Exclusive: 'The High Note' Star Kelvin Harrison Jr. On Self-Work, Love & Vulnerability

Kelvin Harrison Jr. isn't exactly who you'd call "Mr. Romantic". In fact, he doesn't really know who that guy is at all. That's a side he hasn't really tapped into in a "long time." And honestly, who could blame him? Between making waves alongside some of Hollywood's biggest names, such as Sterling K. Brown, Issa Rae, Octavia Spencer, Forest Whitaker and now hitting sweet high notes with the likes of Tracee Ellis Ross––Kelvin really doesn't have time for romance.
But what he does have time for is journaling, perhaps even more so thanks to this seemingly never-ending quarantine. In fact, one could argue that journaling is actually his new love. Admitting to being put on by one of his actor friends during the start of his career, Kelvin divulges that journaling has now become the outlet where he feels free to release all of his thoughts instead of unhealthily keeping them inside. "I think what's been so cool about the quarantine is that it's allowed me the time to reflect and so I journal a lot," he tells xoNecole over the phone on a midweek afternoon. "Every audition, big moments, it's literally a library of understanding the psychology behind what you're experiencing. I found journaling to be a safe space for me to always be transparent with myself and I'm always in-tune with my feelings––I think it's required of me with the job."
And if you needed further proof of that, look no further than his latest film The High Note. In it, Kelvin stars as the sarcastic yet mysteriously talented musician who takes an up-and-coming-music-producer-slash-overworked-personal-assistant (Dakota Johnson) up on her offer to help make his album. As we watch the musical journey progress over the course of the film, we also get a glimpse inside another layer into the Kelvin's pool of talent.
All of Kelvin's songs on The High Note's soundtrack are sung by him and him alone (the same goes for the duet he has with Tracee). There are no voiceovers, no heavy auto-tune, just a man and his arguably impressive vocals. And while he admits to holding some insecurity against his voice, much like his co-star Tracee, it was the time in the studio with Grammy Award-winning producer Rodney "Darkchild" Jerkins that proved to be the most eye-opening part of the whole process. "I learned so much from Rodney, our producer, about story-telling and personalizing lyrics and allowing it to be an extension of my acting. Like now when I go back to do a serious drama, I think that was a great tool because I can kind of use my melody once again."
xoNecole got the chance to briefly chat with the New Orleans native about The High Note, vulnerability, and why he feels love shouldn't have to feel right to be worth it. Read on to see what he had to say.
xoNecole: You've had quite a busy year: 'Luce', 'Waves', 'Godfather of Harlem', 'The Photograph', and now 'The High Note'. So tell me, have you had a high note career-wise thus far?
Kelvin Harris Jr.: Yeah, I mean I think I looked back at some of that stuff in my journal and I was like I have grown so much in the past five months. I got to go to London for the first time and I was nominated for a BAFTA and that was really cool. That was a really big moment for me, that was a high note. And my two best friends that I talk to every day, they've been a high note for me––but that's kind of been my quarantine and life and my career things. So, there have been a lot of beautiful moments.
What was your favorite part of filming 'The High Note'?
I think it had to be the time in the studio. As much as I was afraid of going in there, there's always that insecurity and that fear when you're doing something you haven't done before, so I was very vulnerable. But at the same time, I think that vulnerability that we bring to the table, it's all interconnected.
I love that you brought that up because I know vulnerability can be a tough but necessary road to navigate especially as a young Black man. And in light of everything going on, it can be sacred to hold onto as we know the next day isn’t exactly promised to us. How did you get comfortable enough to tap into that side of yourself? I know it’s probably still a work in progress…
It is, I think it's been a long process with just getting to know me. But I think once again the journaling has had a huge part of that. We have so much going on and so much that happens from ages zero to 14 that we carry with us--and then as adults, we sometimes try to move because we have to operate in the real world. And we have people to please and expectations of us, and obligations. And even after 14, you're in high school and now it's like you have to get ready for college so you can get ready for life. I think putting myself in vulnerable positions, I always know that some growth is gonna happen because of it. Because if I look at the patterns it's like, "OK, when I did this: what did I feel?" Or, "This helped me do this, and that allowed me to learn this about myself." It's an ongoing pattern of success because there are no real failures when you look at it that way. So, I've learned that vulnerability is a weapon, it's a tool, and it's a good thing.
