5 Tips To Successfully Get Yourself Off
Generally speaking, we all want to achieve "The Big O". Achieving orgasm is a regularly talked about topic amongst the opposite sex. It's also something that's pretty common for them to engage in; but it's just as important for women to enjoy "Masty Time" as men. Being comfortable in our sexuality as women is becoming more and more acceptable in society, however most women still have a hard time exploring the sexual and sensual side of themselves, out of sheer fear of the "judge and jury" side-eyeing the freaky things they may be into.
They don't want their deepest darkest fantasies put on display.
The cat's literally out of the bag when it comes to woman getting that climax she literally "OH" so desires. Studies show that about 75% of women never reach an orgasm with their male counterpart through intercourse. That's where doing the dirty solo deed comes handy. In order for women to be comfortable in their sex life with a partner, it's important that we discover and learn how our bodies work first. Exploring what you like and crave on your own time will surely help amp up your sex life with a partner.
If we aren't aware of the depths of what gets you off, how can you expect for another to take you to those heights? It's important that our solo grind is as satisfying as we'd like it to be.
1.Change Positions
Get creative with it. Bend that thing over, flip it, throw it, bounce and turn it over. Get in a comfortable yet desirable position that relaxes your body but still allows you access to hitting that good ol' G-spot. Every woman's body is different and laying on your back with two fingers or a toy may not get you to that ultimate climax. Getting in your favorite desired position and easing you mind and body could help you get to that ultimate "O".
2.Set The Mood (Lights, Camera, Action)
You have to treat "Masty Time" as if you would do any other sexual experience. It's essentially a self-care routine. You want to get the best out of the experience. Set the mood by putting on your favorite tunes on, change the ambiance with some dim lighting, light some candles/incense to help spark your aromatic senses. Even go as far as putting on your favorite type of adult flick. If you don't have one, explore what piques your interest. It's all about you in the moment. Do what you like.
3.Explore Your Imagination
This is the time for you to let your mind wander freely. There's no shame or judgment when it's just you enjoying yourself on your solo journey. You can literally take yourself to new heights of climax, if you let your mind drift to any scenario you imagine that turns you on. This is where the fun begins. Whatever freaky things you're into, imagine them. Doesn't matter with whoever, however, and whatever it is that you're imagining. The thing is, if your able to open your mind up, you could also open up those floodgates too.
4.Toys & Lube Galore, Oh My
Don't be afraid to "Do it with No Hands". Some women need a little extra stimulation downtown. Whether that be a toy, or you just like to feel like a Slip 'N Slide. It's all your prerogative. There's no right or wrong way on what you can and can't add to your sexy care time. Trying new things allows us to explore our bodies in different ways and also see what truly gets us going. This is of course done without the hassle of embarrassment of someone watching, judging you or knowing your deep dark fantasy. If you're looking to make things even wetter down there, check out article "The Wetter, The Better: A Simple Guide To Getting Off With Lube".
5.Know Your Parts
Knowing your lady parts will help you a lot when it comes to pleasuring yourself. Let's look at in simpler terms; we'll use a car as an example. You have thelabia aka "side mirrors"; just like on the cars, these are there to protect you from danger. The labia protects all your sexual organs. Don't apply too much friction there, you don't want irritation to arise. Then you have the "push to start button or the ignition" which is the clitoris. Just like in a car when you push or touch this area, it turns your engine all the way on. Then, you have your vaginal opening aka "your gas tank". This is where you'll fill yourself up, with toys, plugs or fingers. Just like a vehicle, you want to be extremely careful what you put in there as it could ruin the entire vehicle.
The uretha is also down there but that's more like the fluid you release on a windshield. The anus is like "the trunk". It's a compact compartment but you can cram a lot in there, just make sure you don't over-stuff the trunk; you don't want things slipping out of there, if you catch my drift.
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Corein Carter is a Los Angeles-based blogger, content creator and podcaster. The New Jersey native has had a love affair with words since she began penning poetry in high school and later went on to study journalism at WSSU. The self-proclaimed "Naturalista" embodies all things spiritual, plant-based, and self-care in both her daily life and through writing. You may recognize Corein's captivating voice and well-rounded perspectives from her fast growing podcast "Play on Words". Follow her journey on Twitter and Instagram @inlivingcolored.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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The Champion's Path: How Cari Champion Is Redefining Roles For Black Women In Media
Cari Champion has had many dream jobs. All of them have helped inform what she does and does not want for herself moving forward. “I get more and more curious. My dreams evolve. My desires change,” she said. “And I feel sorry for people who can’t experience that because it’s a beautiful feeling, it’s a beautiful challenge, and it makes you everything that you are.”
