Back in August, I made a decision: social media and I needed a break. I didn't know for how long or what would come of it, I just knew that something needed to change about my relationship with the social apps on my phone… and quick.
My time away from social media had me asking myself an important question: Why did I need to take time away from these seemingly harmless apps in the first place? When did Instagraming and tweeting stop being about the joy of sharing moments to becoming a job I no longer wanted to show up to everyday?
As a blogger, a huge part of my traffic would come from my social media platforms. This meant that every post had to be handcrafted and meticulously rolled out according to algorithms and the gamification that the platform has recently introduced. All of this extra work began to consume my time and energy; I even started to avoid plans if they would cut into my scheduled posting times.
If that wasn't extreme enough, social media began affecting my mood and self-esteem. I would find that I would compare myself to the accomplishments that other bloggers and classmates of mine would share on my timeline.
Enough was enough.
I finally came to the decision that something just wasn't right about the way these apps would leave me feeling once I returned to my home screen, so it was time to say goodbye – at least for a little while.
Taking two months away from social media was like removing processed sugar from my diet; I was thinking clearer, felt less dependent on my phone, and was able to form complete thoughts instead of being influenced by the constant inundation of other people's ideas and opinions.
When you've taken time away from something that was once a huge part of your daily routine, you finally begin to see things for what they really are and here are just a few of them:
We’re Not Addicted to Our Phones
GiphyTechnically, it's not our actual phones that we're addicted to, or else we'd see more people taking phone calls as opposed to have their heads down in a state of blinding distraction. In fact, the opposite is true: it's the apps on the phone that we've grown addicted to. Remember when phones were mere devices used solely for basic communication? It wasn't until phones got the "Smart" added in front of them that things started to change. Apps that allow us to share photos, update statuses, and constantly refresh new trending topics have become the time consumers, not the phone itself. App developers want us to spend more time on their apps, so it feels more difficult to put the phone down. So you're not crazy; it was designed that way.
Real vs. Online Friends
GiphyThe interesting part about taking time away from social media is that you learn the difference between your real friends and associates who just like you for what you post online. After about three weeks into my social media fast, I started to get texts and emails from people who were "just checking in on me," and I can't express how much I appreciated that. It's easy to keep up with people when you see them on IG Stories and Snapchat every day because they're literally right in your face. But once that person removes themselves from being easily accessible, the people that really care show up. I didn't go away from social media to be missed, but it did show me that the people who truly care about your well-being will find a way to let you know, no question.
Everybody’s Drunk
GiphyHave you ever been to a party where everyone is drinking except for you? That's exactly what it's like watching people on their phones while you're disconnected. You see people walking with their heads down, avoiding conversation and bumping into things. When you take a step back and become the spectator to this phenomenon, you're able to see just how distracted and anti-social we've all become. Not judging, but we could all benefit from getting back to our roots of communication. It only takes a few seconds to strike up a conversation with your Uber driver or even the cashier at the grocery store. One of the great things about being human is that we are able to connect and share life with one other, just don't forget that you can do this without your phone.
Reading Is Still Fundamental
GiphyOnce I gave up social media, I had time to return to my first love: reading. Not just reading novels, but news articles and my Bible. I was no longer getting my news from the opinions of my Twitter feed or depending on influencers to give me my dosage of inspiration for the day, I had to seek it out for myself. Instead of checking my social feeds before bed, I would crack open a book or magazine and fill my head with something insightful or educational. In the end, I found that finishing a book or article gave me a sense of accomplishment that I missed and allowed me to exercise my brain instead of leaving it on autopilot.
