Some STIs Can Lie Dormant In Your System. Here's Why That Matters.

When It Comes to STIs/STDs, What Does “Dormant” Mean?

So, let’s get right into it. When it comes to STIs/STDs, when they are lying dormant in your system, what that basically means is they’re in your body without posing any symptoms. How does this happen? Well, STIs/STDs have incubation periods; sometimes they can last for a few days, sometimes a few months, and yep, some can take a few years (I actually recently read that herpes can be dormant in one’s body for several decades; no joke).

This means that while you’re out here thinking that you are fine, just because you don’t have any symptoms, you could be carrying the infection around and actually expose your partner(s), who could end up with the illness and the symptoms.

If you just read all of what I just said and thought, “I mean, a few days or months makes sense, but years?” — first, remember my own story that I just shared with you, then check out which infections apply:

• Again, herpes can lie dormant for 30+ years
• Syphilis can lie dormant for 30+ years
• HIV can lie dormant for 10+ years
• HPV can lie dormant for…who knows how long?

And just what determines how long an infection can remain “asleep” or “inactive?” Well, like I said earlier, immunity is one factor. Another is your age because, as you get older, your system is not as resilient as it tends to be when you are younger (which could explain articles like “Single boomers are having 'S-E-X.' They're also seeing a surge in STIs”). Some other things to take into account are if you have a particular kind of strain of the infection (which you can’t Google to find out; only your physician can tell you).

And here’s the thing: if you do happen to have one of these infections and you are asymptomatic, that doesn’t mean that you can’t end up with infertility issues, that you won’t make your body more susceptible to certain types of cancer (including your throat and genitalia) and/or that you aren’t now more vulnerable to HIV. See how serious all of this is?

Have mercy. See why wearing condoms, each and every time, and getting tested (annually if you have one partner and they only have you as one too and every 3-6 months if you have multiples) is paramount? Especially since it continues to be reported that only one-third of men and one-fourth of women actually use rubbers and (goodness children) one-third of 15-YEAR-OLDS don’t use protection of any form (condoms or the pill).

Yep, everyone should know about this kind of information…as soon as possible too.

Can You Test Negative and Still Have an STI/STD?

Okay, but what if you read all of this (thus far) and thought to yourself, “I get tested, I’m good.” I mean, if you don’t use condoms — maybe, maybe not. The reason why I say that is because there is such a thing as getting a false negative on an STI/STD test result. This happens because, although most reputable tests are pretty accurate, they aren’t 100 percent and so yes, there is a chance that you could take a test and the result not be what it (initially) says that it is.

This typically happens if you think you’ve been exposed to an infection and you test too soon — because, again, each infection has its own incubation period. For instance, chlamydia typically needs an incubation time of 7-21 days, gonorrhea needs 1-14 days, trichomoniasis needs 5-28 days, genital herpes needs 2-12 days, and genital warts? Well, its incubation period could take months if not years. Hmph.

To me, the biggest takeaway from this point is if you take a test right after you think you’ve been exposed to an infection and the results are negative, you should take another within a couple of weeks, just to be sure. Then maybe again in a few months, to be extra sure.

Let’s continue.

What If You Test Positive and Your Partner Tests Negative (or Vice Versa)?

Aight, because STIs/STDs are not as “simple” or “black and white” as you might’ve been led to believe before reading all of this, that’s why you can’t just assume that if you test positive and your partner tests negative, or if it’s the other way around, that the one who isn’t infected won’t end up becoming that way later on — because again, a dormant infection is real out in these streets.

It also should go on record that depending on how long you’ve been with someone, it’s not exactly fair to automatically assume that they’ve sexually been with someone other than you because again…dormancy can last for months or years. Take chlamydia, for example. Although it is indeed a highly contagious infection, back when I found out that I had it, my boyfriend at the time didn’t (including while having sex with me) — and we weren’t always using condoms. How could this be?

Well, one article that I read said that the ratio of it being transmitted from partner, by gender, is “male to female: 32.1% and 34.9%” and “female to male: 21.4% and 4.6%”; in other words, it’s not a given that “the carrier” will pass chlamydia along to their partner. Moving on, I also know a guy (who actually pisses me off when it comes to this) who has herpes and doesn’t always use a condom.

In his eyes, since he takes his meds daily and avoids sex during breakouts, there is no need — to use condoms or to tell his partners. HOW SELFISH IS THAT (and yes, I am yelling it!). Even at the slightest inkling of an outbreak, herpes is too contagious (including via oral sex) to be playing those types of games — especially since it continues to have no cure.

The lesson here? Whoever has an infection while their partner doesn’t, mutual testing still needs to transpire, and condoms definitely need to be used until the one with the infection has taken their meds, and then they have tested negative. And honestly, for the next few weeks, condoms still should be used until both individuals have tested again and have a negative result — both ways.

What Can You Do to Avoid the Fear of Having a Dormant STI/STD?

Y’all, the fact that 75 percent of women and 50 percent of men can have chlamydia without any symptoms is enough of a reason to use rubbers and stay getting tested. Goodness. However, as I wind all of this up, as concerning as all of this intel is, it’s not like you just have to — pardon the pun — lie down and take it. There are always preventative measures that can be taken to significantly decrease your chances of ending up with an STI/STD — dormant or not.

Choose your partners carefully. Sex is an act that can get you sick and/or make a human. This means that it’s never as casual as our culture makes it out to be. Take your time. Have sex deal-breakers. If you sense red flags…heed them.

USE. CONDOMS. When used correctly, they are 98 percent effective at preventing pregnancy and 95 percent effective at preventing STIs/STDs. If you avoid them because you don’t like how they feel, I’ve got some hacks for that here: “10 Ways To Make Using A Condom So Much More Pleasurable.” If you do avoid condoms, remember that since they can help to keep you healthy, there really should be no excuse to go without them. Period.

Don’t just get tested; require that your partner be tested too. Real life ain’t no rom-com or soap opera, so let’s not do the “But he’s so fine” or “I’m not comfortable bringing it up” thing when it comes to making sure that your partner (especially if he’s new) has been recently tested — like within the past six months and has his results to prove it.

Listen, if he’s not comfortable talking about this with you, you shouldn’t be comfortable letting any body part of his inside of yours. Straight up.

Remember that some vaccinations are available. Although there aren’t currently vaccines for all STI/STDs, there ones that you can take for HPV, Hepatitis A, and Hepatitis B. Just something to keep in mind.

There is nothing wrong with abstinence. Whenever people ask me how I could go so long abstaining — the freedom of not thinking about pregnancies or illnesses is a perk enough, chile. That said, if you want a season to go without worrying about any of this, abstinence will certainly do it for you.

___

Dormant STIs/STDs. Should they terrify you? No. Should you always be concerned and super proactive in how you move, though? 1,000 percent. After all, a lot goes on during sex. Make sure that you are responsible 2.0, so that it doesn’t end up blindsiding you with something that is not not present — just…asymptomatic.

Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.