I like themes. When it comes to sex specifically, I think it's a way to tap into your creative side and surprise your partner with new approaches to copulating. Well, since spring is officially here and summer is on its way, I figured that this would be a great time to share 15 ways where you can bring this time of year into your boudoir in ways that you may have not ever considered before.
Because, after all, the only thing better than sex is the kind that's got plenty of "Whoa. Where did that come from?" energy added to it.
1. Break Out Your Bikini
I know. Typically, when we talk about sex and the art of seduction, it's lingerie that's mentioned. Yet I was surprised that, when I asked some men to describe to me the look that turns them on, a lot of them said that they really enjoy seeing their partner in swimwear. And you know, when I really sit and think about it, I guess that makes sense because the styles of a lot of swimsuits are really sexy. So, in the spirit of spring and summer (which is when we all get into the pool and ocean the most), why not put on your (or his) favorite bathing suit? He probably won't see it coming, it's definitely on-theme and how could he not enjoy taking in the kinds of sights that only happen around this time of the year?
2. DIY Some Lavender Massage Oil
When folks are out on the beach, what's something that they commonly do? Rub sunscreen on their bodies—or each other—right? If you've got on your swimwear, switch it up a bit and swap out sunscreen for massage oil. Massages are beneficial because they relax you, improve blood circulation, increase flexibility, reduce cortisol (stress) levels and can definitely make you feel closer to your partner.
So, whether he's rubbing some oil all over your sex pressure points (check out "Feelin' On These Pressure Points Will Give You The Best Sex Of Your Life") or you're out to give him a tantric massage (check out "Blow Your Man's Mind By Giving Him This Tantalizing Massage"), you definitely can't go wrong by warming up some DIY massage oil first. Hands down, out of all of the essential oils that can help to put you into a mental state of tranquility, lavender would be it. And since it's also a popular summer flower, I'm pretty sure you can see why I went with giving it a massage-scented shout-out. If you want to go this route, a couple of easy recipes for lavender massage oil is located here and here.
3. Buy Some Cooling Sheets
Personally, I'm someone who likes to go to sleep when my bedroom is really cool. I'll turn down my thermostat and, don't put it past me to turn a portable fan on too. Still, I can't tell you how many times I have awakened in the middle of the night to try and figure out why I'm so hot. A few years back, I did some research and discovered that it's usually because our bodies change temperatures throughout the evening.
A way to combat that? Buy some cooling bedsheets. They're specifically designed to allow cool air to surround your body while wicking away moisture that can cause you to feel overheated. On the sex tip, this can really come in handy because most of us get a little hot 'n bothered (in the best way possible, of course) while we're doing-the-do. Anyway, if cooling sheets is something that you'd like to look into, The Sleep Foundation has a list of some of the best ones that are currently on the market. You can check their list out here.
4. Add Some Greenery
One of my favorite things about my bedroom is the tall fake tree that's in one of its corners. It being there just makes the entire space feel more comfortable. There are local arts and craft stores that sell them for a fair price. Shoot, if you put a couple of those in your bedroom and turn the fan on? You could easily find yourself feeling like you're straight up in the middle of a jungle or forest. It's like having outdoor sex without all of the outdoor drama.
5. DIY a Sex Piñata
Most of us know that piñatas are a Mexican-based tradition where a big container is filled with goodies. Usually, they are made out of something like papier-mâché, people are blindfolded and they try and hit it until something falls out. I don't recall ever seeing a piñata at any indoors party which is why I thought it would be cool to mention for this particular article.
Instead of putting candy inside of a piñata, why not put some sex-themed goodies in it instead? Flavored condoms. Small tubes of lube. Adult dice or sex tokens. Dark chocolate (since it is an aphrodisiac). Edible panties. Anything that is sex-focused that can fit into a piñata and won't hurt once it falls out. Go into your backyard, hang the piñata up, have you and your partner blindfold each other, take turns taking a whack at it and have some sort of sex-related "prize" for the one who is able to break it open.
Now tell me that's not creative and festive AF. Places like Party City, Michael's and the Oriental Trading Company typically carry them.
6. Make Your Own Lemonade Lubricant
Speaking of lubricants, the best thing about them is they make things wetter, right? And since we're talking about spring- and summer-themed sex, is there anything more refreshing that a tall glass of homemade lemonade? Why not merge the two things together by making your own lemonade-flavored lubricant? All you need to do is combine one-fourth cup of aloe vera gel with one-fourth cup of flaxseed gel. Then add 3-5 drops of natural lemon flavoring (which is the oil of the lemon not the juice) and BAM—a natural lubricant! While it's more for external use (oral sex) than intercourse, it can still be a real treat. Try it and report back.
7. Adjust the Lights
When it comes to setting up the overall atmosphere of your bedroom, overhead lighting is too harsh and complete darkness can sometimes impede the ambiance of it all. In walks, colored light bulbs. In honor of all things spring and summer, go with green or blue ones. As far as green goes, it represents nature, freshness, prosperity, fertility and harmony (I've always liked that there is a Scripture in the Bible that simply says "our bed is green"—Song of Solomon 1:16). Plus, did you know that green light helps to reduce migraine discomfort in some people? As far as blue goes, it's the color of water—and calm, serenity, inspiration, peace and trust. Y'all, when two naked bodies are moving around in dim green or blue lighting in the middle of the night? There is something about it that visually takes sexual arousal up a couple of notches—and then some.
