Not many people can say they grew up with a mom who doubled as their very own dermatologist. That is unless you’re Davlyn Mosley, founder of the skincare brand Namesake, who grew up with clinical and motherly advice, right within the comfort of her home.
Davlyn was introduced to the world of skincare and dermatology — quite literally — from the womb. Her mother, Namesake advisor, and board-certified dermatologist, Dr. Lynn McKinley-Grant was pregnant with Davlyn during her residency at New York University. As Davlyn grew older, she continued to visit her mother’s lab and developed an interest in the space
Davlyn Mosley
Photos courtesy of Davlyn Mosley
“I spent my youth going with my mom to conferences, working in her practice, and along the way learning the ins and outs of skincare,” Davlyn tells xoNecole. “I was always fascinated by new, innovative products and treatments that would come into her office.”
While the early exposure was initially out of the necessity that comes with balancing motherhood and a full-time career, Dr. McKinley-Grant shares how the influence it left on her daughter was enduring. “Now I know that exposing her to [dermatology] was a great thing. These were experiences that I didn't even know would impact her but now I do,” she says. “[By] creating a skincare product that requires lab work, a good work ethic, and a passion for her work.”
While Davlyn’s career path wasn’t linear, the experience she picked up through marketing and storytelling later served her in a tangible way. “I spent 15 years working specifically at ad agencies and most recently Google, where I was before I launched Namesake,” she shares. “All these years were the building blocks of what I am doing now… and when I look back it, all makes sense.”
Davlyn’s leap of faith landed her in the driver’s seat as a beauty founder with products that prioritize the concerns of women with melanated skin and pay homage to her earliest and most cherished muse. “My mom is the inspiration behind Namesake,” Davlyn says. “In building Namesake, I wanted to pass down all of the knowledge that I’ve learned from my mom and develop products that use some of our favorite ingredients that are amazing for melanin-rich skin.”
Today, Davlyn continues to pass down her mother-daughter skincare do’s and don’ts through viral TikToks. With advice ranging from putting sunscreen on your ears, not eating citrus in the sun, or rubbing your eyes too hard (or at all), Davlyn and her mother Dr. McKinley-Grant are now imparting their expertise to xoNecole.
Dr. Lynn McKinely-Grant
Photo courtesy of Dr. Lynn McKinely-Grant
On Dr. McKinley-Grant’s earliest memories of skincare, from one generation to another:
“My introduction to skincare was very early on from my mother and my grandmother. Back then the two main products for the skin were POND'S Cold Cream and Vaseline,” Dr. McKinley-Grant recalls. “All of the aunties used these their whole lives. We would cleanse our faces with water—we didn’t use a lot of soap on our faces. We didn’t use sunscreen but we were always under umbrellas at the beach protecting ourselves from the sun. I remember as a kid, Vaseline seemed to keep my face warmer in the winter, and after my acne resolved in my teenage years, it seemed to be great to use at night.”
On the formulation behind Namesake’s hero product, the Daily Moisturizer:
“I wanted to create the perfect moisturizer, the one that I had always been searching for. Something that was not only luxurious and hydrating but also brightens and smoothes your skin without irritation, Davlyn explains. “I was constantly cross-checking our ingredient list with the National Eczema Society’s List of Ingredients to Avoid, Sephora and Credo’s Clean standards, and, of course, calling my mom about any new ingredient our lab would suggest. The whole process took two years, which also included extensive irritation testing in a 3rd party lab.
Dr. McKinley-Grant adds, “When creating products for skin of color, it’s really important to use non-irritating and non-comedogenic ingredients. Any inflammation caused by a product can result in hyperpigmentation so we had to be very thoughtful about the formulation. Davlyn’s skin has always been sensitive to certain ingredients so I was able to advise her on ingredients to avoid that I have seen patients react negatively to.”
How Davlyn’s challenges with her “sensitive and reactive” skin became a motivating factor in the creation of Namesake:
“I’ve gone through so many phases when it comes to skincare. My skin has always been sensitive but I always wanted to try the latest and greatest products,” she shares. “As I got older I wanted to use products that were effective for the bright, glowy look that so many of us want but became frustrated when they broke me out or irritated my skin. This was a huge motivator in creating Namesake: finding this balance of effective, clinically-tested ingredients in a non-irritating formulation created with my skin tone in mind.”
Of the many viral do’s/don’ts her mom has imparted, Davlyn shares the one piece of advice you should pay attention to the most:
“I would say rubbing your eyes too hard, which is, I admit, a hard thing not to do,” Davlyn shares. “It’s something my mom used to tell me to stop doing, and still would if she caught me doing it today! Darkness around the eyes is a top concern for women of color, so it's really important to treat the delicate skin around your eyes as gently as you can. If you find that you’re rubbing your eyes frequently, over time that may contribute to some of the darkness and loss of elasticity that we're experiencing.”
She continues, “My mom always told me that it’s important to figure out why your eyes are so itchy. Are they dry? Are you sensitive to the mascara that you’re wearing? Do you have allergies in general? Try to figure out what the issue is and that’s the first step.”
