Let me start by saying, I give zero f*cks about Kardashian drama. I don't hate them, get your money. But as a journalist at heart and a cynic by nature, I can't help but believe that most celebrity drama is created for ratings. One of the first rules in branding is: all roads lead to the product, and in the case of the Jordyn Woods versus The Kardashians scandal, my first thought was that it was a publicity stunt to boost dialogue surrounding the upcoming season of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. Upon watching this week's episode of Jada Pinkett Smith's Red Table Talk, I realized that this might not be the case.
Jada sat down with Jordyn for an intense conversation about recent allegations against the star. According to tabloids, Jordyn, who has a decade-long friendship with Kylie Jenner, allegedly slept with Khloe Kardashian's boyfriend, Tristan Thompson. Since the news released, Jordyn has been called everything from a homewrecker to a bad friend, but now, the 21-year-old socialite has come forward to tell her side of the story and clear her name.
According to Jordyn, there was no relationship with Tristan before or after the alleged incident, and the way things played out was a lot different than the media portrayed. For starters, Jordyn claims that she was only at the basketball player's house for an after-party, and her biggest mistake was showing up. She told Jada:
"Sunday night, I went dinner with some friends and I went to this bar after. I was minding my business, dancing, drinking. Tristan was there, he was doing his own thing. Normal LA culture, go to the bar, go to the club, you go to someone's house afterward. We're not thinking about whose house. We're all having fun, we're in the moment."
Here's everything we learned from the interview:
Will Smith Is Jordyn Woods' Godfather
In my eyes, Jada and Will can do no wrong. But when I heard there would be a special episode featuring Jordyn Woods, I gave them a major side eye. I thought it was odd that Jada would use the platform she created to inspire so many women to fuel celebrity drama, so how in the hell did Jada get mixed up in all of this? It wasn't until I watched the episode that I learned that Jordyn and the Smith family actually have a life-long connection.
Jordyn's late-father worked on the set of the The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air as a sound engineer, where he and Will developed a friendship. During the interview, we learned that not only have Jordyn and Jaden been besties since birth, but Will is also Jordyn's godfather. He even stopped by the Red Table before the interview via FaceTime to give Jordyn these words of encouragement:
"The world attacks. It just happens. But I want you to know that you are supported. I got you and I got you… Take your medicine and tell your truth. This is a part of what growing up is, this is a part of what learning is, a part of what family is. This world is not going to break you. We won't allow it."
Jordyn Woods Didn't Have Sex With Tristan Thompson
Although Jordyn did admit that she felt wrong for even being at Tristan's house, she said that there was no intercourse between the two and that they had stayed in a public setting for the entire duration of the party. She explained:
"He didn't even personally invite me there…We're all dancing and we're drinking and we're all enjoying the time and I'm not thinking I shouldn't be here. And that's my first step where I went wrong. And how I would feel if someone close to me is hanging at my ex's house or the father of my child. I didn't think about that. That's the first part of the problem. The first step is, I should have gone home after the party. I shouldn't have been there. Never once was I giving him a lap dance, making out with him, sitting all over him, it's just we're all together, we're in a group. Never once did we leave the public area, go to a bedroom, go to a bathroom, we're all in plain sight."
"It was just an innocent time."
...But Tristan Did Kiss Her
But… there were some questionable moments that took place at the alleged after-party. For example, Jordyn remembers laying his legs on top of his. And, when she was getting ready to leave, an unwarranted kiss:
"So this is where the story gets tricky. I feel like I can't point fingers and I can't say you did this because I allowed myself to be in that position. I allowed myself to be there. I never was belligerently drunk to where I can't remember what happened. I was never blacked out. I was drunk. I was not tipsy. I was drunk but I was not beyond the point of recollection. I know where I was."
At the time, Jordyn says she was at a loss for words and left immediately. She revealed:
"On the way out, he did kiss me. No passion. It was a kiss on the lips but no tongue kiss, no making out. And I don't think he's wrong either because I allowed myself to be in that position and when alcohol's involved, people make dumb moves or they get caught up in the moment."