8. Incorporate Citrus Scents
Smell is one of our five senses (the others are sight, taste, touch and sound). Whether you decide to go with an oil diffuser, a soy candle, a spray for your bedding or even a plug-in, consider using some citrus scents in your bedroom. Orange and lemon scents are signature spring and summer ones. They're also great because they improve your mood, give you more energy and relieve anxiety. Try 'em.
9. Try Some Strawberry-Flavored Deep Throat Numbing Spray
Speaking of oral sex, if something that you want to get better at is performing fellatio, have you ever heard of throat numbing spray? If you happen to have a sensitive gag reflex, spraying this on your throat can make being a "giver" easier. Although the brand GoodHead™ Deep Throat Spray comes in a few different flavors, since strawberries are a fruit that are at their peak around mid-May, why not go with that one? If you want to give it a shot, you can purchase a bottle of the spray (for under $14; the reviews are pretty good too) here.
10. Incorporate Some Wine Ice Cubes
Because red wine increases blood circulation, including to the genital region, it has long had the reputation of being an aphrodisiac. That said, the lead GIF for this? It comes from the movie Do the Right Thing when Mookie and Tina were enjoying some summer foreplay of their own.
Anyway, drastically changing the temperatures on your body from hot to cold can definitely heighten sexual arousal. So, rather than going with some regular ole' ice cubes, pour some red wine into your ice trays. Then, once they're frozen, rub them all over each other. It will feel and taste amazing. It will help to put you into the mood too.
If you're not a wine fan, another approach is to make some fruit cubes. All you're literally doing is putting tiny pieces of fruit and fruit juice or water into the ice trays instead of just water alone. Pineapple is great because it contains the enzyme bromelain which can naturally increase testosterone levels. Cucumbers work because the Vitamin C in them can improve bodily blood flow. Apples are another good idea because the polyphenols and antioxidants in them also increase blood circulation. Plus, fruit cubes taste really good.
11. Put Popsicles (or Frozen Berries) into Your Sex-Themed Cocktails
Back to Mookie. Something that he did to Tina while rubbing ice cubes all over her body was tell her the different things that he found to be sexy about her. If you're not someone who is stellar at dirty talk, a way to ease into it is to follow Mookie's lead. A less self-conscious approach would be to toast your partner (something that I'm naturally big on anyway). How?
Last summer, I wrote an article for the platform that featured summer-themed cocktails that can help to stir things up (check out "8 Summer-Themed Alcoholic Drinks That Can Boost Your Libido"). Put a couple of popsicles or a handful of frozen raspberries or blueberries into your glass. With each lick of the popsicle or each berry that you put into each other's mouths, take turns talking about what turns you on about each other. The words of affirmation combined with the licking visuals and the buzz of the alcohol can turn things into quite a special night.
12. Snack on Some Slices of Watermelon
Here's a food-related point that never gets old. Another fruit that is best eaten during the summertime (July thru August) is watermelon. And whew boy, if there's one fruit that has one of the best reputations around for being an aphrodisiac, this would be it. So much, in fact, that it has earned the nickname "natural Viagra". Watermelon is a sexy fruit because it contains a great amount of the amino acid citrulline. When it's consumed, it has a tendency to dilate blood vessels which is awesome when it comes to men who want to maintain their erection. As a bonus, since watermelon is 92 percent water, it's a natural way to keep you lubricated. And that's always a good thing.
13. Cop Some Waterproof Sex Toys
If you're always down for a good sex toy and you do plan on spending some time in the water this spring and summer seasons, do you have any waterproof sex toys that are currently in your possession? Whether it's a clitoral massager, a finger vibrator or a pocket-sized oral sex stimulator, when your toy can go into water, the sky really is the limit when it comes to your sex options—and locations.
14. Have Sex Outside
If you are a little daring and you're down for having sex outside, think outside of the box a little bit. Wait until dark and have sex in your car (make sure to bring along some of those ice cubes). Stand behind a tree and do it in the standing doggy or—if you're super limber—wheelbarrow position. Drive to a dead-end road and get on the hood of your vehicle. Go to an amusement park, request a private cab on a Ferris wheel and have at it. Go hiking and get off of the path (if you know what I mean). These are just a few suggestions that can help to get your imagination going.
15. Don’t Forget About National Orgasm Day
How much do I support folks having as many orgasms as possible? For now, I'll just share seven articles on the topic that I've written for the site:
- "10 Hacks To Help You Climax More Consistently"
- "10 Things You Didn't Know About The Male And Female Orgasm"
- "How To Have Mind-Blowing Multiple Orgasms. Tonight, Chile."
- "What Is A Super Orgasm & How Can I Have One?"
- "10 Weird & Random Things That Can Prevent An Orgasm"
- "How About Having A 'Mindful Orgasm' Tonight?"
- "U-Spot Orgasm, Fantasy Orgasm & 6 Other Orgasms You Should Try Tonight"
Orgasms are about experiencing an ultimate high with your partner and that is something that most of us never grow tired of. Well, in honor of all things orgasmic-related, did you know that July 31 is officially National Orgasm Day? Yep, there's an entire day, in the summer, that's totally devoted to you getting your freak on, as much as you want to. Back when I found that out, it had me so hype that I wrote about that as well (check out "Whew, Chile. It's National Orgasm Day!"). You've still got some time to get ready for that day like it's your birthday or Christmas or something. Make sure that you did and watch this be one of the HOTTEST spring and summer seasons for you yet!
Join our xoTribe, an exclusive community dedicated to YOU and your stories and all things xoNecole. Be a part of a growing community of women from all over the world who come together to uplift, inspire, and inform each other on all things related to the glow up.
Featured image by Giphy