Tracee Ellis Ross Breaks Down What ‘Wander, Ponder, And Be’ Means To Her

As Tracee Ellis Ross preps for her 50th birthday on October 29, the black-ish star is reflecting on the many things she’s learned along the way. One of those things is “wander, ponder, be,” which she uses to help her write speeches. During her interview with Hoda & Jenna, the beloved comedic actress gave insight into what those three words actually mean and how she applies them to her life. “I started figuring out the wander, ponder, be’s whenever I was writing a speech. Because in order to write a speech you just sort of have something come in from the inside,” she explained.
If it’s one thing that the Golden Globe winner is known for outside of acting, it’s her gift of gab. From her hilarious skits on social media to her energetic conversations in interviews, Tracee has always known how to use her voice and it also shines through in her speeches. Her speech during the 2017 Glamour's Women of the Year Summit went viral after she spoke against women’s accomplishments being diminished due to them not being married and/ or starting a family. It appears we have Tracee’s 'wander, ponder, and be' strategy to thank for that.
“I really needed time to wander, ponder, be and social media does not allow it,” she continued. “Because you take all your downtime so I like to give myself a chance to wander, to not know where I’m going but just wander, have time to just ponder, and just kinda play in the imagination of my mind and to be.”
She added, “And my favorite part of my life is my life like making food, and like going to the market and being in my life.”
While she isn’t shy about using her voice to speak on matters of the world, there is one thing she struggled to use her voice for—singing. Tracee shared that she always wanted to sing but was “too terrified” to follow in her mother, the great Diana Ross’, footsteps. She finally faced that fear after starring in the film The High Note where she plays a singer. But she recently realized that not using her gift of singing was only holding her back from creating new experiences in her life.
“What was interesting was as I was learning how to sing…I felt like I opened lifeways, not pathways but lifeways,” she said. “Not that I was necessarily meant to be a singer, but by cutting off that part of myself just because I was afraid, I had closed off certain doors to part of my identity and myself, and so things just started to open up when I found my voice.”
In need of a little motivation? Keep reading for 9 more noteworthy gems about life that Tracee has dropped over the years.
Tracee Ellis Ross on the Advice That’s Guided Her Through Life:
"There are two things that have been the biggest guides through my life. The first one is: Follow your heart and trust your instincts. The second is: What other people think is none of your business and even sometimes what you think of yourself is none of your business. Sometimes it’s about staying in action as opposed to trying to decide how to make people think a certain way about you." - via WSJ
On Lessons She Has Learned as an Entrepreneur:
"One is to trust my instincts. Two is, there’s so much more involved than I ever had any idea of—and I knew there was a lot involved. The biggest lessons have been around the consistency of relationships and communication with retail partners and also my team…. Because it is an hourly thing, particularly right now during the supply-chain issues that are going on. And then the last thing is, you don’t need a degree in CEO-dom or entrepreneurship in order to run a successful company. You need to surround yourself with very informed and excellent people and remain teachable without losing focus on your vision." - via WSJ
On Finding Meaning in Life:
"I feel that to a certain extent, we are the first generation of choice for women, who have had the opportunity to actually choose the lives they want to live…. The cultural expectation for women that they are meant to be mothers and married and that that is almost what makes their lives valid creates a scenario that I push up against in general. There's many places where that happens in our culture that I think are very limiting for women in terms of finding meaning in their own lives." - via Good Housekeeping
On Showing Her Full Self on Social Media:
“One of the reasons that I share so much on social media is that I recently turned 49. At this age, self-care, self-love, joy and drinking plenty of water are what keep your body strong. I love posting about this because it gives you the full picture of who I am. I’m not always the perfect Tracee on the red carpet. That’s not how I wake up. Various other things are needed for that.” via Elle Canada

