Anyone who has turned 30 can look around and realize they might not have the same group of friends they had when they turned 20. Life happens, we relocate, we take on different journeys in life, and we just don't have the convenience of going across campus to binge TV. As much as we want to be the real-life version of Girlfriends – channeling our inner Joan, Toni, Maya, or Lynn, as we get older, our circle gets smaller and smaller. It might even turn into a triangle (or a line for those who just don't have time for the BS). Still, there's a type of friend that each of us needs during this phase in our life.
If we think our 20s are significant, our 30s are defining. But they can be the best years with these types of friends your life.
1. Your Person:
This is your BFF, your ride or die. The Oprah to your Gayle. The Kelly to your Beyonce. We all need that one friend who just gets us. They've been with us through thick and thin and aren't going anywhere. They're supportive, but not afraid to tell us the truth out of love. They love us for who we are, and the feelings are clearly mutual. They know all of our secrets but would never reveal them because we know theirs too. You can be yourself around them, free of judgment, and they feel the same. It's the definition of a true friendship.
2. The Optimistic Friend:
Whether these are the years you'll experience life's biggest heartaches, or the happiest moments that will always make you smile, or both, you need a positive-vibes-only friend by your side. The optimistic friend is the one who always finds the positive in any situation. No, they're not wishing on rainbows and unicorns, but they understand that whatever is going on, you'll get through it. And they will always be there to remind you of that. They support you first and ask questions later. They're not perfect, but their attitude definitely inspires you to be better and have an amazing outlook on life.
3. The Reliable Friend:
Gone are the days of the flaky friend. Who has time for that? This isn't a push to just go and cut people off (unless you feel that's what you need), but when you're reflecting on the friendships in your life, who do you know you can depend on, no matter what? The reliable friend is a must-have in our 30s. This is a time in our lives when we're building our careers, our families and our lives. The whole decade is a staple, and we need a friend who will show up and be consistent… and pretty much do what they say they'll do as we reciprocate the love.
4. The Beyond The Surface Friend:
Have you ever realized that some friendships that were once the closest don't really go beyond the surface anymore? Or maybe they never have. Some friendships are meant to be fun and exciting, but others are purposed to be more than social events and group chats. The beyond the surface friend goes deeper than the typical associate. You don't just talk about life, you do it together, no matter how much distance comes between you over time. This is one of the many types of friendships that take work. But when we have milestone moments, they're the ones who we want there with us.
5. The Adventurous Friend:
I literally have a friend who will ask, "Do you want to go to Aruba?.. Like, next week?" Sis keeps me on my toes! Obviously, seven days isn't enough time to plan or save for an international trip, but the type of friend who isn't afraid to be spontaneous is definitely needed during our 30s. They let us know it's OK to let our hair down and actually have fun! Everything doesn't have to be so serious all the time. Our best memories don't have to be the ones we plan. In fact, some of them are experienced on the fly when we least expect it. And we can live it to the fullest, thanks to our adventurous friend who isn't afraid to take a risk, try something new and push us to do the same.
6. The Work Friend:
Who doesn't love a good work friend?! Someone who understands what you go through from 9-5. While the friendship starts out at work, sometimes it can grow into so much more. You might find yourself inviting them to your birthday parties, weddings and baby showers. But the best part is, thanks to being around them basically all day every day, this is one of the friendships that are the most organic. You might only chat at work, or you could vent to each other after hours or during lunch. Either way, there's nothing like having a solid work friend in our 30s.
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