
Ava DuVernay Is The Energy Frequency I Want To Be On All Year Long

It was almost this time last year that I wrote "Wanna Start Your Own T-Shirt Line? 7 Pros Will Show You How" for the site. I make no apologies for the fact that I am borderline obsessed with a good unisex, Bella Canvas, T-shirt in a large, that has a great message on it. I just like how tees give you the ability to convey a message without saying a single word. Well, aside from the not-lucky-but-blessed sweatshirt, Black Dope Marriage Coach and Harpo, Who Dis Woman? tees that I recently copped, something that I've also been looking for is a T-shirt that represents a woman who I personally think handles herself in such a phenomenal fashion that her name is actually gonna be used as a verb in my life (like "Girl, you just Ava'd that!") all of this year —Ava DuVernay.
To get into all that she's accomplished as a filmmaker and film distributor would require more than just one article. For now, I'll just say that if you're a fan of the OWN series Queen Sugar, thank Ava. If the series based on the Central Park Five, When They See Us, completely moved to you to anger, then tears, then admiration for the strength of the five men in the story, thank Ava. Selma? That's what earned her the bestowed title of being the first Black woman to be nominated for a Golden Globe Award for Best Director and also best director when it came to the Academy Award for Best Picture in 2014. Maybe Black Love on your television screen is what you seek. Thanks to Ava, via her upcoming OWN drama, Cherish the Day, you're all set.
Honestly, to even begin to grasp all that Ava's accomplished, you'd need to get a glass of wine, curl up on the couch and review her Wikipedia page and website (not necessarily in that order either). For now, I'll just say that if you're a creative who's looking for some inspiration to breakout and do something that a shirt that I like says ("Keep Creating Dope Ass S—t 'Til Someone Notices"), unequivocally, Ava can serve as your muse. Case in point:
Can you tell I'm a fan? Indeed, I am. But today, it's not actually her resume that I want to get into. Rather, I'd like to simply take a little bit of your time to express why I personally find her name (Ava, if somehow you end up reading this, have you seen this T-shirt before? At first I thought it was about you) to be a verb—"a word that represents an action or a state of being". Because how she appears to move—as a woman who is gracious, focused, fearless, private and totally unbothered—is just how I want to handle whatever 2020 brings my way.
She's Gracious
To be gracious is to be "pleasantly kind, benevolent, and courteous". Even though Ava's Netflix series When They See Us did not earn a Golden Globe nomination (I'll touch a little more on that at the end of this piece), if you hop on over to Ava's Twitter page, you'll see her posting words of gratitude to folks like Brad Pitt and Robert De Niro for being co-executive producers on Selma and shouting out other accomplished individuals like Patricia Cardoso who is the first Latina director to be included in the National Film Registry at the Library of Congress. Interestingly enough, I'm not the only one who thinks that "gracious" is an appropriate adjective for her (click here for a really cool example).
There are a lot of narcissists in this world. Selfish and self-absorbed people too. It's a real gift if you've got the ability to still remember to be kind, to help others and shoot—to be freakin' polite. How cool is it that someone with the accolades that Ava has still makes the time to be thankful, supportive and to celebrate others? That is a trait all of us should have. No doubt about it.
She's Focused
If you want to see Ava in a not-so-formal setting, check out her Shine On with Reese (that would be Witherspoon) interview from 2018. She talks about her first job being at a yogurt place, working as a publicist and not even picking up a camera until 32. Something that really stood out to me is her expressing just how much she loves what she does and how, "Your change from one career to another doesn't have to be all at once. It definitely and should be progressive." She also talks about "cobbling through" her film school experience for herself without ever sitting in a classroom (I can relate. I flunked out of college twice and still became a writer; we'll have to talk about that on another day). Instead, she said that she watched over 200 DVD commentaries of directors and determined in her mind, "I only have what's inside of me, and I had to be able to tell myself 'That's enough'."
Talk about drive. Talk about ambition. Talk about focus. No wonder she's able to introduce us to a new project—not just project but quality project—every time we blink. No wonder she also has the time to advocate for others (see "Ava Duvernay Just Hired A 50% Female Production Staff For Her New Series On OWN"). She's a living and breathing reminder that when you are crystal clear about your purpose and how it is designed to affect as well as benefit other people, it's hard to get distracted by…fame, trolls, critics, obstacles or even your own self-doubt. Focus y'all. Stay. Focused.
