote an entire article on it. If you check out "Sis, This Is How To Keep Your Vagina's pH Balanced" on our platform, you can learn more about what a pH balance actually is, things that can throw it way off and how to get it "back to the middle" (cue India. Arie). For now, I'll just say that when it comes to keeping your vagina smelling like it's supposed to, a lot of the other "hacks" that I'm about to share wouldn't be all that necessary if your pH level is straight. However, the following nine can play a direct and significant role in helping to make that happen, so let's keep going.
2. Eat Less of Sulfur Foods
Sulfur is interesting in the sense that it's a chemical in your body that helps your system to produce various amino acids. Because of this, it's beneficial in fighting dandruff, relieving allergy-related symptoms, lowering high cholesterol levels, clearing up acne, helping to unclog arteries and so much more. That's the good part. The downside is it can cause your vagina to smell not so great because sulfur has a bit of a bad egg smell due to some of the compounds that it oftentimes contains. For this reason, eating a ton of foods that have sulfur in it could make your vagina smell a little on the unpleasant side. So, if you're a huge fan of stuff like onions, garlic, broccoli, cauliflower, spinach, kale, eggs, walnuts, beef or turkey — while I'm not saying to go without these foods (because they are also really good for you), if you sense that your vagina isn't smelling so great, scale back and see what happens. Less sulfur in your system might just be the key.
3. Consume Kefir
Gee. I wish I had become a fan of kefir a lot earlier in life because, now that it's a part of my diet, I can really tell the difference.
If you're not familiar with what it is, kefir is a fermented food (in drink form) that has the texture and consistency of liquid yogurt yet a probiotic content (two to 10 billion colony-forming units compared to the mere 50 million that's in yogurt) that is totally off of the chain. This is good to know because, within your vagina, there is both good and bad bacteria. When the bad bacteria takes over, not only can that result in irritating health issues like a yeast infection, it can also cause odors from that area to arise.
So, whether you choose to drink kefir straight or do something like pour it into a smoothie, try and add it to your regimen. Like I said, I have and have absolutely no regrets.
4. Snack on Pineapples and Watermelon
Speaking of consuming things that will make your vagina smell better, anything that will help to give your immune system a boost is always a good idea — including foods that are loaded with Vitamin C. The reason why I specifically listed pineapple and watermelon here is because they both are great at promoting gut health (which also helps your vagina to smell good and healthy). Also, while your vagina will never taste like a pint of ice cream (it wasn't designed to), the extra antioxidants in both of these fruits can help it seem, just a little bit on the sweeter side.
5. Take a Neem Oil Supplement
Something else that you might want to consider doing is taking a neem oil supplement.
Neem is a natural herb that has some pretty potent antifungal, antiviral and antibacterial properties in it. This is good to know because, when it comes to your vagina, not only can it help to speed up the healing process of STDs such as gonorrhea, chlamydia and herpes (it doesn't replace antibiotics, it just helps your system to recover faster), it can also help to protect vaginal infections from occurring — ones that could result in your vagina being not so fresh.
While some people like to soak in neem leaves or drink it in tea form, another route is to take a neem oil supplement. As a bonus, the fatty acids in it can help your skin to glow as it fights aging signs.
6. Use a Menstrual Cup
Although I used to wear them in college and a part of my 20s, on this side of wisdom, I'm not a fan of tampons. Like my mother used to oftentimes say, "that blood is designed to flow out". Indeed. As far as pads go, besides all of those fibers not being the best for the environment, they can actually be the cause of vaginal odor during our cycle. While I was in my 40s before I got a hold of a menstrual cup, it really has been life-changing for me. It's comfortable. There's far less leaking. And I don't smell a thing. So, if you've yet to try one, maybe this will be the lil' push that you need to at least give one a try. (By the way, if you have a high cervix like I do, the one that I adore on a whole 'nother level is the INTIMINA Lily Cup. Thank me later.)
