

5 Celeb Moms Talk About Their Struggles With Postpartum Depression
Shortly after the birth of my second child, I felt completely lost.
I would chalk it up to having to care for a newborn baby and a toddler at the same time with little to no support. I blamed my struggling marriage, my limited support system, and even the weather: anything to explain the mood swings, the anxiety and the constant flood of tears. It wasn't until a few years later that I realized that had my own bout with postpartum depression (PPD).
About 1 in 7 women experience symptoms of postpartum depression.
These numbers might be underestimated due to the fact that there is still such a stigma surrounding mental illness, especially in the Black community. It is said that the symptoms of postpartum depression closely resemble those of classic depression and can include: crying more often than usual, feelings of anger, withdrawing from loved ones, feeling distant from your baby, worrying or feeling overly anxious, thinking about hurting yourself or your baby, and/or doubting your ability to care for your baby.
This is more than the typical "baby blues." PPD starts after the birth of the baby and can last for weeks, months or even years. Along with serious changes to your physical body, many people often gloss over the mental impact having a baby can have.
Recently, more and more high-profile women have been willing to come forward and express their own battles with the baby blues and PPD. And while no two women are the same, the more we shine a light on these issues, the more we can remove the stigma surrounding mental health and show other women that not only is PPD common, it is also treatable.
Cardi B gave birth to her first child, daughter Kulture Kiari, in July. The typically outspoken and social media happy rapper has flown under the radar since then, but she recently revealed via Instagram that she too is going through it. One of the symptoms of PPD include sadness and crying uncontrollably for long periods of time. She says:
"This postpartum s—t is annoying. Like I been emotional all f—king day for no reason."
Becoming a new mother is no easy task, no matter how it may look on social media. The lack of sleep, the recovery from the birth process, and the learning curve associated with caring for a newborn can breakdown even the baddest of bitches. The Invasion of Privacy rapstress initially thought she would be able to join Bruno Mars on a world tour after a short maternity leave, but the reality of taking care of a newborn superseded her need to get back on the road. Sometimes the best way to cope with any postpartum symptoms is to stop and recognize your own limitations. She revealed:
Cardi B's Instagram
"I underestimated this whole mommy thing. Not only am I just not ready physically, I'm not ready to leave my baby behind since the doctors explained it's not her to be on the road."
Serena Williams has been especially candid about her birthing process and the health issues she experienced after the birth of her daughter Olympia. And while she was able to physically bounce back and compete in this year's Wimbledon final, the new mom is still recovering from postpartum symptoms. Feeling like a bad mother is a common symptom as well, and as Serena reveals, being away from her child has taken its toll. Thankfully, she is using her platform to remind women that these feelings are totally normal and that having a good support system while finding balance is vital. She reveals:
"Last week was not easy for me. Not only was I accepting some tough personal stuff, but I just was in a funk. Mostly, I felt like I was not a good mom. I read several articles that said postpartum emotions can last up to 3 years if not dealt with. I like communication best. Talking things through with my mom, my sisters, my friends let me know that my feelings are totally normal...I'm not around as much as I would like to be. Most of you moms deal with the same thing. Whether stay-at-home or working, finding that balance with kids is a true art. You are the true heroes."
Another woman that has been brave enough to reveal her battle with PPD is Chrissy Teigen. The generally outspoken mother of two initially was afraid to speak about the issues she was quietly dealing with, but in an open letter to Glamour, Teigen details her experience, which included severe body pain that wouldn't go away, extreme sadness, anxiety, and a loss of appetite, which are all signals that PPD is rearing its ugly head. She told Glamour:
"I had everything I needed to be happy. And yet, for much of the last year, I felt unhappy. What basically everyone around me—but me—knew up until December was this: I have postpartum depression. How can I feel this way when everything is so great?"
The model and author knows that her voice can help other women move past the shame associated with PPD, and by doing so, she is helping more women than she might even imagine.
Chrissy's Instagram
"I'm speaking up now because I want people to know it can happen to anybody and I don't want people who have it to feel embarrassed or to feel alone."
