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Mary J. Blige Is Single By Choice, Not By Chance: "I'm Just Focused"

"I don't have to make the same mistakes over and over again. I don't have to suffer the way I've done."

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Dating is a full-time job, one that I should have put my two weeks' notice in about two weeks ago. Along with the pressures of being financially independent, building a career, and trying to live a healthy lifestyle, dating is the last thing on my list, and according to Mary J. Blige, she has that same energy.

After a tumultuous divorce with her ex-husband, Kendu Issacs robbed her of her trust and even swiped quite a few coins from her bank account, the "Not Gon Cry" singer says that she using this phase of her life to focus on her damn self. Ma said that while her experiences may have bruised her, they didn't break her. In an interview with The New York Post, she said:

"It's taken a big toll, and it's taken a big chunk out of my life, but I don't want that to be the message I send to these women. I want it to be like, 'We can move on. We can let things go so we can move forward in our life.' I'm definitely in a stronger place."

Now, only a year after finalizing her divorce, Mary says she's rediscovering herself in a whole new way and judging from the 48-year-old singer's Instagram, she's doing better than fine, auntie is doing damn good. Along with her nationwide tour with Nas kicking off this year, it was also announced that Mary will star in the Power sequel and produce a new series on TNT that details the life of OG Philly drug kingpin, Thelma Wright.

According to Mary, the key to her newfound freedom is taking the time to really be free:

"I'm not dating at all. I'm not dating by choice. I'm just focused, man. I got things to do. I'm trying to just continue to build and build and structure so that when I do turn 50, things can be different."

Albert Einstein is often credited for saying insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results, but that's untrue; we have no clue if Einstein actually said that. But what we do know is that you can never get something new if you never do something new. That's exactly why Mary has officially decided to take a leave of absence from the dating game:

"I don't have to make the same mistakes over and over again. I don't have to suffer the way I've done."

While Mary has decided to remove her dating card from the deck, in the past, the entertainer said that if and when she is ever looking to become the queen of anyone's heart, he has to have a bag secured, first. She explained:

"He has to have more money than me, that's for sure, because I'm not taking care of any more men."

Read Mary's full interview here!

Featured image by Kathy Hutchins / Shutterstock.com

You know what? Sometimes, you've got to push a few coins aside and determine in your mind that you're going to invest into your sex life (if you had a sex jar, this would be easier to do, by the way. You can read more about what that is all about here). If you're someone who is totally down to do that, but you don't have a clue where to begin, boy have you come to the right place! Between the joy of being a writer who sometimes gets samples sent to me, the constant research that I do for the couples I work with and having folks shout-out certain items semi-often, I've compiled a list of 12 sex-related items that may seem random AF (a pun is kind of intended there) and, at the same time, can make sex so much better between you and your partner. Where's your pad at? You're definitely gonna wanna take note.

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