7. Drink Mint Water
Something that your vagina is full of is mucous membranes. Basically, they provide a protective fluid inside of your vagina. In order for them to function properly, you need to consume the standard 6-8 glasses of water on a daily basis. If you really want to be intentional about your vagina smelling good, add some fresh mint to your glass. Mint contains antibacterial properties that reduce bacteria all throughout your system, your vagina included. Mint is also high in fiber which helps to keep you regular which helps to keep toxins out of your system — which is always good when you want to smell great in your nether regions.
8. Put Apple Cider Vinegar and Baking Soda into Your Bathwater
Something that I personally think kinda sucks yet "such is life" is the fact that hot showers and baths have a tendency to throw our pH balance off. So, what temp should your water be? From what I've researched, it needs to be just a tad above your normal body temperature which puts it at around 90° F and 105° F (32° C – 40° C). Anyway, on the days when you want to take a long soak (check out "Did You Know There's A Right & A Wrong Way To Take A Bath?"), it can't hurt to pour a cup of apple cider vinegar (the kind with the mother) and a half cup of baking soda into your tub. The antibacterial and antiseptic properties in the vinegar will flush out toxins and remove bacteria from your vagina (and vulva) while the baking soda will help to deodorize your genitals. For the record, you don't need to do this every time. Just when you notice that your vagina is a little "too tart" smelling, your vagina/vulva is irritated or you want to feel a little extra fresh.
9. Make a Peppermint or Oregano Oil Spray
Oregano is an herb that derives from the mint family. As far as your vaginal health is concerned, some people use it as a way to fight the overgrowth of candida; that's because it contains really potent antibacterial properties, the kind that fight "bad bacteria". That's why you might want to also make an oregano spray out of distilled water and pure oregano oil. Just fill a small spray bottle up and add 10 drops of oregano oil. If you're about to go work out, spray a bit of the combo onto your pubic mound (not directly into your vagina). It can fight odor-causing bacteria so that odors won't arise.
10. Practice Proper After-Sex Protocol
Sperm/semen can throw your vagina's pH levels way off which can also result in your vagina not smelling too awesome. That's just one more reason to go with a condom when you're getting it in (check out "10 Things You Should DEFINITELY Know About Condoms" and "10 Ways To Make Using A Condom So Much More Pleasurable"). Yet if that's not how you get down, while it might seem all romantic 'n stuff to lay up with your partner for hours after climaxing (I mean, here's hoping, right?), it really is a good idea to follow a bit of an after-sex protocol which includes peeing right after sex and taking a bath, if you can.
An article that I wrote for the platform entitled, "Here's How To Care For Your Vagina AFTER Sex" can give you a play by play breakdown. I mean, it's not like he can't join you in the water if you want (check out "So, This Is How To Make Shower Sex So Much Better"). That way, you can get a 2-for-1 deal — another round and a healthy va-jay-jay. Simultaneously. Dope.
To learn more about all things vaginal health and wellness, check out the xoNecole Women's Health section here.
Featured image by Getty Images
- Treat Chronic BV - Bacterial Vaginosis - Holistic Health - xoNecole ... ›
- Best DIY Feminine Wash, Vaginal Wash Recipes - xoNecole ... ›
- Foods That Keep Your Vagina Smelling Right - xoNecole: Women's ... ›
- How To Make Your Vagina Taste Sweeter - xoNecole: Women's ... ›
- 10 Ways Vaginas Change As You Age - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Reset Your Relationship: How To Start 2025 Strong With Your Partner
As the calendar turns and a new year unfolds, many of us are laser-focused on our career goals, fitness resolutions, and vision boards that outline the journey to our best selves. But amidst all the planning and self-improvement, have you made room for another important part of your life? Your relationship.
It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Step 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Step 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
Step 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
Your Guide To Letting Go Of What No Longer Serves You Based On Astrology
Letting go is a gift we are given and a strength that we find throughout our lives. There are times when we want to grab ahold of what we are experiencing and sensing, and times when we need to let go of something that was once everything to us or what we wanted for ourselves. The moment you conclude that you need to let something go in your life is the moment that your brain fights to make that happen for you.