Related Stories:
Why Taking A Break From Social Media Is Critical For My Self-Care Routine – Read More
How to Shoot Your Friend Shot in the Social Media Era – Read More
I Took A Digital Detox From Social Media And This Is What Happened – Read More
Featured image by Getty Images
- Break Up With Your Phone - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- Celebs Are Reminding Us Of The Power Of Taking Mental Health Breaks And You Can Too - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- My social media fast ›
- Why You Should Consider a Social Media Fast ›
- What I experienced on my 30 day social media fast. – Hacker Noon ›
- How a Media Fast can Benefit your Health | Paleo Leap ›
- Thinking of doing a social media fast? Here's what its like ›
- The Social Media Fast: Why I'm Going 30 Days Without Checking In ... ›
- The Social Media Fast: Why I'm Going 30 Days Without Checking In ... ›
- Your 7-Day Social Media Fast ›
- What Happened When I Gave Up Social Media For A Month ›
- 10 Benefits of a Social Media Fast ›
Although this might seem like a heavy way to intro this particular topic, because the O Method is an orgasm-achieving technique that centers around housing energy, embracing the mental practice of manifestation, and the attempt to achieve the best climaxes ever — it all works together pretty well if you ask me. If you want to take your orgasms to the next level, it’s important that you get out of yourself (to a certain extent), that you see the spiritual role that manifestation plays, and that you are open to trying new things. No doubt about it.
So, let’s learn more about what the O Method is all about and how it very well could be just what you’ve been looking for…even if you didn’t know it.
What Is the “O Method” All About?
GiphyQuestion: When’s the last time you’ve had an orgasm? Not just any orgasm — I mean a really mind-blowing one (I’ll give you a second to think about it). Now, what if you could manifest that experience to the point where it wasn’t a rare occurrence but something that happened almost every time that you and your partner had sex with each other? How absolutely awesome would that be?
That is pretty much what the O Method is all about — helping you achieve the kind of orgasms (and sexual pleasure, in general) that you desire through the practice of manifestation. And since your biggest sex organ is your brain, it would make perfect sense that even with all of the tips and techniques that you might learn to do as far as your body is concerned, honing in on what you think about is super imperative to sexual fulfillment, too. And that’s just where manifestation comes in.
What If You’ve Never “Manifested” Anything Before?
GiphyBefore we get into a quick lesson on manifestation, I think it’s important to mention two things. One, for the cynics, there is a lot of truth in the fact that it’s got some solid spiritual basis to it because even the Good Book says that as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he (Proverbs 23:7). At the same time, that same Good Book tells us that faith without works is dead (James 2:14-26). So, while it is always a good idea to focus on good, positive, and productive thoughts, just thinking about them isn’t enough — at some point, you’ve also gotta get out here and DO something (bookmark that).
Okay, with that mini-sermon out of the way, whether it’s in the bedroom or not, manifestation is basically about focusing on something tangible that you desire, harnessing your energy in such a way that your words and actions are directed towards that longing until what you want, well, manifests. For the record, aside from this having a spiritual backing to it, in many ways, science cosigns on manifesting, too. There is actually a scientific process known as neuroplasticity that consists of reframing your mind so that your actions ultimately end up aligning with your goals — and that is another way to look at manifestation.
So, what if you’re someone who has never set out to do a manifestation practice before? No worries. Something that’s awesome about it is there are several different approaches that you can take.
Some people manifest what they want in their lives via:
- Journaling
- Visualization/Creating vision boards
- Writing down their desires before going to bed (so that they can “download” them into their dream state)
- Creating mantras and affirmations
- Applying the 369 Manifestation Method (you can learn more about that here)
- Meditating
- Learning more about what you want to manifest (which brings forth clarity)
This is important to keep in mind because, when it comes to manifesting the types of orgasms that you want to have, as you can see, you can try different manifestation methods until you find one (or ones) that you are truly comfortable with. One that can ease you into the entire process rather smoothly is something known as sex journaling.
How Sex Journaling Can Actually Help You to Have an Orgasm
GiphyAs a writer, I’m a big fan of journaling. Mostly because it’s a way to get out some of your deepest thoughts and feelings so that you’re able to really process what is happening inside of you in a private setting. And when it comes to sex journaling, specifically, it’s all about centering yourself on the things sexually that you want to “unpack,” get clarity on or come to some revelations about. For instance, if there’s only been one partner from your past who’s been able to help you achieve the type of orgasms that you wish to manifest, journaling about what makes him different from the other guys can provide you with some solid ah-ha moments.
