

Define The Bag You're Chasing Before It Defines You
I remember feeling like I won the lottery after receiving a job offer about two years ago.
Accepting it would mean I would be making well over $10,000 more than I was making at that moment, receiving bomb ass benefits including tuition reimbursement for my dream graduate school, and working for an institution that would give credibility out here in these corporate skreets. I thought the universe had heard my cries and prayers over the years where I worked jobs that I admit were pretty fun, purposeful, and life-altering but left me straining in the finance department.
Three months in, struggling to get out of bed in the morning and waking up with the anxiety that comes with a demanding corporate environment, I was facing a reality that comes from the failure to read the fine print. I realized God had indeed blessed me with a lesson early on in life that some have to wait a lifetime to learn:
Money is not the root of your happiness because nothing...I mean NOTHING outside of yourself can make you happy.
I admit I played deaf during my interview when they proudly exclaimed, "We have a high turnover rate at around 1-2 years," because as a recent graduate with more credit card debt and loans to pay off than I anticipated having, securing a job that would pay me the most money regardless of my role within it, seemed like the best option for me at the time.
I come to you humbled, urging you to be more specific with your prayers and to really determine what it is that you value the most in your everyday life. Is more money worth it at the expense of your work-life balance? Is pursuing a position with a generous vacation package really worth it if the demands of your job will basically prohibit you from reaping the fruits of your labor? Do amazing health benefits seem as attractive when you know that the stress of your position will weigh heavily on your health?
Before you chase the bag, define it.
I know that the bag that I am chasing is full of purpose, peace of mind, and the ability to use my natural talents to bring joy and hope to many while affording a comfortable lifestyle.
I propose that while carefully planning your next move to bigger and better career opportunities, that you learn how to find the value in your life and income now, so that when you receive career offers that seemingly will add to the bag, you can look at them with a clear-eyed view in reference to your purpose and your visions. Here are some questions to ask yourself for further clarity:
Does Money Burn In My Pocket?
When Kanye had some sense left, he uttered, "I have a problem with spending before I get it", and that is an issue that will lead to misfortune no matter how much you make. Overspending is more mental than derived out of actual necessity because most of the time after you run up your credit cards or burn through your check, you will find that you have little to show for it.
A great remedy to this is affirming that you see the value in your every day life, which means that you take a hard look of all that you have been blessed with presently and find the use of it. You have a fridge, a stove, a place to lay your head, and two working hands?! Instead of dining out, stay in and cook with friends or family. Instead of happy hour with the girls, invite them back for some homemade margaritas and mimosas. Fill your life with experiences that will create long-lasting positive feelings and memories more often, and you will learn the best things in life are free or at least super affordable!
Am I Spending Out Of Habit Or Out Of Necessity?
Does the thought of leaving your debit card at home on a mundane Tuesday sound like a nightmare? That can be a sign that you are doing more swiping during your downtime than what is healthy for your budget. 'No spend days' are the days of the week where outside of emergencies, your debit card should be safely tucked into your wallet. This is a great way to be intentional about your spending.
Just as social media fasts help clear your mind from the constant notifications of the virtual world, designating at least two days of no spending will show you how many times you reach for your card when it is plain old unnecessary. Just because it's on sale does not mean it's a sign from the universe for you to buy it. Just because you have a few bucks left from your paycheck from last week does not mean you need to spend it.
Is There A Way I Can Pay Myself Back?
When you change your attitude towards money from, "I can never have enough" to, "I have money everywhere, and it comes to me easily," just watch your circumstances change. There is actually a microsavings app called Digit, that will show you that even when you think you do not have a whole lot coming in, there is enough to stash away for something special. By looking at your spending habits, the app tucks away small increments as low as $.50 to as high as $10 at a time in a way that is painless and goes into a savings account that is out of sight and out of mind. If that is not your style, there are plenty of cards with a cash back bonus or a point system that allow you to accumulate air miles. Unfortunately, the freedom of adulthood comes with many expenses, so if you are going to spend it anyway, it is great to have some added perks.
Taking a serious look at your habits and thoughts about money will lead you to make better decisions when you get that raise or that higher paying position, and will remind you that there are parts of your life that are more valuable than how much you make. Let's start focusing on what we make of it.
Feature image by Getty Images.
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New Jersey native creating a life that she loves while living in gratitude. She loves using beauty, and fashion to create a balanced lifestyle while prioritizing wellness. A devoted fur mom, and a full-time lover of laughter. She is out for revenge against the darkness by being light, taking her own advice, traveling the world, and letting you know that you are so lit! Connect with her via IG @iamzaniah and please visit Zaniahsworld.com
Smile, Sis! These Five Improvements Can Upgrade Your Oral Hygiene Instantly
This article is in partnership with Sensodyne.
Our teeth are connected to so many things - our nutrition, our confidence, and our overall mood. We often take for granted how important healthy teeth are, until issues like tooth sensitivity or gum recession come to remind us. Like most things related to our bodies, prevention is the best medicine. Here are five things you can do immediately to improve your oral hygiene, prevent tooth sensitivity, and avoid dental issues down the road.
1) Go Easy On the Rough Brushing: Brushing your teeth is and always will be priority number one in the oral hygiene department. No surprises there! However, there is such a thing as applying too much pressure when brushing…and that can lead to problems over time. Use a toothbrush with soft bristles and brush in smooth, circular motions. It may seem counterintuitive, but a gentle approach to brushing is the most effective way to clean those pearly whites without wearing away enamel and exposing sensitive areas of the teeth.
