I already know. Some of y'all are like, "I know that drinking water is good for me. That doesn't mean I like it, so trying to convince me that I'm doing it wrong is asking for a lot." Sis, I hear you. It's not like drinking water is my favorite thing to do either. So much, in fact, that I oftentimes go with sparkling water with a splash of juice in it, just to get my daily quota in. Still, personal feelings don't change the fact that water consumption is oh so very necessary if you want to keep toxins out of your system, regulate your body temperature, keep your joints lubricated, produce saliva and lubrication, push oxygen throughout your organs, keep your skin healthy and so much more.
That's why it's not only important that you drink water but that you do it right. If you had absolutely no idea that there are a myriad of different ways to do it wrong, let me share 10 of 'em, along with how to correct these common mistakes—now.
1. Stop Drinking Bottled Water
Let's start with something that I'm thinking is a given, at this point (although I see A LOT of people do it so, maybe not). Bottled water—what I mean is water that comes from a plastic bottle—needs to be an absolute no-no. Aside from the fact that it is absolutely horrible for the environment (it's been reported that there will be somewhere around 30 million metric tons of plastic in the oceans, every year, by 2040), plastic oftentimes contains BPA (which is a synthetic compound known as bisphenol A) and other plastic toxins.
This can ultimately lead to all sorts of health-related issues including fertility problems, weight gain and even heart disease. Instead, you're much better off using a recyclable bottle. It lasts longer, there's no trash and it's so much better for your overall health and well-being.
2. Drink Less Cold Water
While I can certainly get down with the fact that drinking cold water can be really refreshing, when it's ice-cold, it actually isn't all that great for you in the long run. For one thing, if you heard somewhere that it boosts your metabolism, drinking cold water doesn't really do that any more than room temperature water does. Also, because it can restrict your blood vessels, cold water can make it harder to digest your food easily. Other challenges that it presents? It can decrease your heart rate, hinder your body from breaking down fat and even leave you constipated.
So yeah, water with a ton of ice in it isn't really the way to go. Room temperature water is your far better bet.
3. Leave the Lemon Slices Alone (When Eating Out)
If you're someone who's good for getting a couple of lemon slices in your water while you're out—yeah, you might wanna chill on that. There are many studies which indicate that as much as 70 percent of lemon slices have all kinds of nasty germs including bacteria, viruses and E. coli all over them. What about lemon slices at your crib? Well, that's an entirely different story.
If you drink it there, lemon water can help to detox your system, give you a boost of Vitamin C, freshen your breath, reduce your chances of getting kidney stones and even aid in your body's digestive process (especially if you have a glass, first thing in the morning). The reason why DIY lemon wedges are better is because you know what's going on with your knives, countertops and kitchens (and your hands). In restaurants? Not so much.
4. Use a Straw
If water isn't really one of your favorite things on the planet (again, I get it; I oftentimes say it's like drinking wet air) yet you want to amp up your water intake, try drinking it from a straw. Believe it or not, drinking liquid from a straw makes it easier to consume more of it. Hmph. Maybe that's why so many fast food joints want us to take as many straws as possible for those sodas, huh?
5. Have Some Water with Your Alcohol and Coffee
Two things that are diuretics are alcohol and coffee. This is why a lot of people can drink either (or both) and end up still being thirsty all of the time. If you check out the article, "10 Overlooked Signs That You're Dehydrated" on our site, you'll see several reasons why being dehydrated (75 percent of us are, by the way) is absolutely not a good look.
Yet what if you can't imagine a day without a glass of red wine or a couple of cups of java? At least balance things out a bit by following those with a glass of water. It can help to keep you hydrated. It can also reduce your chances of drinking more alcohol or coffee than you actually should.
