There are two reasons why every human should be thankful for pubic hair. For one thing (and this is especially the case for women), although they say that a little extra weight in the genitalia region provides more “cushion for the pushin,’” that actually applies to pubic hair too; the reason why is it helps to make the friction that comes with intercourse a more comfortable experience. Another reason to appreciate pubic hair? It can decrease the chances of infections being transmitted, including STIs/STDs.
To me, both of these provide enough just cause to want to share additional information on pubic hair, just as much as I possibly can. And while in the past, I’ve tackled things like, “Here Are The Pros And Cons About Different Types Of Pubic Hair Maintenance,” “Pubic Hair Turning White? It Could Mean More Than Just Aging.,” and “Yep. Pubic Hair Has Trends (And Specific Needs) Too.,” today I’m going to get into some things that you may have randomly questioned about your vulva’s hair that you didn’t know who (or how) to ask about.
Are you ready to learn more about pubic hair than you’ve possibly ever known before? Here ya go.
1. Pubic Hair Is Darker than the Hair on Your Head
It’s pretty common for pubic hair to be darker than the hair that is on your head. One reason is because its cuticle layers are thicker. Another is because the melanin that is in the hair follicles that are on your head is less than the melanin that is in the hair follicles that are around your genitalia. Then, once your hair follicles start to die off and less melanin is produced, your pubic hair starts to turn white or gray. It’s pretty common for you to see your first gray pubic hair in your 30s or 40s, by the way.
2. Pubic Hair Can Only Grow but So Long
If you’ve ever wondered what would happen if you never trimmed your pubic hair, for most people, not much. And by that, I mean that pubes tend to stop growing somewhere between ½”-1 ½ “; that’s because its growth cycle phase is much shorter than the one on your head.
3. Pubic Hair Makes Sex Feel More Comfortable
Here’s an interesting way to look at pubic hair — some health experts refer to it being a form a dry lubricant because it’s so much easier for hairs to rub against each other than skin. And when you’re having sex with someone, you definitely want the movements to be as effortless and comfortable as possible. So yes, if you’ve heard somewhere that pubic hair reduces friction during intercourse, that’s not a myth; that is absolutely correct.
4. Pubic Hair and Pheromones Work Hand in Hand
Since pubic hair is thicker, that explains why it tends to be a different texture from the hair that is on your head as well. And the curliness of it? That can actually work in your favor…at least as far as bedroom activities are concerned. That’s because some health experts believe that the curls of pubic hair make it easier for them to trap the kind of pheromones that make you more (sexually) appealing to your partner.
And since many men tend to really enjoy the natural scent of a healthy woman’s vagina while a man’s pheromones help to put women in a better mood while making her hornier in the process — well, those both sound like good reasons to keep at least a little curly hair going on down there.
5. A Good Amount of People Remove Hair Before Sex (Especially Oral Sex)
Several years back, while I was in a session with a married couple, the wife mentioned that she was glad that she was finally receiving cunnilingus more often. What the husband immediately said in response, I must admit, it tickled me: “Well, that’s what tends to happen over here when the jungle turns into a golf course.” He’s not alone in feeling that way, either, because studies reveal that most people are likely to receive more oral sex when they groom regularly, down below.
What I find to be interesting is what that actually looks like based on gender. While a whopping 73 percent of men prefer that there is no (pubic) hair on a woman, only 56 percent of women prefer that to be the case (personally, I am not one of them; I just need things to be well-manicured). Something that didn’t surprise me is the fact that young people seem to be more caught up in all of this than older people are. That tracks.
6. Shaving Is Most Preferred. Waxing Isn’t As Popular As You Might Think.
Several years back, a study on pubic hair was conducted at the University of California-San Francisco. A little over 3,300 women between the ages of 18-65 were asked about their pubic hair maintenance practices, and 62 percent said that they either shaved or waxed off all of their pubic hair, while 22 percent trimmed, and only 16 percent did nothing. Their findings also revealed that going completely bald was most popular among white, college-educated women.
Meanwhile, a similar study was conducted at the Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology at the University of Texas. It featured almost 1,700 women between the ages of 18-40. What they shared is that 77 percent preferred to remove pubic hair by shaving it off, while only 16 percent waxed, which is kind of a trip when you think about how popular the Brazilian wax continues to be. Hmph.
7. Pubic Hair Can Intensify Clitoral Stimulation
If you’ve ever attempted plucking a pubic hair (maybe because one is ingrown or something), you already know how uncomfortable that is. That’s because each pubic hair follicle is attached to a nerve, and that is what makes this point make so much sense.
Yet one more reason why you might want to keep some pubic hair around is if your partner gently pulls or tugs on the ones that are on your pubic mound, that could actually intensify how stimulated your clitoris becomes. Try it. You just might like it.
