This Couple Fell In Love At First Sight. A Decade Later, They’re On A Forever Honeymoon.
How We Met is a series where xoNecole talks love and relationships with real-life couples. We learn how they met, how like turned into love, and how they make their love work.
Anybody who's ever told you love at first sight was a myth was a damn lie and you can tell them Jasmine and Alex Sweet said it.
The couple initially met during their junior year of college and a decade and almost three years of marriage later, Jasmine and Alex are out here proving that Black love is alive and well in these streets and we love to see it. The duo, who make it their mission to honeymoon at least once a year, recently sat down with xoNecole and broke down the beginnings of their modern-day love story and explained that the secret to a successful long-term commitment is coming to the table as a whole ass person.
"Alex and I have always been pretty complete individuals. We didn't complete each other necessarily. We enhanced one another, and that's what made our situation unique," Jasmine shared. "We both worked really hard at who we were and appreciate each other for it. I think that's why we weren't afraid of the commitment. It was like, 'I got this because we got this!'"
"Alex and I have always been pretty complete individuals. We didn't complete each other necessarily. We enhanced one another, and that's what made our situation unique."
Despite spending months apart while chasing their dreams, the couple says that because they were focused on both their commitment to themselves and one another, they were able to pass every test with flying colors. "We were individually taking care of business to set ourselves up for each other. We weren't in a rush to get married. We were in a rush to prepare ourselves for life in general––job transitions, friends and family woes, but we were committed to each other. It was a soul tie that even we haven't been able to explain."
We talked more with Jasmine and Alex about falling in love at first sight, becoming the best version of themselves for one another, and how they've made the last two years feel like a never-ending honeymoon.
Here's what we learned:
How They Met
Jasmine: We met in college at the University of Memphis. I was pledging Alpha Kappa Alpha and he was pledging Alpha Phi Alpha in 2009. They crossed before my line did, and I saw him at a university talent show. I was hosting the event when I saw him in the crowd. I'd been pretty active on campus in different leadership roles and had never seen him before.
Later, I found out he ran track! Athletes don't get out much! As he and his line brothers were strolling around the talent show, I told my line sisters, "I want the one no one knows!" (laughs) I'd been in college for three years and was convinced my husband was nowhere to be found until I saw Alex! Little did I know, he was from Memphis and well-known! But that didn't change my mind about him!
Alex: We met in college, officially at a restaurant near the campus of the U of M. The story of how we exchanged information, as well as our first dance, is a legendary story.
First Impressions
Jasmine: I loved him from the start! Alex is the epitome of his last name––SWEET! I honestly don't know how I got so lucky. He was suave and sweet at the same time and that intrigued me. Well-spoken! Gentle! Honest! Funny! Sooooo loving.
Alex: When I first saw her, I instantly knew she was the flyest lady I have ever seen. I just wanted to be in her presence at all times, and still do.
Instant Attraction
Jasmine: No, It was love at first sight! Ha! Something in my soul felt it.
Alex: Instant. From that day, 10 years ago, the only thing I wanted to do was to be with her. I started seeing her in my dreams for the future. I knew my life was going to change forever, she was going to be in it. Crazy when I think about it, but that's how falling in love felt to me.
"From that day, 10 years ago, the only thing I wanted to do was to be with her. I started seeing her in my dreams for the future. I knew my life was going to change forever, she was going to be in it. Crazy when I think about it, but that's how falling in love felt to me."
First Date
Jasmine: My memory fails me [about our first date]. When it comes to us because we lived so much life together and grown up together. Our first phone conversation was on Christmas Eve. He'd had my phone number for two weeks, and hadn't called. I was over him! Then, he called while he was building his little brother's toys for Christmas. I melted over the phone.
We talked all night until the sun came up. I was home in Jackson for Christmas break, but when I got back to the University of Memphis campus, I invited him over. He came and there we were talking all night again. He was it for me.
Making It Official
Jasmine: It didn't take us very long to make things official. I remember the day he asked me to be his girlfriend. It was February 5, 2010. He actually gave a formal speech about how he didn't want to play any games. As cliche as it sounds, he was dead serious. I was shocked that he named everything that he loved about me and how he wanted to grow with me. He was 19 and I was 20. How could this be? Where had he been the first three years of college? I often felt like he was too good to be true, but he was real and it felt so good. Alex is a calm-spirited individual who is so loyal, and if he gives you his word, he means it.
"It didn't take us very long to make things official. I remember the day he asked me to be his girlfriend. It was February 5, 2010. He actually gave a formal speech about how he didn't want to play any games. As cliche as it sounds, he was dead serious. I was shocked that he named everything that he loved about me and how he wanted to grow with me. He was 19 and I was 20."
