Somaya Reece Reveals Her Weight Loss Strategy & The Breast Reduction That Changed Her Life
A few years ago, she quietly began undergoing a make-under. She toned down her style, changed her eating habits and then made headlines when she announced that she’d be undergoing a breast reduction. The results, revealed on her Instagram, were more than anyone could have ever imagined. Somaya spoke to us by phone from her LA home to talk about what she calls ‘the best decision she’s ever made’, and shared her diet plan for those who are interested in losing weight and getting fit.
Check out our interview below.
When did you first start the weight loss plan?I’d been trying to lose weight for a long time. I first started losing weight at the end of 2011.
This was your first battle with your weight, right?
I’ve been dealing with weight issues for years. I used to be really super thin. When I first started modeling, I had a team of sharks around me, who didn’t have my best interest in mind. I had an agency that told me I had drop a lot of weight.
So you’ve felt the outside pressures to be thin, for a while now?
[Back] When I was on my MySpace, people didn’t understand I was starving to be thin. I wasn’t eating. At one point I was a size 0, and I’m 5’10. I had a lot of really bad people advising me and I got sick. I collapsed on a set of a commercial. I was rushed to the hospital and treated for malnutrition and low iron. Finally the doctor told me, if I continued to not eat, I would die.
And that’s when you started gaining weight. How did that make you feel?It made me angry, and finally I just said if no one’s gonna love me as I am, then is this business really worth it. So I started eating normally and I got thick, which is how my body naturally is.
[easy-tweet tweet="Finally I said if no one’s gonna love me as I am, then is this business really worth it."]
So cut to years later, and you’re on Love & Hip Hop. Did you start to feel pressure to lose weight again?
It’s funny because I actually felt resistance to being thin. Now I had a team that kept telling me ‘thick is in’. And coming to New York was a big piece of it, being in LA it’s hard to stay in shape out here. You’re in a car all day. Working on the show, I was always doing stuff and the hustle is so fast paced, I was struggling to keep up. I had to switch up what I was doing.
Where did you start?
With my diet. My schedule was so crazy that I wasn’t eating, and then by the time I did eat, I would just grab anything. And finally I realized I wasn’t getting enough calories to lose weight. So I had to start becoming super strict about what I was eating, and how often. I started setting a schedule, making sure I ate every three hours, which is harder than you might think.
And did you change what you were eating?
Absolutely. I started eating clean. No fried foods, no junk food. Lots of vegetables, fruit, lean proteins. And I had to get a hold of portion sizes. I started drinking protein shakes, especially in the morning because I’m not big on breakfast.
What type of working out did you do?
I started working out 3-5 times a week. I was walking, climbing stairs, taking classes in the gym, when I’m in LA I hike, that’s like my thing. I do a lot of weight training, multiple reps with low weights. I’ll do two to three sets of an exercise using no more than 3-5 lbs weights. It helps build lean muscle. And that burns fat.
And this was your lifestyle, everyday?
I would allow myself a cheat day every once and a while, where I would eat something that I’d been craving. We’re talking maybe a donut or burrito. That was important, so I didn’t feel like I couldn’t have the things I loved.
How soon did you start seeing results?
Right away. But there was always the issue with my breasts. They always made me appear bigger than I really was.
Was that the leading reason you started considering the breast reduction?
There were a bunch of reasons. I’d always had a flat stomach, no matter how big I got. But you didn’t know it, because of my breasts. And I’d hear people talking about how my blazers never closed, or how they couldn’t take me seriously because my boobs were always out. But I couldn’t help it. And the scarring from bras, that’s real. And it hurts. They were just too big.
How did the people around you react when you told them you were considering the surgery?
My old management was against it. He insisted that I would lose my fan base. My family, especially my mother, was very supportive. She was the one that encouraged me to speak out about it. She said that my story might inspire someone else.
What was the public feedback?
I had this one guy tweet to me ‘If you cut off your boobs, I’m unfollowing you.’ But even though I got a lot of negative feedback like that, I also got A LOT of support. It’s overwhelming how much support I got from other women. So that let me know that I did the right thing by speaking out.
