Eat Your Way To Better Sex With Aphrodisiacs


Soo…when's the last time you went out specifically with the intention of picking up an aphrodisiac or two? If it takes you more than a minute to come up with an answer, that means you don't do it nearly enough! Even if your sex life is on point and the mutual desire is still going strong, it's still a good idea to invest in things that will take you and your partner's arousal to higher levels. This includes copping jasmine and patchouli essential oils, white linen (why do you think hotels use white sheets? They are proven to boost our libidos), Vitamin E (it increases blood circulation, including to the genitalia), chocolate-flavored anything (its phenethylamine and tryptophan compounds trigger sexual arousal) — and certain foods.

Just by adding these to your diet on a consistent basis, your libido will strengthen, your orgasms will intensify, and your overall health and well-being will improve too. So, where's your grocery store list? Check it twice to see if you've got these eight foods written down:

8 Healthy Foods That Improve Your Sex Life



It's kind of surprising that a food that's made up of 95 percent water could contain so many health benefits, but celery does. The Vitamin C, beta carotene, and flavonoids in it make celery a food that's high in antioxidants. Celery also contains around 25 compounds that fight to reduce inflammation. And, thanks to the magnesium, iron, and sodium that's also in celery, it can help to neutralize the acids in the foods so that you can digest them better.

Sex-wise, celery is also a winner. There are plenty of studies to support that if a man eats it and sweats, it creates the kind of pheromones that attract women. Word on the street is that it's also the kind of food that will make bodily fluids taste better too!

2.Sweet Potatoes


Thanks to all of the nutrients that are found in sweet potatoes, they are considered to be a superfood. They are high in vitamins A, B1, B2, B3, B6 and C, copper, biotin, and potassium. They contain manganese, which is great because it's a nutrient that helps to produce collagen in the body. Sweet potatoes are also the kind of food that keeps your blood sugar and blood pressure where it needs to be.

For guys, the potassium in sweet potatoes helps their erections to last longer. For gals, the Vitamin A helps to create more cervical fluid. This means that if you're trying to get pregnant, sweet potatoes work like a charm.



It's almost criminal how honey can taste so sweet and be one of the best things for you, but it's true. If you get a local raw brand, honey works as a natural remedy for allergy symptoms. The antioxidants in honey will work to prevent cellular damage and improve your memory (especially if you're going through post-menopause). Honey will also give you more energy, heal wounds, reduce dandruff, and is an awesome humectant that keeps your hair and skin full of moisture.

On the sex tip, honey has Vitamin B in it to support the production of testosterone and boron in it to naturally increase the amount of estrogen in women. Both are needed for an active sex life.


almonds on display


If you like to snack on almonds during your lunch break, you are definitely doing your body good. There's fiber, protein, Vitamin E, and magnesium all up in those nuts! Almonds also contain properties that will lower your cholesterol levels, nutrients to reduce hunger cravings and catechin, epicatechin, and flavonol antioxidants to keep your skin healthy and glowing.

Why are they a great aphrodisiac? For starters, the selenium and zinc in them are ideal for reproductive health. Also, their omega-3 fatty acids work to boost blood circulation so that both erections and orgasms will last longer!

5.Coconut Water


Over the past few years, coconut water has become all the rage; especially when it comes to staying hydrated during the summer seasons or after a workout. But there are other reasons to consume it on a regular basis.

Coconut water is low in calories (around 40 per serving), has copper and magnesium in it, and also contains a compound called cytokinins. What's so good about that? It helps to prevent cancerous cells while slowing down the aging process too. Just make sure to consume coconut water in moderation. It's loaded with potassium, which can cause side effects like a breakdown in muscle tissue or even diabetes if you go overboard on it.

Something else that's cool about coconut water is it has the same amount of electrolytes in it that your blood does. This means that it's a proven way to give your metabolism a kick, providing you with the energy you need to engage in coitus after a long day at work.



Vitamins B5, B6, C, E and K are just some of the nutrients that are in avocados. They also have monounsaturated fatty acids in them that are great for your heart, fiber to keep you regular, antioxidants that are good for your eyes, and folate that aids in fighting depression symptoms.

As far as your libido is concerned, here's a fun fact. Back in the day, the Aztecs used to call the avocado tree "Ahuacuatl". What does that translate into? The testicle tree. A part of that comes from the way an avocado looks when it's cut in half (bet you'll never look at one the same), along with the potassium and folic acid in it that increases stamina and provides energy.