We all know that as a woman moves through pregnancy, her body drastically changes. What some may not realize, the physical effects of pregnancy can persist for months, and not everyone can just bounce back into bikini shape. During pregnancy, everything stretches and expands to accommodate the growing baby, including the uterus. It often takes weeks if not months for the uterus shrinks back to its pre-pregnancy size. Combine that with the expected weight gain, some women never snapback, and that's okay.
Beyoncé recently revealed to Vogue her own experience after having an emergency C-section for the birth of her twins. She shines a light on how invasive the procedure is and how much taking time to recover from the process is more important than worrying about her six pack. She says she practiced a lot of self-care and patience and is no rush to trim down her FUPA. The singer says:
"After the C-section, my core felt different. It had been major surgery. Some of your organs are shifted temporarily, and in rare cases, removed temporarily during delivery. I am not sure everyone understands that. I needed time to heal, to recover. During my recovery, I gave myself self-love and self-care, and I embraced being curvier. I accepted what my body wanted to be...To this day my arms, shoulders, breasts, and thighs are fuller. I have a little mommy pouch, and I'm in no rush to get rid of it. I think it's real. Whenever I'm ready to get a six-pack, I will go into beast zone and work my ass off until I have it. But right now, my little FUPA and I feel like we are meant to be."
Body positivity after birth means being able to be patient with yourself and accepting the beautiful gift of our body's ability to produce life regardless of what it may do to our figures. Tia Mowry also knows that bouncing back right away after having a baby is not only unrealistic, it is setting a dangerous standard for women to live up to. The mother of two recently revealed her post-pregnancy body in a post on Instagram, and she reminds women to take their time and go at their own pace when it comes to returning to a pre-pregnancy body. She says:
"I wanted to shine a light on how our society creates false expectations after a woman gives birth. Ladies, it's okay that our bodies are not PERFECT after our babies are born. Give yourself time. Go at your own pace. Don't allow people to put a time limit on YOUR body,"
"I had seen in magazines the many women on the beach a few weeks postpartum in a two piece. To be honest, it had to take time for me to embrace my new body. With this second pregnancy, I now have embraced that fact that I've housed a human being. A miracle. A life. If it takes a while for me to get back to my normal self, than so be it."
Anyone who is blessed enough to have their own birth experience needs to recognize the fact that making babies is really HARD! We need to be more forgiving of ourselves, our emotions, and our bodies and be willing to work towards acceptance and asking for help when we need it. And for anyone who wants to support their friends and family through these times, it's so important to remember to be compassionate. Rather than dismiss their feelings, encourage them to speak with their doctors about their concerns.
Patience is a virtue, and after childbirth, it's the most important one to have.
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Michelle Schmitz is a writer and editor based in Washington, DC originally from Ft Lauderdale, FL. A self-described ambivert, you can find her figuring out ways to read more than her monthly limit of The New York Times, attending concerts, and being a badass, multi-tasking supermom. She also runs her own blog MichelleSasha.com. Keep up with her latest moves on IG: @michellesashawrites and Twitter: @michellesashas
Smile, Sis! These Five Improvements Can Upgrade Your Oral Hygiene Instantly
This article is in partnership with Sensodyne.
Our teeth are connected to so many things - our nutrition, our confidence, and our overall mood. We often take for granted how important healthy teeth are, until issues like tooth sensitivity or gum recession come to remind us. Like most things related to our bodies, prevention is the best medicine. Here are five things you can do immediately to improve your oral hygiene, prevent tooth sensitivity, and avoid dental issues down the road.
1) Go Easy On the Rough Brushing: Brushing your teeth is and always will be priority number one in the oral hygiene department. No surprises there! However, there is such a thing as applying too much pressure when brushing…and that can lead to problems over time. Use a toothbrush with soft bristles and brush in smooth, circular motions. It may seem counterintuitive, but a gentle approach to brushing is the most effective way to clean those pearly whites without wearing away enamel and exposing sensitive areas of the teeth.