Rich Fury/VF22/Getty Images for Vanity Fair
On Living Life on Her Own Terms:
"I didn’t see enough examples of different versions of how a woman can find happiness and joy and power and sensuality, sexuality, all of that, without it being through the lens of how I’m seen by a man. People are like, 'You’re the poster child for being single.' And I was like, 'Great.' But what I would prefer is that I’m the poster child for living my life on my terms. And that there’s a version of that for everyone.
"I don’t live my life for other people. I just totally live it for me. This is something that has really solidified itself into an unbreakable, unshakable foundation in the last four or five years." via Harper's Bazaar
On the Power of Her Womanhood:
"There's a power I started to feel when I began to call myself a woman that I wasn't tapped into as a younger girl. I've witnessed it in friends of mine and in people I don't know. It's the power that generates from this idea that our bodies can create life—even though not every woman creates life. It's a woman's ability to look at life a certain way, to create in a certain way, to be of service in a certain way, to care in a certain way." - via Glamour
On Detaching Herself From the Opinions of Others:
"What other people think about me is none of my business. Sometimes even what I think about myself is not my business. Opinions are like assholes: We’ve all got them. What I know is that I wake up every day trying to do my best. I know that my heart and my intention is in the right place. And if somebody points something out to me that I actually think is constructive and loving and I agree and I need to take accountability for it, I can do that. My selfhood and my sense of self can withstand appropriate criticism." via The Cut
On Finding Support in Dark Moments:
"The key is you ask yourself, What do I need right now? I’ve cultivated a relationship with myself where I know I have choices…. I have a toolbox of ways I can find support; journaling is helpful, or meditation. And I have had to really make friends with loneliness. And know the difference between choice-ful solitude and lonely. [I find comfort in] being able to name it, to say I’m feeling lonely, then to have a tribe of people I feel safe enough with to share: This is how I feel.
"I don’t have the luxury of not going to work when I don’t feel up to it. Most people don’t. On those days, I acknowledge I am feeling f-cking crappy, and I’m not at my best, and I still want to or need to keep walking forward. I have to do some of my best work on my worst days. I have to look pretty even when I don’t feel pretty. There’s a way to hold both things." - via Glamour
On How She Owns Her Own Narrative:
"By not letting other people’s ideas of me change my idea of myself. It means holding my own counsel and navigating my life on my compass, which is about my relationship with higher power, my relationship with those I trust and love." via The Cut
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Because We Are Still IT, Girl: It Girl 100 Returns
Last year, when our xoNecole team dropped our inaugural It Girl 100 honoree list, the world felt, ahem, a bit brighter.
It was March 2024, and we still had a Black woman as the Vice President of the United States. DEI rollbacks weren’t being tossed around like confetti. And more than 300,000 Black women were still gainfully employed in the workforce.
Though that was just nineteen months ago, things were different. Perhaps the world then felt more receptive to our light as Black women.
At the time, we launched It Girl 100 to spotlight the huge motion we were making as dope, GenZennial Black women leaving our mark on culture. The girls were on the rise, flourishing, drinking their water, minding their business, leading companies, and learning to do it all softly, in rest. We wanted to celebrate that momentum—because we love that for us.
So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.

In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.

In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.

And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.

We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.

So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.

That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.

This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
The It Girl 100 Class Of 2025: Meet The Culture & Entertainment Shapeshifters You Need To Know
Culture shifts when she moves, and this year’s It Girls have the whole world collectively hitting refresh.
You see, the Culture & Entertainment It Girls don’t just become the moment, they shape it. Whether she’s redefining Young Hollywood, bending genres across the board, or turning a casual drop into cultural canon, her presence transcends timeline, group chats, and red carpets alike. This It Girl is the kind of woman whose name travels, from screens to stages to every corner of the zeitgeist.
This year's It Girl 100 is a mosaic of brilliance, spotlighting media personalities, cultural disruptors, beauty visionaries, and boundary-pushing prodigies who embody the spirit of "Yes, And." This digital celebration honors the women who embrace every facet of themselves, proving you can be a light and still honor your desire to glow at your own pace.
The women repping for the Culture & Entertainment category prove relevance is crafted, not accidental. It's the alchemy of talent, intention, and magnetism that becomes the spark.
Here's the roll call for xoNecole's It Girl 100 Class of 2025: Culture & Entertainment.

