To say that this Gen-Z power player is taking the entertainment industry by storm is not only a clever pun, but the truth to say the least. The 19-year-old launched a bathing suit collection with PacSun. She has been featured in project after project consistently from her role as Gia in Euphoria to her latest appearance in HBO Max’s record-breaking series The Last of Us, and she’s a full-time sophomore at the University of Southern California. Damn, what can’t Storm Reid do?
The Georgia peach recently took her talents to another big screen feature alongside The Best Man: Final Chapters star Nia Long and Never Have I Ever breakout star Megan Suri for mystery-drama-thriller hybrid Missing. Starring as June, Reid’s character uses her wits and Generation Z intuition to track down her missing mother after an international trip to Colombia gone wrong.
Storm Reid and Megan Suri in 'Missing.'Photo Credit: Temma Hankin
When her mom (Long) goes off the grid, June uncovers some dark secrets about her mother, her mother’s boyfriend, and life as she knows it begins to unravel as she scours the internet with every site, app, and bugged camera possible to find her mother.
During a conversation with xoNecole, Reid got candid about working with the icon that is Nia Long for the Screen Gems-produced film, morning mantras and routines that keep her headspace sane while taking on multiple roles, and how she sets boundaries while she goes through adulting in the public eye.
xoNecole: How did June differ from any other character that you've ever played and how did it challenge you as an actress?
Storm Reid: I think June is really relatable, actually. She's just, at the end of the day, a young girl trying to figure out who she wants to be and how she wants to take up space in the world. Obviously, her given circumstances are way different from any of the characters that I've played. I love that June jumped right into action. And even though her and her mom butt heads and disagree, she will do anything that she can to find her mom. I think that's really important and something that I can relate to.
xoN: How would you say that this film highlighted the brilliance and innovation of Generation Z?
SR: I think that's what makes the movie work. That's what makes the movie so cool, relatable, and fresh because we do live in a social media era. To see this exciting movie with all of the technologies and social media platforms that we already use is really fun. To have an 18-year-old girl at the center of that story is a lot of fun, too, so I hope people enjoy it.
xoN: What was your experience like working with the icon that is Nia Long?
SR: Yes, like you said, she's an icon. I have grown up watching her so to be able to work with somebody that you've grown up looking at and admiring is really cool. She just is so lovely and she was so supportive of me on set and poured into me and really made me feel comfortable. I'm glad to have worked with her.
xoN: Another thing that I thought that was very interesting about the movie was that it was essentially shot in one setting. How challenging was it to shoot a movie that was all in one place, as opposed to projects you've done where you've been in scenes that were all over?
SR: It was a little uncomfortable because, like you said, I'm used to being in different places and having scene partners and not being confined to a screen in a little box. I think those challenges made me stronger as an actress and made me realize that I need to stop relying on the resources given to me. That being location, stage directions, scene partners, and even cameras. [Without that] you have to dig deep and bet on yourself and find the intersection of trying to be as grounded as possible but also portraying the emotional stakes. Thankfully, I think I was able to pull it off.
"I'm used to being in different places and having scene partners and not being confined to a screen in a little box. I think those challenges made me stronger as an actress and made me realize that I need to stop relying on the resources given to me."
Storm Reid and Nia Long attend the Stage 6 and Screen Gems world premiere of 'Missing.'
Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images
xoN: You've been in a lot of projects, but this movie is more of a suspense-thriller. How did you mentally prepare yourself and keep yourself in a good headspace while filming?
SR: It wasn't that hard. I think once I got the hang of the technical aspects, everything else came together and I just tried to step into my character's shoes and become them and not forget, like I said, their given circumstances, but also not neglect how I would feel in that situation. I'm glad that that was able to all come together and I was able to pull it off as seamlessly as possible.
xoN: 'Missing' really hones in on a relationship between mother and daughter. When it comes to you and your mother, how much does your relationship with her pour into you and put you into a positive headspace when it comes to the craziness of the entertainment industry?
SR: To be able to have my mom by my side is such a blessing. Even though I am growing up, I still love to have her around because she protects me, she's super supportive and she's mom. Anytime I'm feeling any type of way, I can go to her and we're going to figure it out. To be able to be on this journey with her is a really incredible experience and we've made beautiful memories and we'll continue to do so. I'm glad to have her around.
xoN: What’re some of the most important things your mom has ever taught you?
SR: She's taught me a lot, but being a good person has always been at the core of everything that she's taught us. Everybody has their bad days, but if you are trying to be a good person, have a good heart, and show up the best way you can in every situation, I think that's going to get people really, really far.
xoN: How do you continue balancing life as a full-time student and a full-time actress? Do you ever feel like you're not pouring yourself 100% into one or the other, or do you feel like you've established a balance?
