In the 80's, Tina Knowles-Lawson gave birth to not one but two legendary superstars, and one thing is for damn sure: No one womb should have all that power. It's Father's Day weekend, meaning that tomorrow will be dedicated to showering dads with the love and appreciation that they rightfully deserve. Before we commence in this celebration of fatherhood, let's take the time to salute the mothers who help make it all happen.
While fathers protect, provide, and prepare their daughters for the real world, moms are there to offer emotional support and instill the tenacity we need to truly level up and become the Queens we were meant to be. Beyoncé, Solange, and Tina are a maternal trifecta that have not only created multiple streams of generational wealth, but left a legacy while they were at it.
Paras Griffin/Getty Images for 2016 Essence Festival
Last weekend at the Summit 21 conference in Atlanta, Mama Tina slid through with some clutch advice about how to raise an icon. According to the 65-year-old mother of two, her secret was having the ability to love her daughters separately and equally. She explained:
"One thing I'm really happy I did was I gave each of my kids a day. As Solange got older, I would spend Wednesdays with her and help with homework and do those types of things and just devote that day to her, and then one day to Bey."
Although money can buy a lot of things, one thing you don't have to pay for is quality time with your kids. While the media may make some believe that the formula for being a perfect mom rests in her bank account, Ms. Tina had another perspective. She continued:
"It makes them feel [good] you know? Because kids, no matter how much you give them love and attention, it's never enough. I mean I'm sure, everybody who has kids knows, you can take them to Astroworld, to eat, and they'll still say, 'Well what else we gon' do?'"
In a rare on-camera interview, Tina's eldest daughter, who we all affectionately know as Queen Bey, explained that her mother's time and attention did not go unnoticed. In fact, Beyoncé explained that her early exposure to Black art and entrepreneurship is the part of the secret behind her $300 million net worth, and it was all thanks to Mama T's bomb parenting.
"I think it was important to my mother to surround us with positive, powerful, strong images of African and African-American art so that we could reflect and see ourselves in them."
Beyoncé also told the publication that in a way, her latest role in the highly-anticipated live action Lion King film was a tribute to her mother's parenting. As much as Bey is excited to share the experience with Blue and the twins, she is even more elated to be able to share this achievement with her mom.
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Two weeks ago, Bey and her crew shut down the internet with their dope Lion King inspired attire at Ms. Tina's 3rd Annual Wearable Art Gala, a high-fashion soirée dedicated to art, fashion, and philanthropy, and Beyoncé said that this is only the beginning. She explained:
"My mother and Richard [Lawson, Tina's husband] believe that art is a representation of our history. Right now there's a shift, in these incredibly talented emerging black artists getting their due. I love so many great African-American artists, and I'm just so excited that these young black artists are getting their due. My mother has always been an entrepreneur, and she's taking that and teaching these young women that they can be entrepreneurs, exposing them to things that they would probably never see."
According to Beyoncé, part of Tina Lawson's success in being a dope mother, grandmother, and entrepreneur all at the same damn time is having a partner that can match her hustle.
"She dedicates her life to it, and she's found the perfect partner, Richard, who is just a kind, honest, beautiful human being who dedicates his life to the well-being of these kids. It's about the impact that you've had on this Earth."
To Tina Knowles-Lawson, her motto has always been purpose over paycheck. Tina reminds us that when you focus on your purpose, the paycheck won't be too far behind. Bey continued:
"My mother always believed that every person in this world has a purpose, and I think her gift is helping people realize their purpose a lot faster."
Featured image by Josh Brasted/Getty Images
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While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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Feature image by Leon Bennett/WireImage
Despite how much fun Sundays can be, once night hits and the fun is over, I tend to get a case of what I like to call the "Sunday Scaries." If you're unfamiliar with the phrase, the Sunday Scaries are the anxiety that sets in on Sunday nights with the impending return to the office, school, or work.
For many people, Sunday Scaries can disrupt you, impact your productivity and mood, and can cause chaos for the week ahead if you let it get the best of you. It doesn't matter what level you are in your career, or how high up the corporate ladder you are, the Sunday Scaries is a real thing and it's something that many of us experience. Recently, I was able to connect with a few successful women of color and they shared what their Sunday Scaries are and how they overcome them.
The “Never Ending To-Do List” Sunday Scary...
Kristina Willams, Founder & CEO of ZiM
Kristina Williams, Founder & CEO of ZiM
Courtesy of Kristina Williams
What She Said:
"At times I get overwhelmed when I think about all of the tasks I need to complete at once. I've had to learn to compartmentalize and to strategically plan my days in blocks.
"The first part of my day is for self-care, then comes emails. Next, I'm dedicated to completing any tasks my team needs from me before I head into my own daily tasks. I designate certain days of the week for meetings and try my best to stick to this schedule. I am naturally a big-picture thinker so creating visual charts, color coding, and having databases help to keep my brain focused, categorized, and linear.
