The term selfie was coined, curated, and continued by the ever-innovative millennial. Sure, other generations were taking selfies with their disposable kodaks but we were the group to give this concept life. And while many of us mastered the necessary nooks, crannies, and angles to aim the target at in order to take the best of the best selfies, we're still mastering the art of the sexy selfies, er, thirst traps depending on who's asking and who's telling.
Sexy selfies are more distinguished, poised, sophisticated than your run of the mill nude pic. It leaves just enough to the imagination while also allowing the imagination of your target audience to get a sneak peak of what they're actually missing...at least for the moment.
Sexy selfies say "stay ready, so you don't have to get ready" should a nosey mofo somehow find their way into your private collection, in the case that you reserve them for a special someone (yourself included). Regular nudes scream "basic" and "amateur." At this grown age, we should all take pride in our sexy selfies, regardless of who they're intended for—if for no reason other than if I go out (because I've been tried), I'm going out with a lawsuit and hella pride. Nothing less.
Sexy selfies run the gamut when it comes to the attire. You can be as naked as you please, but as you'll know from your experience with regular selfies, it's the pose and angles everytime that put the sex in sexy.
While it does take patience, it's not impossible for any of us to pull off our own little boudoir photos. But, if you've ever seen your homegirl or fave influencer or whoever, post sexy selfies and wonder "how" — wonder no more. I reached out to the sexiest, most sensual selfie-taking people (myself included) that I know of for the best tips on how to execute and shoot your own sexy selfies.
Kiarra Sylvester, She/Her, Sex Educator
Courtesy of Kiarra Sylvester
"It's far from a perfect science and I'm far form being the perfect scientist but here's what I can say as the underdog of sexy selfies: Seduce yourself! View yourself from the same lens that a romantic partner might view you from — that's the type of self-love and unwavering lusty confidence that makes for a good selfie.
"Also, be committed to trying various angles! For a good one man shoot, I've gone as far as taping my phone to a ceiling fan for a flattering aerial view. As always, accessories are a girl's best friend! I, personally, have used everything from wigs, hand fans, and mirrors.
"Lastly, it's give and take. Give a little thigh, take a little thigh. Much like a game of operation you want to try moving all of your parts until you've got a match. The mind-fuckery of using a little thigh or arm wrap as a makeshift boa drives people wild, adding a touch of mystery."
Orixa, She/Her, Founder of Bad Girl, Good Human
Courtesy of Orixa
"I developed a level of comfort with my sensuality and self-portraiture by paying attention to myself and studying my reflection daily. Wherever I can see me, I pay attention. However, translating poses into stills isn't the greatest takeaway. It is emoting. Whatever you feel in that moment. Remaining fluent in your movement while in the act is what brings a sexy selfie home."
Tailah, She/Her, OnlyFans Entrepreneur
Courtesy of Tailah
"Taking a sexy selfie is not as simple as it looks. But over time, it gets easier. Like anything, you get better with practice. Knowing your angles is the first step. The saying 'one size fits all' does not apply to selfies angles. Find yours. You want to accent the sexy parts of you. Curves, curves, curves!
"Next step is to laugh. Literally, laugh out loud. Laughing at yourself will relax your face and body. It reminds you that it ain't that serious, it's just a selfie after all. Step three is the 'smize.' Yes, Tyra Banks' advice of smiling with your eyes is for real. They say 'the eyes are the key to the soul' or something like that. Look into that camera like it's the guy or girl of your dreams.
"These three steps should give you a good sexy selfie to work with. Don't skip the small details like moisturized lips, good lighting, an outfit that makes you feel like a snack, a clean space. But this is common freaking sense. All that smizing in front of a dirty bathroom sink? No baby."
Ev'Yan Whitney, They/She, Sexuality Doula and Sex Educator
Courtesy of Ev'Yan Whitney
"Two of my favorite go-to tricks for my best sensual selfies that I teach in my sensual self-portraiture classes are angles and flowers. Going into it, it's important that you're familiar with your body type, its curves, features, and how you're able to position it. I recommend doing some posing in the mirror and trying out different positions; this is a great way to get to know your body. Once you do that, you'll begin to find ways to angle your body to accentuate what you've got or boost what you don't.