Jordyn Wasn't Forthcoming Initially
My first thought after hearing this was, well did you tell Khloe what happened? But Jordyn explained that it wasn't that easy. After spending the ride home trying to forgive and forget what Tristan had done, she made the decision to keep the incident to herself. Jordyn shared:
"In my head, trying to forget that part of the story, I said, 'No he was chillin. There were girls there but he wasn't all over them.' I was honest about being there. I wasn't honest about the actions that had taken place. I just knew how much turmoil was going on, I was like let me not throw more fuel on the fire."
How The Kardashian Drama Has Affected Jordyn's Personal Life
Contrary to my belief, Jordyn revealed that nothing about this situation was for publicity, and the aftermath has affected her in ways that are almost too devastating to talk about. According to Jordyn, the first few days were the hardest:
"I couldn't eat. I didn't eat for days. I wouldn't look at my phone even. I would just try to sleep and hope that this wouldn't be true. Every time you refresh the page, it's another person bullying me, or wishing death upon me or telling me something like, 'Your father deserved to die.' I may have done something wrong but whatever I did, I don't think I deserve this."
In the emotional interview, Jordyn explained that it was important that she break her silence not to save her reputation, but to protect the people she loves. She continued:
"It's even hard for me to say this. Everyone's safety is now…we can't leave the house. My brother can't go to work. My sister can't go to school, she's twelve years old. My mom can't even go to the grocery store. I'm not here to play the victim. I'm here to take responsibility. And when I was asked about what happened, I didn't tell the truth to the people I loved, not because of malicious intent. But because I was just scared."
Now, I'm not here to pass judgment. Even though Jordyn Woods and The Kardashians are public figures, it doesn't give us the right to be judge, jury, or executioner when it comes to morality. But what I can say is, when I was 21 years old and made stupid mistakes, I had the advantage of not having my wrongs blasted and misconstrued all over the internet.
As much as I hate reality TV drama (with the exception of Black Ink Crew: Chicago, that's my sh*t), I am so glad Jada decided to bring Jordyn on Red Table Talk to speak her truth. No matter what the truth is, it's so important that we have people like Will and Jada in our lives who have our back and help us change the narrative. Despite how entertaining celebrity drama might be, the interview helped me gain an alternative perspective on how real lives can be affected by petty drama.
Watch the full video below:
Featured image by Jordyn Woods/Instagram.
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Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
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What Are Intrusive Thoughts & How Do We Manage Them?
TW: some depictions of intrusive thoughts may be disturbing for readers.
Have you ever caught your mind drifting off to entertain the most disturbing scenarios imaginable? Maybe you can’t stop thinking of all the ways a loved one could pass away or worrying that you left every candle lit in your apartment to which you’d return to a home in ruins. If distressing ruminations like these have crossed your mind, you may be experiencing an intrusive thought.
What Are Intrusive Thoughts?
Intrusive thoughts are unwanted or distressing thoughts, images, or impulses that pop into your mind without your control or consent. These thoughts can be repetitive, unsettling, or even violent in nature, and can cause anxiety and frustration for those who experience them.
“Generally they're unwanted thoughts that come up in our head that interrupt what we're doing or thinking, and can feel very foreign,” says Adia Gooden, PhD, licensed clinical psychologist and host of the Unconditionally Worthy podcast. “It’s any thought that intrudes or interrupts what you are doing. They can be distressing and upsetting for us because it feels like we are not in control of them, and they're coming up out of nowhere and aren’t in line with how you normally think.”
What Causes Intrusive Thoughts?
Certain trauma or stress can contribute to the development of intrusive thoughts, so having a challenging experience from the past or current life situations may trigger them to form. “An intrusive thought could come in the form of a flashback, image, or a thought about something that's happened to you,” Dr. Gooden tells xoNecole. “When it gets to the point where you feel like you can't function or make clear decisions, that's when intrusive thoughts become really challenging.”