8. Pubic Hair Needs an Exfoliant and Conditioner
As for me personally, when it comes to self-care and maintenance for my skin, two things that I try to get a few times a year is a back facial and a vajacial (which I agree with one author who said that it should actually be called a vulvacial since the treatment focuses on the outer part of the vagina). The back is because, even though I adore my African Net Sponges, since I can’t actually see all of my back, I like having an esthetician thoroughly tend to it. And my vajacials — well, not only does it pamper my vulvar skin that is waxed, it can also soften my pubic hair and remove/prevent any ingrown hairs and hyperpigmentation that may be going on in that space.
That said, if you want to treat your vulvar skin yourself, use some exfoliating gloves to exfoliate that area and then apply some conditioner to your pubic hair in order to soften it up a bit. As far as the gloves go, apply gentle pressure and rub in circular motions. Also, if you recently had a wax appointment, wait 48 hours before exfoliating, so that you don’t irritate that part of your body. Conditioner-wise, a regular conditioner is fine; just make sure to avoid having it get inside of your labia or into your vagina as much as possible, so that the ingredients of the conditioner don't irritate it.
9. Apparently, a Hot Trend Is Full Bushes in Bikinis Right Now
It’s your hair, so do with it what you will. That said, though, I must admit that I did “pause and ponder” when I recently read that a pubic hair trend right now is rocking full bushes while in a bikini. Honestly, that leaves me with so many questions that I’m just gonna say that if you’re — pardon the pun — big on trends, that’s what’s hot with pubes, so…go with God on this one. LOL.
10. Pubic Hair Thins with Age
A hormone that’s produced at an accelerated rate during puberty is something that is known as androgens. Although males produce them more, we have them as well, and a part of what they do is help our bodies to produce pubic hair. Anyway, as we age (especially once we’re post-menopause), our bodies tend to produce fewer androgens, which can result in thinning pubic hair and even pubic hair loss. After menopause, this will start to become more obvious.
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If you already knew about all of this, I’m impressed. Do me a solid and spread the word to others.
Something that never ceases to amaze me about the human body is that all of its parts serve super relevant and necessary purposes.
As you can see, pubic hair is not exempt. Not at all.
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So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.
In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.
In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.
And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.
We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.
So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.
That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.
This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
It’s not like it has to be a bad thing. In fact, studies say that somewhere around 15 percent of engaged couples actually met through a friend. All I’m saying is, before you entertain someone’s “I’ve got someone I want you to meet” invitation, it would benefit you to interview them first — for the sake of all parties involved.
The questions that I recommend asking? The following six are what I think can get everyone on the same page, so that there is more pleasure than regret from the hook-up attempt.
1. Why Are They So Invested?
GiphyTwo things that I recently watched over again are the series Survivor’s Remorse (the writing is so damn good) and a movie called Trapped in Temptation (both are currently on Tubi). Something that both of them made me think about is the fact that motive reveals a lot when it comes to why people say and do the things that they do.
When it comes to the movie, specifically, without giving the film away — let me just say that, if you are in a relationship, be really careful about listening to individuals who try to talk you out of maintaining it. More times than not, the motive is shady as hell. And honestly, sometimes people who are close to obsessed with you being in one deserve a bit of side-eye too.
Now, if it’s someone who loves all things love, they are in love and they want you to experience something similar — that’s sweet. Just make sure that they are approaching the set up from a healthy space. What I mean by that is they don’t see singleness as some sort of relational handicap or they aren’t trying to override what you want for your life as if they somehow know better (there are so many ways to be a control freak, y’all).
Hmph. Now that I think about it — make sure that the set-up crew isn’t trying to use you to “save” some male friend or relative of theirs. I say that because I once knew a mother whose son had — count ‘em — 10 kids and she was FOREVER trying to get me to date him. Girl, that wasn’t for me. She was looking for a Holy Ghost Jr. for that child of hers. I’ll pass. HARD PASS.
Bottom line with this one — if someone wants to set you up with someone else, the first thing to ask is why? Make sure to really listen to what their answer is. Then pay attention to if your mind, body and spirit are at peace with their answer(s).
2. Do They Know What You Want?
GiphyI don’t know about y’all, but the people (and let’s be honest, by far, it’s usually women) who have tried to set me up with someone? They didn’t even know what my preferences or type was. Hell, they didn’t even know my thoughts or timeline as it relates to being in a serious relationship were either. And what that boils down to is they were trying to hook me up based on their agenda, not mine — and that usually meant that the guys who they came up with? Yeah…I was good on them. LOL.
