8 Natural Aphrodisiac Scents, Where They Go & How To Make Them Last
Just when you think you've heard it all, chile. I recently read an article with a title that truly needs no further explanation. Ready? "Why I Sometimes Wear My Vaginal Juice As Perfume". It's not that I'm not aware of the fact that all of us have a signature vaginal scent and, so long as we're healthy and it's not pungent, men are naturally attracted to it (which is one of the billions of reasons why douching is totally unnecessary). It's just that, the thought of reaching down in order to put some of my vaginal fluid on my neck? Maybe I'm more prudish than I thought I was (I'm a Gemini, so it couldn't be that), but it's gonna be a hard pass for me.
Still, sometimes you come across things because it ends up "connecting the dots" to other stuff, and that's just what that read did for me. As I did some digging around about the power of scent, as it specifically relates to attraction and sex, here are some of the things that I discovered.
- Scent-wise, did you know that we're attracted to people whose genes do not match our own?
- Did you know that women are naturally attracted to the smell of a man's shaved arm pits?
- Did you know that, as far as pheromones go, we actually are drawn to a little bit of funk?
- Or that there's solid research to support that foods like donuts, cinnamon buns, cheese pizza, chocolate and cola also turn us on? (Think about that the next time you have a craving for one of those things.)
- And yes, if you heard somewhere that the combination of pumpkin essential oil and lavender essential oil can increase the blood flow into a man's penis by 40 percent, that is absolutely true.
This is proof that we've been blessed with five senses—sight, hearing, touch, taste and yes, smell—and they even play a role in appeal, captivation and copulation too. So since our sense of smell matters just as much as the rest of 'em, I thought it would be a good idea to share some all-natural aphrodisiacs that men are all for—along with where to put them and how to make them last long past the first wink…or kiss…or well, you know.
1. Vanilla
I can see why vanilla would be an aphrodisiac. It's got a scent that is soft and sweet; "delicious" is another word that immediately comes to mind. And yes, men adore it. One study revealed that when they are close to a woman who has vanilla on, the smell is able to increase sexual arousal in them by as much as nine percent. Research also reveals that it has a powerful calming effect on anxiety and has an incredible ability to soothe and relax, both men and women, as well.
2. Sandalwood
If you and/or your man would prefer a scent that isn't too feminine, sandalwood has totally got your back. It's got an earthy/woodsy smell that is very sexy and alluring at the same time. It's the kind of oil that's great for your skin (including acne and psoriasis), some people use it as a deodorant alternative and, it stimulates the pheromones in men and women. For women, it increases the libido and in men, it can prevent impotence from transpiring.
3. Cinnamon
Back in the day, cinnamon oil used to be my complete and total jam! It smells good, it tastes great and—how do I PG this?—it makes oral sex that much more pleasurable (how'd I do?). This is one of the oils that will literally warm you and your partner up. It also increase blood circulation, treats erectile dysfunction and, if you add a little honey and sweet almond oil to it, well…kindly refer back to what I said about it and oral sex. Total. Game. Changer.
4. Carpolobia
This might just qualify as your something new for the day.
I find this particular essential oil to be awesome because legend has it that men in certain parts of African used to chew on Carpolobia root an hour or so before sex in order to enhance their sexual performance (so it must be good!).
There are also studies to support that this is an herb that helps to heal male infertility while boosting the libido of men and women in the process.
As far as finding it goes, it's not nearly as easy as the rest of the oils on this list. But I did find a connect on Etsy if you're interested in giving it a shot.
5. Black Licorice
If you're not the biggest fan of black licorice, strictly from a taste standpoint, I'll just say this—it does have some pretty impressive health benefits. It's got the ability to cleanse your respiratory system, reduce stress, treat eczema, soothe the symptoms that are directly related to heartburn, stomach ulcers and food poisoning. So, if you'd prefer not to eat it, consider sipping on some black licorice tea. Or, putting it on your body. When men get a whiff of it, it increases sexual arousal in them by as much as 13 percent; that amount jumps all the way up to 32 percent if they smell licorice in combination with donuts.