Photo courtesy of Davlyn Mosely
On how to tackle a common dermatological concern, traction alopecia, affecting Black women:
“Prevention is key,” Dr. McKinley-Grant explains. “Avoid tight ponytails, braids, and other styles that pull on your scalp. Brushing the hair causes more breakage; gently smoothing down your edges with a light oil is a good way to go. If you wear a weave, the cornrows shouldn’t be too tight and the weight of the hair is also something to consider. Glues and other adhesives can also pull out your hair. Traction alopecia can become scarring hair loss. Once you get the scarring the hair doesn’t come back. There are procedures to resolve this like scalp reduction surgery.”
Their current skincare must-haves:
“I’m a fan of Clinical’s ProHeal Serum. It’s a great anti-aging, vitamin C serum that absorbs nicely and adds a bit of a glow to the skin,” Dr. McKinley-Grant shares.
For Davlyn, “I’ve been loving this mineral sunscreen from Koa Skin. It’s hydrating but not greasy and it doesn’t break me out or leave a white cast on my skin. The packaging is super cute and I actually love using it every day.”
On how to upgrade your skincare routine from winter into spring:
Dr. McKinley-Grant says, “Our skin needs extra moisture during the winter months but as we head into spring you’ll likely find that your skin doesn’t need as much. You may benefit from using lighter sunscreen than you would have used in the winter.”
How keeping a simple, consistent skincare regime has been the key to Davlyn’s timeless, youthful skin:
“People are always shocked when I tell them I’m 37. My audience on TikTok is younger anyway and assumed I was their age,” Davlyn shares amusingly. “My whole life I’ve used skincare with ingredients that are highly researched and clinically tested. I’ve always tried to be very gentle with my skin and always keep it moisturized. I think consistency is really important. Having this simple, consistent routine most of my life has paid off, thanks to my mom.”
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Feature image courtesy of Davlyn Mosley and Dr. McKinley-Grant
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When I asked a few women I know if they ever tried that before, I was surprised to discover that not only had they, but many didn’t treat it as some random social media fad — they actually still do it to this day. Partly, because it’s fun to them and partly because their partner(s) seem to go crazy for it.
Listen, any time something sexual works like a charm, I’m going to shout it out — (late) trend or not. And so, if you’ve never heard of the whole coconut thing, you tried it and forgot all about it, or you just want to try something new/different/else tonight — here’s a reminder, in article form, that coconut-ting is still alive and well, y’all. And the men are all about it!
But First, The Grapefruit Technique
Video Credit: Myem/YouTube (Funny part starts at 2:40)
If this woman is not familiar to you on sight, you ain’t a real one. LOL. Although I know that a lot of people think that the concept of grapefruiting came from the movie Girls Trip (you can see the clip from the film here) that absolutely is not the case. Auntie Angel (whose real name is reportedly Denise Walker) is the creator of the Grapefruit Technique and although I thought that this video came out way earlier, apparently it made its way onto the YouTube streets sometime back in 2014.
If for some reason, you’re not familiar with grapefruiting on any level, I will tell you right now that I had to download this video because it is absolutely NSFW — so you should probably watch it on your lunch break (on your phone with the volume as low as possible) or at home…because chile, the sound effects? Whew, the sound effects. LOL. However, when I sat down to pen this piece, I thought it was hilarious that this video is what immediately came to mind because it seems like, when it comes to “blow his mind sex hacks,” fruit is constantly on the menu.
When it comes to oral sex, it’s grapefruit.
When it comes to ride ‘em cowgirl, it’s a coconut.
What Is the “Coconut” Sex Trend?
@windy_moraba #duet with @mysteri0us.gir1 spell coconut with your waist 😂😂😂
Okay, so what in the world does a coconut have to do with intercourse? Well, for starters, if you and your partner are looking for an all-natural lubricant, coconut oil works well. HOWEVER, do keep in mind that the disclaimer on this is you shouldn’t use it if condoms are in the mix because they can actually cause rubbers to be less effective (silicone lube is a solid bet for condoms, by the way).
There is another way that coconuts are kinda-sorta incorporated when it comes to making sex more pleasurable — and it actually became pretty popular right after COVID lockdown (2021): spelling C-O-C-O-N-U-T with your hips while you’re on top of your partner.
It’s wild how I forgot all about this until a client of mine was telling me how much her husband liked her on top while it wasn’t her favorite thing to do because it felt awkward to her. When I said, “Have you ever heard of spelling ‘coconut’ with your hips before?” — at first, she looked at me like I was crazy and then she busted out laughing: “Girl, no” was her reply.
Hmph. Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it because, as wild as it might sound on the surface, the word isn’t the point so much as the movements that come with spelling it out are.
When you’re moving your pelvis around to make a “c,” “o” or U-turn, not only does it intensify the level of sensation that both you and your partner feel during intercourse, it can also increase the level of blood circulation to both of your genitalia which can make your orgasms more satisfying too.