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6. Drink a Full Glass with Your Vitamins or Medicine
Whether it's some sort of medicine that you've been prescribed or you're like me and you are all about getting some vitamins and supplements into your system on a daily basis, chase those down with a full glass of water. If you're concerned that doing this will flush out what you just took in, first, one glass shouldn't be able to rock any kind of boat. And, as far as vitamins and supplements are concerned, many of them are water-soluble which means that the water can actually help them to dissolve into your system easier/quicker.
7. Avoid Artificial Flavorings. Add Fruit Instead.
OK, so back to the wet air thing. There are plenty of products on the market that claim to make drinking water easier because they will add flavor to it. Uh-huh. What they don't tell you in the ads is all of the artificial flavors, colors and other chemicals that are in them too.
Water is supposed to free you of toxins, so it makes absolutely no sense to intentionally put things into it that will work against instead of for you. Your better bet would be to make some of your own infused water. Whatever fruits, veggies or herbs that you decide to go with will help to add nutrients to your water without all of the added fake drama.
8. Have a Couple of Glasses When You’re Tired
Question. What's the first food or drink that you reach for, whenever you are feeling completely worn out? If it's not water, chile, it should be. The truth is a sign of being dehydrated if feeling like your energy level is zapped. So, when you combat that with a glass or two of water, it can increase your brain functionality by as much as 14 percent. Since your brain is made up of around 80 percent water, that actually makes a lot of sense.
9. Know the Signs of When You’re Water Deprived
You might've heard somewhere before that if you wait until you're thirsty to drink water, you're already mildly dehydrated. And yes, there is a lot of truth in that. That's why it's smart to drink water throughout the day.
Just in case you're wondering what some not-so-obvious signs of water deprivation are, they include headaches, joint pain, dry skin, cravings for salty foods, stomach pain, dark urine and not urinating between 6-8 times a day (up to 10 if you're drinking water around the clock).
10. Drink Water at in the Morning Instead of at Night
To be honest with you, there isn't really a "bad" time of the day to drink water. However, if you've gotta choose, taking in 2-4 glasses, first thing in the morning is really wise. For one thing, waiting until nighttime could cause you to have to keep getting up and going to the bathroom. Also, consuming more in the morning is one of the best ways to kick your metabolism into high gear.
The reason why is because, when you're asleep, your metabolism slows down. So, when you drink water, it helps to get your metabolic processes going while aiding in burning fat in the process. Having some water in the morning is refreshing on some many levels. Tomorrow morning, why not give it a shot?
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Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
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Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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Since the focus today is on hyperpigmentation, let me break that down a bit further. Basically, what gives your skin pigment is melanin. Well, when your skin cells end up getting damaged or injured, oftentimes your body’s response is to create more melanin as a part of the healing process. Problem is, sometimes your system overproduces melanin, and that can lead to darker patches of skin. This can especially be the case for our skin since we naturally produce more melanin anyway.
When hyperpigmentation transpires, we usually want to get rid of it as soon as possible. And while doing things like applying sunscreen, using skin lightening products, and even taking certain vitamins can help — the main thing to do is incorporate a gentle skincare regimen and then use patience with it. If you don’t and you go overboard in your approach, you could look up and end up with hyperpigmentation issues that are far worse (and longer lasting) than they were to begin with.
How? I’ll explain.
Using Products That Create Breakouts
GiphyWho likes getting a pimple? For me, though, what pisses me off to no end is that there is about a 70 percent chance that if one pops up, some sort of hyperpigmentation is going to be left behind whether I mess with it or not. Ugh. The reason why is because zits bring inflammation and inflammation can trigger hyperpigmentation.
So, you know what that means, right? It’s important to do all that you can to avoid getting a pimple in the first place and that includes not using products that will clog up your pores or irritate your skin like lanolin, thick butters (especially on your face), mineral oil, D&C coloring, a fatty acid called isopropyl palmitate — these are a few things that can lead to breakouts, if you’re not careful. That’s why it’s always a good idea to read the labels of the things before purchasing them.