2) Use A Desensitizing Toothpaste: As everyone knows, mouth pain can be highly uncomfortable; but tooth sensitivity is a whole different beast. Hot weather favorites like ice cream and popsicles have the ability to trigger tooth sensitivity, which might make you want to stay away from icy foods altogether. But as always, prevention is the best medicine here. Switching to a toothpaste like Sensodyne’s Sensitivity & Gum toothpaste specifically designed for sensitive teeth will help build a protective layer over sensitive areas of the tooth. Over time, those sharp sensations that occur with extremely cold foods will subside, and you’ll be back to treating yourself to your icy faves like this one!
3) Floss, Rinse, Brush. (And In That Order!): Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you do, but how you do it”? Well, the same thing applies to taking care of your teeth. Even if you are flossing and brushing religiously, you could be missing out on some of the benefits simply because you aren’t doing so in the right order. Flossing is best to do before brushing because it removes food particles and plaque from places your toothbrush can’t reach. After a proper flossing sesh, it is important to rinse out your mouth with water after. Finally, you can whip out your toothbrush and get to brushing. Though many of us commonly rinse with water after brushing to remove excess toothpaste, it may not be the best thing for our teeth. That’s because fluoride, the active ingredient in toothpaste that protects your enamel, works best when it gets to sit on the teeth and continue working its magic. Rinsing with water after brushing doesn’t let the toothpaste go to work like it really can. Changing up your order may take some getting used to, but over time, you’ll see the difference.
4) Stay Hydrated: Upping your water supply is a no-fail way to level up your health overall, and your teeth are no exception to this rule. Drinking water not only helps maintain a healthy pH balance in your mouth, but it also washes away residue and acids that can cause enamel erosion. It also helps you steer clear of dry mouth, which is a gateway to bad breath. And who needs that?
5) Show Your Gums Some Love: When it comes to improving your smile, you may be laser-focused on getting your teeth whiter, straighter, and overall healthier. Rightfully so, as these are all attributes of a megawatt smile; but you certainly don’t want to leave gum health out of the equation. If you neglect your gums, you’ll start to notice the effects of plaque buildup, which can irritate the gums and cause gingivitis, the earliest stage of gum disease. Seeing blood while brushing and flossing is a tell-tale sign that your gums are suffering. You may also experience gum recession — a condition where the gum tissue surrounding your teeth pulls back, exposing more of your tooth. Brushing at least twice a day with a gum-protecting toothpaste like Sensodyne Sensitivity and Gum, coupled with regular dentist visits, will keep your gums shining as bright as those pearly whites.
Black Girls Tennis Club Is Empowering Black Women and Girls To Reclaim Their Space On The Court
The face of tennis is changing, and it’s about time. Over the years, if you were asked to name any Black tennis player, two would come to mind: Serena and Venus Williams — and rightfully so. But as new tennis sensations like Coco Gauff and Naomi Osaka rise to fame for their athleticism and tenacity, it’s clear that there’s a new era of tennis taking shape to bring forth a fresh take on representation and reclamation on the courts.
For that reason alone, there’s no better time than now for Black Girl Tennis Club co-founders Virginia Thornton and Kimberly Selden to lead the charge of making tennis more accessible to Black women and girls so the next Serena and Coco can emerge.
What began as your everyday lunch chat between friends to discuss their mutual dream of owning a boutique hotel turned into a proposition to start a tennis club together. With Virginia being a tennis player since adolescence and Kimberly entering the sport as a hobby in her adult life, the two jumped at the idea of making a space where Black women could discover a new hobby and not feel like the “only one” on the tennis court.
“The club kind of started for selfish reasons, but not in a bad way,” Virginia tells xoNecole. “We realized that there was actually a need for this.”
Kimberly adds, “Now we're literally disrupting a whole industry. We didn't plan it, but it felt divine; like we were called to do this. Black Girls Tennis Club has been a catalyst for personal growth in all areas of life, and we would have never anticipated that.”
Since establishing the Black Girl Tennis Club in 2022, the two have made it their mission to cultivate a space for “Joy Equity and Radical Wellness.” Their platform serves as a means to inform, inspire, motivate, and reshape the narrative around Black women and girls in the tennis world while highlighting the transformative power of sports and play for liberation.
