
Why Estate Planning Is The Secret To Building Generational Wealth In Our Community

For Blacks in America, even more important than creating wealth is passing that wealth down to the next generation. According to a study by Prosperity Now and the Institute For Policy Studies, the estimated median wealth for Blacks in America will fall to $0 by 2053. Researchers concluded, "As long as a substantial racial wealth gap persists, White households will continue to enjoy greater advantages than their Black and Latino neighbors in meeting the financial challenges of everyday life and will be able to make greater investments in their children, passing economic advantages on."
Confronting the wealth gap and the associated public policies that help fuel it will be one of the biggest challenges of our current generation.
Lawyer Art Steele is trying to change this narrative. As the host of the InkSecure Podcast, she educates entrepreneurs about the legal aspects of their business and how to use the law to grow their business. As a Trusts and Estates attorney, she's also a fierce estate planning advocate with a mission to educate as many minorities about the necessity of proper long-term estate planning. "It's not sexy [and] so easy for people to ignore. When it becomes relevant, it's way too late," says Art. "Personal behavior does not close the wealth gap. We can make as much money as we want. We can be our own bosses. We can build these million-dollar entrepreneurial businesses as much as we want. Yes, it's important that we create wealth, but we need to pass it down and pass it down the correct way. If we don't, every single generation is starting from scratch," states Art.
Avoiding the financial vacuums that are created when someone dies and providing financial gifts for the future, is the key to building wealth in our communities. xoNecole spoke to Art about the benefits of estate planning and some of the key things to keep in mind when beginning the estate planning process.
1. The ability to pass down wealth efficiently.
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Instead of leaving it up to the probate process, estate planning allows you to set up how your wealth is passed down and in a cost-effective and timely manner. Oftentimes, death is unexpected and can leave families with immediate financial obligations. If one's estate is not properly set up, getting access to funds can be a long, drawn-out and costly process. "When you create an estate plan and keep your estate out of probate, you save money. More money goes to your heirs," recommends Art.
While having a will can be useful, setting up a trust is the next step in ensuring what you leave behind gets disposed of in a timely manner. "If you only have a will and not a trust, your entire estate goes through the probate (legal process)," warns Art. To expedite the process, "you should create a will (to be filed in court), but dispose of all your property through a trust. This method avoids probate because the trust agreement is a private contract between you and the trustee (someone you've named). You can get as detailed as possible," explains Art. The value of setting up a trust is the trustee's ability to start working immediately to take care of your family, carry out your wishes and dispose of your assets without having to wait on the court system.
In order to truly build generational wealth, Art recommends thinking beyond lump-sum payouts, where money and assets can be squandered quickly. "When creating an estate plan, think about two to three generations down the line. For example, you may give your children access to a trust fund for life (in the form of monetary distributions) and when they die, the trust funds pass on to the next generation." Though trusts cannot be passed on for an eternity, ensuring there is something left to give to the next generation is more powerful than not having anything passed down at all.
Another key thing to keep in mind is investing in life insurance--especially if you don't have physical assets or money to leave behind. It's important to list beneficiaries even if you don't have a dependent, and it is usually cheaper the younger you are. "Life insurance helps keep things at status quo. No one has to pay for your funeral. You can leave money behind to a niece, brother, or partner, etc." says Art.
2. The ability to have your affairs handled more cost-effectively.
Estate planning also involves creating a plan and designating someone to handle your affairs in the event you become incapacitated, which is done in the form of a power of attorney. "This immediately gives someone access to all of your financials and ability to take money out of your bank account. Your Power of Attorney (POA) can also sign contracts, real estate documents, enter into business contracts, or talk to the IRS on your behalf," explains Art. Your POA can legally tend to immediate financial concerns such as paying your rent, mortgage, or child care should you become incompacitated or die.
If you don't have a power of attorney, loved ones will have to "hire a lawyer, go to court, get a bond and have the court appoint [someone] as the custodian or conservator of your money," warns Art. The process is very expensive and usually prohibitive for most families because it requires hiring a lawyer on an emergency basis because of the urgent needs. Investing in hiring a lawyer to draft a state-recognized Power of Attorney document is worthwhile. Many banks and some states have their own power of attorney documents available for free.