Oh, and when it comes to things like shea and mango butter, it’s usually best to use them on other parts of your body than your face (because your face is more fragile than, say, your arms or legs).
Doing Too Much Exfoliating
GiphyI am a fan of DIY chemical peels; so much so that I wrote an entire article about it a couple of years ago (check out “I've Been Doing At-Home Chemical Peels. Here Are The Pros And Cons.”). The things that I like most about them are they are a super-effective way to exfoliate and even out my skin tone. That said, though, be careful with doing too much exfoliating whether it’s via a chemical peel, a skin scrub or even dry brushing.
Not only can over-exfoliating irritate your skin, it can dry it out, cause lots of skin flakes, lead to inflamed skin — and all of this can result in hyperpigmentation as your skin is in the process of “getting back to normal.” So, just how often should you exfoliate? Unless your skin is really oily, 1-2 times a week is more than enough (2-3 if it is on the oily side).
Layering with Too Many Products
GiphyOh, I know — if you watch too many of those TikTok and Instagram videos where women are applying 6-10 products on their face before adding any make-up to it, it can tempt you to follow suit. Use some caution with that, though. Each skincare product comes with its own list of ingredients and every time you add something else that has another set of ingredients onto it, that increases the chances of you irritating your skin or causing it to break out.
My two cents would be to ease into each product. Start with one thing and, if it’s all good (after about a week or so), incorporate another. Oh, and try to keep it down to 3-5 skincare products tops. When it comes to effective skin routines “less is more” is a motto to live by. Otherwise, redness, flaking and hyperpigmentation may be in your future.
Using Skincare Products That Contain Fragrance
GiphyAlthough applying skincare products that have a nice scent to them can cause your skin to smell amazing, sometimes they can be both an irritant as well as an allergen — and that can cause your skin’s barrier to weaken or become really irritated. And again, whenever your skin is damaged in some way, the recovery process can lead to hyperpigmentation. So, it really is best to avoid scented skin products at all costs (if you want flawless skin, that is).
Applying Too Much Heat
GiphyBet you didn’t see this one coming. How about increased blood flow, over time, can lead to hyperpigmentation. Basically, it’s because of the fact that, sometimes, too much consistent blood flow can result in skin inflammation and, as we already discussed, when the body is healing from inflammation, that can sometimes cause hyperpigmentation to occur.
The takeaway here: use sunscreen when you’re outdoors and try to keep those scorching hot showers to a minimum. Being in warm water for between 7-10 minutes is ideal.
Not Testing Products (Especially Acids) on Your Arm First
GiphySomething that definitely keeps my skin glowing is certain acids: hyaluronic acid, mandelic acid and kojic acid soap (oh and some vitamin C extract too), especially. All of these are pretty good on darker skin tones; however, because we all are different, before applying any acid to your skin, make sure to test it on your arm first (and wait 48 hours, just to be sure that the coast is clear).
Trust me, I know of what I speak because I once tried some pretty potent pineapple extract on my face once and it mildly burned the lower part of my right cheek to the point where it took about four months before everything turned back to normal. Hmph, if I can keep anyone from experiencing that drama, I absolutely will.
7. Experimenting with Harsh Essential Oils
GiphyListen, if you want a zit to go away, damn near overnight, apply some tea tree oil to it. Just make sure that you dilute it with a light carrier oil (like grapeseed, jojoba or rosehip oil) first. Why? Oh, I have learned from very up close and personal experience that certain essential oils can also burn your skin and, as we’ve already discussed, ad nauseum at this point, damaged skin typically results in hyperpigmentation on some level. Yeah, essential oils are a blessing. They are also nothing to play with. Dilute, dilute, DILUTE.
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You know, they say that it can take several weeks, if not many months, for hyperpigmentation to totally fade away. Hmph. To me, that’s even more incentive to do all that you can to avoid it transpiring in the first place — and that includes NOT incorporating counterproductive skincare routines and regimens.
The more you know, sis. For real.
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