When we speak in late April, the journalist and media personality is preparing for a visit to Atlanta for The Black Effect Podcast Festival. The trip would allow her to spend time in a city that she said taught her a lot about herself and working in the media industry.
Champion was still early in her career when she worked for Atlanta’s CBS affiliate news station, where she was fired, reinstated, and subsequently quit after being accused of accidentally cursing on air in 2008. (“I didn’t. They knew I didn’t. I said ‘mothersucka,’” she said of the hot mic incident.) Still, the Los Angeles native insists she only has the fondest memories of her time in the southern city.
“I grew up in West LA, then moved to Pasadena, and those kinds of familial, tight-knit Black groups just didn’t exist. LA is spread out in a lot of ways,” she said. “To me, Atlanta ultimately built this woman that I am today and [is] why I speak so comfortably for us and for Black people. I had to have that entire experience.”
"To me, Atlanta ultimately built this woman that I am today and [is] why I speak so comfortably for us and for Black people."
It’s been 16 years since Champion moved from Atlanta and her career, as well as her desire to center Black voices in her work, has soared. After working as an anchor and court-side reporter for The Tennis Channel, she spent nearly a decade working as a host and anchor on ESPN for shows such as First Take and SportsCenter.
By the time she began hosting Cari & Jemele: Stick to Sports, on Vice TV with Jemele Hill in 2020, Champion had increasingly become determined to shun the notion that only sports reporters and athletes could credibly discuss sports. The Vice show featured guests such as LeBron James and Magic Johnson, but also Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist Nikole Hannah-Jones and Sen. Cory Booker.
At a time when America was reckoning with its racial history, Champion solidified herself as a trailblazer for Black women in sports media, as well as a crucial voice for cultural commentary. Today, she regularly appears on CNN discussing sports, culture, and politics.
Champion is now hosting the fourth season of the podcast Naked with Cari Champion on The Black Effect Podcast Festival, which is a partnership between iHeartMedia and Charlamagne Tha God, a media personality and a friend. “We kind of grew up together in this game. And when we first started figuring out or getting attention on a different type of level than we were used to, we learned a lot together,” she said of Charlamagne. “He put this network together for people who are beginning [and] people who are old-heads in the business. He wanted to make sure that all of us had a voice.”
It’s been an adjustment for a traditional TV reporter to transition into podcasting, but Champion said she’s found the medium to be a “much more freeing world.” When she’s speaking to guests such as talk show host Tamron Hall, singer Muni Long, or retired athlete Sanya Richards-Ross, she can “get lost in a conversation” and embrace a more casual environment than the structure of a cable TV show would allow.
Behind the scenes, Champion’s still doing her part to make sure there continues to be a pipeline of Black and brown women in journalism and beyond, too.
In 2018, she launched the nonprofit Brown Girls Dream and enlisted her celebrity friends to help mentor young women in a way that she felt she was never able to receive in the early years of her own career. “When I was at ESPN, I used to get all these emails from different Black and brown girls in the business. They wanted to talk to me about how they could [have the opportunity to] do the same thing [as me],” Champion said. “It fills my heart to see somebody actually get an opportunity to talk to somebody who can guide them through their career.”
Current Brown Girls Dream mentors include journalists Jemele Hill and Nichelle Turner, marketing executive Bozoma Saint John, and more. “These women are just the dopest ever and they take time out to give back to brown girls,” Champion said. “It’s special.”
When she reflects on representation in sports media roles, the Naked host said she’s inspired by the women of color she sees on television today. “I think women of color are doing great. It’s become more and more common to be on air and be Black girl magic,” she said.
“I think that the next level for us, in terms of Black and brown women in this business succeeding, is having true power over what our words are and what the content is,” she added. “Because, when push comes to shove and we want to really tell a story, we sometimes have to acquiesce, and we can't tell the story the way we want to. The next level is that we actually do have editorial control.”
"I think that the next level for us, in terms of Black and brown women in this business succeeding, is having true power over what our words are and what the content is."
Ultimately, Champion is still dreaming and looking to make an impact. She said she wants to eventually launch her own Black news network. “I would love to have a huge platform that focused on the stories that I think Black and brown women care about,” Champion said. “There are so many stories that are being missed.”
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Featured image Emma McIntyre / Staff/Getty Images