"We have so much going on and so much that happens from ages zero to 14 that we carry with us--and then as adults, we sometimes try to move because we have to operate in the real world. And we have people to please and expectations of us, and obligations. And even after 14, you're in high school and now it's like you have to get ready for college so you can get ready for life. I think putting myself in vulnerable positions, I always know that some growth is gonna happen because of it."
You mentioned earlier that the quarantine has allowed you the time to do some serious self-reflection. What new revelations have you come to learn about yourself that you didn't know previously?
It's not even just in quarantine really but, it definitely has taught me that I still have work to do. I came into this knowing, after I did this movie called Waves, I was like: 'OK, after this I need to go get therapy and I need to do a fun rom-com.' So, I got the therapist going, I did this rom-com, I'm like, 'Cool, cool, cool. We're having fun, we're not taking ourselves too seriously, we're repairing old damage, we're getting better, we're loving harder. We're implementing our boundaries, we're doing self-work, we're taking time for ourselves.' And so I came into quarantine like, 'Oh, I'll be fine.' But the quarantine doesn't work like that. (laughs) I still have a lot of stuff to do. And it's been interesting because I've been listening to that Lauryn Hill MTV Unplugged "I Gotta Have Peace Of Mind" and she says something like, "Sometimes we think we need to retreat when we have problems and stuff going on in our lives, but really it's about confrontation, confronting those things."
That's been on my mind since the beginning of quarantine and so I've just been taking it one day at a time. When I'm triggered by something or something upsets me, or something brings me great joy. I ask the question, 'Why? Why did it do that?' And being OK with the fact that I'm still in progress and there's still work to do. And not tricking myself to believing that I've arrived--no one has--because we still have much more to do.
I want to switch up and talk a bit about love. Does that sound good?
Yeah, I'm down.
As millennials, there’s often a lot of talk around how we define modern love and relationships. So, I want to know for you, what's something that you think we tend to over-complicate or over-simplify when it comes to love?
That's an interesting question (laughs). I don't really know I've seen a lot of different things. In my own experience, I've seen versions of codependency, I've seen people not respecting their boundaries. I'm really big on boundaries right now. I've seen people thinking that love doesn't require work and that relationships don't require work. It's an ongoing process. I do think though that there's a lot of relearning of individuals as we grow with partners––we both have to grow at the same time or at least be actively working on yourself. If one falls off, then suddenly we're not of the same mindset, so that's not sustainable.
I think everyone's on different journeys, but the most common thing is that it doesn't take work. Or that it's supposed to be easy or feel 'RIGHT'. Everything's supposed to feel right. But also on the other side of that, there's trauma bonding, there's flames––people always talk about 'twin flames' that happen sometimes. I think there are a lot of things we aren't aware of that can cause relationships to suddenly seem like that's the new moment. But it will only be a moment if you're not continuing to do the self-work. It takes work.
"I've seen people thinking that love doesn't require work and that relationships don't require work. It's an ongoing process. I do think though that there's a lot of relearning of individuals as we grow with partners––we both have to grow at the same time or at least be actively working on yourself. If one falls off, then suddenly we're not of the same mindset, so that's not sustainable. I think everyone's on different journeys, but the most common thing is that it doesn't take work."
Who is Kelvin as a romantic partner?
Currently I don't know who I am as a romantic partner (laughs). I'm pooped when it comes to finding relationships or finding people. And where I'm still at in my work--it's important that I'm not shrinking myself for someone or trying to "lift someone up". I have the tendency sometimes to want to play the "savior", I want to save or I feel like I need to be saved. Right now, I've been feeling like I need to be focused on my job, so I've been focusing on work. And that's the only thing going on right now (laughs). I don't really know who that guy is. He hasn't been explored in some time, in a long time.