How was the recovery after the surgery?
The first week was the hardest. For a second I had to ask myself, did I really do the right thing? Its hard not being able to do anything for yourself. My sister had to bathe me. And that’s…a humiliating feeling. The pain wasn’t constant but when it did hit? It was terrible. There were a couple of times where I bumped myself and that was the worst. And I had to sleep sitting up for five weeks.
How do you feel now?
Now, I feel like it’s the best thing I could’ve ever done. I’m so much happier. I feel better. My back feels better. My clothes fit. I’m more comfortable. I don’t feel like I’m gawked at. And it’s totally changed my shape.
In total, how much weight have you lost?
I’ve lost a little over 20 lbs. But it’s all fat. And I’ve developed some long, lean muscle. I was more concerned with being healthy. I have energy now. I can keep up with my schedule. And I feel so much better about myself.
What is your new bra size?I went from a 40EE to a full D cup. I’m happy. The doctor told me they took about two pounds from each breast.
What’s next for you?
I’m continuing to work on my music. And I want to talk more about my weight loss and hopefully inspire others to reach their own goals.
Somaya shared with us her menu for a typical day. Catch it on the next page.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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A Therapist Breaks Down The Internet's Fixation On The Black Cat-Golden Retriever Dynamic
In the realm of love and relationships, there's a growing interest in the idea of opposites attracting. This concept is gaining traction on platforms like TikTok, where users explore how different personality types interact in romantic partnerships. One popular comparison is between the "golden retriever" and "black cat" archetypes.
According to Urban Dictionary, the golden retriever, typically portrayed by men, embodies a relaxed and friendly demeanor, making relationship maintenance seem effortless. These individuals are described as easygoing, patient, loyal, socially adept, and optimistic. On TikTok, many women are intrigued by the prospect of finding partners with these qualities.
In contrast, the black cat, often represented by women, leans towards introversion and independence. They're mysterious, quiet, and introspective, preferring to be pursued rather than doing "the chasing" in relationships.
@annakrstna Replying to @BeckyAmi part II coming soon❤️ #femmefatale #blackcat #blackcatenergy #dating #marriage #datingadvice #princesstreatment #feminine #feminineenergy #relationship #sprinklesprinkle #celebrity #femininenergy #love
This dichotomy reflects the anxious-avoidant attachment dynamics in psychology (pursuer-distancer cycle), where one partner seeks closeness (golden retriever) while the other values autonomy (black cat).
The Black Cat Golden Retriever Archetypes & Attachment Styles
Attachment theory suggests that early caregiving experiences shape our attachment styles, influencing how we relate to others. Anxious individuals seek reassurance, while avoidant individuals prioritize independence. However, not every instance of the black cat/golden retriever dynamic indicates underlying insecurities. Individuals can embody these personas without necessarily being insecure or exhibiting unhealthy attachment patterns.
For instance, a golden retriever's desire for closeness may come from a secure attachment style, rooted in self-worth and trust in others. Conversely, a black cat's preference for autonomy doesn't always indicate avoidance; they may simply value their independence, and it's relatively easy for them to connect and disconnect when needed. Understanding these dynamics requires personalized individual/couples assessment, ideally with a licensed therapist.
The Black Cat Golden Retriever Roles in Relationship Success
A prevailing notion in this discussion that's sparked a lot of conversation is the idea that when a woman takes on the role of the golden retriever in a relationship with a black cat partner, the dynamic is more likely to fail. (I've experienced this firsthand, even in my own past relationships, and I've seen it play out in my own life.) Conversely, when the roles are reversed, the relationship tends to thrive. But why does this happen?
Historically, men have been socialized to take on the role of the pursuer, while women are expected to be more passive recipients of romantic advances. From a biological standpoint, some researchers argue that evolutionary instincts may play a role in shaping mating behaviors. Evolutionary psychology suggests that men may be inclined to pursue potential mates to maximize their reproductive success. This perspective suggests that men may have evolved to seek out partners and compete for their attention and affection.
