

No matter what your personal or spiritual views are on sex, I think if there's one thing that we all can agree on, it's the fact that if anyone should be gettin' it in, hot 'n heavy and on the regular, it's married folks. Yet, as a marriage life coach, I can tell you that most of the married clients that I have? They've got less than stellar sex lives when it comes to the kind (off the charts) and consistency (more than once every 6-8 weeks or so). Why is that?
I think a lot of it all points back to their wedding night. Did you know that reportedly only 48 percent of couples copulate on the same day that they say "I do"? Somehow, they make sure that their outfits are flawless, the DJ has an unbelievable playlist and the napkins on the tables match, yet somehow, once the wedding and reception are over, sex is not a top priority. Here's the thing about that. The word "consummate"? It means "to complete (an arrangement, agreement, or the like) by a pledge or the signing of a contract," "to complete (the union of a marriage) by the first marital sexual intercourse" and "to bring to a state of perfection; fulfill."
This means that a marriage can be annulled if two people have not consummated their union (had sex after getting married). Back in the old-school Jewish days, a reception didn't even get underway until the bride and groom went into a back room and had sex first. Why? Because only after sex/consummation were they considered to be "truly married".
My point? Sex is a big freakin' deal in a marital union, from the very day two people decide to become life partners. Yet unfortunately, there are way too many people who seem to agree with (or at least act like) the results of a survey I read on married sex—"6 out of 10 couples stated that marriage had completely ruined the excitement of having sex." (Wow and SMH.)
So, in honor of the beauty of marriage and the powerful-and-still-extremely-relevant purpose that sex serves in it, I wanted to take out some time to share 10 reasons why every married person reading this should be taking full advantage of their bed and the spouse that they share it with, just as often as they possibly can.
1. Sex Cultivates Oneness
It's always interesting to me whenever church folks try and say that the main purpose of sex in marriage is procreation. While that is a purpose (and benefit), there is something that came first in the Bible. What is it? Oneness—"Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed." (Genesis 2:24-25—NKJV) If you pay close attention to how things went down in the Garden of Eden, Adam and the Woman (her name wasn't "Eve" until after they left the garden—Genesis 3:20), while it does appear that they had sex, they didn't have children (that didn't happen until Genesis 4).
So yeah, oneness is what's paramount. A word that comes to mind when I think about two people becoming one through the act of sex is fusion—"the act or process of fusing or melting together; union". Union. Marital union. The tripped out thing about the fusion process is, even if you aren't big on the Bible, science backs this up too. When you get a chance, check out "We Should Really Rethink the Term 'Casual Sex'" and you'll see where I'm coming from. Singles, oxytocin is nothing to take lightly, and married folks, if you want to feel closer to your spouse, if you physically desire to "become one" with them, the transmission of oxytocin via sex is one way to make that happen.
2. Sex Is Great for Your Health
You can read articles like "Do You Swallow? The Unexpected Health Benefits of Sperm" and see that sex will definitely do your body good. However, even if you're not the biggest oral sex connoisseur, there are still a ton of benefits that come from sexual intercourse too. Sex reduces stress (more on that in just a sec), boosts your immune system, strengthens your pelvic floor and bladder, lowers your blood pressure, burns calories and can help to prevent prostate cancer when it comes to your hubby too. And that really is just the tip of the iceberg!
3. Sex Is the Ultimate De-Stressor
It is a proven fact that sex has a powerful way of reducing stress levels. For one thing, it releases endorphins and oxytocin so that you feel better. Sex also lowers the stress hormone cortisol in your system so that your blood pressure drops, you are less anxious, and you feel calmer. Deep breathing and climaxing also aid in making it so much easier to relax.
Being that heart disease, diabetes, headaches, depression, asthma and obesity are all health issues that are directly connected to stress, and because stress also affects our levels of productivity, concentration and effective communication, you can see why using sex to lower your stress levels is such a wise thing to do (especially morning sex!).
4. Sex Strengthens Communication
A few weeks back, I penned a piece on here about how to have a simultaneous orgasm with your partner. There are a few tips and tricks that are included; one of them is making sure that the both of you communicate with one another. What do you like? What do you want more of? What gets you there and what is a totally turn-off? (Another article that can make achieving this easier is "10 Sex Resolutions Every Married Couple Should Make".)
