

I recently read that around 118 million Americans plan on going on summer vacation. For a billion different reasons, that’s good to know because vacations help to reduce stress, improve one’s quality of sleep, give folks the opportunity to spend quality time with loved ones, put people in better moods, and, ultimately, make them more protective and happier once they return home as well.
If you happen to be one of the millions who have at least one vacation planned over the next several weeks, as you’re putting your list together of all of the things that you need to do and get— question: have you thought about a plan for your vagina and vulva (the outer part of your vagina)?
No? Yeah, that’s not good becauseit’s actually more common for women to experience yeast infections and UTIs when it’s super hot outside. That’s the bad news. The good news is there are things that you can do to “prep” your vagina/vulva, on a few different levels, before you leave for your trip. That way, “she” can end up having just as much fun as you plan to the entire time you are gone.
Behold, 10 hella effective tips.
1. A Wax
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Personally, I’ve been getting waxed for several years now, and for the most part, I have no regrets. I only say “for the most part” because I won’t lie — sometimes the temperature of the wax can alter the tackiness of it, which can make the hair-pulling process a bit uncomfortable (applying some oil to your skin before heading off to your wax appointment is a great hack for that). Still, when you consider the fact that waxing not only removes unwanted body hair for longer periods of time than shaving, it also exfoliates and softens the skin around the inner part of your vulva (which is the outer part of your vagina), reduces ingrown hairs, helps to prevent body odor (because the less hair you have, the less sweat and bacteria that can get trapped around that part of your body) and that it keeps your bikini line looking pretty amazing (check out “Yes, There Are Things That You Can Do To Get A Smooth Bikini Line”) — it absolutely makes all of the sense in the world to get waxed before going on a vacation.
2. A Menstrual Cup
Listen, sometimes periods don’t want to cooperate with your vacation schedule — and yes, that sucks times a billion. Just in case your cycle is a bit unpredictable (for instance, if you know that you’re on the later side of perimenopause — check out “Perimenopause Has Your Period Being All Over The Place? Here's What To Do.”), make sure to have a menstrual cup in tow. It’s less bulky than a pad and tends to be more comfortable than a tampon.
Plus, thanks to the silicone that most of them are made from and how well they fit inside of your vagina, you can swim, do cartwheels on the beach, wear the sexiest dress, and damn near forget that you even have one inside of you (by the way, if you want to have sex that’s as messy-less as possible, some women do this with the help of amenstrual disc).
3. (Maybe) a Prescription
Technology has caused virtually (no pun intended) everything to change with the times; including how people do prescriptions. These days, there are companies like Wisp and Nurx that let you get certain prescriptions from their online medical team. As far as your vaginal health goes, this can be super helpful if you’ve got a recurring yeast infection and you don’t have time to make a doctor’s appointment or if you want to do something like delay your cycle for a few days.
When it comes to the latter point, in walks a drug known as Norethindrone Acetate; it’s basically a progestin-only pill that can either stop your period altogether or significantly slow down your blood flow if you’d prefer to be as period-free as possible.
Now, it is a drug and drugs can potentially come with side effects. So, it’s wise to run your thought process by your own healthcare professional and you definitely need to be totally honest while the online team is doing their initial assessment. I’m just putting the option out there…so that you know you have it.
4. A Probiotic
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Something that your vagina contains is good bacteria and bad bacteria. When the bad happens to outweigh the good, that’s how irritation and infections start. One way to get a lead on this transpiring is toget some probiotics into your system. If you’ve never shopped for probiotics (especially for your vagina) before, reportedly, the strains that you should look for (most) are Lactobacillus crispatus and Lactobacillus rhamnosus; that’s because they are high-effective at giving your vagina the good bacteria that it needs.For the record, foods that are also high in probiotics include fermented ones like yogurt and kombucha along with green peas, apples, bananas, asparagus, and garlic.
5. A Mesh Laundry Bag
Iffecal matter can get stuck in your own washing machine (and it does, which is why you should give it a good bleach or white vinegar rinseon a monthly basis), imagine what it’s like at a hotel, resort, or laundry mat (lawd!). So, if you’re needing to wash some of your stuff while you’re away and, when it comes to your panties and bathing suit(s) specifically, you don’t want to wash them by hand, at least put them into a mesh laundry bag. Not only does the bag help to protect your delicates from the damage that a washing machine could cause them, but it also can help to reduce the amount of bacteria that could cling onto them — even after you consider your clothes to be clean.
6. A Moisture-Wicking Bathing Suit
Here’s something that you may not know: If you’re planning onswimming in saltwater or chlorinated water, it’s best that you wash your bathing suit after every use; that way, sweat, and bacteria won’t get locked into the fabric and end up irritating your vulva/vagina. Another swimsuit tip? Get one that is moisture-wicking. That way, any moisture in your swimsuit will dry faster, which can ultimately help prevent a nasty yeast infection from occurring. Just go to your favorite store or site and request moisture-wicking suits or put “moisture-wicking” in the search field.