"I have a tendency to get lost in my work so I've recently adopted the practice of planning for fun throughout my week as well. I aim to have at least one fun outing per week that allows my brain to decompress, build relationships and even gain inspiration from seemingly unrelated experiences. My tip for you would be to remember to design for joy, whether it's the colors you choose for your Post-Its, sharing a non-work-related hello to a team member, or planning your schedule with inserts of breathing time. Use your Sunday to remember you are in control of all of it, as much as it may seem overwhelming. Most importantly, remember to give yourself grace."
Yene Damtew, Salon Owner & Hair Educator
Yene Damtew, Salon Owner & Hair Educator
Courtesy of Yene Damtew
What She Said:
"Typically, my Monday errands make me nervous every Sunday. Being an entrepreneur requires you to wear a lot of hats and the only way to do that is to have structure. I am the queen of what I like to call 'TDL's' which stands for 'To-Do Lists', and I am old school in the fact that I prefer writing it down on paper rather than digitally as I get satisfaction on crossing the task out. I am a woman who likes to have a game plan and stay organized. I write everything down including my personal activities like workouts and self-care routines. It really helps calm my nerves.
"As a salon owner, traveling hairstylist, and educator, Mondays can include social media planning, stocking inventory at the salon, folding salon towels, laundry or repacking a suitcase for an upcoming trip. As long as I have it written down, almost anything seems possible to achieve."
The Sunday Scary That Actually Starts on Saturday
Aria Bell, PR Consultant at AT&T
Aria Bell, PR Consultant at AT&T
Courtesy of Aria Bell
What She Said:
"Honestly, I start getting the 'Sunday Scaries' on Saturdays.
"I tend to think about how the weekend will be ending the next day and hate that we don't have three full days. We all know Fridays don't count since we go into work on that day. Whenever these thoughts consume my mind, I ask myself, 'Why am I getting anxious when I've never failed at making it through every week no matter what?'
"Normally, what makes me anxious is thinking about my outfits for the week, my upcoming workload, and what I'll be eating (I try to be frugal with spending). I've found that picking outfits for the week on Sundays, or at least the night before, helps make my mornings run smoother. It also allows me the option to even stay in the bed an extra 15-20 minutes which is an absolute plus for me.
"As far as my heavy workload, I write out the most important tasks and/or goals I need to accomplish in order from most important to least. This helps me keep things aligned and prioritized throughout the week. Lastly, if there was ever a task that can save you time during the week, it would be meal prepping! Preparing and cooking my meals and snacks for the week effectively eliminates bad spending and eating habits. This task might seem intimidating, but you'll thank yourself during the week and keep some money in your pockets."
The Startup Founder Sunday Scaries...
Kendra James-Anderson, Virtual CFO
Kendra James-Anderson, Virtual CFO
Courtesy of Kendra James-Anderson
What She Said:
"My Sunday Scaries consists of thinking about my growing team and my growing client list. I tackle these Sunday Scaries in two main ways:
(1) I set no more than 1-2 high priority goals for the week.
(2) I dedicate Mondays exclusively to Team Meetings.
"I've found that having only 1-2 high priority goals for the week allows me (and my team) to all be focused on key objectives. Once you have an ever-growing to-do list of 50 random items, things feel overwhelming and impossible. Instead, I simply narrow that down to what really has to be done this week.
"I think about my business's overall monthly and quarterly objectives and create weekly goals based on that. Oftentimes, we include so many to-dos that don't even tie to our main objectives... so I use Sunday to get focused and outline those objectives. And then on Monday, I dedicate my time to holding team meetings. In the team meetings, I disperse those objectives to ensure that we are all on the same page. The Monday meetings really help set the tone for the week, and because I know what our company focus is for the week, I can properly lead my team.
"Sunday doesn't have to be scary if you utilize that time to find your focus for the upcoming week. My advice? Trash the 5-page to-do list and narrow your focus on the key objectives. It really helps your work feel more intentional and efficient and less erratic!"
Ashley Edwards, Founder & CEO of MindRight Health
Ashley Edwards, Founder & CEO of MindRight Health
Courtesy of Ashley Edwards
What She Said:
"My 'Sunday Scaries' are usually finance-related. As a small startup, I want to make sure everyone on our team consistently has all the resources they need to thrive. When I feel overwhelmed, I make a list of major stressors I may have in the week ahead - investor meetings, product deadlines, etc. - and then I make a list of all the things I can actually control. It's easy to feel stressed by all the things out of your control as you run a startup, so for me, it's important to remind myself of what I do have the power to change. I feel good as long as I know that each day I've done the best I could with what I have."
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Featured image courtesy of Kendra James-Anderson
Originally published February 10, 2020