

As an adult, one must accept bills as a constant part of life, so a stable income is important. But what would you do if you could have a job that offers flexibility, financial stability, and the opportunity to indulge your travel bug?
Let's face it: We expect more out of life than our parents, or their parents, ever did and the old-fashioned "work for the same company until you retire or die" thing isn't going to cut it for us anymore. The thought of working remotely would often pop into my head but I never really considered remote work as an option until I had a conversation with a young lady I met while dog sledding in Wyoming. She had talked her boss into letting her work remotely from a different country for a month every year. I was inspired and, on August 7, 2017, I submitted my proposal for working remotely to my boss!
Working remotely would be a dream come true for many people (like yours truly) who force themselves out of bed every morning just to make it to the office in time. So why haven't you asked your boss yet? The question is rhetorical. You're still young and you just want to try something different without having to give up your stable position to pursue it.
If only you knew the power you have, especially at work.
Once you've decided to take a leap of faith and ask about working remotely, you'll want to be very strategic in how you present your proposal. Though I'd like to believe my reputation for being a hard worker was the reason I was approved to work from Thailand for a month, it was actually my ability to develop a well-structured work plan that proved to my management team that it could be done. You definitely want to work out the logistics before presenting the idea to your boss if you want them to take your proposal seriously.
If you're considering pitching the idea of working remotely to your boss, here are a few steps to help you with preparing a proposal prior to the conversation. My hope is that you are not only inspired to work remotely but are given some helpful tips to make your work-and-travel dreams a reality.
Step 1: Don't Believe Beyoncé...You're Irreplaceable (Sort of)
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Anyone can be replaced. Before popping the question to your employer, make sure they value you enough to even entertain the idea of you working remotely. Are you an asset to the company? If you took a leave of absence for a week or month, could they manage without you?
Do they depend on you to get things done? This may sound arrogant but these are questions you'll need to ask yourself. Also, employers are often open to being more flexible for their star employees. So, ask yourself, are you a star?
Most people are surprised by the leverage they can have at work if they are great employees that can't be easily replaced. If you're not a star employee, there's always time to improve but you may want to hold off on packing your bags until you can show your boss that you can't easily be replaced.
Step 2: Do Your Research
Before you begin keying 'best beaches' into your search engine, start researching the country you are most interested in working remotely from. You want to select a country that won't make your remote work life difficult.
How will you work reliably while there? Do they offer work cafes or will you need to rent a workspace? Does the country have website/app restrictions that can only be accessed using a VPN? Is there a difference in time zones? What equipment and software will you need to ensure your daily work schedule goes as planned? How will shifting your work schedule impact your workflow?
These are some of the questions you will need to have answers to prior to submitting your proposal. There are many helpful blogs and articles online to help make the decision on location a tad bit easier.
Step 3: Creating the Proposal
Before pitching your idea to your boss, create a proposal that includes everything they'll need to know about the opportunity. Be sure to include your plan for handling your work responsibilities while abroad.
My six-page proposal listed everything from my remote work schedule to monthly meetings (my boss made it clear that I could not cancel meetings and would be expected to continue conducting meetings while overseas). If your office does not have updated equipment like webcams installed, you can use apps/software like GoTo Meeting and Skype to conduct meetings.
Want to impress your boss? Include a plan for every meeting in your proposal. This shows them how serious you are about doing your job while you're gone.
Step 4: Communication is Key
Clear communication is non-negotiable for remote work. In your office, your boss can stop by your desk or pop into your office to ask a quick question. Your coworker can stop you in passing to ask about a project deadline. There's also the traditional last-minute meeting you're told you'll have to attend thirty minutes before it is scheduled to begin. You won't have these luxuries while working abroad.
Your boss will want to know that you can be contacted at any time during your assigned work schedule even though you're not physically in the office. Be sure to explain how you plan to communicate with staff in your proposal. Fortunately, technology is so advanced that there isn't a limit to what you can do from wherever you are.
Step 5: Be Transparent About Footing the Bill
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Understanding that your employer is probably not going to pay for your flight, housing, and other expenses that come along with your new remote work lifestyle will help you stay focused on your ultimate goal. The only thing you should expect your employer to pay for is your paycheck.