7. A Cover-Up
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Listen, even though a lot of our people don’t tend to be as intentional about tanning as other (eh hem) demographics, let’s not act like we don’t like taking in some rays.
And when you find yourself lying on your stomach and basking in the sun by the beach, whether you realize it or not, there’s a term for that: it’s called “perineum sunning” — and just like the rest of your body can experience damaging UV rays, so can your va-jay-jay (and the area that’s in between your anus and your vaginal opening which is your perineum), if you’re not careful.
However, unlike the rest of your body, being able to use sunscreen to shield it from the sun because your vagina, vulva, and perineum are far more fragile; help them out by putting on a cover-up if you plan on being out in the heat for more than 30 minutes at a time. Cover-ups are a really cute way to reduce heat exposure, as it protects your perineum in the most subtle way possible.
8. A Proactive UTI Plan
Did you know thatas temperatures increase, you up your chances of experiencing a UTI (urinary tract infection)? A big part of the reason is that the less hydrated you are, the easier it is for bacteria to post up somewhere inyour urinary system. One way to stay on top of this is to, of course, drink lots of water. Also, urinate regularly (especially before and after sex), and yes,take cranberry supplements or drink pure cranberry juice (not the cocktail stuff; that has loads of sugar in it). Studies reveal that the properties in cranberries help to fight off the bacteria that lead to UTIs. So no, it’s not a myth; cranberries are the absolute truth as far as maintaining vaginal health is concerned.
9. A pH Balance Plan Too
Your period can throw offyour vagina’s pH balance. If you recently did a round of antibiotics, they can throw off your vagina’s pH balance.Stress can throw off your vagina’s pH balance.Hormonal fluctuations can throw off your vagina’s pH balance. Know what else can? Sex with a new partner (due to their bodily fluids coming into contact with your body for the first time) can throw off your vagina’s pH balance. And when your pH is not where it should be, it’s a pretty fair bet that your vagina and vulva are not going to be very happy with you. That’s why you should also have a pH balance plan in place.
Some of the things that you should do are againdrink lots of water (to keep your vagina’s ecosystem balanced), meditate (to keep your stress levels down), consume less sugar (yeast thrives in sugar), wear breathable panties (check out “These Are The Kinds Of Panties Your Vagina Actually Prefers”) and use condoms (again, sperm/semen can throw your vagina’s pH off). If you do this before you leave and while you’re on vacation as well, your vagina and vulva should remain chill while you’re trying to enjoy yourself.
10. A Pretty Ass Muumuu
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If sleeping naked is healthy for your vagina when you’re at home (and it is), it also is when you’re on vacation. Honestly, between all of the sweating, swimming, and whatever other moisture that your vulva and vagina are about to encounter, the less time “they” spend trapped up in moisture and fabrics like nylon, spandex, and polyester blends, the better. A remedy? A muumuu. Yep, you heard me. LOL. Get you a semi-sexy one that is made out of organic cotton, so that your body can breathe, it’s not see-through and you can comfortably be naked (underneath) as you’re enjoying drinks on your resort deck or taking a stroll on a cruise ship. You’ll thank me later. Trust me.
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Yep. Follow these tips and I can almost guarantee that your vagina/vulva will treat you right. And since the last thing that I think you want to deal with is pissing her off…now you can focus on other things. Now “she” should be good.
Enjoy your time! “Both” of you. LOL.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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I’ve gotta say that, for the most part, my friends are pretty damn chill. There is one (major) exception, though — and it’s an odd one. Even after all these years and countless times of me giving them the same answer, if there is a time when they think they are my mama, it’s when they see an email come through at an odd hour of the night. Then, all of a sudden, here they come asking me when do I get sleep if I’m emailing at (say) three in the morning.
Again, the answer never changes because, if there is one thing that Shellie Reneé Warren is gonna get, it’s 6-8 (sometimes nine) hours of sleep. However, since my chronotype (check out “Ever Wonder What Personality Traits Make Someone A 'Morning Person'?”) means that I like/prefer to write in the wee hours of the morning, sometimes I will sleep for the night for five hours and take a nap in the day. And y’all, that is just fine with me because I am well aware of the fact that napping does everything from give me more energy, heighten my alertness and even make me more creative to decrease stress levels, strengthen immunity, and reduce my chances of experiencing a heart attack or stroke.
My problem is I will oftentimes go “overboard” with my daytime zzz’s. What I mean by that is, in order to get the most out of a nap, they say thatyou shouldn’t sleep for longer than 25 minutes or so; otherwise, you could wake up feeling sluggish (I don’t but…). Also, it can make resting, soundly, at night a bit of a struggle.