6. Rose
An essential oil that has the ability to relieve depression-related symptoms, prevent nightmares (pretty crazy, huh?) and boost your self-confidence is the delicate feminine scent of rose. Rose is also able to help stabilize mood swings and regulate menstrual cycles. Plus, it has an uncanny way of "triggering" our body's natural sex hormones. It's another scent that increases blood circulation too. The more blood that's down below, the longer the erections and the more intense the orgasms are too.
7. Pink Grapefruit
I like to drink pink grapefruit juice. Good thing too because, on the health-tip, it's a fruit that boosts our immune system, helps to control our blood sugar levels, aids in weight loss, improves heart health and can even help to prevent asthma attacks. It makes this list because, along with increasing blood circulation and giving us more energy, interestingly enough, the smell of pink grapefruit makes us appear somewhere around 5-6 years younger. Like it or not, youth is a big turn on to a lot of guys so, there you go.
8. Jasmine
Jasmine is very sweet and romantic. It's one of my favorites, for sure. It's an oil that works as an antidepressant and sedative. It also encourages positive thoughts, and it's very sensual.
In fact, in certain parts of India, jasmine is the signature wedding flower because of its ability to enhance feelings of love and desire.
Use it as an oil to shave your legs (it reduces irritation) or a DIY massage oil ingredient. You won't regret it. He won't either.
Honorable Mention: Popcorn
Yep, you read that right. If you're someone who loves diving into a big bowl of popcorn, the fiber, whole grains, minerals and vitamins make it a healthy snack. Just make sure that you totally avoid the microwavable kind; the lining of the bag can actually decrease your libido (among other things).
And yes, if you're eating someone while sitting on the couch and watching a movie with your boo, there's a good chance that he won't be paying too much attention to what's on the screen. Popcorn is also an aphrodisiac scent. If there's butter on it, it can spike up a man's drive by nine percent (ain't that a trip?).
Where to Place Aphrodisiac Oils on Your Body
What a little trial and error (combined with some additional research) have taught me is knowing where to put an aphrodisiac scent is about as important as the one that you choose.
First, make sure that you pay attention to what is known as your "pulse points"; those are the areas of your body where your blood vessels are the closest to your skin; they produce more heat which can intensify the scent. Where exactly are some of your points? Places like your inner wrists, right where your elbow bends, the base of your neck, behind your earlobes and knees and in between your breasts are some good ones.
As far as your wrists go, just make sure to not do what a lot of us are guilty of doing—applying an oil or perfume and then rubbing our wrists together. What that ends up doing is activating too much of our natural body chemistry which could end up diluting or "crushing" the authenticity or potency of the smell.
Something else to keep in mind is, if you're using one of these oils as a way to heat up a night of passion, not all essential oils are edible (you can read more about that here). Plus, not all of them taste the best. Keep that in mind as you're contemplating where to place your favorite scent (cinnamon and vanilla taste great, by the way). One way to kinda get around the non-edible kind is to put those oils onto your hands and rub them over your lingerie; that way, your body will smell like the oil sans experiencing the bitter or icky taste of it.
How to Make Essential Oils Last for Hours on End
If you want to make an aphrodisiac scent last from the moment you put it on until the time you get it on, one way to do that is to create a mist with the essential oil in it and lightly mist your hair. Between the essential oil and your own hair's natural oils, the scent will remain on your tresses for hours.
Another cool tip is to put 10-15 drops of one of these oils into a fragrance-free moisturizer or carrier oil like grapeseed, almond, jojoba, sweet almond or avocado oil. The scent will be amazing, and your skin will be silky soft.
Something else that can make essential oils more potent is combining them. It may take a couple of tries to get exactly what you're looking for, but I'm a big fan of this too because it can create a signature scent that no one else has (and you don't have to tell anyone about).