Having an advanced medical directive is also extremely important and allows individuals to designate someone to make medical decisions on their behalf in case they become incapacitated. Advanced medical directives should "have instructions on what should be done to your body, access to medical records, and contain a HIPPA release," says Art. Oftentimes important medical decisions need to be made in traumatic circumstances. Taking the time to think about who you entrust to make important medical decisions on your behalf could be a life or death matter. Why leave it up to chance?
3. The ability to make your final wishes clear.
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Estate planning protects against speculation and disputes concerning the unknown that can usually follow death or incapacitation. It allows you to avoid confusion and answer questions in advance for heirs such as "How, when, and where will my property and assets be disposed? Who will take care of my children?"
Take celebrities Nipsey Hussle and Prince as examples - both prolific musicians who died without a will at different stages of their career. Nipsey's $2 million estate is currently being petitioned to be administered by his older brother Samiel Asghedom. Three years after Prince's death, his estate, valued between $200-300 million, is still unsettled.
Estate planning is also critical for business owners. "If you have a business that has inventory, what happens to that? Who gets it? Does the business continue on [if you die]? Who has the authority to continue on? Can they sell the business? Who do you want to manage the business?" An estate attorney will work with you to legally set up the answers to these questions to ensure your business doesn't die as well.
4. The ability to protect who manages your intellectual property.
Being that we live in a digital world, we all have some form of intellectual property, which Art describes as "property that can produce income long after you're gone." Who is going to manage that income? Where does that income go? Who manages the property so that it actually continues to produce income? Art recognizes, "A lot of entrepreneurs are developing intellectual property through e-books, online courses, blogs. What happens to your creations?" For instance, for musicians especially, leaving behind clear instructions on how one's masters, image and likeness and trademarks can be used is important for protecting one's artistic legacy.
Towards the end of our chat, Art confesses that estate planning can often be a "tough thing to spend money on" because the person setting up their estate plan doesn't receive an immediate benefit. However, "it's the only step we can take to close the generational wealth gap," she urges readers. "Even if you do not have children, you should leave something behind. We should look at estate planning as a way to create wealth for our community."
No one wants to think about their ultimate demise, but making sure the next generation of Blacks in America are set up for success by our ability to pass wealth down is one the most urgent duties of our time. Stop waiting. Start now.
To learn more about getting started on planning your estate and get a FREE copy of Art's estate planning worksheets, click here.
Be sure to follow Art on Instagram @artsteele_esq for more estate planning tips.
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Laterras R. Whitfield On What He Wants In A 'Future Wifey' & Redefining Masculinity
In this week's episode of the xoMAN podcast, host Kiara Walker chopped it up with Laterras R. Whitfield, host of the Dear Future Wifey podcast, for a raw and revealing conversation about personal growth, faith, and the search for love in a way that resonates.
Laterras Whitfield Believes Men Should Pursue, Not Persuade
“Let me know you exist, and I’ll do the rest”
Whitfield is a big advocate of a man’s role in going confidently for the woman he wants. “Men should pursue, not persuade, and women should present, not pursue,” he said. He’s open to meeting women on social media but isn’t a fan of bold approaches. “Don’t shoot your shot at me. … Let me know you exist, and I’ll do the rest.”
His ideal woman?
“She has to be a woman of God… I judge a woman by how her friends see her… and most importantly, how she treats my kids.”
Infidelity, Redemption, and the Power of Self-Control
“Being disciplined is the most beautiful thing you can offer”
Once unfaithful in his previous marriage, Whitfield has since transformed his perspective on masculinity. “Being disciplined is the most beautiful thing you can offer. That’s what true masculinity is to me now.” He has also committed to abstinence, choosing self-control as a defining trait of manhood.
Whitfield’s journey is one of redemption, purpose, and faith—something that speaks to women who value emotional intelligence, accountability, and the power of transformation.