She's Fearless
There is a doctor by the name of Ashish Patel who once said, "The elegance under pressure is the result of fearlessness." Man, if this doesn't embody Ava, I don't know what does because, looka here—if you never considered her to be fearless before, you should hang out on her Twitter page more often. Shoot, just the straight-up read alone that she dished out to Ms. Megan Kelly and the tweet she sent out to Jack (the CEO of Twitter) to hold y'all's president accountable are enough examples to remind us that our platform should be about more than stacking up followers. We should each use our gifts, talents, social media accounts and influence to stand up for what we believe in, to push back on things that we don't agree with, and to seek justice in the areas we are truly passionate about.
And what if we're disliked for it? Something tells me that Ava doesn't lose a lot of sleep over questions like that. Something tells me she's more in the lane of Margaret Thatcher—"If you set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything, at any time—and you would achieve nothing." That'll preach. A billion times over.
She's Private
I want to say that Ava tweeted it out herself sometime last year, but something that I find to be really cool about her is she's consistently active on social media; not her "team"—her. Still, you don't really know all that much about her personal life. Her Twitter bio says that she's (currently) a "Mom of 10" (she's referring to her creative babies). Her bio tells you that she's from Long Beach, California and her alma mater is the University of California. Still, you really don't know much more than that. Is she seeing someone? We don't know. What's her net worth? Rumors say that it's somewhere around (whew!) $60 million, but I've never heard her bring it up. We do know her age and, since she was born in 1972 (she's a Virgo, by the way), I totally get why she wanted everyone to nix the whole "Auntie Ava" thing. Per this tweet, I think she's a vegan. I'm assuming her favorite color may be black (only because I see her in it a lot). But really, what can we confirm?
And that's what I think is so dope. For the most part, all you know about Ava is related to her art—and her advocating for others; oh, and her sometimes putting folks in check. It's like she totally embodies a quote by an author named Katherine Neville— "Privacy—like eating and breathing—is one of life's basic requirements." To be able to pull that off in a world that is oh-so-very-nosey, 24 hours a day, seven days a week, is a feat within itself. Then to be able to be private in a way where folks feel connected to you without them being in all of your business? That's an art form. One that more of us could stand to adapt, don't cha think?
She's Totally Unbothered
*le sigh* The Golden Globes. Yeah, I'll spare y'all my soapbox thoughts on that awards program (or the politics of award shows, in general). What I will say is when I saw some of what was nominated while When They See Us was overlooked, I couldn't help but to immediately conjure up some of my own conspiracy theories. It really is crazy, just how much a lot of this world would rather be entertained—mindlessly so—than inspired. But you know what? I did get another Ava-related takeaway from it. If Omarion won the Totally Unbothered Award for 2019 (and he did), Ava has to at least be nominated for 2020. Just peep her tweet about the awards show (see above). Look at how she chose to look at it.
I don't personally know Ava, so I can't speak to why she's so calm, cool and collected about everything. But what I can do is speak to how her energy ministers to me personally—"Shellie, stick to your purpose, do your best and be your own biggest fan. If you commit to doing those things, not only will you be untouchable but unstoppable." Y'all, being unbothered is a superpower because it keeps you centered, balanced and able to keep pressing forward. We ALL need to be on that tip this year. Each and every one of us.
Something else that Ava once said is, "I love to see people just being regal in their own skin; it's just when they know who they are." Regal. Some synonyms for that word include royal, majestic and sublime. When you see yourself in this fashion, it's a lot easier to walk through this life, both online as well as off, yep—totally unbothered.
So yeah, call this a "jock piece" if you want. I don't care. The energy frequency that Ms. Ava DuVernay is on, that is what I totally aspire to this year. So, if somebody can point me in the direction of a really cool portrait T-shirt with her on it, I'd be grateful (sidebar, I'm on the hunt for a Yara Shahidi one too). For me, it's symbolic of the fact that you know you're truly on task when you motivate others.
Ava, big ups for doing that. Keep walking in your greatness, holding people accountable with your tweets and, in some ways, keeping us wondering. It's a part of your charm. Not only can I dig it. I totally appreciate it. It inspires me. It really does. Thank you.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
When They See Us: 5 Things You Didn't Know About The Central Park Five
What The Year Of 4 Has In Store For Your 2020 Energy
'A Wrinkle In Time' Is Representation Black Girls Need
Ava DuVernay Reps for 'All the Sisters' In Elle-- And It's Everything!
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'Sistas' Star Skyh Black On The Power Of Hypnotherapy & Emotional Vulnerability For Men
In this insightful episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Sistas star Skyh Black, as he opened up about his journey of emotional growth, resilience, and self-discovery. The episode touches on emotional availability, self-worth, masculinity, and the importance of therapy in overcoming personal struggles.
Skyh Black on Emotional Availability & Love
On Emotional Availability & Vulnerability
“My wife and I wouldn't be where we are today if both of us weren't emotionally available,” he shared about his wife and Sistas co-star KJ Smith, highlighting the value of vulnerability and emotional openness in a relationship. His approach to masculinity stands in contrast to the traditional, stoic ideals. Skyh is not afraid to embrace softness as part of his emotional expression.