While it might be true that not everyone is a "dirty talker" in the bedroom, dead silence—even if it's before or after the act—isn't encouraged. For some couples, life is so hectic that the only time uninterrupted conversations can happen is in the bedroom. And sex? Sex is a form of intimacy and a gateway to feeling warmth, affection and nurturing from your partner. So, even if there's no dirty talk during, be open to some pillow talk afterwards.
Something that leads to divorce is poor communication. Something that can enhance communication is sex. This is a reality that definitely shouldn't be taken lightly.
5. Sex Is a Relational Responsibility
This is a point that gets overlooked way too much. That said, I'd venture to say that if there is one thing that having sex as a single person does, it's that it sets us up to be very sexually self-centered. For the most part, we only think about sex as it relates to what we want and our needs. But when we make the decision to join our lives with another individual, their wants and needs become extremely important too. Sex is no longer solely on our feel-like-it-only terms; in many ways, it becomes a staple and necessity in order to keep the bond between us and our spouse healthy, solid and strong.
A married guy that I interviewed last year on this very topic probably said it best: "When I was single, gettin' some was more like a challenge. Now that I'm married, it's a responsibility. It's not just about me or when I'm in the mood for it. It's about genuinely caring about the wants and needs of my partner too."
I've read before that a sexless marriage can sometimes be grounds of divorce based on what is known as "constructive abandonment" (I recently read that a lack of sex can cause a spouse to feel not only abandoned but betrayed too). So long as both people are physically able and there is no abuse involved (of any form), I can get why someone who has sex less than 10-15 times of year—especially year after year—would consider calling it quits. A sexless marriage is not a healthy one. In it, reciprocity is severely lacking. And in many ways, that is an irresponsible approach to marriage.
6. Sex Discourages Infidelity
I remember a woman once said to me that so long as you give a man two different pieces of something, he will never stray—a piece of a good meal and a piece of well, you know. Although she was married for close to two decades, she's divorced now. One reason why is because her husband ended up cheating on her. So no, by no means am I saying that sex will guarantee an infidelity-free relationship.
What I will say, though, is many husbands have told me that the difference between looking at another woman and thinking, "Hmph. She's pretty" vs. "Hmm, I wonder what she's like" is what their sex life is like at home. As one husband once said, "You tend to not want anything to eat unless you're hungry." Hey, you might want to push back on that, but most of the couples I've dealt with where infidelity was involved, very little bedroom action (on the front end) was a common thread.
Even the Bible acknowledges that sex can keep "outsiders" out of a married couple's bond. If you don't believe me, check out I Corinthians 7:1-5 sometime. It's quite…enlightening.
7. Sex Is a Source of Healing
Healing is such a soothing kind of word. It means "to make healthy, whole, or sound; restore to health; free from ailment" and "to free from evil; cleanse; purify". As I was reading an article by a licensed therapist and author entitled "The Three Kinds of Sex", healing is exactly what came to mind. Basically, what she said is "sealed-off sex" is basically about you gettin' yours, "solace sex" is sex that you have when you're looking for some type of reassurance and "synchrony sex" is the kind of sex that provides the type of wholeness, restoration and purification that married couples should strive for. It's about the kind of sex that bonds you to your partner, makes you feel safe in their presence and provides you with a combination of both eroticism and joy. It's the type of sex that makes you feel loved, desired and completely nurtured.
Who doesn't feel better—mentally, physically and emotionally—after an experience like that? And, who doesn't want to feel that way, just as much as possible?
8. Sex Is a Form of Worship
Roll your eyes if you want to, but I know married couples who say grace before engaging in sexual activity. And yes, I mean a literal, "Heavenly Father, for what we are about to partake of, we are truly grateful. Please bless this entire experience. Amen" kind of prayer. If that seems sacrilegious and if you're a believer of the Bible, I don't know how it could be because the Good Book has sex all up in it. Even if you're not religious, science co-signs on sex being a spiritual experience as well. There are studies to support that the bonding hormone oxytocin actually causes men to feel connected to a higher power whenever elevated amounts of it is in their system.
