

For me, a great first date question is, "What sign are you?" I have dodged many a bullet by asking this question. I would say that I am 99 percent on the dot when it comes to predicting potential relationship drama just by assessing someone's sign and paying attention to their actions. However, I do realize I may have missed a few things and that has caused me to look a little deeper. I am notorious for asking my potential date what their time of birth is and where they were born. Why? Well, it is simple, I need to know what's in that birth chart.
Are we truly compatible or is this just a brief moment of coincidence? Most people, especially men, don't normally have this information on hand. To that, I reply, "Text your mom and see if she remembers." It may seem, and it probably is, a bit invasive but the way dating is set up these days, I need to collect as much information upfront.
Apps like Co-Star and The Pattern App have made it simple and easy to have this information at your fingertips. It allows you to see, astrologically, how you match up with friends, co-workers, family, and yes, potential boos, just by entering in a few details. Many people swear by these apps because of their uncanny ability to give you daily predictions that are spot-on.
Birth charts and zodiac signs are not new tools that have been used in the dating arena, on the recent popular Netflix series, Indian Matchmaker, we got a chance to see how big of a role in Indian cultures astrology played in picking a spouse. Honestly, it was very eye-opening. But this is all to say that birth charts can lend a lot of guidance to you and be useful in a self-discovery kind of way.
In order to delve in deeper into the topic of astrology charts, we spoke with Angelica Ray, an Intuitive, Healer, and Coach to shed light on all things there are to know about birth charts.
What Is A Birth Chart & What Does A Birth Chart Mean?
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Natal charts, commonly known as birth charts, are a chart that explains where the planets were in the sky at the date and time you were born. "A birth chart or a natal chart is essentially a snapshot of the sky, the cosmos, the planets at the exact moment you were born. So as the Earth turns, and depending upon where you were born and the time you were born, the space around Earth looks a particular way," Angelica explained to xoNecole.
"The planets, stars, moons are in particular positions based on those factors. And that position and that snapshot in time are what is known as our birth chart."
Every planet has a significant meaning as it applies to you and how you show up in the world. Your birth chart helps to highlight where the planets were located at your birth and the significance in that particular placement. Our complete personalities are made up of several personality traits of different zodiac signs that represent different areas of our lives. Each birth chart is fairly unique to the individual unless there was another person born at the same time, on the same date, in the same location as you. According to a Nylon.com article:
"Your personal planets — such as the moon, Venus, rising, Mercury, and Mars — can change signs every few hours to days, which is why your chart would look very different from someone born just a few days later."
Planets such as Pluto, Uranus, and Neptune on the other hand are very slow-changing signs that change every few years or so. These planets reflect things like generational shifts and traits that will be similar to people in the same age brackets.
How Do I Find My Birth Chart?
There are many different ways you can access your birth chart. Angelica says before you access your birth chart, you need to make sure you have a few things for accuracy. "You can get access to your birth chart through several different websites. There is one called Astro Dienst which in my opinion is the best astrology website for getting birth charts. While the chart itself is very helpful, it is also a great idea to get your birth chart from an astrologer who has a full understanding of the chart itself the placements, the transitions, and transits, so that you can have as much information as possible."
It is suggested with the time of birth to get it as close as possible to the minute you were born. You can still access your birth chart without it, but it is critical to have the exact time. The apps Co-Star, The Pattern, Astrology Zone, and Time Nomads are highly recommended for getting your birth chart.
How To Read Your Birth Chart
Reading your birth chart can be a little tedious. There are specific intricacies that the different planets create by playing off each other in certain positions. It may serve you best to find someone who knows how to read your birth chart for you and interpret all the relationships and meanings. Angelica advised, "The field is obviously not regulated, there are a lot of people claiming to be astrologers. Of course, there are people with less deep knowledge of astrology who can still provide you with information that can be helpful. If you want a really deep dive and to know all of the intricacies, then you would want to look for someone who has that specialization and who has been studying astrology for a long time and who makes it a priority and focus in their profession."
How To Interpret & Understand Your Birth Chart For Yourself
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Now that we know what the birth chart is and how to access one, let's discuss how it can help you understand yourself. A lot of the conversation around what people know about astrology and the zodiac is very one-dimensional. The birth chart gives you a deeper understanding of how people perceive you, how you navigate deeper emotions, how you love, how you communicate, etc. Angelica explained, "I always say the birth chart can tell you the skeleton of a person. The flesh of a person is all the experiences they've had. It's their values, their morals, etc. But your birth chart really does tell you the skeleton of a person. It is the structure of how you are made up and what energy has created you."
Once you understand the fundamentals through the birth chart, you can start to explore the more nuanced aspects of yourself. "It's really helpful to know because it can provide a lot of confirmation and affirmation of things you maybe sensed about yourself but didn't have anything, in particular, to point to. A lot of us are aware of our sun sign but that's like saying you know a face just by its nose. But you need to see the entirety of the faces just to have some sort of recognition to have some sort of familiarity and some understanding."
Angelica continued, "While the sun sign does provide you with a little bit of information, it's really how it works in tandem and conjunction with all of the other intricacies of the chart that make the information usable in your everyday life."
