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Monica Schipper/Getty Images for Amazon Studios

Meagan Good On The Healing Process Divorce Has Taken Her Through

Taking the high road doesn't mean it hurts any less.

Meagan Good

Over the weekend, xoNecole held a Twitter Spaces conversation with the cast of Harlem which included the show’s stars Meagan Good, Grace Byers, and Shoniqua Shandai. Host Gia Peppers facilitated the conversation as the ladies dished on topics such as goal-setting, love, and of course unforgettable moments from the hit Amazon Prime show.


The hour-long discussion also involved the cast members sharing their vulnerability with the audience such as Meagan opening up about her divorce from DeVon Franklin. The week before Christmas in 2021, Meagan and DeVon shocked everyone after news surfaced that they were divorcing after 11 years.

They also wrote loving Instagram posts to each other on their individual Instagram pages following the news of their breakup. In the post, they claimed that “there’s no one at fault” for the demise of their relationship and that they are “forever connected.”

But while they both seem to be taking the high road, that doesn’t mean that it hurts any less. The Harlem actress opened up about relationships and how her divorce has affected her exclusively to xoNecole.

“Throughout life, I’ve always approached relationships as understanding that at some point, they’ll get to the place that they’re going to, and then they would be over,” she said. “I’ve always had an attitude of like, 'Alright, next chapter. We’ll see what’s next,' and being okay with that and appreciating what you give to someone and what they give to you and sharing a moment in time and in life that you never get back regardless of how it ends.”

However, she hasn’t been able to have that same attitude about her divorce. “In my situation right now, it’s a little bit different because I thought that that would be the last time that I would be doing that and that I would be doing this with that person forever.”

She called her divorce from DeVon “the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced in my life” and while she’s been in the process since August of 2021, she’s still optimistic about what else life has to offer. “I am still optimistic. I still am hopeful for the future. I still—maybe this isn’t a chapter, but I just feel that it’s my next act in life and I trust God.”

“Not everything makes sense to me right now, but I do trust God overall and I’m excited to see what this next act of life is going to be and what God has in store and that’s all I can really do but even in doing that, I do have gratitude and so much joy in my heart for these past 11 years that DeVon and I have been together. What he’s given into my life and what I was able to give to him, just everything.”

She added, “Every season, every single part of it has been incredible. But I think it’s important for every relationship to know that it’s really about perspective and it really is how you perceive and look at things and trust in God in the process no matter what it is.”

The 40-year-old beauty does acknowledge that while she is hopeful for the future, she is still “grieving” her divorce.

“Still grieving, still hurt. It’s going to be a long time, but at the end of the day it has made God, even more, my lover and even more my husband, and even brought our relationship to new depths and new heights so I’m in gratitude for that.”

Meagan does have a lot to look forward to in the future. Her show Harlem is a huge hit and she’s also been making moves behind the camera as a director. We can’t wait to see what’s next for the beloved actress.

To listen to the Twitter Spaces conversation hosted by xoNecole in full, click here.

Featured image by Monica Schipper/Getty Images for Amazon Studios

When I was ten, my Sunday school teacher put on a brief performance in class that included some of the boys standing in front of the classroom while she stood in front of them holding a heart shaped box of chocolate. One by one, she tells each boy to come and bite a piece of candy and then place the remainder back into the box. After the last boy, she gave the box of now mangled chocolate over to the other Sunday school teacher — who happened to be her real husband — who made a comically puzzled face. She told us that the lesson to be gleaned from this was that if you give your heart away to too many people, once you find “the one,” that your heart would be too damaged. The lesson wasn’t explicitly about sex but the implication was clearly present.

That memory came back to me after a flier went viral last week, advertising an abstinence event titled The Close Your Legs Tour with the specific target demo of teen girls came across my Twitter timeline. The event was met with derision online. Writer, artist, and professor Ashon Crawley said: “We have to refuse shame. it is not yours to hold. legs open or not.” Writer and theologian Candice Marie Benbow said on her Twitter: “Any event where 12-17-year-old girls are being told to ‘keep their legs closed’ is a space where purity culture is being reinforced.”

“Purity culture,” as Benbow referenced, is a culture that teaches primarily girls and women that their value is to be found in their ability to stay chaste and “pure”–as in, non-sexual–for both God and their future husbands.

I grew up in an explicitly evangelical house and church, where I was taught virginity was the best gift a girl can hold on to until she got married. I fortunately never wore a purity ring or had a ceremony where I promised my father I wouldn’t have pre-marital sex. I certainly never even thought of having my hymen examined and the certificate handed over to my father on my wedding day as “proof” that I kept my promise. But the culture was always present. A few years after that chocolate-flavored indoctrination, I was introduced to the fabled car anecdote. “Boys don’t like girls who have been test-driven,” as it goes.

And I believed it for a long time. That to be loved and to be desired by men, it was only right for me to deny myself my own basic human desires, in the hopes of one day meeting a man that would fill all of my fantasies — romantically and sexually. Even if it meant denying my queerness, or even if it meant ignoring how being the only Black and fat girl in a predominantly white Christian space often had me watch all the white girls have their first boyfriends while I didn’t. Something they don’t tell you about purity culture – and that it took me years to learn and unlearn myself – is that there are bodies that are deemed inherently sinful and vulgar. That purity is about the desire to see girls and women shrink themselves, make themselves meek for men.

Purity culture isn’t unlike rape culture which tells young girls in so many ways that their worth can only be found through their bodies. Whether it be through promiscuity or chastity, young girls are instructed on what to do with their bodies before they’ve had time to figure themselves out, separate from a patriarchal lens. That their needs are secondary to that of the men and boys in their lives.

It took me a while —after leaving the church and unlearning the toxic ideals around purity culture rooted in anti-Blackness, fatphobia, heteropatriarchy, and queerphobia — to embrace my body, my sexuality, and my queerness as something that was not only not sinful or dirty, but actually in line with the vision God has over my life. Our bodies don't stop being our temples depending on who we do or who we don’t let in, and our worth isn’t dependent on the width of our legs at any given point.

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