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Women's Health

7 'Divine Femininity Traits' That Your Vagina Wants More Of

Divine femininity is something that I’ve been aware of for quite some time; however, it was not until I was in the process of selecting a life coaching school in order to earn my PCC that I found myself deep diving, even more, into what it was all about.

The reason why is because “the principal” of my school (which is what I refer to her as) told me that she sensed that divine femininity was going to become a big part of my focus during this particular season of my life — and interestingly enough, my townhouse going up in flames (talk about “beauty for ashes,” chile) played a direct role in it.


Since I am a “signs and wonders” kind of person, I applied some of what she said as I became both a student of life coaching (on another level) and what divine femininity is all about.

And just what is divine femininity? It’s interesting because some of the answer to that is based on who you ask. Personally, I believe that the easiest way to define it is it’s the feminine side of divine power that is marked by certain character traits that would be considered “signature femininity.” For some, that looks like what a “goddess” would move like. For me, it looks like what provides a balance to masculine energy in some very distinctive and impactful ways.

And while divine femininity has the ability to manifest itself in a myriad of different ways, today, what I want to tap into is how you can apply some of its traits to the gateway of your womb (your vagina) — because goodness, y’all, if there’s one thing that is powerful, sacred and definitely something that defines femininity on a whole ‘nother level, it’s the part of the body that brings forth life, not just literally…metaphorically too.

So, if you’re ready to honor your vagina by bringing it into more of a divine femininity kind of energy and atmosphere, here are seven traits of divine femininity that can help you to accomplish that very thing.

1. Creative

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I won’t lie. It’s kind of interesting that when it comes to learning what signature divine femininity traits are, not very many authors can agree on how many of them exist. I know that my first introduction to the concept at all was probably Queen Afua back in the day and her bookSacred Woman: A Guide to Healing the Feminine Body, Mind, and Spirit (the real ones know). Anyway, if there is one trait that virtually everyone can agree on is creativity.

Since being creative is all about bringing something new into existence, and one thing that women can do is birth life, that tracks. However, remember how I also said that wombs can be a metaphor? Even outside of children, we as women have the ability to “birth” all kinds of things — always remember that.

And how can you be more creative as far as your vagina (or vulva) is concerned? When’s the last time you tried a new pubic hair look or trend (check out “Yep. Pubic Hair Has Trends (And Specific Needs) Too.”)? When it comes to sexual pleasure, when was the last time you tried a new sexual position? If you’re wanting to keep your vagina in great shape, have you even attempted to use a yoni egg before?

As far as this particular divine femininity trait is concerned, the main thing to focus on is bringing “newness” to your vagina — it’s about reading and researching things that just might benefit her in ways that you never would’ve considered before.

2. Nurturing

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Something that we see in an emotionally healthy and spiritually sound mother is a woman who is very nurturing and loving. One definition of nurture is “to feed and protect.” Another? It is to “support and encourage.” At the end of the day, being nurturing is all about offering whatever will assist something or someone in being able to flourish and thrive.

When it comes to your vagina, what are you feeding “her” (check out “The Foods Your Vagina's Been Craving,” “10 Fall Foods That Are Really Good For Your Vaginal Health,” “This Is How To Eat Your Way To A Wetter (Yes, Wetter) Vagina,” and “Here’s What Your Vagina Wishes You Would Eat LESS Of”)?

How are you intentionally and proactively protecting her? Are you selective about your sex partners? Do you use condoms until/unless there is mutual exclusivity that’s established? Do you get tested for STIs/STDs on an annual basis (every six months if you’re engaging in casual sex)?

Do you support her by washing her properly (check out “Are You Washing Your Vagina Correctly? You Sure?” and “Love On Yourself With These 7 All-Natural DIY Vaginal Washes”) and getting her the type of underwear that she needs (check out “These Are The Kinds Of Panties Your Vagina Actually Prefers”)? Do you encourage her to live her own best life by giving yourself vaginal self-examinations, just to make sure that everything is “running smoothly” down below?

A part of the reason why I penned “Vaginas Are Like Plants. Here's What I Mean By That.” for the platform was to remind us all that nurturing our vaginas is essential — critical even. She takes good care of you, right? Acknowledge that by nurturing her right on back.

3. Forgiving

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Hands down, if there’s a top area where I see a ton of hypocrisy when it comes to relationships (and oh, there are plenty to choose from), it’s forgiveness. Because while some folks are out here acting like others aren’t “worthy” of it, at the same time, they want that kind of mercy to be bestowed upon them. Listen, I will tell you from very up close and personal experience that if you want to see karma (or sowing and reaping; however, you personally choose to frame it) up close and personally, try not forgiving someone. The way that thing will boomerang on you when you need it most? It never ceases to amaze me.

When it comes to not forgiving, I’m speaking of self-forgiveness, too. And when it comes to your vagina, specifically, not forgiving your vagina could include things like making poor sex decisions, not taking good care of your vagina (and vulva), and even not pampering it as you should. All being unforgiving does is harbor some level of bitterness and resentment — and that can make it hard to love yourself and others as deeply and fully (and consistently) as you should.