Since oxytocin is at its peak during an orgasm, sex is definitely a spiritual experience; probably one of the most powerful ones that there is. Don't @ me on this. The Bible and science have my back. There is absolutely no need.
9. Sex Conveys Love, Desire and Selflessness
I know some pretty "'bout it, 'bout it" fellas who, not only have absolutely no intentions on ever settling down, they probably couldn't figure out how many partners they've had if somebody offered them a million bucks to do so. Still, every single one of them admit that sex with someone they care about tops sex with a "random" any day of the week.
An article entitled "The Differences Between Hook-Up Sex, Marital Sex, and Making Love" sheds some light into why. According to the author, with hook-ups, it's all about using someone else's body for your own pleasure; marital sex comes from a place of emotional connection and intimacy (although conflicts and disagreements can sometimes get in the way), and making love is "…when you treat each other as equal human beings within your daily relationship, and you're transparent about your inner life and emotions, you automatically feel more stimulation and excitement with each other. When you feel connected as equals and yet engage each other as separate, distinct individuals as well, that generates new energy and it enhances the sexual energy between the two of you."
I think the reason why virtually all of us prefer sex in a committed relationship is because when someone stands before you and declares that they've got your back, through thick and thin, no matter what, there's a safety in that. It goes beyond desire, to love and the purest form of selflessness. Commitment doesn't get any realer than when it comes to marriage.
10. Sex Can Get You Through “It”
Another interesting read on the topic of married sex is "How Often Married Couples Have Sex After 5, 10, 20, 30 Years Together". There is a wide range of answers, for sure. As I was reading that some couples still get it on 3-4 times a week, even after many years have passed, I thought about what I tell husbands and wives in my sessions—"With all of the responsibility that comes with marriage, married folks deserve sex!" Do you know what a lot of them tell me in response? Sometimes it's the pure pleasure of sex that gets them through the tough times.
"I've never understood why wives will withhold sex to make a point," one wife said to me. "Sounds to me like the sex isn't that good because if there's one thing I'm not gonna do in my marriage bed is deprive myself of what goes on up in there!" Good for her.
And when you think of all that was shared about marital sex in this lil' write-up, hopefully more of you can relate to what she said than not. Again, if sex is for anyone, it's married folks. It's pleasurable. It's fulfilling. It's also extremely necessary. For all of these reasons and more.
Wives (and husbands) reading this, from the very bottom of my heart, GET. YOURS. OFTEN.
Trust me, if I was married, I would be. Straight up.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
Maintenance Sex Could Be The Key To A Successful Marriage
10 Sex Resolutions Every Married Couple Should Make
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney & Jill Marie Jones On 'Games Women Play' & Dating Over 40
What do you get when you mix unfiltered truths, high-stakes romance, and a few well-timed one-liners? You get Games Women Play—the sizzling new stage play by Je’Caryous Johnson that’s part relationship rollercoaster, part grown-woman group chat.
With a powerhouse cast that includes Claudia Jordan, Demetria McKinney, Jill Marie Jones, Carl Payne, Chico Bean, and Brian J. White, the play dives headfirst into the messy, hilarious, and heart-wrenching games people play for love, power, and peace of mind. And the women leading this story? They’re bringing their whole selves to the stage—and leaving nothing behind.
From Script to Spotlight
The road to Games Women Play started over 20 years ago—literally.
“This script was written 20 years ago,” Jill Marie Jones said with a smile. “It was originally called Men, Money & Gold Diggers, and I was in the film version. So when Je’Caryous called me to bring it to the stage, I was like, ‘Let’s go.’” Now reimagined for 2025, the play is updated with sharp dialogue and modern relationship dynamics that feel all too real.
Demetria McKinney, no stranger to Je’Caryous Johnson’s productions, jumped at the opportunity to join the cast once again. “This is my third time working with him,” she shared. “It was an opportunity to stretch. I’d never been directed by Carl Payne before, and the chance to work with talent I admire—Jill, Claudia, Chico—it was a no-brainer.”
