

So, before getting into how to naturally produce more vaginal lubrication, I think it's important to put on record that, when it comes to what comes out of our vagina, there's discharge, there's cervical fluid and then there's lubrication which typically happens whenever you're sexually aroused. Discharge (and to a certain extent, cervical fluid; they both tend to change somewhat throughout the month) is fluid that comes out of your vagina and consists of cells from your cervix and vagina, along with bacteria, mucus and water. Lubrication—you know, "getting wet"—is all about what happens when you're either strongly physically attracted to someone or you're in the act of foreplay. Today, we're gonna touch on how to keep the latter (sexual arousal-related fluids) flowing.
Foreplay is certainly one of the best ways to ensure that you are able to get and stay wet so that sex can be more comfortable and pleasurable for you. And, of course, there's definitely nothing wrong with using manufactured lubricant to get the job done. Still, it's also wise to keep in mind that there are things that you can do, health-wise, from the natural side of things, that can keep everything going…just as you would like it to too. So, if you're someone who lives by the motto "the wetter, the better" when it comes to sex, here are 10 ways that can help you with attaining this particular goal.
1. Drink More Water
Did you know that 75 percent of Americans are chronically dehydrated? That they only consume about 2 ½ cups of water each day? You can check out "10 Overlooked Signs That You're Dehydrated" to get a good idea of why being dehydrated tends to be so problematic. In the meantime, I'm pretty sure you can put two and two together as it relates to how not having enough H2O in your system can cause your vagina to become like the Sahara up in there. Drinking eight glasses of water each day is the traditional recommendation when it comes to staying properly hydrated. "She" will definitely thank you if you adhere.
2. Exercise 2-4 Times a Week
No matter how you're trying to improve your overall health and well-being, you're going to have a hard time finding an article that doesn't mention exercise as one way to do it. As far as lubricating your vagina is concerned, cardio, 2-3 times a week, for 20-45 minutes at a time, is great because it helps to get your blood circulation going. Your body needs this to happen because that's how your system gets the consistent oxygen and nutrients that it requires. Blood flow to your nether regions is important, especially when it comes to sexual arousal because it can intensify your orgasms. Plus, exercising also helps to keep your hormones balanced. The more balanced they are, the easier it will be for your vagina to get and remain lubricated. So, definitely make working out a part of your daily routine.
3. Take a Vitamin D Supplement
Because we've got melanin in us, it's more difficult for our bodies to produce Vitamin D. As a result, one study cites that as much as 76 percent of the American Black population is Vitamin D deficient. We need Vitamin D because it helps to strengthen our bones and muscles, helps to fight bodily inflammation and it can even assist in preventing type 1 and 2 diabetes. Not only that but there is more and more data coming out to support the fact Vitamin D that can also help to protect us—yes, Black people—from getting COVID-19. And just why does your vagina need it? Word on the street is, if you take Vitamin D in supplement form, daily, for eight weeks, you should notice less vaginal dryness and more lubrication.
Since Vitamin D is beneficial in so many other ways, it definitely can't hurt to give it a shot.
4. Also, Take a Vitamin E One While You’re at It
While we're on the topic of supplements, another one that you may want to take is Vitamin E. One of the best things about this particular vitamin is it's an awesome antioxidant that helps to protect your cells from experiencing damage. As it specifically relates to your vagina, Vitamin E has the ability to reduce vaginal atrophy-related issues. Vaginal atrophy is what happens when the walls of your vagina start to thin which can lead to dryness. In fact, the results of Vitamin E increase significantly when they are paired with Vitamin D, so hopefully that's the inspiration you need in order to take both.
5. Add Some Sea Buckthorn Oil to Your Regimen
Something that I try to do is provide a heads up on various things that may not be brought up often. In walks, sea buckthorn oil. Long story short, it's an oil that is extracted from berries that come from the sea buckthorn plant. It's actually an oil that is very popular in Ayurvedic and traditional Chinese medicines. Aside from being packed with antioxidants, sea buckthorn oil is full of mono and polyunsaturated fat which are healthy fats. This makes the oil good for your heart. It's also able to help to prevent diabetes, boost your immunity, protect your skin from UV damage, fight cancer cells and help to keep your liver in top condition. Sea buckthorn oil makes the cut in this article because it's so hydrating that it can help to relieve vaginal dryness over time. Taking it daily, for three months, should result in your experiencing noticeable improvements.