So, when you do get to that place where you maybe want to start looking for a relationship, what are some of your non-negotiables?
To be honest, I make lists--I do make lists. And I know some people think lists are crazy, but I make them based truly on what things I think are necessary. I feel like, for me, I need you to understand what art is, you have to love movies--you don't have to know movies--but you have to at least appreciate and love them and want to watch them. You have to be independent…
I was wondering if you were going to mention that. I saw you speak on that in another recent interview with Tracee Ellis Ross…
Yeah, she has to be independent, independence is sexy. It's very sexy. I just want a secure attachment-style (laughs). You go over there and do your thing and when we come back and we're together, it's amazing. Everyone's looking for that––well. I take that back, some people aren't. Based off some of the stuff I've seen (laughs)...
Last question, because I know you’ve got to go. Do you know your love languages and if so what are they?
I like quality time. Physical touch. And I'm not gonna lie, I like gifts (laughs).
(Laughs) Gifts aren’t a bad thing at all.
Yeah, I like things (laughs). But yeah gifts, physical touch, and quality time, those are the top ones. Those other ones I can do without.
The High Note is available for video on demand now and for more of Kelvin, keep up with him on Instagram.
Featured image by Ron Adar / Shutterstock.com
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Because We Are Still IT, Girl: It Girl 100 Returns
Last year, when our xoNecole team dropped our inaugural It Girl 100 honoree list, the world felt, ahem, a bit brighter.
It was March 2024, and we still had a Black woman as the Vice President of the United States. DEI rollbacks weren’t being tossed around like confetti. And more than 300,000 Black women were still gainfully employed in the workforce.
Though that was just nineteen months ago, things were different. Perhaps the world then felt more receptive to our light as Black women.
At the time, we launched It Girl 100 to spotlight the huge motion we were making as dope, GenZennial Black women leaving our mark on culture. The girls were on the rise, flourishing, drinking their water, minding their business, leading companies, and learning to do it all softly, in rest. We wanted to celebrate that momentum—because we love that for us.
So, we handpicked one hundred It Girls who embody that palpable It Factor moving through us as young Black women, the kind of motion lighting up the world both IRL and across the internet.
It Girl 100 became xoNecole’s most successful program, with the hashtag organically reaching more than forty million impressions on Instagram in just twenty-four hours. Yes, it caught on like wildfire because we celebrated some of the most brilliant and influential GenZennial women of color setting trends and shaping culture. But more than that, it resonated because the women we celebrated felt seen.
Many were already known in their industries for keeping this generation fly and lit, but rarely received recognition or flowers. It Girl 100 became a safe space to be uplifted, and for us as Black women to bask in what felt like an era of our brilliance, beauty, and boundless influence on full display.
And then, almost overnight, it was as if the rug was pulled from under us as Black women, as the It Girls of the world.
Our much-needed, much-deserved season of ease and soft living quickly metamorphosed into a time of self-preservation and survival. Our motion and economic progression seemed strategically slowed, our light under siege.
The air feels heavier now. The headlines colder. Our Black girl magic is being picked apart and politicized for simply existing.
With that climate shift, as we prepare to launch our second annual It Girl 100 honoree list, our team has had to dig deep on the purpose and intention behind this year’s list. Knowing the spirit of It Girl 100 is about motion, sauce, strides, and progression, how do we celebrate amid uncertainty and collective grief when the juice feels like it is being squeezed out of us?
As we wrestled with that question, we were reminded that this tension isn’t new. Black women have always had to find joy in the midst of struggle, to create light even in the darkest corners. We have carried the weight of scrutiny for generations, expected to be strong, to serve, to smile through the sting. But this moment feels different. It feels deeply personal.
We are living at the intersection of liberation and backlash. We are learning to take off our capes, to say no when we are tired, to embrace softness without apology.
And somehow, the world has found new ways to punish us for it.

