Quantcast

Boris Kodjoe & Nicole Ari Parker Put Spiritual Practice First In Their Marriage

A solid marriage with effort—and spirituality—to back it up. We stan.

Celebrity News

When it comes to relationships and spirituality, I think back to a very specific conversation I had in the past with my boss—of all people. I was in Denver for the week, on a business trip, and we were out to lunch. We somehow got on the subject of relationships, which at that time, I absolutely was exiting a 'dodged bullet' type situation. And actually, as I sit here telling this story, I can't believe that I was talking about my love life with my boss—a blonde haired, blue-eyed 30-something-year-old woman, who I knew nothing about outside of our working relationship.

But she gave me some advice that stood out to me then, and still stands out to me today. She said, "If you want to be in a relationship, talk to God about it. But you have to mean it. And really mean it. Because He'll know if you don't."

And listen, there was nothing particularly groundbreaking about what she said, after all, we hear this kind of stuff all the time. But it was her conviction that I'll never forget. And because oftentimes spirituality and relationships often go hand-in-hand, perhaps I needed her conviction to understand the importance of what she was saying.

No one understands alllllll of the above better than our favorite longtime married couple, Nicole Ari Parker and Boris Kodjoe. Nicole and Boris are marriage goals in the culture. Their commitment to each other and their family is unmatched, and they are happy to share their journey with us all. They don't thrive on being perfect, but instead, putting in the work and maintaining what they've built for almost 15 years.

And despite the pandemic, they have labeled 2020 as the year that has brought them even closer. With being accustomed to conflicting, busy schedules, and being forced to quarantine together for months on end, if it were anymore possible, they have managed to use the stillness to perfect their marriage (even more).

So much so, that in a recent interview with The Grio, when asked what the biggest lessons that they've learned since the start of the pandemic, Kodjoe responded with a resounding:

"I got to know myself a lot in this pandemic, for sure. Learning from your mistakes and staying close to the ones you love. It's the only thing that matters really. And being grateful, you know? Being grateful for what you have, being grateful for your health, being grateful for your family. Taking, care of yourself too, on all levels, physically and mentally. [And] having some kind of spiritual practice and habits that help you deal with constant onslaught."

The couple aren't strangers to addressing the spirituality of their marriage, as Parker famously shared the prayer she recited to snag her husband. This prayer consisted of a list of everything she was looking for in a spouse, from his looks to his (quick)books. The actress then recalled how God led her to include spiritual, mental, physical and financial attributes on her list. However, things turned around when she had to reflect upon herself if she would be the perfect wife for the man on that list if he entered her life at that moment.

The rest went down in relationship spirituality history.

She continued for Kodjoe:

"We don't have to fight about the things that we used to fight about anymore. We solve arguments. I mean, our relationship—everyone's always joking about how it's driving them crazy. But we actually, like I said, have been able to appreciate each other more. I just think also with everything that's coming at us through the news, that it can be so overwhelming. I've really learned how to have faith, be resilient, and think of solutions."

A solid marriage with effort—and spirituality—to back it up. We stan.

Are you a member of our insiders squad? Join us in the xoTribe Members Community today!

Featured image via s_bukley / Shutterstock.com

You know what? Sometimes, you've got to push a few coins aside and determine in your mind that you're going to invest into your sex life (if you had a sex jar, this would be easier to do, by the way. You can read more about what that is all about here). If you're someone who is totally down to do that, but you don't have a clue where to begin, boy have you come to the right place! Between the joy of being a writer who sometimes gets samples sent to me, the constant research that I do for the couples I work with and having folks shout-out certain items semi-often, I've compiled a list of 12 sex-related items that may seem random AF (a pun is kind of intended there) and, at the same time, can make sex so much better between you and your partner. Where's your pad at? You're definitely gonna wanna take note.

Keep reading... Show less
The daily empowerment fix you need.
Make things inbox official.

Recently, I was talking to a friend of mine about someone who once told me that they had an annual week-long summer rendezvous that lasted for over 15 years with someone else. Yep — this individual would meet up with another person who lived in a different state, solely to have sex for a week straight, and then return to their city as if nothing ever happened. According to them, the only reason why this ritual romp eventually came to an end is because the other person decided to get serious about someone else; however, it wasn't until it ended that the person who told me the story realized how attached they actually had become to their sex partner (a cautionary tale). After I completed my lil' tale, my friend simply said, "Oh, I do that s — t every cuffing season. There are some people who I only talk to around this time of year, we f — k around and then that's that until the season comes around again."

Keep reading... Show less

How We Met is a series where xoNecole talks about love and relationships with real-life couples. We learn how they met, how like turned into love, and how they make their love work.

When it comes to sexuality, there have always been societal limitations centered on what is "acceptable." However, with more honest conversations about how fluid sexuality and sexual expression can be, now there are so many more opportunities for self-exploration and taking back ownership of our identities again. One couple that is living their truth and being sexual beings unapologetically while living and loving their lives are Jasmine Johnson and King Noire.

Keep reading... Show less

I'm so excited because one of my favorite unscripted shows is back. OWN's Ready to Love is a dating series that follows professionals over 30, looking for long-lasting relationships. Hosted by Nephew Tommy, it follows singles who desire true connections and are grouped together to find them.

Keep reading... Show less

Social media influencer and actress Tabitha Brown has garnered viral fame through her inspirational and vegan videos on Instagram, thanks to her cheerful personality and infectious smile. Now, she is entering a new phase in her life as an author. The 42-year-old released Feeding the Soul on Sept. 28 and recently shared an emotional video of herself after finding out her book was number one on the New York Times Best Sellers list.

Keep reading... Show less
Exclusive Interviews

Jill Scott Talks Balance, 'Highway To Heaven' & Not Burning Herself Out To Produce

In this exclusive, the actress dishes on executive producing the reboot, and balancing business and motherhood.

Latest Posts