Alex: This a true black college love story. Two individuals in their respected organizations meet at a college party and share a moment on the dance floor together. Nothing is said, he leaves only to find her later. I was the initiator. I wanted her to know from that point on, it's Alex and Jasmine. We dated. We still date. We went to the parties together in college holding hands. We still go out holding hands into the lounge, movies, or just through the mall.
The One
Jasmine: I hate being away from Alex. 10 years later and I die a little inside at the thought of him not being here. I lost my dad a few years ago. He and my mom were married for 42 years. I sometimes just stare at Alex and think about what our long-term lives look like. Then, I say a little prayer and just surrender thoughts of forever with him. That's love.
Alex: Once a person changes the way you look on the world and life, and realizing in every moment you want that person in the picture, you know [they are the one]––at least I did.
"I lost my dad a few years ago. He and my mom were married for 42 years. I sometimes just stare at Alex and think about what our long-term lives look like. Then, I say a little prayer and just surrender thoughts of forever with him. That's love."
The Sweetest Thing
Jasmine: I love that Alex has a vibrant spirit. There isn't a dull day in my house. I come home to music thumping through the house every day. He's laughing and joyful.
Alex: Jasmine has an energy that fills the room. She makes me feel like the most important person in the world. I also love how she allows me to make her feel like the Queen she is. A perfect balance.
Love Lessons
Jasmine: Love is the best adventure of our lifetime and you have to love fearlessly. He is my person and I'll go to war for him at all costs.
Alex: This team we have [is] the best team I could ask for in this game of life. True love will have you doing whatever it takes to live the best life with each other.
Overcoming Challenges
Jasmine: We've encountered a particular issue that I won't speak of that challenged our love, but it was such a strong one that it challenged us in a way that we loved even harder. We welcome challenges because we learned how to let the Devil know who's in charge. Our marriage counselors, Rob and Robin have taught us techniques to recognize when we're letting external forces control the narrative. Now, we ward them out immediately. Don't come for our house.
"We welcome challenges because we learned how to let the Devil know who's in charge. Our marriage counselors, Rob and Robin have taught us techniques to recognize when we're letting external forces control the narrative. Now, we ward them out immediately. Don't come for our house."
Alex: Patience and understanding. We have to remind ourselves, we are only human. And at the end of the day, we have to understand we may think differently of a lot of things, we share the same goal of loving each other to the best of our ability.
For more Jasmine and Alex, follow them on Instagram!
Featured image by @jasminesweet.
Taylor "Pretty" Honore is a spiritually centered and equally provocative rapper from Baton Rouge, Louisiana with a love for people and storytelling. You can probably find me planting herbs in your local community garden, blasting "Back That Thang Up" from my mini speaker. Let's get to know each other: @prettyhonore.
Devale Ellis On Being A Provider, Marriage Growth & Redefining Fatherhood
In this candid episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker talked with Devale Ellis, actor, social media personality, and star of Zatima, about modern masculinity, learning to be a better husband, emotional presence in marriage, fatherhood for Black men, and leading by example.
“I Wasn’t Present Emotionally”: Devale Ellis on Marriage Growth
Devale Ellis On Learning He Was a ‘Bad Husband’
Ellis grew up believing that a man should prioritize providing for his family. “I know this may come off as misogynistic, but I feel like it’s my responsibility as a man to pay for everything,” he said, emphasizing the wise guidance passed down by his father. However, five years into his marriage to long-time partner Khadeen Ellis, he realized provision wasn’t just financial.
“I was a bad husband because I wasn’t present emotionally… I wasn’t concerned about what she needed outside of the resources.”
Once he shifted his mindset, his marriage improved. “In me trying to be of service to her, I learned that me being of service created a woman who is now willing to be of service to me.”
On Redefining Masculinity and Fatherhood
For Ellis, “being a man is about being consistent.” As a father of four, he sees parenthood as a chance to reshape the future.
“Children give you another chance at life. I have four different opportunities right now to do my life all over again.”
He also works to uplift young Black men, reinforcing their worth in a world that often undermines them. His values extend to his career—Ellis refuses to play roles that involve domestic violence or sexual assault.
Watch the full episode below:
On Marriage, Family Planning, and Writing His Story
After his wife’s postpartum preeclampsia, Ellis chose a vasectomy over her taking hormonal birth control, further proving his commitment to their partnership. He and Khadeen share their journey in We Over Me, and his next book, Raising Kings: How Fatherhood Saved Me From Myself, is on the way.
Through honesty and growth, Devale Ellis challenges traditional ideas of masculinity, making his story one that resonates deeply with millennial women.
For the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker peels back the layers of masculinity with candid conversations that challenge stereotypes and celebrate vulnerability. Real men. Real stories. Real talk.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
Featured image by YouTube/xoNecole
6 Tabletop Sex Positions That'll Unlock You & Bae's Most Primal Desires
Something I will never tire of is finding new ways to bring new layers to intimacy. A wall you use as momentum, a bathroom sink to help you keep your balance as he worships you on his knees, a shower that is usually for cleansing but evolves into a sacred ritual of shared intimacy.