Yeah, if someone wants to hook you up, you definitely should ask them if they know what you are looking for in a guy when it comes to his looks, personality, passions, spirituality, relational desires and goals, location, etc. Because, indeed, what is the point in going out with someone who is fine as hell and yet, you want kids and he doesn’t (or vice versa) or who has a great personality yet he isn’t even in the same ballpark of your spiritual beliefs?
If your friend really wants to help you out, valuing your time should come with that — and that means bringing someone into your life who complements your lifestyle. No wiggle room here.
3. Are They Aware of Your Deal-Breakers?
GiphyLast year, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, “Should Bad Sex Actually Be A Relationship Deal-Breaker?” The thing that I think needs to go on record about deal-breakers is they aren’t exactly standards that you have. No, a deal-breaker is something that can’t be worked out even after trying to negotiate or compromise. When it comes to relationships, a deal-breaker might be how long two people should date before becoming exclusive or getting engaged. Another deal-breaker might be if being religious is more important than being spiritual and how that manifests itself (church or no church, etc.). And yes, another deal-breaker may be what each other’s sexual needs and expectations are.
When someone is setting you up, it is imperative that they know about your standards. For instance, for me, I am not interested in dating a divorced person, pretty much ever (I Corinthians 7:10-11). I’ve had friends who have tried to hook me up with that demographic before and it has always been a moot effort. The fact that some of them have gotten frustrated with my convictions has absolutely nothing to do with me. Some have tried to get me to compromise my deal-breakers too — like a long-distance relationship. Is it a firm “naw”? No. However, it’s not really something that I am interested in, so why not just…recommend someone local?
Yeah, if someone thinks that they know you well enough to hook you up, they absolutely should be well-versed in what your deal-breakers are before they do. And if they’ve never asked, all they are doing is assuming — and we know what that typically means. LOL.
4. What Is Their Track Record?
GiphyIt’s kind of wild that we now live in a time when more couples meet online than they do through “old-fashioned ways” like via their friends (although some reports say that Gen Z is getting back to that) — and yet, here we are. Still, if you are willing to let someone play pseudo matchmaker in your life, you are well within your rights to inquire about their track record in that department. Have they hooked others up, successfully, before? Has any of their “Cupid work” caused both people to get exactly what they wanted out of the situation? If/when things went awry, why was that?
I know someone who is constantly trying to hook people up. Thing is, maybe 10-15 percent (no joke) of their efforts have proven to be positive and fruitful — and we’re talking about close to close to two decades of them doing it. Listen, time is too precious to be out here doing stuff ONLY to please other people. That said, if someone wants you to devote some time to one of their grand ideas, you are well within your rights to ask about their past and current success score when it comes to it.
5. Can They Keep Their Own Feelings Out of It?
GiphyWanna know if someone who is offering to do something for you is actually doing it more for themselves? If they try to make it be about them when things don’t go the way they would like, that is a dead ringer. An example? They post a message about you on social media and then question you about why you didn’t do the same thing in return. Another example? They do something for you and then throw it in your face during an argument. Still another example? They set you up with someone, it doesn’t work out, and suddenly you’ve put them in a weird spot. No dear — you put your own self in that position by trying to hook two people up in the first place.
I promise you, it will spare everyone unnecessary energy spent (or even drama experienced) if, before you agree to be hooked up, you get the matchmaker on record stating that they will keep their emotions out of it as much as possible. MEANING — they will do the introductions and then let the chips fall where they may. If they can’t do this, my two cents (save it or spend it) would be to decline the offer. Because all you need is someone texting you about why you haven’t called their cousin back or having an attitude with you when you break up with some guy at their church who they thought was the perfect catch (P.S. These aren’t hypothetical examples — LOL).
6. Will They Respect Your Boundaries? Start to Finish?
GiphyYeah, this final one is a biggie. Just because someone sets you up with another person, that doesn’t automatically or necessarily mean that they should have the right to the details of the dynamic. I don’t care if it’s the first date or the 10th date. I don’t care if you decide to just be sex buddies or to have a full-blown relationship. I don’t care if you stay together or break-up — it’s your relationship which makes it your business. Whatever you share is privileged data.
Yeah, I would say that probably the most challenging thing about being hooked up by someone you know is they have a tendency to think that they are a part of the relationship too — and that is a lie. If things go well beyond a couple of dates, you and the guy should discuss what you will both share with the person who introduced you and then agree to stick to that boundary, no matter what. It’s a great way to protect the dynamic, to keep “outside voices” from influencing the growth and to navigate how you want to move, moving forward.
Someone who hooked you up for the right reasons and knows how to honor limits? They will understand. Will they ask questions? Absolutely. Will they pry? Nah.
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Should you sit and let someone hook you up? I mean, you never know how your blessing will come. Just make sure that they are prepared for you to do some digging into their mindset before they start sweetly meddling into your love life.
It’s only fair. Hell, and right. LOL.
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