So, what are you saying, Shellie? We should get quickies in? Yeah. And it’s funny that the word “quickie” would come up because just like a sex quickie can do wonders for you (and it can — check out “12 Super Solid Reasons To Have A Quickie Every Single Day”), it’s a full-circle moment when I say that something that can improve the quality of your sex life is to have a power nap (a nap that lasts between 10-30 minutes).
Wanna know how the two things correlate? Honestly, it’s no secret that sleep and sex work together to optimize both (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”). Today, though, we’re going to tap into how a nap, specifically, can have you partaking in some of the best sex that you’ve experienced in a minute. I’ll explain.
Naps Reduce Stress
If you’re feeling super stressed out right now, you are not alone. There is plenty of data out here that says that most of us are stressed for at least a couple of reasons at a time — and that can impact your sexual health on a few levels. For one thing, it can bring about feelings of depression and/or anxiety. Stress can also throw your hormone levels off (including your cycle) which can weaken your libido. Stress can make you want to put distance between you and your partner (yes, literally).
Stress can also make it challenging to get aroused or to have an orgasm. And just what can help to decrease stress? Taking a nap. Since sleep has a way of helping you to “get off of the clock” and relax a bit, that can lower your stress levels and “reset” your body so that you are calmer — and that, in turn, can do wonders for your sex drive and ultimately your sex life.
Naps Improve Your Mood
There is one person in my life, and fairly 80 percent of the time, she’s in a super good mood. Oh, but let that girl go without sleep, and…who is this woman? LOL. There’s research behind why this happens. When a person is sleep-deprived, it messes with their brain chemicals, and that can amplify emotions like anger, restlessness and sadness. In fact, one study revealed that people who had their sleep disrupted throughout the night, they ended up having their positive outlook on life reduced by about 30 percent.
And geeze, who wants to have sex when they’re not feeling very good? Anyway, since serotonin is a neurotransmitter that helps to regulate your moods, your sleep patterns, and your libido and sleep is what helps to keep it in balance — by taking a nap, not only can it help you to feel better, it can also increase your desire for sex (it can also build up your endurance which is also…sexually beneficial).
Naps Increase Your Focus and Concentration
Something that some of my clients bring up is how, when it comes to having sex, sometimes the flesh is willing while the spirit is weak because, although the desire for intimacy is there, so much is going on that they aren’t able to get still enough to focus on experiencing copulation with their partner. This also tracks because, when you don’t have enough rest, your brain finds itself not working in harmony and that can make it hard to do everything from approaching life with a sense of flexibility to making necessary decisions.
Certain data also reveal that a lack of rest can cause you to have a really poor attention span and not process things in context (the more you know). So, if you really want to get some yet it’s hard for you to focus long enough to make it happen, ask your bae to lie down with you and take a nap. Between the sleep and the snuggling (check out “Fall's Coming: 8 Wonderful Health Benefits Of Cuddling”) — you may wake up with your mind and body totally on the same page. #wink
Naps Can Make You Feel Better About Your Body
Even if, overall, you feel really good about your body, I think that we all have moments when we feel less attractive than others — and who wants to have sex when they don’t really feel…very sexy? Well, something else that sleep, in general, can do is increase your confidence in your body.
For one thing, if you want to lose a few pounds, sleep can actually make that happen by helping your body metabolize the glucose (sugar) that’s in it so that you can better manage your appetite. Other studies go on to share that since sleep deprivation can impact one’s mental health and emotional stability in a negative way, of course, getting enough rest would increase body positivity.
Shoot, science even goes so far as to say that insomnia can cause people to have an elevated level of dissatisfaction when it comes to their body image. Don’t take their word for it, though. Look in the mirror before a nap. Then look in a mirror after waking up from me. Do you feel better? I’d be surprised if you don’t.
Makes Your Brain Bigger…Which Could Make Your Orgasms Better
I saved the best for last by design. Now if you’re wondering how in the world a nap can improve (and possibly increase) your orgasms — oh, there is a method to the madness…trust. For starters, the saying that your biggest sex organ is your brain? That isn’t a myth. Long story less long, the brain is what houses your central nervous system and that is what controls how men and women sexually function (yes, literally).
And since the brain also releases feel-good chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin during sex and brain activity significantly increases in women during sexual activity (especially right before she orgasms) — well, would it trip you out to know that when you take a nap, your brain actually expands? A bigger brain (that’s healthy) can potentially intensify your sexual experiences (and your climaxes) — and who doesn’t want that to go down?
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Like I said earlier, I never have to be convinced to get a nap in. However, if your sex life has been a bit stagnant lately, you’ve been feeling a little sluggish and you’re not sure what to do — I’m hoping that a nap can get you right.
There’s enough science to prove that it can. All you need to do is give it a shot.
Now where’s your pillow and sleep mask, chile?
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