SR: It is challenging and can be overwhelming, but I just try to give myself grace because I am doing a lot. I feel like I'm getting things done, giving 100% to both things, and I just have to remind myself that I'm trying the best that I can. I'm taking it one day at a time and I'm so blessed, and fortunate that I even have the opportunity to balance both a full-time career and going to school.
"I just have to remind myself that I'm trying the best that I can. I'm taking it one day at a time, and I'm so blessed and fortunate that I even have the opportunity to balance both a full-time career and going to school."
Storm Reid attends the Los Angeles premiere of HBO's 'The Last of Us.'
Rodin Eckenroth/WireImage
xoN: When you're off set, what are some ways that you like to stay mentally sane and what are some of Storm's self-care tools?
SR: I like being by myself. I love isolating myself to just take a moment to myself, whether that's in my room [or] listening to music in my car. Being with my friends and family obviously makes me so happy. I listen to a lot of music. I think self-care, for me, is intersected directly with listening to music. No matter what type of music, I need some noise. I need something to uplift my spirit [and] get me moving.
xoN: What does a morning routine look like for you and what are some of the mantras that you say to yourself to get yourself in a positive headspace?
SR: I try to start every day before I touch my phone and when I wake up, just say a prayer. Just to thank God that I'm alive and I'm able to breathe, move, get out of bed, and do whatever I need to do. It usually involves some turn-up music in the mornings, [which] is what I love to do and it's a great way to get my day started.
xoN: Speaking again about the many roles you’ve had, let’s talk about intentionality. How do you know when you're aligned with a role or a project? What do you look for when you're selecting what you want to do?
SR: I try to be as intentional as possible and purposeful as possible with my projects, but I think it has to align with my morals and my values and my art can't compromise who I am as a person, one. Two, I think as creative people we have the opportunity to say things and it doesn't need to be a preachy way, but if we're not saying anything, we're doing ourselves a disservice and doing audiences a disservice as well. I want art, or at least the art that I'm a part of, to be reflective of the real world, real situations, real stories, and that's what I really look for and will continue to look for.
"I want art, or at least the art that I'm a part of, to be reflective of the real world, real situations, real stories, and that's what I really look for and will continue to look for."
Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images
xoN: Is there any role that you haven't played yet that you have your eye on and want to explore?
SR: I'd love to do an action film one day. I think that would be really fun and maybe even try my hand at comedy. I think people are so used to seeing me serious and distraught and stressed out, like everybody else says. I think being able to be a part of a comedy one day would be really fun.
xoN: Have you ever said “no” to a role, and what made you want to set that boundary and pass on the role?
SR: Absolutely. I say no to things all the time because it just doesn't match up with the things that I want to do at the time. The creative team can be fantastic, but it doesn't match with the next role that I'm trying to play, or the script just didn't really move me in any way. I need to be impacted. If I'm not impacted, I don't feel like the audience is going to be impacted and then I just feel like it's going to be not good [or] not believable; it won't feel good. It's a case-by-case scenario.
xoN: What boundaries have you worked hard to set in place while growing up in the public eye as a young Black girl in entertainment? Whether it comes to roles, the privacy of your own life, or letting people in on social media, what boundaries have you said, "This is my limit" to?
SR: I think the privacy thing is a big one for me because I do share a lot, but I don't share everything. I am a firm believer of keeping some things private and keeping some things close to your chest and close to your heart. I think as long as people understand, yes, I'm here to share my life and share my family, my friends, my experiences, my travels, and obviously, the things that I work on, but I'm not going to share everything and I'm not perfect.
I'm perfectly imperfect. I'm not always going to say the right thing. I'm not always going to do the right thing, but it's important that people give me grace because other people get grace. So why can't people in entertainment or people in the limelight get that same grace?
Check out Storm in Missing, out in theaters now.
Featured image by Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images
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While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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Feature image by Leon Bennett/WireImage
Thinking about them kinda-sorta inspired this piece because they caused me to reflect on the times when some of my clients have come to me, semi-freaking out, and it was because their thoughts about someone had gone beyond “Hey, she’s pretty” or “Hey, he looks good.” Instead, they were starting to fantasize about certain folks, and they weren’t sure what to do about it, especially when some of those fantasies were transpiring while they were engaging in sex with someone else.
You know, it’s been reported that somewhere around 50 percent of people do indeed have fantasies about other people while having sex with another person. And that is definitely a high enough number to tackle some things about the topic here.
