

3 Ways To Turn Up The Heat On Your Fresh-Faced Makeup Look
Summer makeup is synonymous with clean, glowing, sun-kissed, and healthy skin. We are here to remind you that you can still make a statement out in the sun, all while combating the summer heat.
If you're looking to spice up your makeup routine, start with these 3 fresh summer beauty looks to rock all season long.
Golden Girl
McKenzie Renae for xoNecole
(pictured: Fenty Beauty Killawatt Highlighter in "Trophy Wife", NARS Blush in "Orgasm", Becca Glow Gloss in "Metamorphic Gold")
One way to create a fresh twist on a barely-there makeup look is to add a dash of gold in all the right places. Lightly dust and highlight the areas of the face where the sunlight naturally hits. This includes your temple and high cheekbone, bridge of the nose, under the arch of your brow, and cupids bow. If your skin is on the oilier side, use a mattifying primer prior to applying foundation. Another tip is to lightly apply a translucent powder on the areas of your face that are prone to oil buildup before applying your gold highlight.
Don't forget the rest of your body, sis. Take a body brush and sweep gold highlighter on the tops of your shoulders and décolletage straight from the palette or mix it in with your favorite lotion for a more subdued effect.
Juicy Lips
McKenzie Renae for xoNecole
(pictured: Maybelline ColorSensational Vivid Lipstick in "885 Vibrant Mandarin", and Urban Decay Hi-Fi Shine Ultra Cushion Lipgloss in "Snitch")
I think we can all agree that ultra-glossy lips have made a comeback this summer. Give your mattes a rest and reach for a bold juicy hue instead. Orange, melons, and pinks are always a great place to start for your pout. But if you care to reach for a shade of lilac to liven things up, go for it girl. The key to a juicy pout is exfoliated, moisturized lips. Take the time to gently exfoliate, then apply a light balm.
Take your fingers and gently press the balm into the lip so your lipstick doesn't slide around and swipes on effortlessly. Top your pout with a glossy gloss and get ready to hit the town with your favorite summer drink in tow.
Electric Liner
McKenzie Renae for xoNecole
(pictured: BlackUp Matte Waterproof Liquid Eyeliner in "ELM05", NARS Satin Lip Pencil in "Giusti, NARS Oil Infused Lip Tint in "Orgasm")
A cat eye has always been a classic beauty look. Turn things up a few notches by lining your lids in an electric-colored hue. Cobalt blue, neon green, vibrant yellow, electric orange and stark white are all hot options to rock this summer. If you've got a steady hand, pick up a liquid liner pen; but if you need a little more help with precision, opt for an angled brush to dip into your pigment and take your time. Finish the look off with a soft pink or nude glossy lip that doesn't take the attention away from your colorful wing.
Tell us below, which look are you planning to try this summer?
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Black women are not a monolith. We all are deserving of healing and wholeness despite what we've been through, how much money we have in the bank, or what we look like. Most importantly, we are enough—even when we are not working, earning, or serving.
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From Monogamy To Polyamory: 'I'm In An Asexual Poly Marriage With My Husband Of 7 Years'
Have you ever wondered what it's like to be asexual and in an open marriage? Relationship Coach Mikki Bey shared her first-hand experience with us as well as answered some of our burning questions.
Like a lot of people, Mikki met her now husband, Raheem Ali, online. As soon as they met, they instantly fell in love and got engaged on their first date. Just 90 days after they met, the couple tied the knot and have now been married for seven years. Raheem and Mikki aren’t your typical married couple, and despite being married for almost a decade, their marriage is anything but traditional. Mikki and Raheem have what she calls an "asexual polyamorous marriage."
Defining Her Sexuality
It wasn't until last summer that Mikki found the language to define her sexuality. "I didn't have the language for it until last summer," she explained to xoNecole. "Looking back, I just thought sex wasn't my thing. It was never enjoyable for me, and I'd go years without even noticing.”
