This article is in partnership with FemiClear.
That moment of finding out you've been diagnosed with genital herpes can feel overwhelming. Aside from the shock of what this means for you physically, the mental toll can also weigh heavily. You may feel down on yourself and worried about the perception others will have of you — but the thing is, your life doesn't have to be turned upside down. These days, there are ways to not only find relief (including over-the-counter products like FemiClear for Genital Herpes Symptoms, which can help ease symptoms alongside your current Rx treatment), but to take back control of your body in the process.
Due to the lack of information and transparency surrounding herpes, misconceptions about the virus have thrived. Namely, that it only happens to a "certain" type of person, isn't treatable, or will disrupt your sex life for good, none of which are true. A number of doctors and advocates have been working for years to fight the stigma surrounding herpes.
"Our job is to break that barrier," says Dr. Jessica Shepherd, MD, an obstetrician-gynecologist. "When we give a diagnosis to someone, they're completely devastated. We let them know that they're not alone and that this is something that can definitely be treated."
Herpes is more common than you think.
A lot more common. In fact, 1 in 6 women between the ages of 14 and 49 in the United States have been diagnosed with genital herpes, according to the CDC — and an additional portion of the population is unaware that they have it. For non-Hispanic black women, herpes is even more prevalent, with about half having the condition. As shocking and lonely as a herpes diagnosis may feel, it's a feeling millions of women know well.
One of those women is Jenelle Marie Pierce, executive director of The STI Project and sex educator, who learned of her diagnosis in her late teens. Prior to contracting the virus, her perception of those with herpes reflected myths often told, especially to young people.
"My viewpoint was that only certain kinds of people contracted it," says Pierce. "All my ideas or perceptions around herpes and people who have herpes was totally stigmatized, all inaccurate of course, not to mention wildly harmful and shaming. I was incredibly ignorant and didn't have a lot of knowledge of how common it is and how all types of people contract it."
Truth is, hundreds of millions of women around the world live with genital herpes, which is largely, but not always, caused by the viral strain known as HSV-2 (short for herpes simplex virus type 2), according to the World Health Organization. Many people are unaware that herpes simplex virus type 1 is what causes cold sores, but even fewer know that it can also be transmitted to the genital area through oral sex. In recent years, the percentage of genital herpes diagnoses that are caused by the HSV-1 virus has increased. "I like to reassure patients that it's the same virus as a cold sore, and we definitely don't walk around treating people any differently when they have a cold sore," says Dr. Shepherd.
This lack of openness surrounding herpes can make the experience exponentially worse for those who contract it. "Everyone tells me their stories now," says Jenelle Marie Pierce. "It's something that I have to keep to myself when they're sharing something very personal and intimate about themselves, but I wish everyone knew how common this is and how it impacts all different types of people, all types of behavioral and sexuality styles and identities."
Treatment is easier than we’re led to believe.
Choosing to seek treatment for herpes is a major step in managing your symptoms. Your doctor will likely prescribe an antiviral medication, which can be helpful in reducing the length of your outbreaks as well as their frequency.
Still, even a few days of dealing with the discomfort of an outbreak feels like forever. New over-the-counter product, FemiClear for Genital Herpes Symptoms, offers an all-natural and organic treatment that works hand in hand with your prescription to help provide fast relief for herpes. When used in addition to antiviral treatment, FemiClear has been reported to result in less severe outbreaks, reducing itching, pain, and burning symptoms in 90% of women. FemiClear killed over 99.9% of the herpes simplex I and II viruses during an in vitro laboratory testing. If you're looking for a proven product, FemiClear can be found at your local CVS in the personal intimacy aisle (or on CVS.com, Target.com, and Amazon.com), so it's easy to get when you need it most. You can take it at the first sign of an outbreak and throughout your outbreak to help manage symptoms.
It’s all about embracing self-care.
While it may be daunting, it helps to look at the treatment process as an act of self-love. "I think the most important thing is to be gracious with yourself," says Pierce. "And to know that whatever the misconceptions you have around herpes and what this means for your dating and sex life is likely all incorrect. It's all a product of stigma and a lack of information and comprehensive education across the board."