If you’re someone who fantasizes about other individuals, especially sexually, here’s some intel into why that could be the case, along with when it gets to the point and place where you might want to consider actually doing something about it.
What’s a Fantasy and What Exactly Causes Them?
GiphyWhenever you think of the word “fantasy,” what immediately comes to your mind?
Personally, what I find to be interesting is the fact that the dictionary says that there are actually a lot of things that can be considered a fantasy: your imagination, hallucinations, visions, ingenious inventions, illusions — I mean, there is even a genre of fiction that falls into the fantasy category. However, when it comes to what we’re going to discuss today, a psychological term for fantasy is “an imagined or conjured up sequence fulfilling a psychological need; daydream.”
And yes, before we get to the end of all of this, that definition is going to answer quite a few questions as it pertains to the topic of this particular piece. But first, more about the origin story of fantasies.
Apparently famed neurologist, Sigmund Freud spent some time analyzing fantasies and came to the conclusion that, more than anything else, a fantasy represents something that is either a suppressed urge or desire and when you stop to think about what you imagine, what your visions are, what you may long to invent — that certainly tracks. However, something that you should also keep in mind about fantasies is that, oftentimes, they are rooted in few boundaries and can even go well beyond what is considered to be reality (which is something that is based on facts and truth).
Oh, something else that needs to be kept in mind about fantasies is that they are typically relied on as a mental form of escape from something or someone (bookmark that).
And now that fantasies are more clearly defined, if your immediate question is, “Is it wrong to fantasize?” — no, I certainly don’t think that. What I do believe, based on what a fantasy is, though, is if you are fantasizing a lot about a particular person, place, thing or idea, it would be a good idea to ponder why that is the case — why is that a suppressed desire for you, why are you using that as a mental escape and perhaps, the most important question of all, does your fantasy come with any limits?
Now let’s build on top of this…
Now What Causes Folks to Fantasize About Other People?
GiphyAs I was doing more research on the topic of fantasies, I came across an article entitled, “What Happens In Our Brains When We Fantasize About Someone.” The author of it started the piece out by talking about a cool connection that she made with someone on a plane, only for her to find herself fantasizing about him once they parted ways. As she went deeper into her story, she mentioned a word that definitely needs to be shared here: heuristics.
If you’re not familiar with it, heuristics is simply a mental shortcut. For instance, if you find yourself needing to make a quick decision (check out “Before You Make A Life-Altering Decision, Read This.”), you may rely on heuristics to do it (even if it’s subconsciously). The challenge with that is oftentimes heuristics will only provide you with a limited amount of data and information, and relying only on that could cause you to not make the best choice, if you’re not careful. And boy, when heuristics jump into your fantasy space — well, something that immediately comes to my mind is celebrity culture.
Ain’t it wild how people will be on social media, speaking so confidently, about someone—or someone’s relationship—as if they personally know them (when they absolutely don’t)? I mean, just because someone is attractive or you’ve seen them carry themselves well in an interview or two, that doesn’t automatically mean that they are the ideal person or that they are someone to set your own dating standards by. If you’re not careful, though, heuristics and fantasies may encourage you to think otherwise.
That’s because the combo will try and get your brain to jump to all sorts of conclusions and, if you don’t keep that in check, it could result in you making premature, counterproductive, or even straight-up reckless decisions — because remember, a fantasy tends to be about suppressing an urge or desire.
Honestly, whether you are in a relationship or not, if you are fantasizing about a particular individual, understanding why you are doing that should definitely be explored.
However, if you are with someone and you’re fantasizing about someone else, you really shouldn’t ignore what is transpiring because, although by definition, there’s a good chance that whatever and whomever you are fantasizing about will never come to pass, the fact that it’s taking up some of your mental and emotional space, that needs to be acknowledged. Because if there is something that you want or need, and you seem to believe that your fantasies are better at supplying that for you than the reality of your relationship, why is that?
Let’s keep going…
What Does (or Could) It Mean If You Fantasize About Someone Else During Sex?
GiphyIt’s pretty common that a random song will come to mind whenever I’m writing an article. Today? It was Guy’s “My Fantasy.” Then a sitcom did — King of Queens, and the episode when Doug and Carrie were talking about his sexual fantasies. The song is about images that the fellas randomly have about beautiful women. The episode was about Carrie wanting to dictate to Doug what and whom he could fantasize about because some of his sexual fantasies made her feel uncomfortable or intimidated.
And both of these are a pretty solid intro into whether there is something wrong with sexually fantasizing about someone, especially while having sex with someone else. Well, before getting into all of that, I think another article that I read on the topic brings up a pretty good point — that it’s important to think about where your fantasies are coming from: your imagination, things you see on social media, porn that you may have watched, people who you actually know…and if it’s the latter, is it someone from your past or someone from your present?
