In the black community, there's an unwritten rule to knowing how to do our hair. Whether we are natural, relaxed, or wearing our lacefronts, we have all got a process to our own self-maintenance. The wave of natural hair began roughly 8-10 years ago when women collectively decided we no longer wanted to subscribe to chemicals and seek growth through our natural follicles.
And from here, the creativity of how we adjust our crowns, has no bounds.
GiphyThe rules, the products, the new terms that arised, generally, this is all very new to us. So, in many ways, we don't expect, or haven't expected anyone of other races to know wtf they're doing. Actresses like Monique Coleman, recently came forward and said that her High School Musical character wore headbands all the time because the stylist crew had zero idea in how to style black hair. Many other actresses have come forward to express the same sentiments, even saying that makeup artists were clueless on how to do their makeup, and they often would have to do it themselves. Ain't that a bitch?
Additionally, women of other races that adopt black children seek outside help when they get that wake-up call that our hair is precious, and takes time, effort, and work that no blowdryer or sleeping with wet hair can contain.
So, when YouTuber Christy Gior adopted her three children, who happen to be black, she knew she had to learn how to do her babies' hair. And now, sis has gotten so good, since the girls are old enough, she is now teaching her daughters to wash their own hair. And y'all, she gives some bomb tips too...my wig!
In a video titled, "Curly Kids Wash Day Routine 4a 4b 4c I Tips For Foster and Adoptive Parents", she documents the journey of learning to how to maintain their hair.
"In today's video, I'm going to washing my daughter Avaya's hair. The last time I washed it, I just did a cowash, so it's been a little over a month since I actually washed her hair. Yes, that's normal, that is our normal hair wash routine. Her style has been in her hair for about two and a half weeks now. I wanted to ride it out a little while longer because I've really been trying to concentrate on growth, but because my baby girls are going back to school in two weeks, I wanted them to have a fresh style for their back to school."
*Clutches pearls*
"I decided now is the time to take it out, get it moisturized, and back in a protective style, and right before school starts, I will do another fresh style so that they are confident and ready to go back to school."
*Clutches pearls, earrings, necklaces, and bracelets*
And listen, I am absolutely not saying that Christy deserves any praise for doing hair. Anyone can. The point I'm trying to make is Christy is one-of-one. She has genuinely taken the time to learn her daughters. She really knows and understands her daughter's 4C hair.
In so many ways, hair can be a disparity, or a disconnect between so many interracial families and the black community understands that. We know the loneliness many little black girls feel even without that component, so to add in a provider that doesn't understand who you are, can be damaging long-term.
The fact that Christy properly pours into her babies (even with just something as simple as hair), tells us that these girls, even through their differences, are going to be so loved, listened to, and protected.
And at the end of the day, that's all we ask.
Watch the full video here:
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Featured image via Christy Gior/YouTube
Psychologist Debbie Sorensen explained to CNBC why women and millennials are experiencing burnout in higher numbers. “We haven’t had time to recover from the trauma of what we’ve been through the last few years,” she said. “Women and young people, in particular, are putting an immense amount of pressure on themselves to keep going, keep working, no matter the cost.”
As women, particularly Black women, we tend to carry the weight of the world on our shoulders. Other people's problems become our problems, and then we are expected to show up to work and show up for our family and friends with a smile on our faces. Whew, chile! What if we are having a bad day? How are we supposed to cope if we have to be everything to everyone? Well, here’s your sign to make time for yourself, especially on the days when you are feeling down.
Below is a list of self-care ideas for when you are having a bad day.
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Spend time in nature
Sometimes something as simple as surrounding yourself with trees, grass, and/ or water can improve your mood exponentially. The American Psychological Association’s (APA) research shows that spending time in nature can improve attention, lower stress, and reduce the risk of psychiatric disorders.
Got to a Spa
There’s nothing like going to a spa. You can relax in a sauna, get a massage, and just be. According to research, massages help release serotonin and dopamine, which are often referred to as “feel good” hormones, that will instantly perk you up and have you going about your day with a smile on your face.
Get Artsy
When was the last time you did arts and crafts? Drawing a picture, painting, or even coloring can help you discover your inner child, thus boosting your mood. Purchase an adult coloring book, or go to a paint-and-sip class by yourself, or you can make it a group activity and bring your besties.
Look your best
The old saying, “When you look good, you feel good,” didn’t just come out of thin air. There’s some truth to it. The Kentucky Counseling Center shared a link between self-care and feeling good. “Self-care regimens are extremely important not just to stabilize your day but to make you feel great. Simple things like getting a facial, taking care of your hair done, or exercising can make you confident because when you look good, you also feel good,” according to its website.
Dragana991/ Getty Images
Breathwork
There’s a reason why it is suggested that you breathe when you begin feeling overwhelmed and stressed out. Breathing brings oxygen back into your body, and WebMD reports that it can decrease the fight or flight response that happens when you are stressed.
Spend time with babies
I don’t know about you, but nothing makes me smile quicker than a baby, especially a smiling baby. If you’re the same way, then spending time with a baby or babies may help put you in a better mood, too.
Do nothing
Last but certainly not least, do nothing. There’s nothing like laying in your bed and not being forced to do anything. Stay in this moment and use this time to relax and replenish your energy.
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