At the end of the day, spelling “coconut” is simply reminding you that there are more options to riding than simply sitting there while your partner pumps for all he’s worth or you humping up and down like you’re on a pogo stick.
Spelling “coconut” is an easy hack to bring some variety into cowgirling. However…
Honestly, the “Fruit” Isn’t the Point. THIS IS.
GiphyFrom grapefruiting and spelling “coconut” to reading articles that I’ve penned for the platform like “How To Improve The Taste Of Sperm” — fruit and sex are always going to be a winning combination, one way or another. However, the main point of this article isn’t about making sure that you are a master speller so much as providing you with tips that will make the cowgirl position something that you are confident about and you find a ton of fulfillment in doing.
You can make both of these things happen by incorporating the following things:
Stretch beforehand. A charley horse during sex is the worst thing ever — and chile, don’t let it be right before you’re about to climax. SMDH. Yeah, if you want to feel more comfortable when you’re on top, make sure that you stretch beforehand and that you are well-hydrated. That will reduce the chances of experiencing a totally-out-of-nowhere muscle spasm — whether you decide to “spell” during sex or…not.
Bring pillows into the mix. Sometimes riding is a challenge because your partner feels farther away from your body than you would like. Putting a pillow underneath him can help to elevate his pelvis, so that you don’t feel like you’re stretching and straining. Speaking of pillows, a longer one can really come in handy because it can give your knees some additional support as well.
Also, ask him to put his knees up. Speaking of making the “grind” easier for you, ask your partner to put his knees up. That way, your back can recline on his legs as you’re moving your hips around. You’d be amazed how much this one hack can do for you. Straight up.
Add lube. When you get a chance, check out “The Wetter, The Better: 10 Creative Ways To Use Lubricant” and you will automatically see why bringing lubrication into a cowgirl session is an absolute must. It reduces friction. It makes your movements glide with ease. And it’s just more fun. Promise you that.
Lean in. If your partner happens to be on the larger side of life, one way that you can control his depth is by leaning forward into him. That way, your hips can better control how much or little he is inside of you, so that you can get into a position that gives you the sensation that you are looking for.
Get him to multitask. Again, whether you are spelling “coconut” or not and whether you are riding cowgirl or reverse cowgirl — something that is awesome about being on top is it frees your partner’s hands to do, umm, other things. And since it is so much easier to have an orgasm while your clitoris is being stimulated, get your partner to put some of the lube that we discussed earlier on his fingertips, so that he can gently rub on your clitoris while you are riding him. It doesn’t get much better than that!
Don’t wanna spell? Hula Hoop then. What if you try the whole coconut thing and it’s not a favorite for you (or him)? No problem — when’s the last time that you hula hooped? Pretend that you have one of those around your hips and move around that way. I’d be shocked if you ended up feeling “meh” about that option.
5 Guys Tell Me What They Love When Their Partner Is on Top
GiphyA part of the reason why I am “team cowgirl” is because it provides a lot of benefits to the woman: she has more control, it tends to be more comfortable for her, it’s a great position for a quickie and the orgasms tend to be that much more — wonderful. However, as I was thinking about spelling coconut, in general, I couldn’t help but wonder what guys thought about it and the cowgirl position overall.
If you’re curious, here’s what five of ‘em said.
1. Braxford. Engaged. 35. “Y’all be spelling up there? Who knew? My favorite thing about when my fiancée is on top is what I think every man likes: the view. It’s a chance to see her entire body and experience it at the same time. Not even doggy style accomplishes that. Damn, where’s my lady at?”
2. Denez. Single. 42. “Do you know how many ‘spots’ you have access to when y’all are on top? Breasts are in my mouth. Hickeys are on her neck. Prop my head up on a pillow and her tummy is getting licked. When a woman is riding you, it’s sensory overload! It’s crazy how each one looks amazing in that position too.”
3. Omar. In a Serious Relationship. 29. “[He said her name yet I’m not going to share it] isn’t a very vocal lover. Her body and technique are insane, so even though I love dirty talk, I’ve learned to compromise — except when she’s on top. She’s not saying much but those moans? And yeah, we tried the coconut thing. ‘Cs’ and ‘Os,’ hell yeah. ‘Ns’ and “Ts’? Nah.”
4. Nolen. Single. 45. “45 isn’t old but it’s old enough for your back to show out on you when you least expect it. My experience has been that women don’t want a lot of thrusting when they are on top, so it’s like having some of the best sex without having to do much at all. Well, aside from trying not to bust too quickly. I take that back: riding is easy on the body; it’s work on the brain.”
5. Ivan. Married. 37. “I like the spelling sh-t because it switches things up. We make a game out of it by her picking a word and spelling out while I try and guess what it is. We also try to see how many words that we can get to before one of us cums. 12 words is pushing it unless it’s like ‘dog’ or ‘cat’ or something. I’ve guessed ‘coconut’ a few times and I get what the excitement is all about. Spelling bee sex: try it.”
Yep. I concur.
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Featured image by Giphy