In lifestyle, women like Kayla Nicole and Ayesha Curry have been ridiculed for daring to choose themselves. Tracee Ellis Ross was labeled bitter for speaking her truth about love. Meghan Markle, still, cannot breathe without critique.
In politics, Kamala Harris, Letitia James, and Jasmine Crockett are dragged through the mud for standing tall in rooms not built for them.
In sports, Angel Reese, Coco Gauff, and Taylor Townsend have been reminded that even excellence will not shield you from racism or judgment.

In business, visionaries like Diarrha N’Diaye-Mbaye and Melissa Butler are fighting to keep their dreams alive in an economy that too often forgets us first.
Even our icons, Beyoncé, Serena, and SZA, have faced criticism simply for evolving beyond the boxes society tried to keep them in.
From everyday women to cultural phenoms, the pattern is the same. Our light is being tested.

And yet, somehow, through it all, we are still showing up as that girl, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Because while the world debates our worth, we keep raising our value. And that proof is all around us.
This year alone, Naomi Osaka returned from motherhood and mental health challenges to reach the semifinals of the US Open. A’ja Wilson claimed another MVP, reminding us that beauty and dominance can coexist. Brandy and Monica are snatching our edges on tour. Kahlana Barfield Brown sold out her new line in the face of a retailer that had been canceled. And Melissa Butler’s company, The Lip Bar, is projecting a forty percent surge in sales.

We are no longer defining strength by how much pain we can endure. We are defining it by the unbreakable light we continue to radiate.
We are the women walking our daily steps and also continuing to run solid businesses. We are growing in love, taking solo trips, laughing until it hurts, raising babies and ideas, drinking our green juice, and praying our peace back into existence.
We are rediscovering the joy of rest and realizing that softness is not weakness, it is strategy.
And through it all, we continue to lift one another. Emma Grede is creating seats at the table. Valeisha Butterfield has started a fund for jobless Black women. Arian Simone is leading in media with fearless conviction. We are pouring into each other in ways the world rarely sees but always feels.

So yes, we are in the midst of societal warfare. Yes, we are being tested. Yes, we are facing economic strain, political targeting, and public scrutiny. But even war cannot dim a light that is divinely ours.
And we are still shining.
And we are still softening.
And we are still creating.
And we are still It.

That is the quiet magic of Black womanhood, our ability to hold both truth and triumph in the same breath, to say yes, and to life’s contradictions.
It is no coincidence that this year, as SheaMoisture embraces the message “Yes, And,” they stand beside us as partners in celebrating this class of It Girls. Because that phrase, those two simple words, capture the very essence of this moment.
Yes, we are tired. And we are still rising.
Yes, we are questioned. And we are the answer.
Yes, we are bruised. And we are still beautiful.

This year’s It Girl 100 is more than a list. It is a love letter to every Black woman who dares to live out loud in a world that would rather she whisper. This year’s class is living proof of “Yes, And,” women who are finding ways to thrive and to heal, to build and to rest, to lead and to love, all at once.
It is proof that our joy is not naive, our success not accidental. It is the reminder that our light has never needed permission.
So without further ado, we celebrate the It Girl 100 Class of 2025–2026.
We celebrate the millions of us who keep doing it with grace, grit, and glory.
Because despite it all, we still shine.
Because we are still her.
Because we are still IT, girl.
Meet all 100 women shaping culture in the It Girl 100 Class of 2025. View the complete list of honorees here.
Featured image by xoStaff
These Black Women Left Their Jobs To Turn Their Wildest Dreams Into Reality
“I’m too big for a f***ing cubicle!” Those thoughts motivated Randi O to kiss her 9 to 5 goodbye and step into her dreams of becoming a full-time social media entrepreneur. She now owns Randi O P&R. Gabrielle, the founder of Raw Honey, was moving from state to state for her corporate job, and every time she packed her suitcases for a new zip code, she regretted the loss of community and the distance in her friendships. So she created a safe haven and village for queer Black people in New York.
Then there were those who gave up their zip code altogether and found a permanent home in the skies. After years spent recruiting students for a university, Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare became a full-time travel influencer and founded her travel company, Shakespeare Agency. And she's not alone.
These stories mirror the experiences of women across the world. For millions, the pandemic induced a seismic shift in priorities and desires. Corporate careers that were once hailed as the ultimate “I made it” moment in one's career were pushed to the back burner as women quit their jobs in search of a more self-fulfilling purpose.
xoNecole spoke to these three Black women who used the pandemic as a springboard to make their wildest dreams a reality, the lessons they learned, and posed the question of whether they’ll ever return to cubicle life.
Answers have been edited for context and length.
xoNecole: How did the pandemic lead to you leaving the cubicle?
Randi: I was becoming stagnant. I was working in mortgage and banking but I felt like my personality was too big for that job! From there, I transitioned to radio but was laid off during the pandemic. That’s what made me go full throttle with entrepreneurship.
Gabrielle: I moved around a lot for work. Five times over a span of seven years. I knew I needed a break because I had experienced so much. So, I just quit one day. Effective immediately. I didn’t know what I was going to do, I just knew I needed a break and to just regroup.
Lisa-Gaye: I was working in recruiting at a university and my dream job just kind of fell into my lap! But, I never got to fully enjoy it before the world shut down in March [2020] and I was laid off. On top of that, I was stuck in Miami because Jamaica had closed its borders due to the pandemic before I was able to return.