While some of the 1 billion videos found under the #intrusivethoughts hashtag on TikTok would lead you to believe that these thoughts are nothing more than casual displays of our imagination going untamed. Intrusive thoughts are more than sticking your hand in a soap dispenser, wanting to cut all your hair off at 3 a.m., or having a random impulse to eat fake bread in public.
The Anxiety & Depression Association of America reports that approximately six million individuals, equating to roughly two percent of the American population, encounter intrusive thoughts. Intrusive thoughts are often linked with obsessive-compulsive disorders, but they can also manifest in individuals with post-traumatic stress disorder, depression, or anxiety.
Examples of Common Intrusive Thoughts
Because of the explicit nature of intrusive thoughts, they tend to cause shame and internal conflict in those who experience them. Although these thoughts can differ from person to person, these ideation can consist of:
- Violent or aggressive thoughts towards oneself or others, such as harming or killing someone;
- Sexual thoughts that are unwanted or inappropriate;
- Repetitive thoughts, such as a song or a phrase that keeps repeating in your mind;
- Contamination or germ-related thoughts or the fear of contamination and getting sick;
- Religious or blasphemous thoughts, such as questioning one's faith or having thoughts that go against religious beliefs;
- Doubts or uncertainty about one's own actions or decisions, such as fear of making a mistake or fear of not doing something right.
Intrusive Thoughts and OCD
That’s why Dr. Gooden encourages everyone to understand the difference between our fleeting thoughts and impulses and true, intrusive thoughts. “What level of distress does it cause and is it something you would never consider,” she says. “If you're finding that these thoughts are getting in the way of you living your life and that you're controlled by the thoughts, those are some signs that it would be good to get some support in navigating it.”
She also emphasizes the importance of understanding that while we may not always have control over our thoughts, we can control our behavior. “On TikTok, people are sort of blaming intrusive thoughts on their behavior, and our behavior is always a choice,” she says. “If we are in our right mind and we're not having a psychotic episode, our behavior is our choice — we are not obligated to follow any given thought that we have.”
Are Intrusive Thoughts Normal?
With intrusive thoughts, it’s natural to question whether these thoughts are “normal” to have. However, these thoughts are not meant to define who you are as a person but simply indicate that you have a functioning human mind with automated thoughts that you, or any of us, can’t control. These thoughts may come, but they don’t have to be acted upon, nor do they define who you are.
“I've worked with clients in the past who say, ‘Why am I thinking these things? What's wrong with me?’ But if you're not acting on the thought, then it's probably not a huge issue,” Dr. Gooden says. “If you are thinking a harmful thought towards yourself or someone else and you are making plans to act on that thought, then yes, we need to do something about it.”
How To Manage Intrusive Thoughts
If you are struggling with managing unwanted thoughts, Dr. Aida suggests taking these tips to help manage your mindset when they occur:
- "Recognize that it's a thought and thoughts are just thoughts. We often put a little bit too much weight on our thoughts, and that can create a lot of distress. But remember that thoughts are not facts."
- "Having a thought that's disturbing or upsetting doesn't make you a bad person, and it doesn't mean that you are suffering from a mental illness."
- "Sometimes the best thing you can do is say, 'Huh, that was an interesting thought. I'm going to let that go. That thought is not helpful for me right now."
- "Ask yourself: is this helpful? Is it helpful for me to buy into this thought and believe this thought? Asking that question can be really helpful because we are not at the mercy of our thoughts. If it's not helpful, you can let it go."
Intrusive thoughts can feel bizarre and foreign when they come up, but they aren't inherently "bad." Our minds can sometimes be filled with random and inappropriate thoughts, but that's what our stream of consciousness does: it thinks. Fortunately, we can release those thoughts at any moment; you don't have to follow through with them.
And ultimately, not every TikTok diagnosis is one that we should label ourselves with.
"It's important for people to acknowledge what they're experiencing but not run too quickly to diagnose themselves with some mental illness or disorder," Dr. Gooden advises. "It ends with confusion, and we miss the opportunity to understand the people who really do have that mental health challenge."
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