6. Consume Some Fatty Acids
Omega-3-6-9 are all considered to be fatty acids. Fatty acids are good for you because they help to build your cell membranes. Specifically, omega-3 fats can fight inflammation, strengthen your heart and decrease liver fat. Omega-6 can help to fight off chronic diseases. Omega-9 is one that your body naturally produces; it also fights off inflammation. If you eat foods that are high in omega-3 like fish, walnuts, and chia seeds and take an evening primrose oil supplement (something that I am a huge fan of) for your omega-6 fix (by the way, foods that contain this fatty acid include sunflower seeds, almonds, and cashews), they both can help to increase vaginal lubrication; especially if you're currently going through menopause.
7. Have Some Isoflavones
Sometimes vaginal dryness is the direct result of being lower in estrogen than you should be. One way to combat this particular issue is to consume more isoflavones which, at the end of the day, are nothing more than plant-based estrogen. Foods that contain soy have isoflavones in them. However, if you're not a big soy person, green peas, cherries, celery, peanuts, lima beans, chickpeas and flaxseeds contain a lower amount of isoflavones than soy does; still, they do have a good amount of isoflavones in them. Drinking some red clover tea or taking a red clover supplement is another route that you can take. Just make sure to run that one by your doctor first because sometimes red clover is so powerful that it can affect your birth control's potency.
8. Up Your Protein
Long story short, protein is a macronutrient that helps to build muscle mass. That's not all, though. Protein is necessary because our hair and nails are made up of protein. We also need protein to keep our bones strong, boost our metabolism, lower our blood pressure, repair body tissues and oxygenate our system.
Your vagina could use some protein because a lot of protein-based foods contain amino acids that produce collagen. Collagen helps to give your vagina more elasticity which improves your vagina's ability to produce more lubrication. Foods that are high in protein include red meat, poultry, fish, eggs and yogurt (also check out "Vegetarian Or Vegan? Check Out These High Protein Foods.").
9. Stand Up More Often
You know, there are a lot of articles out in cyberspace that basically say "sitting is the new smoking". One of the reasons why is because sitting for hours on end can affect our posture which can affect our blood circulation and I've already touched on how that can cause your vagina to produce less lubrication than it needs to. A remedy? Stand up more often throughout the day. On your breaks and during your lunch hour, get away from your desk and walk around a bit. Every 15-20 minutes or so, stand up and stretch for a couple of minutes. If you're conducting a meeting, opt for standing rather than sitting if you can. Standing is a simple way to get more blood flowing through your body which can help you from head-to-hip-to toe.
10. Manage Your Stress
Something else that can definitely get your hormones totally out of wack is stress. And again, when your hormones are all topsy-turvy, it can make vaginal lubrication so much more of a challenge. That's why it's important to get no less than 6-8 hours of sleep, to do things that you enjoy, practice self-care, chill out sometimes, and—oh, the irony—have sex. All of these things will keep you calm so that the juices can flow. Yes, sis. Quite literally.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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Yes, Spring Fever Is A Very Real Thing. I've Got Some Tips For How To Manage It Well, Tho.
Now that the spring season is officially here (can you believe it?!), let’s talk about something that tends to come up quite a bit yet you may have wondered if it’s just a saying or popular myth: spring fever.
I don’t know about you but when I heard it while growing up, it was always in the context of a relationship — you know, “Shellie, you’re just thinking about that boy because you’ve got ‘spring fever.'” However, because I enjoy knowing the origin story of hell, just about everything, I’ve discovered over time that not only is spring fever an actual phenomenon, although it can affect your romantic life (as well as your libido), it has the ability to impact you in a few other ways too.
So, before we look up and — boom — we’re just a few weeks away from summer (because that really is how this year is going, y’all), take a moment to learn more about spring fever and how you can actually make it work for you in ways that you may not have ever even considered before.
Spring Fever. What Is It All About?
A fun fact about me is I was born in Lincoln, Nebraska. If you add to that the fact that my mother is a New Yorker, perhaps that is why my favorite times of the year are fall and winter (check out “There Are Actually Scientific Reasons Why So Many Of Us Adore The Fall Season”) — including the fact that, yes, I like it cold and dark. Oh, I so enjoy cuddling up in cable-knit blankets in a room that is filled with candles. It is absolutely my thing.
In fact, I hate that I didn’t plan better this year, so that I could take a vacation to Colorado during this month since, reportedly, March is when a lot of the state tends to have the most snow. And if you add to that the fact that I am a bona fide ambivert — listen, if anyone is perfectly content with spending most of my time indoors (my house, specifically) with a cup of hot chocolate and a book or a good movie…she is I and I am her.
Still, that doesn’t mean that, over the past week or so, I haven’t felt the urge to get out more than I typically do. And from what I’ve read, that is probably due to, yep, spring fever — a time when many people feel more restless and/or like they have more energy than usual. And although it’s not technically a medical condition, many experts on the topic say that spring fever should be taken quite seriously.