Model and Media Personality Olandria Carthen
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Olandria Carthen
Her Handle: @x_olandria
Her Title: Model and Media Personality
Who's That It Girl: Olandria Carthen is lighting up the entertainment space with creativity and confidence. We love her for carving out a name rooted in self-belief and for using her artistry to uplift and inspire.

Actress Akira Akbar
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Akira Akbar
Her Handle: @akira_akbar
Her Title: Actress
Who's That It Girl: Bright, fearless, and full of heart, Akira Akbar is redefining what young Hollywood looks like. We honor her for bringing depth and authenticity to every role and for reminding the world that talent has no age limit.

Singer, Songwriter and Actress Halle Bailey
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Halle Bailey
Her Handle: @hallebailey
Her Title: Singer, Songwriter and Actress
Who's That It Girl: Halle Bailey is ethereal strength in motion. We love her for redefining princesshood, representation, and the power of visibility, inspiring young dreamers to believe their voices belong on every stage.

Entrepreneur, Model, Actress, and Cultural Voice Chelley Bissanthe
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Chelley Bissanthe
Her Handle: @_slimthin
Her Title: Entrepreneur, Model, Actress, and Cultural Voice
Who's That It Girl: Chelley Bissainthe is a Haitian-American model, entrepreneur, and advocate. She uses her platform to uplift communities, honor her Caribbean heritage, and build pathways to ownership and legacy.

Actress and Singer Ryan Destiny
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Ryan Destiny
Her Handle: @ryandestiny
Her Title: Actress and Singer
Who's That It Girl: Ryan Destiny embodies star power and stillness in one. We celebrate her for her poise, range, and unshakable confidence, proof that quiet strength can shine just as bright as any spotlight.

Reality TV Personality and Influencer Amber Desiree (AD)
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Amber Desiree (AD)
Her Handle: @amberdesiree
Her Title: Reality TV Personality and Influencer
Who's That It Girl: Charismatic and bold, Amber Desiree brings emotional depth and vibrant storytelling to every project she touches. We love her for representing multifaceted womanhood on screen and off, inspiring a generation of creatives to lead with authenticity.

Top Creator, Model, Media Personality and Cultural Tastemaker Serena Page
Credit: Jacob Webster
Serena Page
Her Handle: @serenaapagee
Her Title: Top Creator, Model, Media Personality and Cultural Tastemaker
Who's That It Girl: Serena Page first captured hearts on Love Island USA Season 6 and has since become one of pop culture’s favorite “it girls.” Her confidence and authenticity have made her a go-to face for brands like SheaMoisture, Pepsi, and CeraVe.

Director and Executive Producer Courtney Whitaker
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Courtney Whitaker
Her Handle: @courtneyewhitaker
Her Title: Director and Executive Producer
Who's That It Girl: Courtney Whitaker is a two-time Emmy-winning producer and director specializing in TV, documentaries, and branded content. With over 20 projects completed, she's dedicated to amplifying underrepresented voices through impactful storytelling.

DJ Uncle Waffles
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Uncle Waffles
Her Handle: @unclewaffles_
Her Who's That It Girl: The DJ queen of the global stage, Uncle Waffles turns sound into celebration. We love her for electrifying dance floors and championing African creativity with confidence, rhythm, and undeniable joy.

Entrepreneur and Television Personality JaNa Craig
Credit: Susan Madore
JaNa Craig
Her Handle: @janacraig_
Her Title: Creator, Entrepreneur and Television Personality
Who's That It Girl: With creativity that defies convention, JaNa Craig is building a lane all her own in music and production. We celebrate her for reminding women that reinvention is power and authenticity is art.