Randi O
xoN: Tell us about your journey after leaving Corporate America.
Randi: I do it all now! I have a podcast, I’m an on-air talent, I act, and I own a public relations company that focuses on social media engagement. It’s all from my network. When you go out and start a business, you can’t just say, “Okay I’m done with Corporate America,” and “Let me do my own thing.” If you don’t build community, if you don’t build a network it's going to be very hard to sustain.
Gabrielle: I realized in New York, there was not a lot to do for Black lesbians and queer folks. We don’t really have dedicated bars and spaces so I started doing events and it took off. I started focusing on my brand, Raw Honey. I opened a co-working space, and I was able to host an NYC Pride event in front of 100,000 people. I hit the ground running with Raw Honey. My events were all women coming to find community and come together with other lesbians and queer folks. I found my purpose in that.
Lisa-Gaye: After being laid off, I wrote out all of my passions and that’s how I came up with [my company] Shakespeare Agency. It was all of the things that I loved to do under one umbrella. The pandemic pulled that out of me. I had a very large social media following, so I pitched to hotels that I would feature them on my blog and social media. This reignited my passion for travel. I took the rest of the year to refocus my brand to focus solely on being a content creator within the travel space.

Gabrielle
xoN: What have you learned about yourself during your time as an entrepreneur?
Randi: [I learned] the importance of my network and community that I created. When I was laid off I was still keeping those relationships with people that I used to work with. So it was easy for me to transition into social media management and I didn’t have to start from scratch.
Gabrielle: The biggest thing I learned about myself was my own personal identity as a Black lesbian and how much I had assimilated into straight and corporate culture and not being myself. Now, I feel comfortable and confident being my authentic self. Now, I'm not sacrificing anything else for my career. I have a full life. I have friends. I have a social life. And when you are happy and have a full quality of life, I feel like [I] can have more longevity in my career.
Lisa-Gaye: [I'm doing] the best that I've ever done. The discipline that I’m building within myself. Nobody is saying, ‘Oh you have to be at work at this time.’ There’s no boss saying, ‘Why are you late?’ But, if I’m laying in bed at 10 a.m. then it's me saying [to myself], 'Okay, Lisa, get up, it's time for you to start working!’ That’s all on me.
xoNecole: What mistakes do you want to help people avoid when leaving Corporate America?
Randi: You have to learn about the highs and lows of entrepreneurship. You have a fast season and a slow season and I started to learn that when you're self-employed the latter season hits hard. Don't get caught up on the lows, just keep going and don't stop. I’m glad I did.
Gabrielle: I think everyone should quit their job and just figure it out for a second. You will discover so much about yourself when you take a second to just focus on you. Your skill set will always be there. You can’t be afraid of what will happen when you bet on yourself.
Lisa-Gaye: When it comes to being an influencer the field is saturated and a lot of people suffer from imposter syndrome. There is nothing wrong with being an imposter but find out how to make it yours, how to make it better. If you go to the store, you see 10 million different brands of bread! But you are choosing the brand that you like because you like that particular flavor.
So be an imposter, but be the best imposter of yourself and add your own flair, your own flavor. Make the better bread. The bread that you want.

Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare
xoNecole: Will you ever return to your 9 to 5?
Randi: I wouldn’t go back to Corporate America. But I don’t mind working under someone. A lot of people try to get into this business saying, “I can't work under anyone.” That’s not necessarily the reason to start a business because you're always going to answer to somebody. Clients, brands, there’s always someone else involved.
Gabrielle: I went back! I really needed a break and I gave myself that. But, I realized I’m a corporate girl, [and] I enjoy the work that I do. I’m good at it and I really missed that side of myself. I have different sides of me and my whole identity is not Raw Honey or my queerness. A big side of me is business and that’s why I love having my career. Now I feel like my best self.
Lisa-Gaye: I really don’t. For right now, I love working for myself. It's gratifying, it's challenging, it's exciting. It’s a big deal for me to say I own my own business. That I am my own boss, and I'm a Black woman doing it.
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Featured image courtesy of Lisa-Gaye Shakespeare
Originally published on February 6, 2023