Along with using medication and treatment products like FemiClear, managing herpes begins with tuning in to your body. "I usually tell people when they go for their annual exam just to get a screening," says Dr. Shepherd.
"It's just a barometer of your health. You're the protector of your pelvis and you really should be aware of what's going on at all times."
Featured image by Nappy.co
Although this might seem like a heavy way to intro this particular topic, because the O Method is an orgasm-achieving technique that centers around housing energy, embracing the mental practice of manifestation, and the attempt to achieve the best climaxes ever — it all works together pretty well if you ask me. If you want to take your orgasms to the next level, it’s important that you get out of yourself (to a certain extent), that you see the spiritual role that manifestation plays, and that you are open to trying new things. No doubt about it.
So, let’s learn more about what the O Method is all about and how it very well could be just what you’ve been looking for…even if you didn’t know it.
What Is the “O Method” All About?
GiphyQuestion: When’s the last time you’ve had an orgasm? Not just any orgasm — I mean a really mind-blowing one (I’ll give you a second to think about it). Now, what if you could manifest that experience to the point where it wasn’t a rare occurrence but something that happened almost every time that you and your partner had sex with each other? How absolutely awesome would that be?
That is pretty much what the O Method is all about — helping you achieve the kind of orgasms (and sexual pleasure, in general) that you desire through the practice of manifestation. And since your biggest sex organ is your brain, it would make perfect sense that even with all of the tips and techniques that you might learn to do as far as your body is concerned, honing in on what you think about is super imperative to sexual fulfillment, too. And that’s just where manifestation comes in.
What If You’ve Never “Manifested” Anything Before?
GiphyBefore we get into a quick lesson on manifestation, I think it’s important to mention two things. One, for the cynics, there is a lot of truth in the fact that it’s got some solid spiritual basis to it because even the Good Book says that as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he (Proverbs 23:7). At the same time, that same Good Book tells us that faith without works is dead (James 2:14-26). So, while it is always a good idea to focus on good, positive, and productive thoughts, just thinking about them isn’t enough — at some point, you’ve also gotta get out here and DO something (bookmark that).
Okay, with that mini-sermon out of the way, whether it’s in the bedroom or not, manifestation is basically about focusing on something tangible that you desire, harnessing your energy in such a way that your words and actions are directed towards that longing until what you want, well, manifests. For the record, aside from this having a spiritual backing to it, in many ways, science cosigns on manifesting, too. There is actually a scientific process known as neuroplasticity that consists of reframing your mind so that your actions ultimately end up aligning with your goals — and that is another way to look at manifestation.
So, what if you’re someone who has never set out to do a manifestation practice before? No worries. Something that’s awesome about it is there are several different approaches that you can take.
Some people manifest what they want in their lives via:
- Journaling
- Visualization/Creating vision boards
- Writing down their desires before going to bed (so that they can “download” them into their dream state)
- Creating mantras and affirmations
- Applying the 369 Manifestation Method (you can learn more about that here)
- Meditating
- Learning more about what you want to manifest (which brings forth clarity)
This is important to keep in mind because, when it comes to manifesting the types of orgasms that you want to have, as you can see, you can try different manifestation methods until you find one (or ones) that you are truly comfortable with. One that can ease you into the entire process rather smoothly is something known as sex journaling.
How Sex Journaling Can Actually Help You to Have an Orgasm
GiphyAs a writer, I’m a big fan of journaling. Mostly because it’s a way to get out some of your deepest thoughts and feelings so that you’re able to really process what is happening inside of you in a private setting. And when it comes to sex journaling, specifically, it’s all about centering yourself on the things sexually that you want to “unpack,” get clarity on or come to some revelations about. For instance, if there’s only been one partner from your past who’s been able to help you achieve the type of orgasms that you wish to manifest, journaling about what makes him different from the other guys can provide you with some solid ah-ha moments.
Or if you need help getting as specific as possible about the sexual experiences that you’re after, journaling can help to make that happen for you — because one thing that manifesting reminds us all to do is be as specific as possible.