As far as spices go, it's a must that you put some freshly-ground cinnamon in your pantry. The polyphenols in it will fight off free radicals and its anti-inflammatory properties will help to repair damaged tissues in the body. Cinnamon also contains properties that fight off insulin resistance and lower blood sugar levels. Cinnamon even inhibits a protein in the brain that could later lead to Alzheimer's disease or Parkinson's disease.

Cinnamon will definitely spice up your sex life too! Seasoning your food with it will increase your body temperature so that you feel all warm (and potentially horny) inside. Putting some edible-grade cinnamon oil essential oil in your mouth will make kisses (everywhere) sweeter and hotter! Plus, since it's proven to improve cognitive function, if you or your partner need help staying in the moment more, cinnamon has got your covered in that area too.



Do yourself a favor and treat yourself to a truffle this week. This mushroom delicacy does everything from lower cholesterol levels and slow down the aging process to treat eye infections and boost your immune system. Truffles are able to do all of this, thanks in part to the magnesium, iron, and calcium that's in them.

Why does this particular food make the aphrodisiac list? It's actually thanks to how it smells. It's got a musky scent that replicates male pheromones and triggers sexual desire in women.

But hey, don't take our word for it. Give it a shot and report back. Whenever you come up for air from all of that sex you'll be having after you do, that is!

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You may not know her by Elisabeth Ovesen – writer and host of the love, sex and relationships advice podcast Asking for a Friend. But you definitely know her other alter ego, Karrine Steffans, the New York Times best-selling author who lit up the literary and entertainment world when she released what she called a “tell some” memoir, Confessions of a Video Vixen.

Her 2005 barn-burning book gave an inside look at the seemingly glamorous world of being a video vixen in the ‘90s and early 2000s, and exposed the industry’s culture of abuse, intimidation, and misogyny years before the Me Too Movement hit the mainstream. Her follow-up books, The Vixen Diaries (2007) and The Vixen Manual: How To Find, Seduce And Keep The Man You Want (2009) all topped the New York Times best-seller list. After a long social media break, she's back. xoNecole caught up with Ovesen about the impact of her groundbreaking book, what life is like for her now, and why she was never “before her time”– everyone else was just late to the revolution.

xoNecole: Tell me about your new podcast Asking for a Friend with Elisabeth Ovesen and how that came about.

Elisabeth Ovesen: I have a friend who is over [at Blavity] and he just asked me if I wanted to do something with him. And that's just kinda how it happened. It wasn't like some big master plan. Somebody over there was like, “Hey, we need content. We want to do this podcast. Can you do it?” And I was like, “Sure.” And that's that. That was around the holidays and so we started working on it.

xoNecole: Your life and work seem incredibly different from when you first broke out on the scene. Can you talk a bit about the change in your career and how your life is now?

EO: Not that different. I mean my life is very different, of course, but my work isn't really that different. My life is different, of course, because I'm 43. My career started when I was in my 20s, so we're looking at almost 20 years since the beginning of my career. So, naturally life has changed a lot since then.

I don’t think my career has changed a whole lot – not as far as my writing is concerned, and my stream of consciousness with my writing, and my concerns and the subject matter hasn’t changed much. I've always written about interpersonal relationships, sexual shame, male ego fragility, respectability politics – things like that. I always put myself in the center of that to make those points, which I think were greatly missed when I first started writing. I think that society has changed quite a bit. People are more aware. People tell me a lot that I have always been “before my time.” I was writing about things before other people were talking about that; I was concerned about things before my generation seemed to be concerned about things. I wasn't “before my time.” I think it just seems that way to people who are late to the revolution, you know what I mean?

I retired from publishing in 2015, which was always the plan to do 10 years and retire. I was retired from my pen name and just from the business in general in 2015, I could focus on my business, my education and other things, my family. I came back to writing in 2020 over at Medium. The same friend that got me into the podcast, actually as the vice president of content over at Medium and was like, “Hey, we need some content.” I guess I’m his go-to content creator.

xoNecole: Can you expound on why you went back to your birth name versus your stage name?

