Teyana Taylor and Iman Shumpert have had their share of publicity involving their relationship, but that doesn't keep them from going as strong as ever. Iman recently showed up at The Breakfast Club to address rumors that arose during the Pusha T and Drake debacle about Iman's alleged relationship about with with adult star and painter Sophie Brussaux.
Little did he know, his wifey's pull-up game was strong. Teyana surprised him a few minutes into the interview to set the record straight about untrue tabloid rumors.
"Mind you half of these rumors come from his f****d up past, even with the other rumors and s***, it's all these old a** pictures, That n*** would've been dead, I got his location and everything."
They both confirmed that the infidelity rumors were false. The previous day, Iman appeared on Angela Yee's Lip Service and mentioned that he offered Teyana full disclosure. Iman said that he had provided Teyana with a "hit list" of women he had been with so that there would be no surprises if rumors arose from past relationships. He said:
"Before any of this, I been had to give Teyana this list, I had to. She can't feel embarrassed ever, I ain't gonna have her feel embarrassed."
Iman has a point.
The painful truth exists that your boo had sexual experiences before they were with you. As cringeworthy as it is to talk about, it's the naked truth that your man got naked with someone else. The underlying question is, should you and your partner disclose your sexual histories with one another? And if so, at what point in the relationship is this conversation necessary?
Although it may be pretty uncomfortable to discuss the one night stands and sometimes shameful experiences that you shared with individuals who have no relevance to your current relationship, it must be done.
In today's social climate, it seems irrational for a woman to demand such invasive information about a man's sexual history, but I'm with Teyana, you're not about to have me out here looking crazy. Social media makes relationships more accessible than ever before, especially for celebrities. This makes it easy for people to develop rumors based on unsubstantiated information. I see it as completely necessary to disclose your former partners when entering into a mutually exclusive relationship.
On the other hand, there is the issue of confidentiality. The concept of having a 'body count' is actually fairly misogynistic. By asking a man to offer me a list of his conquests, I'm violating the privacy of any of the women that he's been with. I don't feel like someone I laid down with at any point my life should discuss our sexual experiences with anyone else, especially if it's not his wife.
The idea of offering your partner a 'hit list' is a tricky subject, but is definitely an important conversation to have with your partner if things are getting serious. The last thing you or your partner want is to be blindsided about their own relationship.
What do you think? Is a hit list from your man essential to maintaining a healthy relationship? Or do you feel like what's in the past should stay there? Let us know in the comments!
Featured image by Danielle Venturelli/amfAR/Getty Images for amfAR
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To help you better understand why this was such a mental awakening for me, I first need to give a bit of my backstory. I’m in my late thirties. I’m an attorneyand a journalist. I own a home and have traveled the world extensively. Essentially, I’ve done everything in life I set out to do. However, when it comes to dating, I struggle. Not because there is anything wrong with me per se, but because my career and “lifestyle” often create problems in my romantic relationships.
View from my hotel room
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I’ve been told everything from, ‘I can’t continue to date you because you seem to choose your career over wanting to settle down and have kids’ by a man after only the second date to ‘Maybe if you just sat down somewhere for a while, I’d actually wife you’ by someone who has honestly never proven themselves to be the settle down type. And these are only a handful of the things I’ve been told over the years.
It’s been frustrating, to say the least, and there have even been seasons where I purposely dimmed my light in hopes that my career wouldn’t push away potential suitors. I know what you’re thinking, “Girl, why would you even consider that? If they’re for you, it won’t matter what you do.” Hey, don’t judge me, but also, I one hundred percent agree.
My hotel bathroom
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That’s why this recent moment in Switzerland was right on time. When I first walked into the hotel to check in, I was blown away by the surrounding beauty. It was a five-star property with one of the world’s most famous thermal bathhouses. Yet, it was something about seeing that 90% of the hotel’s guests were couples, that forced me to sit back for a bit of introspection—while soaking in the thermal spa, of course.
As I went through the mental conversation, there was a battle of sorts. On one hand, I knew that being able to partake in experiences like the one I was having at that moment was important to me. I knew that, at times I actually love being able to dabble in the finer things—after all, I’ve worked hard to be able to afford them. On the other hand, and sadly, I knew that sometimes being a single Black woman that publicly showcases her “luxurious” habits can intimidate men and even scare them off from pursuing you under the guise of them feeling like they “can’t do anything for you, because you have everything.”
My hotel room
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So, what is a girl to do?
Do I minimize/hide the life and experiences that I have? Do I play down the hard work I’ve put in to get where I am professionally? Or, do I risk being single in exchange for being able to have said life, without backlash?
Luckily, the joy that I felt while being at this property won. There was something about taking a full day to simply pamper myself at the bathhouse and in my in-room steam shower and soaker tub, indulging in cuisine from a 2-star Michelin restaurant and doing all of this while surrounded by an amazing group of Black women that reminded me—this is certainly the life I was meant to live and that I deserve. Even if it means that right now, I’ll just have to provide it for myself until the right partner comes along. And honestly, I’m okay with that.
Restaurant at 7132 hotel
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