"I'm a member of the small booty club but in this photo, you wouldn't know it based on the way I'm sitting—which, I'm squatting on my toes, arching my back, and strategically cropping the shot in such a way that makes my thighs and ass look bodacious (wearing thong underwear really helps too). I like to add flowers to all of my sensual selfies to bring some color and sensual softness to the shot. If all else fails, flowers are the perfect prop to play up, censor, or accentuate your sexy selfie. Buy yourself a bouquet and have fun exploring the ways you can wear flowers like an accessory."
Kendra, She/Her, Sex Educator
Courtesy of Kendra
"Personally, I like to tell stories with my selfies. So my first piece of advice to the selfie-taker is, ask yourself what you're trying to say or share through your selfie: is it just a 'look at me because I'm hot' pic? 'Decipher my brooding eyes' pic? WHAT if anything do you want your viewers to pick up on?
"Secondly, choose your setting. Whether it's predetermined or an impromptu decision, setting can add or take away from your photo. Decorate accordingly. This entails moving items and/or furniture around. Choose your lighting. Are you working with superficial light or those 8 a.m. rays coming through your window?
"Decide if the photo should be touched up or untouched (i.e filters, Photoshop, etc). There's no shame in editing. Filters aren't always about making blemishes magically disappear. You can add some shimmer here or there, fade a background, or blur some parts."
Allie J, She/Her, Hair Stylist and Model
Courtesy of Allie J
"When taking sexy selfies, I always make sure that I smell tasty. Smelling tasty makes me feel good and gets me hype for pictures. Knowing your angles is important, whether you're taking a picture of just your *assets*, your silhouette or just your face. For example, for my baby booty girls, the best angle is having the camera almost angled under it, making it look more juicy.
"Lastly, lighting is key for creating whatever mood you're in or trying to create. Dim light for some sultry vibes, different color LED lights for artsy vibes, or just natural golden hour for a flawless face/body pic. But the most important tip is confidence, confidence yields the best pics because the energy shines through!"
Sheriden Chanel, She/Her, Managing Editor of xoNecole and Podcast Host
Courtesy of Sheriden Chanel
"First and foremost, I take photos of myself for me. No matter what state I am in, clothed, unclothed, whether it makes it to the 'gram or just to my man's phone, I am operating from a space where I feel beautiful and connected deeply to myself. My self-portraits are one of the ways I make love to me and remind myself I am worthy of adoration. Sexy selfies definitely take that up a notch (or several) by reminding myself that I am also a sexual being. Moreover, I can tap into those sensual and sexual sides of myself without penetration, without sex, or without a partner.
"For me, it's all about good lighting and the mindset. My best tips for taking a sexy selfie is to first do something that makes you feel connected to your body. For me, that's dancing. I am reminded of hips, of softness, of the strength and the subtle fragility of my womanhood. I like capturing myself after those moments. I find a window to act as my source of light and light sheen of sweat that covers me adds to my glow. And then it's about seduction. Connect with the camera but also connect with your body. Accentuate your favorite parts of your body and find beauty in the simple things: displayed shoulders, the expanse of your back, exposed tattoos that feel like whispered secrets, the curve of your peach, parted lips, and hair.
"I have other photos, but perhaps this is the one that felt safest for work to me to share..."
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Featured image courtesy of Ev'Yan Whitney
The Libra woman is looking for her equal in love, someone who is willing to put in the same effort she is, and the Aries man sees Libra as someone he is willing to do that with.
The Love Compatibility Of A Libra Woman And An Aries Man
What attracts a Libra woman and an Aries man to each other?
There is a magnet of attraction pulling these two together, and things tend to move pretty fast in this relationship. The Libra woman is always open to love and her charming nature rarely has any challenges here. The Aries man fights for his independence and doesn’t sacrifice that unless he is completely enamored with someone.
