This Entrepreneur Secures Her $150K Bag By Blowing Someone Else’s
Money Talks is an xoNecole series where we talk candidly to real women about how they spend money, their relationship with money, and how they spend it.
Brittni Mealy is the ruler of her own universe - the Unicorn Universe, that is. As the creator and founder of clothing brand Unicorn Universe, the fashion enthusiast and serial self-starting entrepreneur went from working three jobs at once to being one of the most sought after talents and businesswomen in the fashion and luxury lifestyle space.
The Detroit native was so inspired by her own accomplishments that she wanted to pay it forward with a self-help book, Rich Bi$h Energy: A Self Love Guide To Millions, which was released in early October 2020. "I wanted to do this book because in my personal life, I had to realize that for your business and brand to be consistent, it starts with knowing your worth and setting the standard for how people should treat you. You have to have your mind and energy right in order to have your business right," Mealy told xoNecole.
Rich Bi$h Energy is said to hone in specifically on the relationship between finance and business and the art of self-love, manifestation and self-discovery. Ultimately, Mealy's work of literature is the phrase "create the life you love" in an interactive book with healthy growth-stimulating activities and self-love mantras. Regarding the correlation between self-love and financial security, Mealy shared, "If your peace of mind isn't right, your money isn't going to be right. If you have toxic people or toxic energy around you, you can't perform at your best."
In this installment of "Money Talks", xoNecole spoke with the Unicorn University HBIC about the importance of celebrating the little wins, her exit plan of selling her brand for millions of dollars, and being a dancer at a nightclub to provide for her two kids.
On the most rewarding and challenging parts of establishing Unicorn Universe:
"The most challenging thing I've encountered during my business was actually believing in my brand and knowing that I could be successful at it. Something else that was challenging to me was putting a team in place. I've missed out on a lot of opportunities in business because I was trying to do everything myself. When I finally got out of my own way, and put a team in place, I was able to flourish."
On how much she makes per month:
"$150,000/month. I try to save as much money as I can with my business (around $20,000 a month). I don't have a set number to save."
On her definitions of wealth and success:
"I define success as any goal that you've set out to do and you accomplish it. I feel like that is a reward within itself. I don't think people give themselves enough credit for taking the little steps towards reaching their goals. Small wins count too! Wealth to me is when you build your business or brand up to the point where you've created generational wealth for your family."
On the lowest she’s ever felt when it came to her finances and how she overcame it:
"I remember I was working a 40-hour/week job and I had two kids at the time and I wanted to fix up my kids' room, and I wanted to fix up my kids' bathroom, so I went to Walmart to go shopping for the items, and I didn't have enough to get everything. That was my lowest moment because I felt as though I couldn't provide for my kids.
"I started to hustle, I really got off my ass and started to make things happen! I knew I didn't want to live the way I was living and I knew I wanted to do better for my kids and myself so I started putting 100 percent into achieving my goal of becoming 'overly financially stable'. I took $500 and ordered my first wholesale pieces, and that's when I launched my first-ever online boutique, and being that I already had an Instagram following, I started promoting my business every day and telling as many people as I could about my business, and surely orders started coming in!"
Courtesy of Niya Skyy/Skyy Level Media
"I started to hustle, I really got off my ass and started to make things happen! I knew I didn't want to live the way I was living and I knew I wanted to do better for my kids and myself so I started putting 100 percent into achieving my goal of becoming 'overly financially stable'."
On her biggest splurge to date:
"I'm not a really big spender! I don't make too many crazy purchases. I get gifted a lot of things, and I like to say, 'Don't worry about how I'm having it, just know I'm having it, if you know what I mean.' I've just been fortunate enough to have it. The most expensive thing I've ever gifted was a car for my best friend, it cost about $15,000 and it was significant because she really needed a car at the time so she could get her kids back and forth to where they needed to go. I couldn't stand to see her struggling so I had to step in to help her."
On whether she’s a spender or a saver:
"When it comes to my coins I'm a saver, but when it comes to other people's coins, I'm a big spender! I do a great job at saving my money, I've always been a good saver. However, I've been blessed to be in situations where I haven't really had to spend my own money, such as certain relationships where my partner has taken care of a lot of expenses, which allowed me to save my money."
On her savings goals and what retirement looks like to her:
"Eventually, I would love to sell one of my brands for [millions]. That's my exit plan. I would like to sell my Unicorn Universe USA brand because it's become so popular now. We have dedicated shoppers that purchase anytime we drop a new collection, and it's turned into really a whole unicorn cult, where our customers really feel like they are a part of our unicorn community, so I definitely see that brand continuing to grown. I plan to sell the brand when by time I turn 40 hopefully."
On the importance of investing:
"I reinvest into my own company, because I know I have a strong enough following that I can always bet on my business! I also invest in stocks. My top two grossing stocks are Tesla and Zoom. Eventually I would like to get into real estate and invest that way."
On her intentions behind multiple streams of revenue:
"My intentions behind having multiple streams of income was because when one business gets slow, I always have a Plan B! Thankfully, I have three businesses that are all successful, but at least when one of them gets slow I know I'm not going to starve because I still have other income coming in."
Courtesy of Niya Skyy/Skyy Level Media
"Scared money doesn't make any money! I used to be nervous about investing large amounts of money into my business or spending a lot of money on inventory, but if you want your money to grow, you have to spend money to make money which is why I always invest back into my business."
On unhealthy money habits and mindsets:
"Scared money doesn't make any money! I used to be nervous about investing large amounts of money into my business or spending a lot of money on inventory, but if you want your money to grow, you have to spend money to make money which is why I always invest back into my business. After I started making money from my business and believing in my business, I became more comfortable with taking more risks in my business, and once I did that, everything started to go up from there."
On the craziest thing she’s ever done for money:
"I wouldn't say that this is crazy, but I did use to be a dancer in the strip club. I just remember dancing for $5 [per] song, and that was one of the lowest times of my life, but I had two kids to support so I had to hustle. I started dancing simply because I needed the money, and I needed money fast! I've always known I could dance and have a nice body, and I heard how easy it would be for me to make money so I decided to dance. I'm very open about me being a dancer before and I don't regret it because I did what I had to do to survive at the time."
On the worst money-related decision she’s ever made:
"Being scared, being timid, worrying about if people were going to support my business, instead of just focusing on my business early on in my career. I finally decided to trust my intuition after seeing that I was really, really good at designing. I kind of always knew I had a talent for fashion, but once I started getting custom pieces made and people loved them, I knew it was time to take that big step and move in to designing and honestly me trusting my talent changed my life!"
On her budget breakdown:
How much do you spend on rent?
"$4,500/month."
Eating out/ordering in?
"$2,000/month."
Gas/car note?
"$200 per month [on gas]."
Personal expenses?
"$5,000 per month."
For more information on Brittni, follow her on Instagram and shop Unicorn Universe.
Featured Image Courtesy of Niya Skyy/Skyy Level Media
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
When discussing the topic of raising children, discipline is often the first thing that comes to mind. Children need discipline. Full stop. But what is discipline? And how do we draw the line between discipline and revenge?
The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:
Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
Momo Productions/Getty
Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Courtney Hale/Getty Images