Are you experiencing more breakage than usual? Are you wondering if you’ve overdone it on heat or color processing? Asking yourself these questions may indicate that your hair is high porosity. So what does that mean? Simply put, high porosity hair can take in moisture (which is a great thing). But it has difficulty retaining it because the cuticle is open and lifted—this is usually a result of damage from hair color and chemical treatments (think: relaxers, etc.).
So, what does this mean for your hair care routine? Well, your hair will need a dose of protein and moisture. Protein is excellent for rebuilding the hair cuticle; however, too much protein can mean crunchy, dry hair, so that is where moisture comes in. Some moisturizing ingredients to look for in your formulas are jojoba oil, shea butter, avocado oil, and mango butter.
Now that we’ve discussed some ingredients that are best for high porosity hair, here are a few products —many with nearly five-star reviews—that can help revive your hair.
Design Essentials Oat Protein & Henna Deep Cleansing Shampoo
Design Essentials
Healthy hair starts with shampoo. If your hair struggles to retain moisture, formulas with humectants that draw moisture in will be your hair care BFF. Formulated with oat protein and henna, this cleansing yet hydrating shampoo has a dynamic duo at the helm that increases hydration while strengthening the hair.
ApHogee Two-Step Protein Treatment
ApHogee
If you ask anyone what at-home protein treatment they are using, this one is likely high on the list. If you're experiencing breakage or are afraid you've overprocessed your hair with bleach or an overabundance of heat styling, this treatment should be helpful. Now, you have to follow the instructions to the letter because if you don't, you'll end up with dry hair. Additionally, because this two-step treatment is made of activated proteins and magnesium that are activated by heat, using this with a hooded dryer will yield the best benefits.
Briogeo Don't Despair Repair Rice Water Protein + Moisture Strengthening Treatment
Briogeo
For a protein treatment that takes a more natural approach, this weekly strengthening treatment boasting a nearly five-star review should be in your cart. Formulated with a cuticle-strengthening rice protein complex, this treatment will help bring your hair back to its best self.
Adwoa Beauty Baomint Deep Conditioning Treatment
Adwoa
When using proteins in your routine, moisture is equally as important. So we love that this beloved formula is made with nourishing superstar shea butter alongside fatty acid-rich prickly pear oil because it will work as the ultimate hydrator in tandem with products that help rebuild the hair cuticle.
MIELLE Avocado Moisturizing Hair Milk
MIELLE
For an extra dose of moisture, apply this aloe-, glycerin-, and avocado-infused hair milk to your hair before layering on your stylers. Because aloe and glycerin are humectants, this will help draw moisture into the hair well beyond your wash day.
Olaplex No. 3 Hair Repair Perfector
Olaplex
Don't sleep on pre-poo treatments. Since adding a pre-poo to my routine, I've seen a significant difference in the health of my ends which means length retention. Like the protein treatment listed above, to get the full benefits from this bond-building protector, be sure to follow the instructions by applying it to damp hair and leaving it on for at least 10 minutes before shampooing.
The Mane Choice Crystal Orchid Biotin Infused Styling Gel
The Mane Choice
Packed with biotin and vitamin D, this silicone-free gel defines curls, smooths frizz, and strengthens the hair. An added bonus: the formula is easily reactivated with water if you need to revive your curls throughout the week.
Featured image by Laylabird/Getty Images
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The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:
Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
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Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
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