One of my favorite books, The Four Agreements, offers a rule that I try to live by: Don't make assumptions. Although I try to live by that mantra, it's hard out here for a cynic.
As much as we all hate stereotypes, there are a few generalizations about men that have come to be law for some women. Like, men aren't as emotional as women and don't enjoy talking about their feelings. Men fear commitment and loathe marriage. Men think about nothing but sex. Okay, maybe that last one is just me, but these are ideologies that we blindly accept as truth could be keeping us from really understanding what men really want.
In an effort to put an end to these assumptions and seek out big facts, xoNecole caught up with some of our favorite celebrities at the Atlanta Tastemaker Screening of What Men Want to debunk some of the common misconceptions that women have about men.
What Do Men Want? www.youtube.com
Here's what they had to say:
Misconception: All Men Want Is Sex.
My mama told me because her mama told her: Men only want one thing. But Trina Braxton shared with us that she thinks physical intimacy is only one of the things that men truly want from a woman.
"I think that the biggest misconception that women have when it comes to men is that all they want is sex. I think a lot of other things they want is companionship and I think they want to be caressed and loved and pampered just as much as women do."
Misconception: All Men Cheat
Infidelity is an issue that I'm sure 98.99% of women have encountered at least once in their lifetime. So much so that cheating seems normalized and even men who aren't unfaithful get the heat of the backlash. B. Simone reminds us to keep the faith in finding a loyal partner because although no man is perfect, not all men cheat:
"I don't believe all men cheat. I believe, you know, they make mistakes sometimes and there are a lot of cheaters out there, but there's also a lot of faithful men. I do not think all men cheat."
Misconception: Men Don't Know How To Communicate
Men are from Mars and women are from Venus. When I was younger, I didn't understand that phrase. As an adult, it's the only logical way I can explain the chronic miscommunication issues between men and women. One of the most recurring complaints about men is their lack of empathy or understanding, but Demetria says the magic could be in changing your approach.
"If we just say what we want without being a little bit ratchet like I tend to be, then I think we'll get a little bit better results."
So what do men really want?
As hard as it is, we have to put an end to making assumptions about who a man is and find out firsthand. Although they are a strange and very different species, men also need love and security to truly feel whole. Taraji P. Henson told xoNecole:
"I think all humans want security when it comes to relationships. They want unconditional love. They want a mother's love, that's what everybody wants."
Featured image by B. Simone/Galore.