Rewriting the Narrative Around Black Masculinity
What masculinity, legacy, and healing mean to Whitfield today
“My dad taught me what not to be [as a man] and my mom taught me what she needed [in a man],” Whitfield said. While his father wasn’t abusive, he wasn’t emotionally or affectionately present. “Since I didn’t see it, I never got it either… I would look at my dad and say, ‘I want to be a better father.’ ”
Adoption had always been on his spirit, influenced by TV shows like Different Strokes and Punky Brewster. This mindset led him to take in his nephew as his son after a powerful dream confirmed what he already felt in his heart.
Want more real talk from xoMAN? Catch the full audio episodes every Tuesday on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and don’t miss the full video drops every Wednesday on YouTube. Hit follow, subscribe, and stay tapped in.
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If there is a piece of consistent sex-related advice that I give people who are considering going the distance in their relationship, it’s this: “Don’t go for someone who is simply good in bed; you’d be far better off choosing someone who actually enjoys sex.” Why do I say that? Because I’ve been doing this couples-work thing long enough to know that there are a lot — and, I mean A LOT — of people who like to manipulate or weaponize sex in order to get something that they want…and then, once they get it, suddenly sex is not a priority anymore.
One day, I might really get into just how actually evil that is (because sex is never supposed to be a bribe in a relationship). For now, though, I want to talk about how motives reveal oh so very much when it comes to physical (and even emotional) intimacy. Hmph. It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes on the topic of motives: “People’s behavior makes sense when you think about it in terms of goals, needs, and motives.” An author by the name of Thomas Mann said that, and indeed it does because, when you are doing something merely to get your way, that is a form of manipulation or control.
On the other hand, when you’re doing it merely for the holistic pleasure of doing so — that is when you are experiencing intimacy in the way that it was intended to be.
So, when it comes to your personal motive for sex, what is it really all about?
What Are You Really Hoping to Get Out of Sex?
When It Comes to Your ‘What’, You Always Need to Know Your WHY
Oh, I’ve got some more motives quotes for you. Psychologist Albert Ellis once said, “People have motives and thoughts of which they are unaware.” Author Paul David Trip once said, “We rarely do anything with one single motive.” It’s pretty ironic that actor Chris Noth (because if you know, you know) once said, “Since women ask me about male motives all the time, I can offer a bit of advice. If you feel like you're going to get hurt, then you shouldn't be there in the first place. That's the way I look at relationships.”
Now, before I attempt to build on these quotes, let’s first look at a very basic definition of motive:
Motive: a reason for doing something, especially one that is hidden or not obvious
Did you catch that? Oftentimes, when someone is moving based on a motive, the reason is hidden. Is it just me or does that sound semi-sneaky or opportunistic, right off the bat? Interestingly enough, some synonyms for motive include grounds, basis and root. All of those words make me think of the foundation of something. So, since we are talking about sex, specifically, today — before you decide to sleep with someone, you really should ask yourself what your foundational reason is and, if you’re choosing not to share it with said-partner…why is that?
Pick Your Top 3 Motives, Then Reflect
Let’s keep going. Some other synonyms for motive include aim; emotion; idea; impulse; intent; motivation; passion; rationale; occasion; incentive; consideration, and inspiration. Aight, so here’s another thing to ponder — out of these 12 words, select your top three that “connect the dots” as it relates to your motive (or motives). It could be that you feel passion for him, your intent is to show him that and, since you’ve been dating for a hot minute, you think that it’s the right occasion. In this case, what’s shady or opportunistic about that?
If that is indeed your motive, it would fall less into the “hidden” category and more in the “not obvious” once you really thought it through. On the other hand, if it’s more like you aim to have sex, because your rationale is to get some sort of incentive out of it — do you see how that’s totally different? And if indeed that is the case, WHY do you think that is okay?