If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a billion times. One of my favorite definitions of forgiveness is by best-selling author Gary Zukav: “Forgiveness is accepting that the past can’t change.” What you should’ve done that you didn’t do? You can’t do anything about that. All you can do is learn, move forward, and do better. This includes the lessons learned surrounding your vagina. Please make sure that you do.

4. Sensual

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It’s kind of interesting that, when it comes to the words “lust” and “sensual,” (most) people think that they only refer to sex when that isn’t the case. Lust can be rooted in a strong sexual desire, yes; however, it can be a strong desire for anything, period — person, place, thing, or idea. And sensual? Being sensual is about being pleasing to all five senses: touch, taste, sight, hearing, and smell. While there is oftentimes at least a hint of sex that comes with that, something (or one) can be sensual without it.

So, keeping the sensual definition in mind, how can your vagina become more sensual? Let’s start with how much do you know about your vagina? Even outside of sex, do you take care of the “touch and sight” senses by holding up a mirror and feeling around — not just for potential health issues but just so that you can feel comfortable doing so? Do you know what different scents mean at various times of the month (check out “Ever Wonder What Different Vaginal Smells Mean? I Got You.”).

If you’ve ever been curious about what your vagina tastes like — hell, it’s basically a haven of probiotics on steroids. Try it. No one has to know. And as far as hearing goes (because I bet you were wondering how I was gonna tie that in) — try listening to some more when you’re bathing, relaxing, or pregaming for sex. There are studies to support that it can provide the same sensations as sexual pleasure. As a diehard music fan — I can totally get where they are coming from.

5. Kind

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At the end of the day, kindness is rooted in benevolence, and being benevolent is all about expressing goodwill and doing things that will ultimately benefit other people. If you look at this from the angle of being kind to yourself, this would include actions like loving yourself, comforting yourself, speaking highly (in a self-confident, not arrogant way) of yourself, believing in yourself, and fully accepting yourself. So, when it comes to your vagina, specifically, based on all of the definitions that I just provided — are you kind to her? You sure?

Out of all of the things that I said, I really want to encourage you to hone in on the “comforting” and “fully accepting” part. “Comforting” in the sense that sometimes yeast infections, bacterial infections, itching, and irritation happen. Sometimes, a poor decision might result in an STI/STD. Sometimes, you may not be putting as much proactive self-care into your vagina (and vulva) as you know that you should. Rather than get angry with yourself and/or at your vagina about that, comfort her.

Literally do things that will help to soothe her, like taking oatmeal baths, participating in apple cider vinegar soaks, applying carrier oils (like coconut, carrot seed, and sweet almond) that will help to bring relief to your vulvar skin — things like that. And as far as accepting her — I mean, that’s pretty much a complete sentence.

Just like snowflakes, no two vaginas are just alike, and there is no “wrong” way to have one as far as appearance goes, which means that your vagina (and vulva) was designed to be the way it’s supposed to be. You are able to boost your self-esteem (including your sexual self-esteem) by making complete and total peace with that very fact.

6. Collaborative

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A sign of being a woman who thrives in your divine masculinity is you are able to cooperate with other people. Chile…CHILE. I could do an entire article on this alone. Anyway, when it comes to your vagina, a great definition of cooperate is “to work or act together or jointly for a common purpose or benefit.” And by keeping this in mind, this is why I write articles like “Okay. Let's Make Some Vagina Resolutions This Year.” for the site. It’s basically a reminder that your vagina is just as relevant as the rest of your body, and so it deserves to have some plans made for it too.

So, when it comes to being… “vaginally collaborative” — take a moment to think about what you can do for your vagina that will help to accomplish some benefits for it — well, her. You know, a personal motto that I live by is if your mind, body, and spirit aren’t in agreement about a particular choice that you are about to make concerning a person, place, thing, or idea, you should pause because it’s a “trinity” that is designed to work in harmony.

And so, I encourage you to apply this way of thinking to your vagina. Whatever you’re about to do — is it going to help you and your vagina to accomplish some resolutions or goals that you’ve already set? Can your mind and spirit get on board? If not, it’s not truly a collaborative effort, and it is definitely something that you should rethink…before it’s too late.

7. Fertile

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Even though most of us think of offspring whenever the word “fertile” comes to mind, it’s super important to remember that the word also speaks to abundance, productiveness, and fruitfulness. Personally, I like the word “fruitful” because that’s all about doing things that will prove to be beneficial, useful, worthwhile, successful, and rewarding for you.

When a woman is walking in her divine femininity, she is laser-focused when it comes to making “fertile moves” when it comes to her lifestyle. And as this comes to a close, whether you desire (more) children or not — your womb and your vagina need you to also be conscious about doing what will be worth their while…what will ultimately prove to be more than short-term rewarding.

_____

An author by the name of Danielle LaPorte once said, “The divine feminine is the warrior and the healer in a womanly package.” A warrior shows great courage and a healer shows great compassion.

Your vagina needs both. Your vagina deserves both. You can give it both.

As you learn more about how to move in your own divine femininity, Black woman, please make sure that you do.

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