With approximately 78% of tennis players being white and only 6.8% being Black, and the average cost of a private tennis lesson being $60 per hour, racial and economic disparities within the sport are vast. To help close this gap, the two founders have banded together to develop free tennis instruction clinics for girls aged 8-18 and local tennis events that bring adult offerings through programs like the Self Love Tennis Club and Cardio Tennis Classes to HBCU campuses in Virginia.
Both Virginia and Kimberly understand the power of their mission and believe that they were brought on each other’s path to execute it together. “It’s the power of alignment,” Kimberly says. “I think when you're doing the right thing and you're obedient, and answer the call, that’s when things start to happen, and the universe conspires to make them happen.”
We caught up with the founders to discuss their mission, the importance of representation, and how they plan to disrupt the tennis industry one court at a time.
xoNecole: Could you talk a little more about your CARE pillars with change, access, representation and exposure?
Kimberly Selden: As we started to do the work, we saw that there were so many equity issues. Although we knew from our own personal experiences that there are barriers to tennis being an expensive sport, we just acknowledged it as the culture of tennis. Because it's predominantly white, that transfers over to the fashion, the dynamics on the court, the attitudes, and the mindset. And so we knew this required a culture shift for us to ever really feel comfortable.
We were exposing kids to tennis, and then after the clinics, they're like, "Okay, now what?" It's still expensive, and they still may or may not have had access to it if they're not with us. We don't want to just pop in like, "Hey, here's a clinic, bye!" So, the culture change is just a reflection of what our existence looks like. Access is about being able to access the sport through courts, programs, or a coach. Representation is that we can't believe it until we see it.
Granted, there are a lot of pro Black women tennis players taking off, and we love that. But we think about media representation as well [as] representation within the USCA, in the boardrooms, and the people that are making the rules around the game.
xoN: Why do you all think it’s important for Black women and girls to reclaim their space on the tennis court?
Virginia Thornton: It's rare, at least in my world, where you're in a space and see nothing but women who look like you. But it makes me feel great when I can be my authentic self, especially on a tennis court. Just shedding all the weight of pretending to be anything else. You feel at home when you're around nothing but Black women. Even small things like seeing a young Black girl being okay with how God made them is amazing.
KS: [In] the Atlanta clinics we did, everyone was crying. It's just clear how desperately we need it. Connection is the key to a long life. So many of us — especially from the pandemic and working from home — are isolated. With every clinic, it's just fun to be there, and it just fills you up. I think people need hobbies. I think a lot of people, especially people in big cities, feel that way and were confronted with that during the pandemic.
xoN: How did sports play a role in helping you two find your voice and confidence both on and off the court?
VT: I think what people don't realize is that tennis is such a mental sport. You could be a 4.0 player and have a bad mental day, and you will play like you've never picked up a racquet before. So, the mental piece is super important. For me, it's like ‘you against you,’ even though you are playing somebody.
If you're able to work through those mental pieces with yourself on the court, that will translate off the court. I had an issue on the court where I have a habit of saying, "Sorry," — I think a lot of Black women do, honestly. Then I realized that they wouldn't say sorry or they’d use my kindness as weakness. I've learned a lesson in that because everything translates on and off the court.
"If you're able to work through those mental pieces with yourself on the court, that will translate off the court."
KS: It's easy for me to do things that I'm good at, but it's not easy for me to do things that I'm not good at. Tennis is still challenging for me, but it pushes me. It’s a reality check for me; I know when things are aligned, and when they're not. It feels like a big metaphor for me because it's pushing me to do something that's uncomfortable and makes me work for myself more.
xoN: What do you hope the long-term impact of Black Girl Tennis Club will be?
VS: We want to have a space for people who might be workaholics or might be going through depression. It's always great to have a hobby, whether that's knitting, sewing, or what have you. For me and Kimberly, it’s about creating hobbies for Black women and girls but also knowing that it’s okay to not be amazing at it. You don't have to be amazing at tennis; you could hit around the court, and that's okay.
The next Serena or Venus might come from Black Girls Tennis Club.
To support Black Girl Tennis Club’s mission, donate to their cause here and follow their Instagram page to stay up to date with new clinics and events.
Featured image by LumiNola/Getty Images