Understanding The Primal Triad: The Sun, The Moon, & The Rising Signs
The primal triad to me is the meat and potatoes for where everyone should begin with birth charts. The primal triad includes your sun sign, moon sign, and rising or ascendant sign. "These three elements really help you to understand the primal nature of the soul of a person," Angelica said.
However, let's look at the breakdown of each of the signs making up the primal triad from, as told by Angelica Ray:
- "The sun sign is typically the way a person shines their light in the world. It is their essence, it is how they 'do' the world most naturally.
- "The rising sign is sometimes called the ascendant sign. The ascendant sign typically represents how other people experience you in the world. So it is that first layer, that aura or experience they have with you. Imagine if your sun sign is the light, then your ascendant sign is the window through which that light shines. If it is a blue window, you might have a different tint of light on it than you would if it was a purple window. So your sun is the light that is shining and your ascendent is the light coming through the window and represents how people experience you.
- "Your moon sign is the deepest part of you emotionally, psychically and that is all the stuff you bury and you carry deep inside. It is how you 'do' your emotional world."
Birth charts are an interesting way to compare and contrast how you interact with yourself and others. But it is extremely important to gain as much insight as possible when starting this research to be accurate. Angelica offered this sage advice, "A birth chart is a tool. Fate and free will are constantly in interplay with one another. So while astrology might point to the lesson you are here to learn and things you should come here to do in this lifetime, you still have free will to choose how you are going to do those things and how that might play out."
She concluded, "It just tells you what energy you are made of and it is the choices that you make that allow you the opportunity to work in harmony or in disharmony with that energy."
If you would like to know more about birth charts or to book an appointment for services with Angelica Ray, please visit her website. She also can be found @angelicaray on Instagram.
Featured image by Shutterstock
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'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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How Power Women Protect Their Finances With Smart Money Boundaries
No matter what it is, setting boundaries can be challenging, especially when those boundaries involve money. But if you want to sustain success and financial freedom, boundaries are important, both with yourself and with others.
Many wealthy successful women have mastered setting boundaries and prioritizing accountability so that they can ensure they remain that way. Let's face it: If you want a certain quality of life and you work hard to achieve that, you don't want to risk it by taking on habits that jeopardize your financial stability.
Be inspired to not only set money boundaries but keep them by taking heed to the common financial boundaries power women of today establish:
1. They pay themselves first.
Building consistent savings habits is important to wealth-building no matter how much you earn, and the practice is often one that continues even after you're well-booked and well-paid. Actress, producer, and philanthropist Queen Latifah has always been a proponent of this after learning from her mom to "save your money."
This is the epitome of the energy behind paying yourself first. You squirrel something away and take care of yourself by taking care of your future first, before paying any bills. You invest in yourself (within your means and with a budget in mind, of course).
2. They don't loan money without clear repayment rules and expectations are agreed upon.
It's awesome to be able to help people out by loaning them money, but when you don't communicate clearly about repayment (or what will happen if the money is not repaid) you set yourself up for a cycle of taking on other's debts and maybe even building more debt of your own.
Unless you're doing charity, set those boundaries early about when and how a loan will be repaid. And if you know you won't get the money back, rethink the loan altogether.
3. They create budgets that are realistic and reflect their current lifestyle.
In her book, What I Know for Sure, Oprah Winfrey wrote, “I hope the way you spend your money is in line with the truth of who you are and what you care about.” This is key for many successful women, especially when they're budgeting and investing.
Issa Rae told Money.com, "I don’t splurge just because. I will never have 17 cars. I will never have expensive jewelry. I don’t spend that much on my clothes, or shoes. I will spend money on a stylist, and a makeup artist, because those things feel necessary for work. But material things? No."
There's a clear indication that there are clear value systems sustained by what matters to them no matter how much they make, and budgeting is a huge part of that.
4. They consider the long-term effects of a rash purchase before proceeding.
It's totally okay to treat yourself, but if you find yourself impulsively buying things you don't really need or always living check to check because you've maxed out your credit card to take that sixth trip in one year, there's a problem that might put a damper on those financial freedom plans. (That is unless your trip is part of how you make your money, and it's a worthy investment into expanding your prospects.)
Successful women are conscious of the long- and short-term effects of purchases, small and large. They're always thinking about how one action can impact the bigger picture.
5. They are givers and believe in the reciprocity of that.
Many of us are familiar with the famous quote, "To whom much is given, must is required," and there's that undertone of service and charity that is a common thread for wealthy, successful women, especially those who run businesses or lead brands. Involving yourself in acts of service not only enriches your development and that of communities, but it increases your exposure, network, and credibility, often leading to more opportunities to make more money.
Most leading CEOs, entrepreneurs, and professionals are big on giving back, whether it is through resources, a nonprofit, money, or their time. "As you become more successful, it's important for you to give back. Even if you can't financially give back, kind words and sharing about other businesses on social media mean so much. Every little thing counts. Help out your friends and family with advice, encouragement, and support," said Angela Yee, award-winning radio host and entrepreneur.
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Originally published on August 16, 2024