Claudia Jordan joked that she originally saw the role as just another check. “I didn’t take it that seriously at first,” she admitted. “But this is my first full-on tour—and now I’ve got a whole new respect for how hard people work in theater. This ain’t easy.”
Modern Love, Stage Left
The play doesn’t hold back when it comes to the messier parts of love. One jaw-dropping moment comes when a live podcast proposal flips into a prenup bombshell—leaving the audience (and the characters) gasping.
Demetria broke it down with honesty. “People don’t ask the real questions when they date. Like, ‘Do you want kids? How do you feel about money?’ These convos aren’t happening, and then everyone’s confused. That moment in the play—it’s real. That happens all the time.”
Jill chimed in, noting how the play speaks to emotional disconnect. “We’re giving each other different tokens of love. Men might offer security and money. Women, we’re giving our hearts. But there’s a disconnect—and that’s where things fall apart.”
And then Claudia, of course, took it all the way there. “These men don’t even want to sign our prenups now!” she laughed. “They want to live the soft life, too. Wearing units, gloss, getting their brows done. We can’t have nothing! Y’all want to be like us? Then get a damn period and go through menopause.”
Dating Over 40: “You Better Come Correct”
When the conversation turned to real-life relationships, all three women lit up. Their experiences dating in their 40s and 50s have given them both clarity—and zero tolerance for games.
“I feel sexier than I’ve ever felt,” said Jill, who proudly turned 50 in January. “I say what I want. I mean what I say. I’m inside my woman, and I’m not apologizing for it.”
Demetria added that dating now comes with deeper self-awareness. “Anybody in my life is there because I want them there. I’ve worked hard to need nobody. But I’m open to love—as long as you keep doing what got me there in the first place.”
For Claudia, the bar is high—and the peace is priceless. “I’ve worked hard for my peace,” she said. “I’m not dating for food. I’m dating because I want to spend time with you. And honestly, if being with you isn’t better than being alone with my candles and fountains and cats? Then no thanks.”
Channeling Strength & Icon Status
Each actress brings something different to the play—but all of them deliver.
“I actually wish I could be messier on stage,” Claudia joked. “But I think about my grandmother—she was born in 1929, couldn’t even vote or buy a house without a man, and didn’t give a damn. She was fearless. That’s where my strength comes from.”
For Jill, the comparisons to her iconic Girlfriends character Toni Childs aren’t far off—but this role gave her a chance to dig deeper. “If you really understood Toni, you’d see how layered she was. And Paisley is the same—misunderstood, but strong. There’s more to her than people see at first glance.”
Demetria, who juggles singing and acting seamlessly, shared that live theater pushes her in a new way. “Every moment on stage counts. You can’t redo anything. It’s a different kind of love and discipline. You have to give the performance away—live, in the moment—and trust that it lands.”
Laughter, Lessons & Black Girl Gems
The show has plenty of laugh-out-loud moments—and the cast isn’t shy about who steals scenes.
“Chico Bean gets a lot of gasps and laughs,” Claudia said. “And Naomi Booker? Every scene she’s in—she’s hilarious.”
But the play isn’t just about humor. It leaves space for reflection—especially for Black women.
“I hope we get back to the foundation of love and communication,” said Demetria. “A lot of us are in protector mode. But that’s turned into survival mode. We’ve lost softness. We’ve lost connection.”
Claudia agreed. “We’re doing it all—but it’s not because we want to be strong all the time. It’s because we have to be. And I just want women to know: You can have peace, you can be soft. But stop bringing your old pain into new love. Don’t let past heartbreak build walls so high that the right person can’t climb over.”
Final Act: Pack the House
If there’s one thing this cast agrees on, it’s that this play isn’t just entertainment—it’s necessary.
“Atlanta is the Black entertainment hub,” Claudia said. “We need y’all to show up for this play. Support the arts. Support each other. Because when we pack the house, we make space for more stories like this.”
Games Women Play is more than a play—it’s a mirror. You’ll see yourself, your friends, your exes, and maybe even your next chapter. So get ready to laugh, reflect, and maybe even heal—because the games are on.
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Be Careful. Those Casual Friendships Can Be Red Flags Too.