Yeah, simply saying, “I want to have better sex” isn’t detailed enough when you want to get your energy to match with your desires — instead, describe how all of your senses should feel in the experience, along with why, that can get you so much closer to achieving your goal. Once those things are documented, you can segue into creating mantras and/or meditation that are based on them. Yeah, sex journaling really is an underrated superpower on a lot of levels (check out “The Art Of Sex Journaling (And Why You Should Do It)”).
5 Tips for Making the O Method Work for You
GiphyNow that you know more about what the O Method is and how manifestation plays a direct role in its process, let’s talk about five ways to make the O Method truly effective in your own (sex) life.
1. Focus, FULLY, on your feminine energy. What do rose quartz, amethyst, moonstone (which is a Gemini birthstone as well; yes, I’m a Gemini), selenite, and rhodonite all have in common? They’re crystals that help you to go deeper into your divine feminine energy. Traits that are associated with this include compassion, creativity, kindness, gentleness, and sensuality (feminine energy is also accepting and forgiving). If you were to study energy from a biological standpoint, it’s about producing change, responding to stimuli, and having the ability to do what needs to be done (work). So, when it comes to manifesting the kind of orgasms or sexual experiences that you want, using things like your creativity and gentleness in your thoughts and actions can play a role in bringing balance to your partner’s masculinity, which can create a profound sense of pleasure — after all, opposites do attract.
2. Don’t hold back on what it is that you desire. Whenever I interview sex therapists, something that they all say is, a huge mistake that people make as far as sexual satisfaction is concerned is, they have walls up — not just with their partners but even within themselves. Sometimes, there is intimidation, fear, or even shame around what they really want to happen during sex to the point where they aren’t able to channel their energy fully in those directions in order to manifest what they want. For the O Method to work, you can’t let those types of negative emotions hinder you; the more you are able to articulate what you want and how you want it, the better chance you have of making it happen. So yes, get graphic. As graphic as possible.
3. Make manifestation a daily practice. Repetition is important when it comes to manifestation. That’s because the more you declare what you desire (a mantra), get still and think on it (meditation), or look at the “art” that you’ve created surrounding it (visualization), the quicker it becomes a part of you. So yes, make manifestation a daily practice. For instance, if one of your mantras is, “I am going to have intensely passionate orgasms, one right after the other,” don’t just state that 15 minutes before sex is going to happen. Wake up and declare it. Then say it on your lunch break. And again before turning in. The more your thoughts are “streamlined” in this way, the easier it will be for your body to follow suit.
4. Share this practice with your partner. If you were to do even more research on the O Method, one thing that most of the articles will mention is it’s a practice that you can do alone or with your partner. Indeed. However, I just want to make sure that you get into your psyche that great sex is, in part, about good communication. And so, the more comfortable you are sharing with your partner what you are doing as far as the O Method is concerned and what you ultimately want to happen as a result of the practice, the easier it will be for him to “match your energy” — both in and out of the bedroom. And when your partner is on the same page as you? That definitely increases the chances of attaining your sexual desires — exponentially so.
5. Stay in the moment. While I was reading one article on manifestation, I really appreciated something that the author said: manifestation isn’t some supernatural power. In other words, while it can be beneficial, it’s not like you can just think of something, and it instantly appears out of nowhere. Manifesting is a discipline, and it must be accompanied by action, consistency, and patience — this means that you must also practice mindfulness. Meaning, now that you know better what you’re looking to achieve as far as sex is concerned, every time that it transpires, maintain a level of positive energy, remember what your end goal is, and then determine in your mind to enjoy the moments as they come. Remember, manifestation isn’t to add stress…it’s to cultivate clarity.
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At the end of the day, the O Method is simply a way of reminding you that your mind plays a huge role in your sexual pleasure, and when you channel it and your energy exactly where you want them both to go, you’ll be amazed what your body is capable of doing…and accomplishing.
So, what kind of orgasm are you wanting to achieve? You’ve got a tool to get you there. USE IT.
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Featured image by Giphy