On Overcoming Self-Doubt & Worthiness Issues
Skyh reflected on the self-doubt and worthiness issues that he struggled with, especially early in his career. He opens up about his time in Los Angeles, living what he calls the “LA struggle story”—in a one-bedroom with three roommates—and being homeless three times over the span of 16 years. “I always had this self-sabotaging thought process,” Skyh said. “For me, I feel therapy is essential, period. I have a regular therapist and I go to a hypnotherapist.”
How Therapy Helped Him Heal From Self-Doubt
On Hypnotherapy & Empowering Self-Acceptance
Skyh’s journey is a testament to the power of tapping into self-development despite life’s struggles and being open to growth. “I had to submit to the fact that God was doing good in my life, and that I'm worthy of it. I had a worthiness issue and I did not realize that. So, that’s what the hypnotherapy did. It brought me back to the core. What is wrong so that I can fix it?”
Watch the full podcast episode below:
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How A Group Chat Became A Game-Changer For Empowering Black Professionals In Sports
In 2016, Shaina Wiel started a simple group chat with friends and colleagues in the New York sports industry. What began as a space for professionals of color in sports to share resources and opportunities blossomed into the Minorities in Sports Business Network, a thriving community of more than 1,000 members and a full-fledged company shaping the future of sports business.
Shaina, who has held roles at companies including ESPN and the NBA and has taught strategic sports marketing at esteemed institutions like Georgetown University, officially launched the network as a business in 2019. Since then, it’s hosted high-impact events like the Toast to Black Sports luncheon during Super Bowl weekend and built student chapters at both HBCUs and PWIs to pipeline underrepresented talent into the industry.
She shared with xoNecole more on the early days of launch, the turning point that made her realize she had a platform with real influence, and what keeps her going. With 17 years of experience across agencies, teams, and networks, Shaina is proof that grassroots efforts can turn into transformative change—especially when backed by passion, vision, and community.
xoNecole: How did the Minorities In Sports Business Network come to life?
Shaina Wiel: So, I just started the group chat and added a few of my friends who work in the industry as well. We were all kind of in New York at the same time working in the sports space… Very quickly over the next few years, the chat grew to over 800 individuals within the chat. Then, we had over 1000 individuals.
xoN: What was your ‘aha’ moment to expand?
SW: I noticed a bunch of employees from the Big Four leagues— NFL, NBA, NHL, MLB— within my group chat had all started posting roles. And when I asked, 'What is going on? Why are there so many posting jobs within the group chat?' I was told that HR had sent a note to their Black Employee Resource Group and had told them they had heard about this group chat.
That's when I realized, ‘Okay, this is more than, you know, my little friend group chat. Let's see if we can turn this into an actual business. And then in summer, 2019 I decided to do this full time.
Brittany Dacoff
xoN: What was the transition like growing the group chat into a full platform offering membership perks like access to job listings, networking opportunities and more?
SW: I was working at an agency, and the agency had lost their account. It was the account that I was working on. So they were like, you know, we can try to find another or we can separate. I decided to leave. And then, as we know, COVID happened, which actually was a blessing in disguise.
I was able to really focus on building the vision with this group chat and turning it into an actual company, seeing what works, seeing things from an events and a relationship standpoint, in terms of like, how we were interacting with different partners from different companies, and actually turning that into something substantial that could last.
xoN: Speaking of events, talk more about what inspired the Toast to Black Sports event you held earlier this year during the Super Bowl. Why is it important?
SW: This was the second year. There are so many dope people of color, specifically Black people, who work in this industry who are just doing the work behind the scenes. They’re not getting their flowers. I took it upon myself to say, I want to celebrate you. We’ve honored Kimberly Fields, Esq. of the NFL, Kevin Warren, CEO of the Chicago Bears, sports executive Jason Wright, sports and entertainment vet Carmen Green-Wilson, and NFL coach Jennifer King—all of whom have made major contributions to the industry.
xoN: What do you enjoy most about your role today?
SW: I think the work that I enjoy the most, honestly, is with our college students. We have 12 chapters across different colleges and universities. We help eliminate some of the barriers a lot of us had coming out of college. What I love seeing is that we have students who are now looking at roles they never even thought of.
xoN: What’s a bit of career advice for women breaking into the sports industry?
SW: I would say, build relationships. That’s really it: Build authentic relationships. Make sure it's a give and take and that you're supporting other people because once you're building those relationships, then it's a lot easier to either get into a space or to have those conversations when you want to do something.
And always be willing and ready to do the work.
Featured image by Hosea Johnson