In Astrology, there is an area of your birth chart that is designed for you to understand where you will be letting go a lot in this lifetime, and exactly how to do so. We dive through the birth chart as we seek a deeper understanding of ourselves and let go of what no longer serves us, and there are tools available to help us do so. If you don't know where your South Node is in your birth chart, you can use a free calculator like this one here.
What Does Your South Node Represent in Astrology?
When it comes to what we are destined to let go of or move away from in this lifetime, we look to the South Node. The South Node is the area of your birth chart that has to do with your past lives, karma, lessons, old habits and traits, gifts, and energy you are moving away from in this lifetime.
Your South Node is opposite your North Node, which is your destiny and the energy you want to move towards.
We can learn a lot from our South Node and it’s an area of our life where we tend to gain the most wisdom. By understanding why some patterns in your life tend to play out in the same ways, you can be more conscious of the choices you make in the now and let go of who and what doesn’t serve you in the process.
South Node Insights: Letting Go
The South Node is our natural gifts and talents, but also where we don’t need to focus so much of our energy on, taking us away from where we need to be developing, which is the North Node. So when you are looking to let go of something, gain a new perspective, or feel more trusting in what you are doing right now, you can examine your South Node.
We learn from our South Node by not making the same mistakes over again, letting go of what needs to be let go of, and understanding what we need in order to create space for our new beginning.
Read below for your South Node on how to let go of what no longer serves you.
Aries South Node: Letting Go of Independence for Connection
You are used to being independent and figuring things out on your own. In this lifetime, however, you are being asked to lean on others for support when you need it. You are working on letting go of the ego and focusing more on the heart. By extending your compassion for others, you discover a part of yourself that leads you toward empowerment and allows you to let go of a false sense of safety.
You are meant to experience harmonious, fortunate, and compatible love in this lifetime, and you will do so by opening your heart to others and letting go of people who don’t support you or whom you can’t count on.
Taurus South Node: Releasing Overdependence and Superficiality
With your South Node in Taurus, you are letting go of the need to acquire by focusing on the depth and intention of what you are obtaining. Your relationships tend to have a lot to do with your financial world, and these things can get twisted and distorted if you are not being careful.
In this lifetime, you are working on letting go of what doesn’t serve you by following your heart and your intuition more and focusing more on the feeling you want for yourself rather than the things themselves. You are also working on letting go of overdependence or superficiality in relationships, by connecting with the people whom you have a deep and spiritual bond with.
Gemini South Node: Finding Freedom in Authenticity
For you, letting go means following your freedom. You are meant to do things your own way in this lifetime, and the less you can focus on how you are going to be perceived, the more you can live the life of your dreams. With a South Node in Gemini, you are moving away from the commotion of life. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is traveling, getting out of your comfort zone, and being in new environments.
In past lives, you may have given too much of your focus on your social successes and business pursuits, and in this lifetime, you are meant to focus on the bigger picture. What helps you let go is understanding that once you do, better is available to you.
Cancer South Node: Trusting Yourself Beyond Emotional Impulses
With a South Node in Cancer, you are learning to trust yourself and your logic more than your emotional world in this lifetime. By letting go of feeling like you have to be the one to nurture and support everyone and allowing people to do that for you, you lead your destiny.
With your South Node in Cancer, you are letting go of emotional impulsiveness or making decisions irrationally before you have thought about them.
In past lives, you were led by your emotional world, and in this lifetime, you are meant to think more about your long-term goals and intentions. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is knowing that you are more than what you can give to others.
Leo South Node: Prioritizing Community Over Recognition
In this lifetime, you are working on letting go of the need to be seen and recognized and focus more on your need for community and soul companionship. You are moving away from the “I” and moving closer to the “We.” What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is giving your focus to humanity, the progress you want to make in this lifetime, and who you want to make it with.