If you cannot afford to pay for everything, you may want to abort the mission until you're able to save enough money to do so. Remember, you want your boss to take your proposal seriously. Expecting them to pay for the whole experience could make it easier for them to deny your proposal. Letting your boss know upfront that you will be paying for everything lets them know how committed you are to working remotely.
Step 6: Let Them Know What's in It for Them
Companies will want to know how they can benefit from you working remotely. As an employee, you will never get anywhere if you only pitch personal benefits to your boss.
Focus less on personal benefits and more on benefits from the company's perspective in your proposal. What can you promise them? Leave no stone unturned. Look at your company's mission statement closely.
For example, something as simple as wearing your company's T-shirt while volunteering abroad could be the marketing strategy that gets your proposal approved – especially if your company is big on making a social impact.
Step 7: Wait for the Perfect Time to Pitch
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I'm not a fan of baseball but I know it's easy to strike out if you don't wait for the perfect pitch. Not sure how one can easily equate the importance of a great pitch in baseball to pitching a proposal to your boss but it's there...somewhere.
The pitch is almost as important as the proposal. Have you double-checked your proposal to make sure you have your plan for communication, work schedule, and expenses included? If your proposal is complete, it's time to pitch your proposal. Be prepared to answer any questions your boss or senior management may have.
Include a letter of intent with your proposal that briefly summarizes why you are interested in working remotely and what you hope to gain professionally. Instead of emailing the proposal to your boss, print out a copy and hand it to them personally.
Whether you work remotely for a week, three months, or an entire year, the benefits are all-encompassing. The experience itself can be life-changing.
Hopefully, you now feel encouraged and inspired to begin writing a proposal of your own to work abroad. Taking the leap to talk to your boss about working remotely can also be very challenging – especially if your company has never approved anyone working remotely before. Though you will serve as a guinea pig for the company, you are not alone!
Thousands of young professionals have dreamed of leaving their office space for new experiences, but they are also nervous about pitching the idea of working remotely to their bosses. Employers know the 21st century workplace is slowly evolving and making small changes to allow young employees to develop professionally through nontraditional work-life experiences.
They also know they'll need to evolve to remain competitive and keep young professionals engaged. Remember, you are the star employee. You have more power than you think you have when it comes to your employer. Now, what are you waiting for?Write the proposal and go for it!
Need help getting started? Click here to download my free Remote Work Proposal Resource Guide.
*This article was originally published on BucketlistMemoirs.com and has been shortened for clarity.
Featured image by Getty Images.
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'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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Bored With Your Partner's Body? 10 Tips To Breathe New Life Into Your Bedroom.
Recently, while checking out a movie, a wife said that she and her husband were trying to come up with creative things to do in the bedroom because, it wasn’t so much that their sex life had become boring, but “it is stale and repetitive” (which gee, sure does sound like a definition of boring to me — LOL). It’s not the first time I’ve heard that because some of my own clients in real life bring that very issue up from time to time.
What’s interesting about boredom, though, is a variety of things can be the root cause of it: a lack of interest, no sense of purpose, stress or anxiety or having a short attention span are some of the popular reasons. And that’s why, whenever a couple presents boredom to me, especially sexual boredom, I encourage them to figure out what they mean when they use the word. Knowing that can help to point them in the direction of what they need to do next (seeing a sex therapist might be the way to go — check out “Have You Ever Wondered If You Should See A Sex Therapist?”).
Today? Today we’re gonna address another definition of boring: “monotonous or repetitive activities.” What should you do when, what you find to be boring is your partner’s body? It’s not because you don’t love them anymore or even that you don’t still enjoy intimacy with them — it’s just that you are in an exclusive (if you’re dating) or monogamous (if you’re married — check out “Why I Use The Word 'Monogamous' In Marriage And 'Exclusive' In Dating”) dynamic, what do you do when you kind of feel like the visuals are hella predictable which can make intimacy a bit…well, drab?
Listen, just because folks may not talk about it openly, that doesn’t mean that this isn’t a real issue. If it’s something that you’re currently experiencing right now — don’t feel bad or guilty. Sex has seasons just like almost everything in life. The key is to handle this season responsibly. These 10 tips are designed to help you to do that…so that you can get the excitement (of your partner’s body) back into your bedroom again.