EO: No, it was nothing to expound upon. I mean, writers have pen names. That’s like asking Diddy, why did he go by Sean? I didn't go back. I've always used that. Nobody was paying attention. I've never not been myself. Karrine Steffans wrote a certain kind of book for a certain kind of audience. She was invented for the urban audience, particularly. She was never meant to live more than 10 years. I have other pen names as well. I write under several names. So, the other ones are just nobody's business right now. Different pen names write different things. And Elisabeth isn’t my real name either. So you'll never know who I really am and you’ll never know what my real name is, because part of being a writer is, for me at least, keeping some sort of anonymity. Anything I do in entertainment is going to amass quite a bit because who I am as a person in my private life isn't the same a lot of times as who I am publicly.

xoNecole: I want to go back to when you published Confessions of a Video Vixen. We are now in this time where people are reevaluating how the media mistreated women in the spotlight in the 2000s, namely women like Britney Spears. So I’d be interested to hear how you feel about that period of your life and how you were treated by the media?

EO: What I said earlier. I think that much of society has evolved quite a bit. When you look back at that time, it was actually shocking how old-fashioned the thinking still was. How women were still treated and how they're still treated now. I mean, it hasn't changed completely. I think that especially for the audience, I think it was shocking for them to see a woman – a woman of color – not be sexually ashamed.

I hate being like other people. I don't want to do what anyone else is doing. I can't conform. I will not conform. I think in 2005 when Confessions was published, that attitude, especially about sex, was very upsetting. Number one, it was upsetting to the men, especially within urban and hip-hop culture, which is built on misogyny and thrives off of it to this day. And the women who protect these men, I think, you know, addressing a demographic that is rooted in trauma that is rooted in sexual shame, trauma, slavery of all kinds, including slavery of the mind – I think it triggered a lot of people to see a Black woman be free in this way.

I think it said a lot about the people who were upset by it. And then there were some in “crossover media,” a lot of white folks were upset too, not gonna lie. But to see it from Black women – Tyra Banks was really upset [when she interviewed me about Confessions in 2005]. Oprah wasn't mad [when she interviewed me]. As long as Oprah wasn’t mad, I was good. I didn't care what anybody else had to say. Oprah was amazing. So, watching Black women defend men, and Black women who had a platform, defend the sexual blackmailing of men: “If you don't do this with me, you won't get this job”; “If you don't do this in my trailer, you're going to have to leave the set”– these are things that I dealt with.

I just happened to be the kind of woman who, because I was a single mother raising my child all by myself and never got any help at all – which I still don't. Like, I'm 24 in college – not a cheap college either – one of the best colleges in the country, and I'm still taking care of him all by myself as a 21-year-old, 20-year-old, young, single mother with no family and no support – I wasn’t about to say no to something that could help me feed my son for a month or two or three.

xoNecole: We are in this post-Me Too climate where women in Hollywood have come forward to talk about the powerful men who have abused them. In the music industry in particular, it seems nearly impossible for any substantive change or movement to take place within music. It's only now after three decades of allegations that R. Kelly has finally been convicted and other men like Russell Simmons continue to roam free despite the multiple allegations against him. Why do you think it's hard for the music industry to face its reckoning?

EO: That's not the music industry, that's urban music. That’s just Black folks who make music and nobody cares about that. That's the thing; nobody cares...Nobody cares. It's not the music industry. It's just an "urban" thing. And when I say "urban," I say that in quotations. Literally, it’s a Black thing, where nobody gives a shit what Black people do to Black people. And Russell didn't go on unchecked, he just had enough money to keep it quiet. But you know, anytime you're dealing with Black women being disrespected, especially by Black men, nobody gives a shit.

And Black people don't police themselves so it doesn't matter. Why should anybody care? And Black women don't care. They'll buy an R. Kelly album right now. They’ll stream that shit right now. They don’t care. So, nobody cares. Nobody cares. And if you're not going to police yourself, then nobody's ever going to care.

xoNecole: Do you have any regrets about anything you wrote or perhaps something you may have omitted?

EO: Absolutely not. No. There's nothing that I wish I would've gone back and said to myself, no. I don’t think at 20-something years old, I'm supposed to understand every little thing. I don't think the 20-something-year-old woman is supposed to understand the world and know exactly what she's doing. I think that one of my biggest regrets, which isn't my regret, but a regret, is that I didn't have better parents. Because a 20-something only knows what she knows based on what she’s seen and what she’s been taught and what she’s told. I had shitty parents and a horrible family. Just terrible. These people had no business having children. None of them. And a lot of our families are like that. And we may pass down those familial curses.

*This interview has been edited and condensed

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Feature image courtesy of Elisabeth Ovesen

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