Award-Winning Journalist, Host and Creator Gia Peppers
Credit: Jonavennci Divad - Ravenn Burs
Gia Peppers
Her Handle: @giapeppers
Her Title: Award-Winning Journalist, Host and Creator of Healed Girl Era Podcast
Who's That It Girl: Gia Peppers is an award-winning journalist, host, and podcaster who uses her platforms to tell powerful stories. Through More Than That and Healed Girl Era, she reminds audiences to embrace their voice and value.

Actress, Executive Producer, and Founder Marsai Martin
Credit: Maya McHenry
Marsai Martin
Her Handle: @marsaimartin
Her Title: Actress, Executive Producer, and Founder of Genius Entertainment and Sai Summer Cookout
Who's That It Girl: Marsai Martin is a creative prodigy with executive energy. We’re inspired by her for producing, directing, and acting with intention, showing young Black girls that leadership starts wherever you decide it does.

Rapper and Singer Doechii
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Doechii
Her Handle: @doechii
Her Title: Rapper and Singer
Who's That It Girl: A lyrical firestorm and unapologetic visionary, Doechii is shaping the sound of this generation. We honor her for pushing the boundaries of genre, performance, and self-expression with fearless creativity.

Actress, Singer, Producer and TV Host Keke Palmer
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Keke Palmer
Her Handle: @keke
Her Title: Actress, Singer, Producer and TV Host
Who's That It Girl: An icon of charisma and confidence, Keke Palmer is entertainment royalty. We celebrate her for leading with humor, honesty, and hustle, showing that versatility is her superpower and evolution her legacy.

Actress, Model, Singer, Designer, Content Creator and Entrepreneur Nzinga Imani
Credit: Shae DeWaal
Nzinga Imani
Her Handle: @nzingaimani
Her Title: Actress, Model, Singer, Designer, Content Creator and Entrepreneur
Who's That It Girl: We love Nzinga Imani for her bold authenticity and on-screen presence. As an actress, model, and entrepreneur, she’s redefining beauty and representation in entertainment.

Rapper and Singer Monaleo
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Monaleo
Her Handle: @themonaleo
Her Title: Rapper and Singer
Who's That It Girl: Monaleo’s voice hits with power and purpose. We honor her for pairing confidence with vulnerability, turning her truth into anthems that inspire women to heal loudly and live boldly.

Singer and Songwriter Amaarae
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Amaarae
Her Handle: @amaarae
Her Title: Singer and Songwriter
Who's That It Girl: With a sound that bends genres and a style that breaks rules, Amaarae is one of music’s most daring voices. We celebrate her for pushing boundaries, owning her individuality, and amplifying the power of Afro-fusion on a global stage.

Singer, KATSEYE Monan Bannerman
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Monan Bannerman
Her Handle: @meretmanon
Her Title: Singer, KATSEYE
Who's That It Girl: As a member of KATSEYE, Monan merges style, grace, and global influence. We celebrate her for bringing cultural depth and individuality to the next generation of pop icons.

Singer, Actress, Creative Director, and Choreographer Teyana Taylor
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Teyana Taylor
Her Handle: @teyanataylor
Her Title: Singer, Actress, Creative Director, and Choreographer
Who's That It Girl: Teyana Taylor is the embodiment of artistry, singer, choreographer, director, designer. We honor her for transforming every creative avenue she touches into a masterpiece of movement, emotion, and empowerment.

Singer, Songwriter and Producer Laila!
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Laila!
Her Handle: @prodlaila
Her Title: Singer, Songwriter, and Producer
Who's That It Girl: Laila is the creative force whose sound pulses with honesty and energy. We honor her for capturing emotion through production and storytelling, inspiring a new era of music that feels intimate yet universal.

Actress Antonia Gentry
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Antonia Gentry
Her Handle: @_antoniagentry_
Her Title: Actress
Who's That It Girl: With talent that transcends screens, Antonia Gentry brings raw emotion and grace to every performance. We honor her for reminding us that vulnerability is strength and that storytelling can be both healing and revolutionary.

Actress and Model Laura Harrier
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Laura Harrier
Her Handle: @lauraharrier
Her Title: Actress and Model
Who's That It Girl: Effortlessly chic and profoundly grounded, Laura Harrier is redefining Hollywood grace. We celebrate her for using her platform to champion representation and for proving that elegance and activism can coexist beautifully.

