

Getting into the business of freelancing has become sexier than ever because it comes with the idea that you get to be your own boss. Social media paints the picture that once you become a freelancer, there's no more clocking in and out of the office, being micromanaged by some control-freak, or rushing to get out of the office to make happy hour with your girls. On top of all of this, you get to work literally from wherever you want in the world (oh hey Bali, oh hey Jamaica), and look cute on Insta while doing it.
Being a freelancer, you are the master of your own fate, the ultimate girlboss - OR at least that's what you think.
While being a freelancer does come with many benefits (yes, often you can work from wherever and be in control of your own schedule), the rewards comes with many risks and hard work.
Before you decide to become a freelancer, here are four women who share the top things that they wish someone would've told them about freelancing, and the things you should know before you become one.
Dalila Thomas
Freelance PR Agent, Journalist, and Founder of Starving on a Budget
On being a freelance writer:
Negotiate.
"This is something that many can expect goes without saying, however there are plenty of writers - honestly professionals of all sorts - that still don't negotiate pay. That's a no-no. If you've gotten to a point with a potential employer that you're in a room/on the phone/Skyping/etc. discussing pay, it means they want what you have to offer. If they see the value in you, you should be able to come to an agreement regarding your compensation. If not, it wasn't meant to be."
Plan.
"If you're freelancing full-time, it's very likely you'll be working on multiple pieces/projects at one time. While it may be tempting to take on a much as possible, be mindful - and realistic - about how much you can handle. When you compromise yourself, you compromise that quality of your work. Another important thing is planning out your pay. Knowing when you will get paid is crucial to your livelihood. Some publications allow you to submit an invoice immediately, others may pay you months later after the piece is published."
Know the rules.
"If you're freelancing with multiple publications and writing about similar subjects, make sure you're following rules laid out in any agreement/contract you sign. Many publications won't allow you to write about the same subject/subject matter for other publications until a certain amount of time has passed."
Follow her on Instagram.
Trina J.
Freelance Fitness Trainer
On being a freelance fitness trainer:
Don't be scared to talk about what you do.
"Work your network, ask for referrals from friends and even from your social media network."
Don't just post progress pics.
"Be relevant, provide value fitness content and tips on and off line to gain credibility and expand your reach."
Think outside of Instagram.
"Use LinkedIn. A lot of professionals in my industry ignore this platform. LinkedIn is where the professionals live that see the value in working with a trainer. Be relevant in this space, engage with people and work your connections."
Follow her on Instagram.
Quiana Darden
Freelance Content Marketing Writer
On being in the content business:
Never stop working on you.
"It takes a lot more than being an excellent writer to be a successful freelance writer. Between organizing projects, meeting deadlines, communicating with clients, and reaching out to potential clients to find new business, you have to ensure that your other skills are refined as well.
"You should always be a student. Maybe it's because I used to be a teacher, but I love learning how to improve both my writing and my business as a whole. Whether you invest in reading books, listening to podcasts, taking courses, attending conferences, or hiring a coach, you should always be learning about how to improve your writing skills and your business skills. There are tons of fantastic resources out there for you to take advantage of, no matter your budget."
Always keep the money on your mind.
"Run your business like a business. It's easy to find and accept writing jobs, but are they helping you reach your revenue goals? If you're taking on very low-level assignments that pay you next to nothing, yet you're trying to scale your business, you will struggle. Know your annual, quarterly, and monthly revenue goals. Know your required hourly rate and ensure that the projects you take on are pushing you towards reaching your overall business goals. That's the only way you will grow and sustain your business."
Follow her on Instagram.
Ashley Janelle
Freelance User Experience Design Coach
On getting clients as a freelancer in tech:
Be a boss in every area of your business.
"Do great work, be on time, and stay professional at all times. Many of the clients I get are from referrals, so it's really important to always put your best foot forward. Also, make sure you have a system in place for getting clients. When you have a client, you should always be looking for your next client so never get complacent."
Follow her on Instagram.
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Adrian Marcel On Purpose, Sacrifice, And The 'Signs Of Life'
In this week's episode of xoMAN, host Kiara Walker talked with R&B artist Adrian Marcel, who opened up, full of heart and authenticity, about his personal evolution. He discussed his days transitioning from a young Bay Area singer on the come-up to becoming a grounded husband and father of four.
With honesty and introspection, Marcel reflected on how life, love, and loss have shaped the man he is today.