Yeah, knowing the source of your fantasies can definitely help you to understand how “deep” into your fantasies you might be.
What I mean by that is, seeing a beautiful man one time and randomly thinking about what it would be like to have sex with him on some beach vacation is quite different than constantly thinking about your ex, the sex you used to have with him and then fantasizing about it For one thing, the beautiful guy, you will probably never have access to. That ex, though? Well, at the very least, that is a bit more realistic, right?
Then there’s the fact that, again, a fantasy is a suppressed urge or desire. When it comes to the beautiful man, is it his looks that you long for, or is it something deeper? And that ex of yours? Lawd, now why, when you have your own man in your own bed, is your ex “scratching some sort of itch”? Because we all know what they say — “he’s your ex for a reason,” so why is he creeping up into your intimacy space now that the relationship is over? Is something unresolved?
Are there sexual needs that he met that your current partner isn’t (check out “You Love Him. You Prefer Sex With Your Ex. What Should You Do?”)? Is something currently transpiring in your current relationship that you are using fantasies about your ex to escape from?
You see, although when it comes to the topic of fantasizing about others when you’re having sex with someone else might seem like the a cut-and-dried, “Don’t do it, end of discussion” — as someone who works with couples for a living, I think the bigger concern isn’t if another guy comes into your mind during sex with your partner…it’s more about WHY is that happening to begin with. Because if you need to escape from where you are, if you can’t be present with your partner, something is definitely up.
When Should You Be Concerned About the Fantasies You Are Having?
GiphyDuring the last several months of breaking up (because we all know that sometimes breaking up is a process) with the last boyfriend whom I will have in this lifetime, I recall fantasizing about other people while having sex with him. It’s because I really wasn’t attracted to or interested in him, sexually, anymore — but I was a bit fearful of what it would mean to let the entire relationship go.
And boy, is that a huge red flag because I wasn’t fantasizing about some random famous person one time during sex — I was relying on images, my imagination, and previous experiences with other people to literally get me through the act. NOT. GOOD.
Y’all, one of the greatest and most profound forms of communication and connection between two people is sexual intimacy, and so, when it transpires, it really should only be about the two of them. That said, should you freak out over a thought about someone who creeps up into your mind every once in a while? Chile, more people have that happen than they will ever admit out loud.
On the other hand, should you worry if you’re like I was? I’ll put it this way — you should definitely be concerned because the last thing that you should be feeling during sex with someone is like you are suppressing what you need and/or that you want to escape from the moments that you are experiencing with them.
And yet, if that is indeed the case, though, what should you do?
Start with doing some sex journaling. Write down your fantasies, the sources of them, and why you are leaning on them in this season (check out “The Art Of Sex Journaling (And Why You Should Do It)”). If they are tied to unrealistic situations, be real with yourself about that. If they are rooted in potential possibilities, do some journaling about how much you are “feeding into” that reality and what you think would be the wisest way to move forward, both for your sake as well as your relationship.
Talk to your partner. Each relationship is different, and so, while I’m not going to recommend that everyone just blurt out that they’ve been thinking about having sex with their co-worker or college sweetheart while having sex with their partner, I do think that the suppressed urges and desires (in general) should be mentioned. Sometimes, fantasies are birthed out of boredom (check out “If You're Not Having Great Sex, This Is (Probably) Why” and “Common Sex Problems Couples Have (& How To Fix 'Em)”) and doing something like creating a sex bucket list (check out “This Is How To Create The Best Kind Of ‘Sex Bucket List’”) can breathe new life into your bedroom.
Plus, sharing some of your deepest thoughts, feelings, and needs (in a kind, thoughtful, and mature way) can cultivate more emotional intimacy with your partner, and that can definitely be a good thing.
Consider seeing a sex therapist. If, after doing both of these things, the fantasies seem to be getting stronger and louder, you might need to make an appointment with a reputable sex therapist (check out “Have You Ever Wondered If You Should See A Sex Therapist?”). They may be able to help you to “connect some dots” about what’s going on that you wouldn’t have considered without their help, because sex therapists are trained in helping individuals sort out the mental and emotional sides of intimacy, not just the physical ones.
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Are fantasies bad? They aren’t. However, when it comes to sexual ones, a quote by Benjamin Franklin absolutely comes to mind: “If passion drives you, let reason hold the reins.”
And that, right there, should be a guiding message for how you should process the fantasies that you do have.
Amen? Sho’ you right.
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Featured image by Giphy