A couple of weeks ago, I was listening to someone vent about an area of frustration that they couldn’t seem to get to the root of — why they keep getting taken advantage of by certain individuals. When you’ve been a life coach for as long as I have (and you were a journalist before that), you learn how to ask certain questions that can cause people to consider things that they may never have before.
So, when I asked her, “What is the common thread with all of those folks? And sit still for two minutes before answering,” when she finally heard her own self speak, her eyes got wide and her mouth dropped open: “They’re all people who I’m not really sure what they are in my life.”
Ding. Ding. DING.
A life coach by the name of Thomas Leonard once said that “Clarity affords focus” and, believe you me, when it comes to dealing with other human beings, if you don’t get clear on where you stand when it comes to your interactions with them, you can very easily find yourself “focusing too much” on those who don’t deserve it and too little on those who absolutely do. And y’all, this lil’ PSA couldn’t be more relevant than when it comes to what I call “casual friendships.”
Let’s dig — and for some of us, dig our way out of — what it means to have a casual friend, so that you can get clear on if you really need those in your life…and if so…why?
Article continues after the video.
It Can’t Be Said Enough: Always Remember What “Casual” Means
There’s a reason why I decided to share two videos by mental health coach Isaiah Frizzle at the top and bottom of this article. It’s because a lot of what he shares in both of them complements a piece that I wrote for the platform last year entitled, “This Is Just What Purposeful Relationships Look Like.”
It’s the author M. Scott Peck who once said, “Until you value yourself, you won't value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it” and please believe that the older (and hopefully more mature) you get, the more you tend to see just how valuable — and fleeting — time is; and that is what plays a huge role in motivating you want to only involve yourself with people, places, things and ideas that will honor your time — and when something is casual? In my opinion, it’s highly debatable that it’s worth much of your months, days, hours, or even too many of your minutes.
The main reason why is addressed in an article that I wrote back in the day entitled, “We Should Really Rethink The Term 'Casual Sex.'” The gist? When it comes to relationships, “casual” is certainly not a favorite word of mine because I know what it means. Have mercy — why would you want to invest your time, energy, and emotions into something that is, by definition, apathetic, indifferent, careless, lacking emotional intimacy, and/or is without purpose?
I don’t know about y’all but that sounds like a complete and total crap shoot to me — especially if you are going to go so far as to consider this type of dynamic a true friendship (check out “Ever Wonder If A Friend Is Just...Not That Into You?,” “6 Signs You're About To Make A Huge Mistake In Making Them A Close Friend,” “5 Signs Of A Toxic Friendship That Is Secretly Poisoning Your Life,” “12 Friend Facts That Might Cause You To Rethink (Some Of) Your Own,” and “Less & Less Of Us Have Close Friends These Days. Why Is That?” ).
To me, when you decide to call someone “friend,” it means that they are loyal, reliable, consistent, trustworthy and willing to be there to support you to the very best of their ability — even if it’s inconvenient to do so sometimes (check out “Life Taught Me That True Friendships Are 'Inconvenient'”). How in the world can you expect that from something that has the word “casual” in it?
And you know what? That actually segues into my next point about casual friendships pretty darn well.
Ponder the Purpose “Casual Friends” Serve in Your Life
A couple of years ago, Verywell Mind published an article entitled, “How the 4 Types of Friendship Fit Into Your Life.” The four that it listed were acquaintances (which I actually don’t consider to be friends; check out “6 Differences Between A Close Acquaintance And An Actual Friend”), casual friends, close friends, and lifelong friends. After reading the piece, I think they consider casual friends to be the “pleasure” friends that I mentioned in the article, “According To Aristotle, We Need ‘Utility’, ‘Pleasure’ & ‘Good’ Friends.”
And although I certainly get that, I think my “cause for pause” is calling those people “friends” when they probably should be called something like an associate or possibly even a buddy instead. Why do I feel this way? Well, I’ve shared in other articles that I think social media has jacked up vocabulary words and their true meaning on a billion different levels.
Take “friend,” for example. Facebook had us out here calling everyone we connected to on their platform “friends” when some of them, we’ve never even spoken to before — and I personally think that influenced, affected and perhaps even infected our psyche to the point where we will call folks, both online and off, “friend” even when they haven’t earned it and/or who possibly don’t deserve it.