Once the Aries man catches the eye of the Libra woman, he is typically the one to make the first move and this instantly wins the approval of Libra.
These two feel like they have known each other forever when they meet, and this spark between them doesn’t die down easily.
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What is the relationship like between a Libra woman and an Aries man?
The relationship between the Libra woman and the Aries man is one of balance and excitement. The Aries man tends to take on the more dominant role in this relationship and the Libra woman tends to be the more receptive one. Aries is ruled by masculine Mars, and Libra is ruled by feminine Venus. They understand they are coming from two completely different worlds, yet they also instinctively feel this underlying connection to each other and like they could be something each other needs in their lives.
The Libra woman can rely on the Aries man, and the Aries man never has to ask for the love that Libra already knows he needs.
This is a couple that is often reading each other’s minds and wanting to do a lot of the same things. However, not everything is rainbow in this relationship as well, and there are some major differences they have to overcome to make things work. One argument can lead to an explosion between these two, and addressing things when they come up rather than sweeping them under the rug, will be needed to make this relationship long-term.
What is the sex like between a Libra woman and an Aries man?
The sex between a Libra woman and an Aries man is adventurous. These are two cardinal signs with plenty of energy and stamina to keep things exciting in the bedroom. There tends to be a good give and take in this relationship, and their yin and yang energy benefits them when it comes to their sex life.
There is electricity felt between the two of them in this area of their life, and their power of attraction to each other is strong. These are two people who will want to do a lot of things together, including exploring sexually together.
The Aries man will have to be careful with being overly aggressive, however, as the soft Libra woman may not like this energy- it will completely depend on the two individuals at hand. The Libra woman wants to ease into things, the Aries man wants to get going right away. Learning about each other's bodies, and energy, and reading each other’s cues will help with this.
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What makes a relationship between a Libra woman and an Aries man work?
These two genuinely like each other, and that basis is a key factor for success in any relationship. The Aries man is straight to the point, direct, and inspired. The Libra woman admires these characteristics in others, as she is often herself finding her balance in this type of energy as well. Neither sign is overly emotional in a way that turns them off, and they both require a lot of the same things in a committed relationship. They want honesty, fun, good communication, passion, and to be moving towards a common goal together.
The Libra woman and Aries man don’t have a problem being real with each other and this is something they really value within the relationship. They are both very charming, and there is plenty of flirtation and attraction to keep this relationship going. Aries being the protector they are, Libra finds a sense of safety and ease in this energy, and like they have found their match. Overall, this is a well-balanced relationship and one where they don’t have a problem when it comes to compatibility or chemistry in the relationship.
What may cause a Libra woman and an Aries man to break up?
Libra is the lover, Aries is the fighter, and this energy may be tiring for the both of them after time. The Libra woman can be passive to a fault, and the Aries man who is not evolved, may take advantage of that. She will need to be careful with putting Aries’ needs above her own, creating resentment later down the road. The Aries man loves a challenge, and the Libra woman would be up for that game for a little bit, but if she is not being met in the middle, she will begin to look for other places. These two can have a difficult time keeping the peace in the relationship, and there could be a lot of arguments and disagreements here if they both aren’t willing to put their egos or self-pleasing attitudes to the side.
The Libra woman and Aries man are both more sensitive than they appear or come off as. They are also not necessarily the type to dive deep into their emotions and express them to others, even in their relationships. However, this energy can keep the relationship to a surface level than what is needed to progress and grow the relationship, and a sense of openness is required for this couple to work. Libra needs romance, she wants to be wowed. Aries needs to remember this and to always consider her love language.
Summary
Overall, this is a successful pairing. They will have their fair share of challenges in the relationship, but nothing they can’t overcome if they are willing to. The trouble will come in when it comes to the longevity of the relationship, keeping Aries excited and Libra in love. However, all in all, there is more power, attraction, and love to keep this relationship together rather than apart. No relationship is perfect, but this one is a little more blessed than most.
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