1. Dress Up for Dates
Give pushback if you want to, yet it’s my personal opinion that the pandemic still has a chokehold on a lot of us when it comes to fashion — or the lack thereof. It’s like lockdown had us used to being in PJs and joggers for so long that far too many people are still struggling to actually dress up. That’s a shame too because if you wanna see our people show up and all the way out, put a woman in a little black dress and a man in a tailored suit. WHEW.
And just what does that have to do with today’s topic? Well, think about gifts that you’ve received in the past. What made them more appealing? When someone just handed them to you out of a shopping bag or when they made the time to “dress them up” in some fancy wrapping paper or a gift bag and some pretty tissue paper? Our bodies are similar because, well, just think about it — no matter how often you’ve seen your man with no clothes on, when he’s all dressed up, doesn’t he turn into a level of fine that makes him super sexy and hella appealing again?
That’s why my first tip would be for the two of you to not just go out on dates more than you currently are but to DRESS UP for them too. Seeing how good he looks in his clothes in public can motivate you to want to take them off in private.
2. Schedule a Professional Photoshoot and Post Them in Your Bedroom
Since a fair amount of my friends are entertainment industry folks, they are good for taking professional pictures. No, I don’t mean asking someone to use their phone to capture them while they are on stage. I mean that they schedule a photoshoot with a reputable photographer — and you know what? As much as I see some of these people, I continue to be awed by what photographers can bring out of them…hell, just with the lighting alone.
The same thing can happen for how you see your man. Yep, book a photoshoot — one that consists of consulting with the photographer about what your partner would look best in. Once the shoot is done, go through the pictures, select 1-4 of your faves, blow them up a bit, and then mount or frame them in your bedroom. Walking into the space where you probably have the most sex and seeing him at his best is the type of visual turn-on that is absolutely underrated.
3. Go “All Out Sexy” in the Bedroom
Sometimes the truth hurts and if you and your partner have been going to bed looking like who-shot-what, chances are, you’re not bored, what you are is low-key irritated — and you absolutely should be. The reality is most of us spend at least 6-8 hours a night in bed and if someone is in there with us, we should stop acting like they don’t want something appealing to look at. So, this coming weekend, y’all should make some time to hop online and select some attractively seductive sleepwear. It doesn’t always have to be a lace teddy for you or expensive silk boxers for him but damn, at least a really cute tank and booty shorts for you and some boxer briefs that are in your favorite color for him. Sex or not…tease each other a lil’ bit. Visually.
4. Play Around with Lighting
Personally, I find myself doing more online shopping and then altering whatever doesn’t fit the way that I like. A part of the reason why I prefer going this route is because the lighting that’s in a lot of stores? Oh, how they suck. Yeah, lighting can really alter our perception of so many things — which is why changing your lighting also makes the list of what you can do if you are in a season of being bored with your partner’s body. See how he looks under candlelight. See how he looks as a “red light special” (shout-out to TLC’s song and visual and how well actor Boris Kodjoe is aging — the real ones know).
LED lights that sync up to music? Those are bomb as well. I’m telling you, I don’t care how much of a “rerun” it might be, a Black man in some cool blue or warm gold lighting is sexy, sexy, sexy…and then some.
5. Use Blindfolds (More Often)
When you get a chance, check out “How To Incorporate All Five Senses To Have The Best Sex Ever.” Then afterwards, pick up a couple of (more) blindfolds. Part of the reason why blindfolds are such a staple for foreplay (especially) is because, when one of your five senses — sight, touch, hearing, taste, and sound — is subdued, that ends up amplifying the other four that remain (more on that in a bit). And chile, when you’re blindfolded during sex, not only does it increase anticipation about whatever is coming your way, but it can also help your imagination to run wild — and that can be quite the aphrodisiac.
6. Give Erotic Massages
When it comes to sex, specifically, something that I appreciate about the art of the massage is it encourages people to focus on not-so-common parts of the body (a common one? Check out “Blow Your Man's Mind By Giving Him This Tantalizing Massage”). For instance, sensual massages are all about slowing down and using your hands to not only focus on one part/area of someone else’s body but to do some exploring too.