You are learning how to work with others and let go of the need to figure everything out yourself. The more you connect with the people who make you want to team up and form a relationship, rather than the people who make you want to be alone, the better for you.
Virgo South Node: Embracing Compassion Over Perfection
In this lifetime, you are letting go of the need to do everything yourself and to have everything all together. You can let go of what no longer serves you by thinking more with your heart than you do with your mind and by trusting this gift of yours. By focusing more on your spirituality, emotional connections, and creativity, you let go of a timid side of you that can disrupt your relationships or the bonds you make.
In past lifetimes, you were focused on perfection. In this lifetime, you are meant to focus on compassion. By surrendering more to the flow of things, you can let go of what no longer serves you while remaining open for what does.
Libra South Node: Rediscovering Your Independence
With your South Node in Libra, you are meant to experience the gifts of independence, freedom, and inner clarity in this lifetime. In the past, you may have been more dependent on the people around you and made a lot of your focus on love. However, in this lifetime, you are being reminded to not lose your identity in others. You can let go of what no longer serves you by only moving towards the things that feel authentic to you.
You are meant to feel confident, inspired, and free in your relationships, and if you don’t feel this way, then that is a sign you are around energy that doesn’t serve you. You are meant to do things your own way in this lifetime.
Scorpio South Node: Letting Go of Struggles and Embracing Ease
With your South Node in Scorpio, you have lived many lives and have experienced a lot emotionally. In this lifetime, you are learning how to trust the process more and to understand that not everything has to be difficult or trying for you. You can experience great things with ease, and you’ll know you are in the right place when things are just falling into your lap.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is focusing more on the things and people who make you feel safe, stable, and comfortable. Instead of always seeking the rush or the thrill, bring your attention more towards the things that ground you.
Sagittarius South Node: Building Connection Through Learning
Your South Node in Sagittarius urges you towards connection with your community and your immediate environment. In this lifetime, you are letting go of the need to be everywhere at once, rather than with the people who matter most to you. You are moving away from knowing everything and into learning everything.
By looking at life as a place where you will learn, grow, and connect, you can let go of the things that stretch you too thin or don’t serve your heart.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is expressing yourself more, meeting new people, and spending time on a cause or creative project that inspires you.
Capricorn South Node: Choosing Home and Foundations Over Status
In this lifetime, you are meant to put more value and effort into your personal life, home, family, and foundations in life. In past lifetimes, a lot of your focus was on your reputation, achievements, and successes, and in this lifetime, you are meant to bring your energy more to the home base, family, and stability in life.
You will know if something is right for you if you want it because it makes you feel safe and nurtured, rather than just something that looks pleasing to the eye. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is by focusing more on your personal life rather than your public, and what you truly see for yourself here.
Aquarius South Node: Shining in Your Individuality
With an Aquarius South Node, you are meant to shine, be seen, and express yourself in this lifetime. You are letting go of the lone wolf energy you are used to, and working on taking up space. You are able to let go of what no longer serves you by being confident in yourself and the decisions you are making.
If someone doesn’t make you feel like the best thing in the entire world, then they aren’t right for you. In past lifetimes, you gave a lot of your energy to your community and the people around you, and in this lifetime, you are meant to focus on yourself and your path more. It’s all about doing what makes you feel good and trusting that you deserve to.
Pisces South Node: Honoring Logic While Embracing Intuition
Your lesson in this lifetime is that your mind is your gift. In past lives, you were very intuitive, psychic, and spiritual, and in this lifetime, you are learning to trust and honor the logical part of yourself more. You may tend to put your all into your relationships and not get the same energy back, and you are working on taking care of yourself first before you can give to another.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is trusting your body and the signals it gives you when you are around certain people or energy that doesn’t serve. Get organized, figure out your needs, boundaries, and wants, and get clear on who you are and what you want for yourself.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Guido Mieth/Getty Images