The main reason is because when daylight savings time “springs forward,” it gives us extra daylight. When that happens, it actually has an impact on your circadian rhythm (the pattern that your body experiences every 24-hour cycle). There are actually pros and cons to this because while, on one hand, “losing an hour of sleep” can up your stress levels (including when it comes to your heart) which is a con, more sunlight also has a way of increasing your serotonin levels which is a pro. You see, serotonin is one of the “feel-good hormones” in your body that causes you to feel happier; it also makes you want to stay awake for longer periods of time.
Something else about spring fever that has some science to back it: You do tend to take a bigger interest in dating and sex (even though fall is reportedly the best time of year for copulation — check out “Did You Know Fall & Winter Are The Best Times To Have Sex?”). There is actually a pretty scientific basis for why this is the case (that you can read here). For now, I guess the best way to explain it would be that sunlight hits your optic nerve which influences the part of your brain known as your pineal gland. When that happens, less melatonin is produced and, since melatonin can actually lower your libido — there you have it: suppressed melatonin can increase your interest in flirting, dating, and intimacy, and being out in the sun more helps to make all of this happen.
Not to mention the fact thatother reports have stated that spring is a time of the year when people tend to be more body image conscious too. Since layering season is gone and yet it’s not quite time to pull out a bathing suit (check out “These 12 Tips Will Make You Feel More Confident In Your Swimsuit”), springtime is a time of preparation. And since you’ve got all of that extra energy — and potential dating interest — spring fever can help to make you more focused on getting your body in the shape that you want it to be in over the course of the next few months.
A final thing about spring fever — it may causeyour moods to be a bit…erratic. That makes sense when you really stop to think about it because spring weather tends to be the same way with all of its roller-coaster ride temperatures, “April showers” and whatnot. So, more than usual, you may feel like you want to hang out for hours with friends one day and then not even want to answer your phone another — which is pretty much a reminder that spring is a season when you should really listen to your mind, body, and spirit to see what it needs.
5 Ways to Handle Spring Fever (So That It Doesn’t Control You)
Okay, so now that you know that spring fever isn’t just a saying, that it actually has some solid truth to it, here are a few tips that can help to keep it from throwing you off course:
1. Be intentional about stabilizing your moods. It’s not good enough to know that certain things will impact your moods in a random way and then do nothing about it. And since spring fever may have you a bit all over the place, eat foods that will help to make you feel better (check out “In A Bad Mood? These Foods Will Lift Your Spirits!”), look into supplements that will boost your moods (like probiotics, magnesium, and vitamin D), and do some meditating outdoors. The combination of sunlight and deep breathing can do wonders.
2. Get on a sleep schedule. More sun really can throw your sleep patterns off, so you might want to consider putting your body on a sleep schedule. Y’all, I actually read that spring is the season when heart attacks and strokes increase, in part, due to sleep deprivation — so please don’t be out here thinking that just because you may not feel like sleeping that you don’t actually need to. YOU. DO. (Check out “12 Monthly Sleep Habits To Transform Your Rest In 2025”).
3. Exercise…even if it’s in baby steps. There are a billion reasons why we all need to exercise, no matter what time of year it is; however, if the body image thing is really on your mind, there are so many ways to get your body toned up. Jumping jacks, lunges, squats, mountain climbers, bicycle crunches — these are all things that you can do from the comfort and convenience of your house. And walking around your neighborhood either before work or after dinner (or both), especially now that it’s warmer — that is a cool way to get some cardio in. Anyway, Healthline has a helpful article on this topic. Check out “30 Moves to Make the Most of Your At-Home Workout” when you get a chance.
4. Date with a “sober” mind. A wise person once said, “Feelings don’t have intellect.” Yeah, don’t get me to preachin’ up in here (again) about just how much I hate the saying “Follow your heart” when the Good Book clearly says that the heart is deceitful (Jeremiah 17:9-10). For now, let’s just leave it at this: You get that science says that your urge to, umm, entertain more, may increase right now. Just make sure that you don’t just “go with the flow of your feelings”. Bring some common sense, street smarts, and even patience to the table. Springtime is just one season. Make choices that will make the rest of the year awesome as well.
5. Put all of that extra energy to wise use. You already read that feeling restless is pretty normal these days; that doesn’t mean that you’ve gotta do reckless things, though. The way that I see it, extra energy can help you to make some plans, reach a goal (whether it’s long-term or short-term), or try something new that you’ve always wanted to do. Bottom line: just because spring fever may have you feeling like you’re all over the place, that doesn’t mean that you can’t cultivate some real direction. Use this time to make you end this year in a way that makes you smile. All because you used spring fever…instead of allowing it to use you!
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