My favorite kind of sex is the kind of sex that prioritizes pleasure and connection. So, technically and thankfully, I can say most of my sex life has been quite pleasurable throughout the years. But the memorable encounters for sure take the cake. One such encounter actually took place on a kitchen counter, and with it unleashed inhibitions in ways I never anticipated while unlocking levels to top-tier sex. And that, that involved a kitchen counter.
Why Kitchen Counter Sex Just Hits Different
What is it about having your hips pressed into the edge of a kitchen counter that lets out something so primal in you? The cool-to-the-touch feel of the countertop against exposed skin as you rise to meet him again and again. The urgency in every movement. The playfulness of repurposing an everyday space for something far more erotic. If you’re looking to bring that energy into your own sex life, keep reading for positions and tips to explore.
1. The Bounce House
They don’t call it Bounce House for nothing. In this position, the penetrating partner lies flat on their back on a sturdy table or counter while the receiving partner straddles them, knees bent and facing away. With their hands gripping the edge of the surface for support, the receiving partner slides or bounces at their own pace, owning the rhythm, the motion, and the view.
According to sex therapist Michael Aaron, Ph.D., who spoke with Women’s Health, the receiving partner placing their legs between their partner’s creates a tighter sensation, while staying fully astride allows for more bounce and range of motion. Either way, this one puts the receiver in full control, and you know we love a good woman on top position. Pleasure and power? Say less.
2. The Bicycle
Well, you know what they say about riding a bike. In the case of this table top position, it's the receiving partner who is the rider...but not in the way you think. While lying back on a sturdy surface or a table, the receiver will bring their knees toward their chest, bending them as if in a cycling motion. The penetrating partner stands at the edge of the surface, grabbing the receiver's ankles, and guides themselves inside, slowly so as to savor the moment. This angle puts everything on display for the penetrating partner while allowing for deep, connected thrusting for the receiver.
To take things up a notch , the receiving partner can touch themselves or flex their thighs to control the depth or the rhythm. Because, who says only one person gets to have control?
3. Counter Offer
How could we be at the table and not use it to eat? Enter: Counter Offer. In this oral-focused sex position, the receiving partner perches on the edge of a counter or table, lying back or sitting upright with legs parted or bent for comfort. The penetrating partner kneels or stands between their thighs, depending on the setup and the kind of attention they’re ready to give. No doubt, this one’s all about access and intention.
With the vulva front and center, the height makes it easier to maintain eye contact, use hands freely for things like breast play or incorporating toys, and take their time with every moan-inducing taste. And that’s on five, six, seven, ATE.
4. Standing Doggy
Standing Doggy is what happens when a classic like doggy style gets an upgrade. Instead of being on all fours on a bed, the receiving partner bends over a hard surface like a table or counter, keeping their hips aligned at its edge. The penetrating partner stands behind and enters from the back, using the angle to go deeper and create a strong, steady rhythm. This one offers maximum control and visual appeal, especially if the penetrating partner reaches around for a little extra clitoral stimulation throughout thrusting.
This angle can get intense quickly, so bonus points if the receiving partner engages their pelvic floor muscles or shifts their weight to adjust how the pressure hits, especially if your goal is to hit that G-spot sweet spot.
5. Top Shelf
Men's Healthcalls this one "Yourself on the Shelf," but we like to call it "Top Shelf" because it's giving full view, full grip, and climax potential that's hard to top. The receiving partner sits on the edge of a sturdy table or counter while the penetrating partner stands in front of them and slowly slides in, thrusting while keeping them in position. From there, legs can wrap around their waist, arms can encircle their back, and the closeness at peak ecstasy? Chef's kiss.
If you have the core strength, add lifting to the menu for the final strokes leading to orgasm. Otherwise, allow the surface to the heavy lifting and enjoy the pleasure.
6. The Thumper
What better way to remind yourself that you're both the snack and the entrée than with a little tableside service courtesy of The Thumper? This position has the receiving partner kneeling on a sturdy table or counter (keyword: sturdy), hands gripping the edge or braced in front for support. The penetrating partner can then either kneel behind them (if there's room for two), or stay anchored on the ground with both feet planted on the floor (similar to the previously mentioned Standing Doggy). It all depends on the mood.
Kneeling on the table offers just the right amount of leverage for deep, steady strokes. The receiving partner can play with tightness by either keeping their knees closer together for a snug grip, or open their knees wider to invite more access, depth, and stretch. The Thumper is versatile that way, and the most important thing? The receiver gets to be the main course. Yum.
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Featured image by Shutterstock