And even though the main purpose of an erotic massage is to touch the parts of your partner that will turn them on, it’s still a massage that is all about touching lightly, using body parts other than your hands, and exploring new ways to turn your partner on. Since giving a massage is a way to encourage you to exercise a bit of restraint, that can “build you up” to have the desire to indulge in your partner’s body more — whether you’ve experienced it dozens of times before or not.
7. Explore Other Erogenous Zones
“If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” isn’t exactly a motto that I would recommend for the bedroom. The main reason why is because, if you’re not careful, it can cause you to become pretty lazy on the sexual tip — and that is never good. That being said if you’re at the point where you’re feeling a bit bored with your partner’s body, this (probably) means that you both have learned “which buttons to push” when it comes to sexually pleasing one another.
And that means it’s time to explore some new territory. If you already know their favorite erogenous zones, determine in your mind to learn some different ones — some “uncharted territory,” if you will. Healthline once published an article that said there are a little over 30 different ones out here. Can you honestly say that you’ve tested each and every one of those out? C’mon now.
8. Focus on Your Other Four Senses
Looking at your partner’s body only covers one of the five senses: sight. Okay, but what efforts are you putting into hearing, touching, tasting, and smelling? For hearing, how’s y’all’s dirty talk game been lately? Touch? Bring in different sex toys and fabrics to see what can cultivate new sensations. Tasting? Well, read “12 'Sex Condiments' That Can Make Coitus Even More...Delicious” and then try something new.
Smell? Scents that have been proven to be sexually arousing include jasmine, vanilla, rose, sandalwood, patchouli, cinnamon, and a blend of pumpkin and lavender (especially if they’re placed in erogenous-zoned spots). Honing in on the other senses can make you appreciate sight more. Try it. I think that you will like it.
9. Think of Their “Best” Body Part. Have Sex in That Position.
No matter how often you’ve seen his body before, I’m willing to bet that you’ve got a favorite part. Think about it and then figure out which sex position will give you the best view of it. If it’s his chest, get on top. If it’s his legs, fellatio counts as sex because oral sex is sex. If it’s his torso, have him penetrate you while he’s standing up. I could expound yet y’all get my drift.
And if I didn’t mention your favorite part, check out SheKnows’s “69 Sex Positions to Put on Your Bucket List Immediately” to get some inspiration — because how can you not see his body as eye candy when you’re looking at the part of it you like the most as you’re receiving all kinds of pleasure. Whew.
10. Record a Session (or Two)
Ever made a sex tape before? Although I will be the first to say that you need to exercise extreme discretion when it comes to this tip — if you’ve been having sex with someone long enough to experience bouts of boredom with their body, I’m assuming that you’ve built up some trust over time (right?). Anyway, something that’s sexy about a sex tape is it can help you to see you and your partner from another angle/perspective — and that also can be pretty damn appealing. So, if it’s something that the two of you have never tried…try it. Looking at the two of you enjoying each other can give you a greater appreciation for his body — and what it has the ability to do to you.
BONUS: Ask Yourself If You’re “Bored” or “Not Attracted”
It’s kind of a full-circle moment with this one because, as I bring this to a close, I’ve got to put on record that it really is one thing to be bored — another entirely to not be attracted. Case in point — when it comes to one of my exes, the sex itself was actually pretty good. Still, I had to kind of “force myself” sometimes through it because I wasn’t very attracted to him…not ever really (you’d be amazed how much that can happen when you like the person’s personality and not so much their looks).
Although I will NEVER put myself in that position again, sometimes people are so invested in their relationship that they don’t just want to end it due to this alone. If that is what you are going through, please speak with a therapist/counselor/life coach. Depending on how deep the issues go, they may be able to provide you with some tips and tools to make things easier.
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One thing about boredom is that creativity can totally help it out. And what this means is a part of what creates boredom is laziness (ouch) or a lack of intention. And what this means is if you’re willing to do something about the current state of boredom that you are going through, there is a big chance that you can get rid of it. No matter what the cause of it may be.
Try the steps. Report back. Something tells me that you might feel better about things in your bedroom.
Just a hunch.
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