I've forever had the theory that broke dick is indisputably some of the best dick you'll have.
It's something like those kiddie rides outside the supermarket, for just a quarter you can have the time of your life for five minutes or so, just enough to get you hooked and putting more of your coin into it. Whole time you don't even realize that you're getting the bare minimum out of this parasitic relationship until you've been depleted of all your effort and energy, left with the short end of the stick.
As pretty as the platter is that broke dick is served upon, you know and I know that good dick isn't synonymous with dick that's good for you.
Broke dick tends to be more trouble than money issues alone can cause. Part of this theory goes to the fact that men who feel that they have little to nothing to offer you otherwise, will overcompensate by putting that thang on you! If this is so, this is a man who thinks very little of himself, lacks a mindset of abundance or at least with the head that needs the mindset most.
Broke dick more often than not is symbolic of a broken, half man and it's high time that Black women absolve ourselves from the role of making men whole – financially and otherwise.
I feel especially obligated to say this in a world that is constantly shaming Black women and Black women alone into feeling so damn guilty about wanting a partner who not only has a pipe dream but the bank account to back it up. Really Black women are shamed for having any type of standard for the men she dates, if it's not the good ol' "ride or die" standard.
But, there's a reason the City Girls are a whole ass mood among all women alike, because they say what we have been afraid to say: In the endearing words of JT and Yung Miami, at this point in the game, "I need a n*gga who gone swipe them Visaaaaas."
The minute we demand a man with money we are gold diggers and whores, meanwhile other cultures won't even allow their daughters to cross a man's threshold if the paper (or livestock) is not sitting right. We are one of the only cultures of women who do not select men based on their ability to care for us financially and trust me, I'm not naive to why this is. The reality is that the world has not been great to our men! They have encountered injustice at every turn and with ideals of masculinity at play, I believe it's far more difficult for the male ego to reup after all that the world has done to stifle them. I get it. I get it. I really f*cking get it.
But, our strong Black grandmothers and great grandmothers were right there, in it with our men and still we rise. Black women have shared the burden, carried the burden, and now it's time for us to lay it at the altar.
I'm tired of being so damn strong, rarely having that type of strength reciprocated in the most minimal ways and never having anything to show for it when it's all said and done. We have paid our dues and it's OK to say aloud that we want a man of abundance. No, not ambition but abundance.
Ambition without abundance is a man without a plan, a man without hope, a man without power. It's a man who is simply going through the motions.
So to be clear I don't just want any man with a Visa. I want a man who knows struggle, but because he has a mindset of wealth and abundance, those struggles will be worn differently. Defeat won't keep him down because it won't even be seen as defeat but a learning experience. And when we are swiping those Visas, it won't be a temporary state of wealth because he had "wealth" long before it materialized.
So put down the excuses, throw up the deuces (people still say that right?), and run towards a man with a bag. Guilt free.
Featured image by Getty Images.
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