2) Use A Desensitizing Toothpaste: As everyone knows, mouth pain can be highly uncomfortable; but tooth sensitivity is a whole different beast. Hot weather favorites like ice cream and popsicles have the ability to trigger tooth sensitivity, which might make you want to stay away from icy foods altogether. But as always, prevention is the best medicine here. Switching to a toothpaste like Sensodyne’s Sensitivity & Gum toothpaste specifically designed for sensitive teeth will help build a protective layer over sensitive areas of the tooth. Over time, those sharp sensations that occur with extremely cold foods will subside, and you’ll be back to treating yourself to your icy faves like this one!
3) Floss, Rinse, Brush. (And In That Order!): Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you do, but how you do it”? Well, the same thing applies to taking care of your teeth. Even if you are flossing and brushing religiously, you could be missing out on some of the benefits simply because you aren’t doing so in the right order. Flossing is best to do before brushing because it removes food particles and plaque from places your toothbrush can’t reach. After a proper flossing sesh, it is important to rinse out your mouth with water after. Finally, you can whip out your toothbrush and get to brushing. Though many of us commonly rinse with water after brushing to remove excess toothpaste, it may not be the best thing for our teeth. That’s because fluoride, the active ingredient in toothpaste that protects your enamel, works best when it gets to sit on the teeth and continue working its magic. Rinsing with water after brushing doesn’t let the toothpaste go to work like it really can. Changing up your order may take some getting used to, but over time, you’ll see the difference.
4) Stay Hydrated: Upping your water supply is a no-fail way to level up your health overall, and your teeth are no exception to this rule. Drinking water not only helps maintain a healthy pH balance in your mouth, but it also washes away residue and acids that can cause enamel erosion. It also helps you steer clear of dry mouth, which is a gateway to bad breath. And who needs that?
5) Show Your Gums Some Love: When it comes to improving your smile, you may be laser-focused on getting your teeth whiter, straighter, and overall healthier. Rightfully so, as these are all attributes of a megawatt smile; but you certainly don’t want to leave gum health out of the equation. If you neglect your gums, you’ll start to notice the effects of plaque buildup, which can irritate the gums and cause gingivitis, the earliest stage of gum disease. Seeing blood while brushing and flossing is a tell-tale sign that your gums are suffering. You may also experience gum recession — a condition where the gum tissue surrounding your teeth pulls back, exposing more of your tooth. Brushing at least twice a day with a gum-protecting toothpaste like Sensodyne Sensitivity and Gum, coupled with regular dentist visits, will keep your gums shining as bright as those pearly whites.
Why Do Millennials & Gen-Zers Still Feel Like Teenagers? The Pandemic Might Be The Reason.
There’s nothing quite as humbling as navigating adulthood with no instruction manual. Since the turn of the decade, it seems like everything in our society that could go wrong has, inevitably, gone wrong. From the global pandemic, our crippling student debt problem, the loneliness crisis, layoffs, global warming, recession, and not to mention figuring out what to eat for dinner every night. This constant state of uncertainty has many of us wondering, when are the grown-ups coming to fix all of this?
But the catch is, we are the new grown-ups.
As if it happened without our permission, we became the new adults. We are the members of society who are paying taxes, having children, getting married, and keeping our communities afloat, one iced latte at a time. Still, there’s something about doing all these grown-up duties that feel unnaturally grown-up. Enter the #teenagegirlinher20s.
If there’s one hashtag to give you the state of the next cohort of adults, it’s this one. Of the videos that have garnered over 3.9M views, you’ll find a collection of users who are overwhelmed by life’s pressing existential responsibilities, clung to nostalgia, and reminiscent of the days when their mom and dad took care of their insurance plans.
@charlies444ngel no like i cant explain to her why i had to buy multiple tank air dupes from aritzia #teenagegirlinher20s #fyp
The concept of being a 20-something or 30-something teenager is linked to the sentiment of not feeling “grown up enough” to do grown-up things while feeling underprepared and even nihilistic about whether that preparation even matters.
It’s our generation’s version of when we ask our grandmothers how old they are and they simply reply with, “I still feel 45,” all while being every bit of 76 years old. In this, we share a warped concept of time while clinging to a desire for infantilization.
Granted, the pandemic did a number on our concept of time. Many of us who started the pandemic in our early or mid-20s missed out on three fundamental years of socialization, career development, and personal milestones that traditionally help to mark our growth.
Our time to figure out and plan our next steps through fumbling yet active participation was put on pause indefinitely and then resumed provisionally. This in turn has left many of us hanging in the balance of uncertainty as we try to make sense of the disconnect between our minds and bodies in this missing gap of time.
Because we’re all still figuring out what the ramifications of being locked away and frozen in time by a global pandemic will have on us as a society, there really is no “right” way of making up for lost time. Feeling unprepared for any new chapter of life is a natural rite of passage, pandemic or not. However, it’s important to not stay stuck in the last age or period of life that made sense to us because self-growth is the truest evidence of personal progress.
So whether you’re leaning on your inner child, teenager, or 20-something for guidance as you fill the gap between your real age and pandemic age, know that it’s okay to grieve the person you thought you would be and the milestones you thought you’d hit before you ever knew what a pandemic was. If there’s anything that the pandemic taught us, it’s that we have the power to reimagine a better world and life for ourselves. And if we tap into our inner teenager as a compass, we can piece together our next chapter with a fresh outlook.
Sure, we’ve lost a couple of years, but there are still some really amazing ones ahead.
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Featured image by Stephen Zeigler/Getty Images