Or if you need help getting as specific as possible about the sexual experiences that you’re after, journaling can help to make that happen for you — because one thing that manifesting reminds us all to do is be as specific as possible.
Yeah, simply saying, “I want to have better sex” isn’t detailed enough when you want to get your energy to match with your desires — instead, describe how all of your senses should feel in the experience, along with why, that can get you so much closer to achieving your goal. Once those things are documented, you can segue into creating mantras and/or meditation that are based on them. Yeah, sex journaling really is an underrated superpower on a lot of levels (check out “The Art Of Sex Journaling (And Why You Should Do It)”).
5 Tips for Making the O Method Work for You
GiphyNow that you know more about what the O Method is and how manifestation plays a direct role in its process, let’s talk about five ways to make the O Method truly effective in your own (sex) life.
1. Focus, FULLY, on your feminine energy. What do rose quartz, amethyst, moonstone (which is a Gemini birthstone as well; yes, I’m a Gemini), selenite, and rhodonite all have in common? They’re crystals that help you to go deeper into your divine feminine energy. Traits that are associated with this include compassion, creativity, kindness, gentleness, and sensuality (feminine energy is also accepting and forgiving). If you were to study energy from a biological standpoint, it’s about producing change, responding to stimuli, and having the ability to do what needs to be done (work). So, when it comes to manifesting the kind of orgasms or sexual experiences that you want, using things like your creativity and gentleness in your thoughts and actions can play a role in bringing balance to your partner’s masculinity, which can create a profound sense of pleasure — after all, opposites do attract.
2. Don’t hold back on what it is that you desire. Whenever I interview sex therapists, something that they all say is, a huge mistake that people make as far as sexual satisfaction is concerned is, they have walls up — not just with their partners but even within themselves. Sometimes, there is intimidation, fear, or even shame around what they really want to happen during sex to the point where they aren’t able to channel their energy fully in those directions in order to manifest what they want. For the O Method to work, you can’t let those types of negative emotions hinder you; the more you are able to articulate what you want and how you want it, the better chance you have of making it happen. So yes, get graphic. As graphic as possible.
3. Make manifestation a daily practice. Repetition is important when it comes to manifestation. That’s because the more you declare what you desire (a mantra), get still and think on it (meditation), or look at the “art” that you’ve created surrounding it (visualization), the quicker it becomes a part of you. So yes, make manifestation a daily practice. For instance, if one of your mantras is, “I am going to have intensely passionate orgasms, one right after the other,” don’t just state that 15 minutes before sex is going to happen. Wake up and declare it. Then say it on your lunch break. And again before turning in. The more your thoughts are “streamlined” in this way, the easier it will be for your body to follow suit.
4. Share this practice with your partner. If you were to do even more research on the O Method, one thing that most of the articles will mention is it’s a practice that you can do alone or with your partner. Indeed. However, I just want to make sure that you get into your psyche that great sex is, in part, about good communication. And so, the more comfortable you are sharing with your partner what you are doing as far as the O Method is concerned and what you ultimately want to happen as a result of the practice, the easier it will be for him to “match your energy” — both in and out of the bedroom. And when your partner is on the same page as you? That definitely increases the chances of attaining your sexual desires — exponentially so.
5. Stay in the moment. While I was reading one article on manifestation, I really appreciated something that the author said: manifestation isn’t some supernatural power. In other words, while it can be beneficial, it’s not like you can just think of something, and it instantly appears out of nowhere. Manifesting is a discipline, and it must be accompanied by action, consistency, and patience — this means that you must also practice mindfulness. Meaning, now that you know better what you’re looking to achieve as far as sex is concerned, every time that it transpires, maintain a level of positive energy, remember what your end goal is, and then determine in your mind to enjoy the moments as they come. Remember, manifestation isn’t to add stress…it’s to cultivate clarity.
_____
At the end of the day, the O Method is simply a way of reminding you that your mind plays a huge role in your sexual pleasure, and when you channel it and your energy exactly where you want them both to go, you’ll be amazed what your body is capable of doing…and accomplishing.
So, what kind of orgasm are you wanting to achieve? You’ve got a tool to get you there. USE IT.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Giphy