Just one more thing. If your plan is to apply a little bit of the oil to your vaginal region, make sure to also dilute it with a carrier oil and to put it on your vulva, not in your vagina. If you want to be taken totally out of the mood, avoid this pearl of wisdom and see what happens (burn baby, burn!).
Well, there you have it. Whether it's for a hot date or a very sexy night, here's a cheat sheet on how to make you even more unforgettable—from the very moment he catches even a little whiff of your totally intoxicating scent.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
How To Eat Your Way To Better Sex
Do You Swallow? The Unexpected Health Benefits Of Sperm
Want A More Intense Orgasm? These Tips Are Sure To Make You Cream
Married Couples: These 6 DIY Recipes Will Take Your Sex Life To The Next Level
Feature image by Giphy
Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next June (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Sheila Rashid's Androgynous Approach To Unisex Clothing Is A Lesson In Embracing Individuality
The ItGirl 100 List is a celebration of 100 Black women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table.
For Sheila Rashid, it all started with some free-hand drawings and a few strokes of paint.
The Chicago-based clothing designer and creative director of Sheila Rashid Brand recalls using her spare time in high school to hand paint designs on t-shirts and distressed hoodies, distributing them to classmates as walking billboards for her art.
Rashid sought to pursue fashion design at Columbia College in Chicago but eventually took the self-taught route to build upon her knack for crafting one-of-a-kind, androgynous pieces.
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Thanks to the mentorship of local designers taking her under their wings, Rashid was able to gain valuable experience in putting together collections and creating patterns; equipping her with them with the necessary skills to pursue her own collections.
After two years of living in New York, Rashid returned home to the Chi and uncovered the unique flair she could offer the city. “I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world,” she tells xoNecole. “That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
For the Midwest native, inspiration comes from her time around creative peers and the city’s notorious winters — known to be a main character in many Chicagoans stories. “It's a different perspective and mindset when I'm making stuff because of the weather here,” she explains. “When we get summer, it’s ‘Summertime Chi’ — it's amazing. It's beautiful. Still, I find myself always making clothes that cater to the winter.”
"I moved to New York after that because I wanted to be in the fashion capital world. That's when I really got a leg up. I found myself when I moved back to Chicago after moving to New York.”
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Many designers have a signature aesthetic or theme in their creations. In Rashid’s design story, dancing between the lines of femininity and masculinity is how she’s been able to distinguish herself within the industry. Her androgynous clothing has garnered the eye of celebrities like Zendaya, Chance the Rapper, WNBA star Sydney Colson, and more — showing her range and approach to designs with inclusivity in mind.
“I think I do reflect my own style,” she says. “When I do make pieces, I'm very tomboyish, androgynous. My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes.” From denim to overalls, and color-drenched outerwear, Rashid has mastered the structure of statement pieces that tell a story.
“Each collection, I never know what's going to be the thing I'm going to focus on. I try to reflect my own style and have fun with the storytelling,” she shares. “I look at it more like it's my art in this small way of expressing myself, so it's not that calculated.”
"My work is unisex because I feel like everybody can wear it. I cater to everybody and that's how I try to approach my clothes."
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Still, if you were able to add up all the moments within Rashid’s 20-year career in design, one theme that has multiplied her into becoming an “ItGirl” is her confidence to take up space within the fashion industry as a queer, Black woman. “Being an ItGirl is about being yourself, loving what you do, finding your niche, and mastering that,” she says.
No matter where you are on your ItGirl journey, Rashid says to always remain persistent and never hesitate to share your art with the world. “Don’t give up. Even if it's something small, finish it and don't be afraid to put it out,” she says, “It's about tackling your own fear of feeling like you have to please everybody, but just please yourself, and that's good enough.”
To learn more about the ItGirl 100 List, view the full list here.
Featured image Courtesy