On ‘Life’s Subtle Signals’
Much of the conversation centered around purpose, sacrifice, and listening to life’s subtle signals. “I think that you really have to pay attention to the signs of life,” Marcel said. “Because as much as we need to make money, we are not necessarily on this Earth for that sole purpose, you know what I mean?” While he acknowledged his ambitions, adding, “that is not me saying at all I’m not trying to ball out,” he emphasized that fulfillment goes deeper.
“We are here to be happy. We are here [to] fulfill a purpose that we are put on here for.”
On Passion vs. Survival
Adrian spoke candidly about the tension between passion and survival, describing how hardship can sometimes point us away from misaligned paths. “If you find it’s constantly hurting you… that’s telling you something. That’s telling you that you’re going outside of your purpose.”
Marcel’s path hasn’t been without detours. A promising athlete in his youth, he recalled, “Early on in my career, I was still doing sports… I was good… I had a scholarship.” An injury changed everything. “My femur broke. Hence why I always say, you know, I’m gonna keep you hip like a femur.” After the injury, he pivoted to explore other careers, including teaching and corporate jobs.
“It just did not get me—even with any success that happened in anything—those times, back then, I was so unhappy. And you know, to a different degree. Like not just like, ‘I really want to be a singer so that’s why I’m unhappy.’ Nah, it was like, it was not fulfilling me in any form or fashion.”
On Connection Between Pursuing Music & Fatherhood
He recalled performing old-school songs at age 12 to impress girls, then his father challenged him: “You can lie to these girls all you want, but you're really just lying to yourself. You ain't growing.” That push led him to the piano—and eventually, to his truth. “Music is my love,” Marcel affirmed. “I wouldn’t be a happy husband if I was here trying to do anything else just to appease her [his wife].”
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by xoNecole/YouTube
Colman Domingo’s Career Advice Is A Reminder That Our Words Shape Our Reality
When it comes to life, we are always here for a good reminder to shift our mindsets, and Colman Domingo just gave us one we didn't know we needed.
In a resurfaced clip from an appearance at NewFest shared as a repost via Micheaux Film Festival, the Emmy award winner dropped a gem on how he has navigated his decades-spanning career in Hollywood. The gem in question? Well, Colman has never identified with "struggle" in his career. Let that sit.
Colman Domingo On Not Claiming Struggle
"I’ve never said that this career was tough. I’ve never said it was difficult. I’ve never said it was hard," Colman said. "Other people would say that—‘oh, you're in a very difficult industry. It's very hard to get work and book work.’ I’m like, I’ve never believed that."
Instead of allowing himself to be defined by other people's projections about their perceptions of what the industry is or was, Colman dared to believe differently even if his reality was playing catch up with his dreams:
"Like Maya Angelou said words are things. And if you believe that, then that's actually what it is. Actually I've just never believed it. Someone told me some years ago, they said, 'I remember you were, you're a struggling actor.' I'm like, 'I don't.'"
"I wasn't attached to a struggle. I was attached to living..."
He continued:
"Even when I was bartending and hustling and not having opportunities or anything, I never believed that I was struggling because I wasn't attached to a struggle. I was attached to living and creating and being curious."
Colman’s philosophy of attaching to living instead of struggle has blossomed into an enduring career. He first made his mark on stage in acclaimed Broadway productions before transitioning to the screen, where his star began to rise in the 2010s following his role as Victor Strand in Fear The Walking Dead. From there, his presence only grew, landing memorable supporting roles in If Beale Street Could Talk, Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom, and the hit series Euphoria.
In more recent years, Colman has stepped fully into the spotlight with standout leading performances in Rustin and Sing Sing, both of which earned him widespread critical acclaim and Academy Award nominations for Best Actor.
With all that said, Colman's advice is no doubt powerful, especially for those who are chasing their dreams, building something from the ground up, or have question marks about what's next in their careers. Words shape our realities, and how we speak about our journeys even in passing matters.
Words Create Our Reality & Colman Is Living Proof
"I tell young people that. To remember the words that you say about yourself and your career are true. So, I choose to make it full of light and love and it's interesting and every day I'm going to learn something new even if it looks like I don't have what I want but it's important to be in the moment... you really build on the moments moment to moment.
"And you're looking back at your career as I've been in it for what 33 years and you're like, 'Wow, that's what I've been doing.' And I've stayed strong to that so I think that is truly my advice."
Let this be your sign to give your path a reframe. When the path you're on feels uncertain, the journey is still unfolding. Like Colman said: "I wasn't attached to a struggle. I was attached to living."
That's a Black king right there.
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Featured image by Soul Brother/Soul B Photos/Shutterstock