That said, do I think that we all could use lighthearted interactions that don’t go very deep and are filled with not much more than fun? Sure. However, if we were to move this over into a sexual thing — those types of people would probably be called a sneaky link, and there is nothing significant or substantial about ‘em. In fact, if anything pretty much automatically comes with an expiration date, sneaky links would have to be it.
And that’s kind of the point that I’m trying to make about a casual friend — so long as you know that the word “casual” is being used to describe them, while you may enjoy the people who fit that bill, they aren’t really anything that you can or even should fully rely on. Instead, take them for what they are and don’t really expect much more than that. Otherwise, you could be in for some profound levels of disappointment. And who wants that?
Final point.
How a Casual Friend Can Become a Huge Red Flag
I’m telling you, y’all gonna quit clowning Tubi. LOL. To me, the best way to describe it is it’s the Cricket of current streaming apps. What I mean by that is, back when Cricket (the cell phone service) first came out, people, like me, who used it service got incessantly clowned because it was seen as a bootleg provider. Now it’s owned by AT&T, and as someone who has rocked with them since I was in my 20s, I don’t have one regret for doing so. Cricket has always been good to me, chile.
And Tubi? Well, when you get a chance, check out CNBC’s article, “CEO at 33, Tubi’s Anjali Sud on success hacks she learned at Amazon, IAC on way to top of Fox streaming” — take note of the moves the streaming app is making and the quality of programming that is transpiring in real time.
Anyway, I find myself bringing up Tubi more and more in my content because it helps to amplify some of the points that I like to make. This time, it’s a movie that’s (currently) on there calledRight Man, Wrong Woman. If you haven’t seen it before, I don’t want to give too much of the film away. What I will say is that the main female character, she had a casual friend and then she had a close friend.
That casual friend—the one who liked to kick it all of the time—was a lot of fun; however, dealing with her came with a ton of semi-unforeseen consequences. Meanwhile, the close friend? She’s what the Aristotle article (that I mentioned earlier) would call the “good friend” because she tried her best to hold her friend accountable.
And really, it shouldn’t be a shock that the casual friend turned out to be a plum trip because if someone is loads of entertainment and pleasure and yet they are indifferent towards you, they make careless decisions around you and/or they don’t really make known the purpose for you being in their life other than to pass some time — where really do you and that person have to go past drinks after work or dinner on a rooftop restaurant from time to time? And if that is all that the two of you are doing, again, why are they deserving of the word “friend”?
Hmph and don’t get me started on the lack of reciprocity that typically transpires when it comes to dealing with people like this because, while they won’t mind you spending your coins on them, taking their calls in the middle of the night or listening to all of their issues — when it comes time for them to show up for you, they very well may gaslight you into thinking that you are being dramatic, clingy or “doing the most.” Why? Well, it’s mostly because the two of you never really established what the hell the both of you are to one another.
And so, while you’re somewhere taking them seriously, they are out here seeing you casually, and as much as it might hurt to hear, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily make them a bad person. You shouldn’t expect much where no clarity is involved. After all, casual is just that: CASUAL.
____
I’m hoping that you can now see why I entitled this piece in the way that I did. It’s because a red flag is pretty much a warning, and to me, a casual friend is about as big of an oxymoron (again, to me) as casual sex is. Friends and sex are both too intimate to be seen or treated casually. Oh, but if you step out and take that risk, you could find yourself getting far more involved than the other individual ever wanted to go, because casual is how things have always been. “Friend” was simply to get you more mentally and emotionally invested. SMDH.
American columnist Walter Winchell once said, “A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” A wise person once said, “One good friendship will outlive forty average loves." Former President Ulysses S. Grant once said, “The friend in my adversity I shall always cherish most. I can better trust those who helped to relieve the gloom of my dark hours than those who are so ready to enjoy with me the sunshine of my prosperity.” Does any of this sound casual to you? Yeah, me neither.
Again, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t have people in your life who aren’t on deep levels. I’m just saying that you might want to consider putting them into another category than friend, because what friends do for people? There ain’t nothin’ even remotely casual about it, sis. Not even a lil’ bit.
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