Your Guide To Practicing Intuitive Eating
When did we lose the joy of eating our favorite meals? With so many diets, food trends, and programs out there, it can put unwanted restrictions on our eating habits that cause more harm than good. And when we take a deeper look at diet culture, there’s a running theme of “denying” ourselves the foods that we enjoy in order to achieve a fixed body goal or physique. However, one framework of eating is encouraging foodies to listen to their body’s hunger cues as opposed to suppressing them.
The term "intuitive eating" was coined by two registered dietitians, Evelyn Tribole, RD, and Elyse Resch, RDN, in the 1990s, who developed and published the concept in the book Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Program That Works. In this food guide, they introduced the principles of intuitive eating as an alternative approach to traditional diets and restrictive eating patterns.
Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch recognized that many individuals were trapped in a cycle of dieting, which often led to disordered eating behaviors and a negative relationship with food and their bodies. In order to correct this cycle, they both created a more compassionate and sustainable approach to nutrition and self-care.
At its core, intuitive eating emphasizes the importance of reconnecting with internal hunger and fullness cues, which in itself challenges the traditional dieting mindset and fosters a positive body and self-image.
When we trust our bodies' innate ability to regulate food intake, we heal our relationship with food and trust our inner voice when it reached a point of satisfaction. Where traditional diet culture tells us to be at the mercy of our food, intuitive eating put the power back in our hands — and body — to say “when” at the right moment.
Those who have adopted this form of eating have found that they’ve been able to listen to their bodies on a deeper level to eat when they’re hungry and stop when they’re comfortably full. When you eat mindfully, you allow yourself to be present during each meal, savor each bite, and respect your cravings. Although this does take time and practice, you’ll find that over time, you’re giving yourself permission to eat foods you enjoy without the guilt.
While you can approach intuitive eating on your own through mindfulness and naturally listening to your body, Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch created an outline of 10 principles to guide individuals toward a healthier and more intuitive approach to eating and self-care so you don’t have to go on the journey alone.
- Reject the diet mentality: Let go of the dieting mindset and the belief in "good" and "bad" foods and embrace a more balanced and flexible approach to eating.
- Honor your hunger: Listen to your body's hunger signals and respond to them by providing nourishment when you feel hungry and give yourself permission to enjoy the foods that delight you.
- Make peace with food: Give yourself permission to eat all types of foods without guilt or judgment. Avoid restricting yourself from certain foods, as this can lead to unhealthy relationships with those foods.
- Challenge the food police: Challenge and reject the negative thoughts and the inner critic that may arise around food choices. Reframe your thinking about food in a more positive and compassionate way.
- Discover the satisfaction factor: Enjoy your food and savor each bite. Pay attention to the tastes and textures, and find pleasure in eating.
- Feel your fullness: Tune in to your body's fullness cues and stop eating when you feel comfortably satisfied, rather than overeating or restricting.
- Cope with your emotions without using food: Find alternative ways to deal with emotions and stress that don't involve using food as a coping mechanism.
- Respect your body: Accept and appreciate your body for its unique shape, size, and abilities. Let go of unrealistic body ideals and focus on self-care and overall well-being.
- Exercise: Engage in physical activity that feels enjoyable and energizing rather than punishing yourself with exercise to compensate for eating.
- Honor your health with gentle nutrition: Make food choices that support your overall well-being while also being mindful that no single meal or snack determines your health. Aim for balance and variety in your food choices.
Intuitive eating is about establishing a positive relationship with food and your body, as opposed to following a strict, linear diet plan. Trusting your body's signals, preferences, and needs is a journey of self-discovery but when you embrace it with patience and self-compassion you’ll, in turn, ditch the idea of labeling foods as "good" or "bad" and enjoying the balance, nourishment, and that food can offer.
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Aley Arion is a writer and digital storyteller from the South, currently living in sunny Los Angeles. Her site, yagirlaley.com, serves as a digital diary to document personal essays, cultural commentary, and her insights into the Black Millennial experience. Follow her at @yagirlaley on all platforms!
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
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THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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When discussing the topic of raising children, discipline is often the first thing that comes to mind. Children need discipline. Full stop. But what is discipline? And how do we draw the line between discipline and revenge?
The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:
Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
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Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
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