@annakrstna Replying to @Tina Kaur #love #dreamgirl #beauty #relationship #dating #datingadvice #femmefatale #feminineenergy #desire #obsession #darkpsychology #sprinklesprinkle #femininity #psychology #selflove
Additionally, societal expectations and cultural norms can heavily influence gender roles and relationship dynamics. From a young age, boys may be socialized to take initiative, assert themselves, and pursue their romantic interests actively. On the other hand, girls may be encouraged to adopt more passive roles, waiting for suitors to express interest or make romantic gestures.
As much as there's a lot of conversation about gendered expectations and societal norms, it's crucial to recognize that these expectations aren't universally applicable. Not all individuals adhere to traditional gender norms, and people express a wide array of behaviors and preferences in romantic relationships. Research indicates that attitudes towards pursuit and courtship have evolved over time and differ across cultures.
In today's society, there's a growing recognition of the significance of mutual consent, communication, and reciprocity in romantic relationships. Many individuals, irrespective of gender, prioritize egalitarian principles and seek partnerships founded on mutual respect, understanding, and collaborative decision-making.
The Black Cat & The Problem With 'Acting' Secure in Dating
Delving deeper, there's a growing conversation surrounding the distinction between acting secure and authentically embodying security in relationships. True security stems from a deep-rooted sense of self-assurance and a healthy understanding of one's needs and boundaries. Secure individuals don't feel compelled to mask their vulnerabilities or play games to attract a partner; they attract healthy relationships by being genuine and self-assured.
Contrastingly, attempting to mimic secure behavior without addressing underlying insecurities can lead to relational pitfalls. Pretending to be nonchalant or aloof may initially attract a partner, but it ultimately creates a façade that crumbles under the weight of emotional triggers and unresolved attachment wounds.
Authenticity and vulnerability form the bedrock of secure relationships, fostering trust and mutual understanding.
Most importantly, whether you identify as a black cat or a golden retriever in relationships, it's best to find someone who genuinely loves you for who you are. Connect with people who appreciate you instead of engaging in games or "acting secure," because even secure individuals have vulnerabilities and weaknesses. People need to see the real you to truly connect with you.
Transitioning from acting secure to being secure requires introspection and self-awareness. Here are some tangible tips to cultivate genuine security in relationships:
1. Reframe Your Beliefs About Love and Relationships:
Challenge any negative beliefs or misconceptions you may hold about love and relationships. Recognize that healthy relationships are built on mutual respect, trust, and compatibility, rather than scarcity or desperation.
Cultivate a mindset of abundance, believing that there are plenty of opportunities for meaningful connections and fulfilling partnerships; you just have to be the person you want to attract and refrain from entertaining anything less.
2. Develop Self-Confidence:
Invest in building your self-confidence and self-worth independent of external validation or romantic relationships. Foster a sense of independence and autonomy in your life. Develop interests, goals, and aspirations that are separate from your romantic relationships, and invest in your personal growth and development. Engage in activities and hobbies that bring you joy and fulfillment, and don’t abandon those hobbies just because you met someone new or you’re in a new relationship.
3. Set Realistic Expectations:
Avoid placing unrealistic expectations on yourself or your partner in relationships. Recognize that no relationship is perfect, and both partners will inevitably experience challenges and setbacks. Instead of striving for perfection, focus on building a strong foundation of mutual respect, understanding, and communication. Embrace the ups and downs of relationships as opportunities for growth and learning.
4. Emotional Regulation:
Develop healthy coping mechanisms for managing emotions and navigating conflict constructively. Prioritize self-care and cultivate resilience in the face of challenges.
5. Practice Patience and Acceptance:
Understand that finding a compatible partner and building a fulfilling relationship takes time and patience. Avoid rushing into relationships out of desperation or fear of being alone. Trust in the process and have faith that the right person will come into your life at the right time. Practice acceptance of yourself and others, recognizing that everyone has their own journey and timeline when it comes to love and relationships.
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Featured image by Amber N Ford/Getty Images