R&B Singer/Songwriter, Actress Coco Jones
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Coco Jones
Her Handle: @cocojones
Her Title: R&B Singer/Songwriter, Actress
Who's That It Girl: Coco Jones is a Grammy-winning R&B breakout who captivates with her timeless artistry and soulful voice. She also stars as Hilary Banks in the Bel-Air reboot and recently wrapped an upcoming romantic comedy That’s Her.

Entrepreneur, Media Personality and Philanthropist Lauren Speed-Hamilton
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Lauren Speed-Hamilton
Her Handle: @need4lspeed
Her Title: Entrepreneur, Media Personality and Philanthropist
Who's That It Girl: Lauren Speed-Hamilton turned her Love Is Blind journey into a masterclass in purpose-driven storytelling. We love her for inspiring authenticity in love, media, and entrepreneurship, building connection where vulnerability meets vision.

Actress and Singer Amber Riley
Credit: xoNecole
Amber Riley
Her Handle: @msamberpriley
Her Title: Actress and Singer
Who's That It Girl: Amber Riley’s voice is pure power, soulful, spiritual, and unforgettable. We celebrate her for using her artistry to uplift others, redefining what resilience and radiance look like in entertainment.
Joy Woods
Her Handle: @joynwoods
Her Title: Actress
Who's That It Girl: Joy Woods’ name says it all, joy radiates through every note she sings. We’re inspired by her Broadway brilliance and her commitment to showing that Black women’s voices are boundless and breathtaking.

Country Singer, Songwriter Tanner Adell
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Tanner Adell
Her Handle: @tanneradell
Her Title: Country Singer, Songwriter
Who's That It Girl: With a voice as bold as her vision, Tanner Adell is redefining country music with style and soul. We celebrate her for breaking barriers, blending cultures, and creating a sound that’s unapologetically her own.

Producer, Host and Media Maven Kéla Walker
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Kéla Walker
Her Handle: @KelaWalker
Her Title: Producer, Host and Media Maven
Who's That It Girl: Kéla Walker is a 7x Emmy-nominated producer, host, and digital tastemaker, a modern-day media maven merging television storytelling with contemporary influence. As the founder of Walker Media Group, she curates aspirational lifestyle content anchored in style, culture, and substance. From red carpets to real life, Kéla brings a distinct point of view that bridges legacy media and the digital landscape.

TV Personality Riley Burruss
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Riley Burruss
Her Handle: @rileyburruss
Her Title: TV Personality
Who's That It Girl: We celebrate Riley Burruss as a rising creative and storyteller forging her own space in entertainment. Fresh out of NYU with a degree in music business, she’s building momentum through Next Gen NYC and her podcast The Burruss Banter, all while exploring a future in entertainment law.

Entrepreneur, Actor, Model, Style Icon and Entrepreneur Lori Harvey
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Lori Harvey
Her Handle: @loriharvey
Her Title: Beauty Entrepreneur, Actor, Model, Style Icon and Entrepreneur
Who's That It Girl: Lori Harvey embodies modern femininity and independence. We celebrate her for turning self-love into legacy and for inspiring women to walk confidently in their own power.

Actress Storm Reid
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Storm Reid
Her Handle: @stormreid
Her Title: Actress
Who's That It Girl: Storm Reid radiates brilliance far beyond her years. We love her for bringing compassion, creativity, and courage to every role, a true beacon for young women dreaming of changing the world through art.

Actress Whitney Peak
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Whitney Peak
Her Handle: @whitneypeak
Her Title: Actress
Who's That It Girl: Whitney Peak exudes quiet confidence and magnetic charm. We celebrate her for redefining modern cool and for reminding young women that authenticity is the most timeless form of beauty.
Tap into the full It Girl 100 Class of 2025 and meet all the women shaping the culture this year and beyond. See the full list here.
Featured image by xoStaff