Sex Is Not A Transaction — It’s An Exchange
I’m telling you, if there is one thing that I damn near loathe is how transactional sex sounds these days: “Unless you’re going to pay my bills, I’m not going to give you any.” What in the world? Listen, I don’t care how unpopular the opinion may be, sometimes — hell, oftentimes — the truth isn’t popular and the truth about copulation is IT IS AN EVEN EXCHANGE. No one should be paying you for it. He got pleasure, you got pleasure. Over and out. And if that isn’t happening, either there is more communication that needs to be going on (which is just one of the reasons why I’m not a fan of faking orgasms) or there is something “off” when it comes to you and your partner.
Whatever the case may be, before engaging in physical intimacy with someone, it’s beyond wise to spend some time getting really honest with yourself about what your motives truly are — because how we start something oftentimes sets the tone for the experience overall. Indeed, motives are a lot like cause and effect — they play a significantly profound role in determining the outcome of matters.
Real Compatibility Includes Mutual Motives
Sexual Compatibility Includes Having Mutual Motives
Okay, so now that we’ve discussed motives, in general — say that your motives are pure (and you are being really honest with yourself about that). You’re not hiding anything because there is nothing to hide. You simply feel so connected to someone that you are motivated and inspired to take things to another level.
Well, that’s where author Lebo Grand and something that he once said comes in: “Sensuality is the purest motive that exists on earth.” When something is sensual, it gratifies the senses. When something is sensual, it arouses the appetite — and yes, when you want to be intimate with someone, simply because you want to get closer to them, there is something that is very sweet, very sincere and even pure — in the sense of being authentic and real — about that.
If that is your motive, share that with your partner. If that is also his motive, then it’s time to get into what the mutual motives of what a healthy sexual relationship should be: pleasure, joy and satisfaction. Y’all, something else that messes many couples up is there is so much focus on what they want to get out of sex that they fail to fully tune in and tap into their partner — and that is unfortunate. You know why? Because it has been both my experience as well as my observation that when both people are totally invested in making sure that their partner is sexually satisfied both individuals end up feeling gratified and quenched. Yeah, a selfish motive rarely brings contentment like a selfless one does — and you can take that to the bank!
And that is why, although I think that sexual compatibility is important, you’d be amazed how much clear communication, patience and selflessness can “get you there” if sex seems awkward at first. Again, if the motives are right, goodness can come from it, even if it takes a bit of time and effort to get there.
When Your Sexual Motives Shift, Say Something
If Your Motives Shift, You Need to Speak Up
Final point. It is the Greek philosopher Heraclitus who once said, “Change is the only constant in life” and this applies to every aspect of it — including sex. That said, some of you may recall back when I wrote an article entitled, “BDE: Please Let The 'It Needs To Be Huge' Myth Go.” The wife who I featured in that piece, we were recently talking about it and how she remains 10 toes down about the fact that a “big one” ain’t all it’s cracked up to be if the man who owns it is attached to a huge ego and not much else.
When I asked her to reflect on how much of her dissatisfaction was — and kinda still is — about him vs. who she now is as a person, she admitted that so much of who she is has changed from when they first got together. She’s older and so her hormones have shifted. She has spiritually evolved and so a profound emotional connection is more desired. She knows herself better and so she has some sexual needs that she never had before. And so, her motives have shifted from pretty much just having a good time (only) to longing for something…deeper.
This isn’t abnormal; many people go through this. Thing is, instead of being forthcoming with their partner, they would rather have them pick up on hints or, even worse, attempt to read their mind. Yeah, that’s not how effective communication works, y’all — if your motives for sex have changed, you’ve got to say something. Otherwise, you’re going to end up frustrated or unfulfilled…and honestly, your partner probably will too because if you are different and you don’t share it, eventually there will be a “disconnect” (and not just in the bedroom).
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As I bring this to a close, take a moment to circle back to the first motive quote that I shared in the intro (“People’s behavior makes sense when you think about it in terms of goals, needs and motives.”). Whatever your sex life is like right now, what are your goals, needs and motives? What are his?
Figure that out and you’ll better understand where you’re at and, if you don’t like it, how to get to where you want to be.
It all begins with the right motives, sis. It really and truly does.
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