Mikki always thought she was broken because she had no interest in sex. Mikki noticed after her friends came to visit and started discussing their sexual fantasies that she realized something was different about her. “At that point, I knew something was definitely different about me since I do not have sexual fantasies at all. It was truly news to me that people are at work thinking about sex! That was not my experience.” This led to Mikki researching asexuality, which she soon realized fit her to a T. “It felt like breathing new air when I was able to call it by name," said Mikki.
"Looking back, I just thought sex wasn't my thing. It was never enjoyable for me, and I'd go years without even noticing it."
Asexuality refers to people who experience little or no sexual attraction, experience attraction without acting on it sexually, or experience sexual attraction differently based on other factors. Like most things, asexuality falls on a spectrum and encompasses many other identities. It's important to remember, however, that attraction and action are not always synonymous: some asexuals may reject the idea of sexual contact, but others may be sex-neutral and engage in sexual activity.
It's possible that some asexuals will have sex with someone else despite not having a libido or masturbating, but others will have sex with a partner because it brings a sense of connection.
From a Traditional Marriage to Kitchen Table Polyamory
Although Mikki never really had a high sex drive, it wasn’t until after the birth of her son, that she noticed her sex drive took a real nosedive. “I never had a high sex drive, but about a year after my son was born, I realized I had zero desire. My husband has a high sex drive, and I knew that it would not be sustainable to not have sex in our marriage at that time.”
She was determined to find an alternative to divorce and stumbled upon a polyamory conversation on Clubhouse. Upon doing her own research, she brought up the idea to their husband, who was receptive. “It’s so interesting to me that people weigh sex so heavily in relationships when even if you are having a ton of sex, it’s still a very small percentage of the relationship activity," Mikki shared.
They chose polyamory because Mikki still wanted to be married, but she also wanted to make sure that Raheem was getting his individual needs and desires met, even if that meant meeting them with someone else. “I think that we have been programmed to think that our spouses need to be our 'everything.' We do not operate like that. There is no one way that fits all when it comes to relationships, despite what society may try to tell you. Their path to doing this thing called life together may be different from yours, but they found what works for them. We have chosen to design a marriage that works for us,” Mikki explained.
"We have chosen to design a marriage that works for us. We both consent to each of us having everything from casual sex partners to lifetime partners if it should go there. We believe love is abundant and do not limit ourselves or each other on how we express it."
She continued, “We both consent to each of us having everything from casual sexual partners to lifetime partners if it should get there. We believe love is abundant and do not limit ourselves or each other on how we express it. Our dynamic is parallel with kitchen table poly aspirations.”
Kitchen table polyamory (KTP) is a polyamorous relationship in which all participants are on friendly terms enough to share a meal at the kitchen table. Basically, it means you have some form of relationship with your partner’s other partner, whether as a group or individually. A lot of times, KTP relationships are highly personal and rooted in mutual respect, communication, and friendship.
Intimacy in an Asexual Polyamorous Marriage
Mikki says she and her husband, Raheem, still share intimate moments despite being in a polyamorous marriage. “Our intimacy is emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and physical, although non-sexual. We are intentional about date nights weekly, surprising and delighting each other daily, and most of all, we communicate our needs regularly. In my opinion, our intimacy is top-tier! I give my husband full-body massages, mani-pedis and make sure I am giving him small physical touches/kisses throughout the day. He is also very intentional about showing me his love and affection.”
Raheem and Mikki now use their lives as examples for others. On their website, thepolycouplenextdoor.com, they coach people interested in learning how to be consensually non-monogamous. “We are both relationship coaches. I specialized in emotional regulation, and Raheem specializes in communication and conflict resolution. The same tools we use in our marriage help our clients succeed in polyamory."
Mikki advises people who may be asexual or seeking non-monogamy to communicate their needs openly and to consider seeking sex therapy or intimacy coaching. Building a strong relationship with a non-sexual partner requires both empathy and compassion.
For more of Mikki, follow her on Instagram @getmikkibey. Follow the couple's platform on Instagram @thepolycouplenextdoor.
Featured image by skynesher/Getty Images