In About Face, xoNecole gets the 411 on IGers who give us #skincaregoals on a daily. Here they break down their beauty routines on the inside and out, as well as the highly coveted products that grace their shelves and their skin.
Achieng Agutu has made a name for herself as a "Certified Confidence Queen," and when you look at the material, there's no wonder why. Through her encouraging words, energy, and bad bish mantras shared on social media underneath the name @noordinarynoire, Achieng has amassed a following of over 450K followers who gravitate toward the content creator for keys to the confidence kingdom. The 25-year-old revealed to xoNecole that the true key to confidence lies in authenticity. "Be yourself, live your life for you and no one else," she says. "It is important to accept yourself for your unique qualities and find the power in it."
Without a doubt, Achieng has tapped into the fullness of that power as unapologetic self-love and confidence radiate from her entire being. She is confident in the skin she is in and has defined beauty for herself. She remembers finding beauty in things rather than people and that perspective lent itself to her most significant beauty lesson which is that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. "What's beautiful to you might not be beautiful to me or my standards of beauty may not match yours," she explains. "Beauty is subjective."
Photo Credit: Braylen Dion
Growing up in Kenya is something else that impacted the way Achieng saw beauty, especially in how she approached her skincare. Whereas she noted skincare routines in the United States seemed to revolve around products, her upbringing in Kenya taught her that skincare and beauty were just as much internal as it is external. "To me, taking care of your health is also taking care of your skin. This is still how I view skincare," she shares. "In a similar way, this also reflects my view of beauty. Western media sold us the idea that external factors – white, skinny, tall, and blonde – were the standard of beauty. I have since learned that beauty is internal. The way a person carries themselves with confidence and kindness is what makes them beautiful."
To take care of herself internally, Achieng actively journals and enjoys drinking water as means of self-care and self-pleasure. The latter of which she also likes to maximize the benefits of through water affirmations. "It’s such a powerful thing for me. Something I like to do when I drink any liquid, but mainly water, is speak manifestations and desires into it. Speak into it who you are or who you want to be, drink it with zeal, and watch everything come to fruition. I call it 'water affirmations' and they work for me."
Keep scrolling for more insight into Achieng Agutu’s morning and night skincare routines.
Achieng Agutu's Morning Skincare Routine
Step One: Cleanse
La Mer Cleansing Foam
La Mer
"I cleanse my face using the La Mer Cleansing Foam. I love this cleanser because it is effective, yet gentle for my sensitive skin. This one, in particular, is also fragrance-free."
Step Two: Mask
Dr. Dennis Gross DRx SpectraLite™ FaceWare Pro
Dr. Dennis Gross
"I use the Dr. Dennis Gross LED mask. It is an anti-acne, anti-aging treatment I use every other day."
Step Three: Face Toning
Face Gym Pure Lift Face
Face Gym
"I use the Face Gym Pure Lift Face [tool] to depuff and contour my face! It's like Gua Sha 2.0!"
Step Four: Exfoliate
Paula's Choice 2% BHA Liquid Exfoliant
Paula's Choice
"I exfoliate Paula’s Choice 2% BHA Liquid Exfoliant. It is gentle enough to use every day."
Step Five: Eye Cream
Ole Henriksen Banana Bright Eye Cream
Ole Henriksen
"I take time to put on my eye treatment: Ole Henriksen Banana Bright Eye Cream. It smells so good and it gives me instant brightness under the eye."
Step Seven: Serum
Biossance Squalane + Copper Peptide Rapid Plumping Serum
Biossance
"Depending on my skin needs, I will use the Biossance Squalane + Copper Peptide Serum for its super-moisturizing qualities. It makes the skin look nice and bouncy. Or I'll go in with a Vitamin C Serum from Ole Henriksen for more brightness. I usually alternate between these two serums."
Step Eight: Moisturize
Fenty Skin Hydra Vizor Invisible Moisturizer Broad Spectrum SPF 30 Sunscreen
Fenty Skin
"I finish up my routine with my favorite moisturizer from Fenty Skin, the Hydra Vizor which already has SPF in it! I love it because it smells good, Rihanna made it, and the Kalahari melon helps with keeping my skin moisturized."
"At the very end, I take a step back to admire the glow in the skin and the depuffed face ready for the day. Honestly, this is my favorite part of my routine!"
Achieng Agutu's Evening Skincare Routine
Step One: Cleanse
La Mer Cleansing Foam
La Mer
"Before I start my nightly skincare routine, I pick out my music to set the vibes. I cleanse the day away using the cleansing foam by La Mer again."
Step Two: Eye Cream
Ole Henriksen Banana Bright Eye Cream
Ole Henriksen
"I go in again with my Ole Henriksen Banana Bright Eye Cream."
Step Three: Facial Oil
Sunday Riley Luna Sleeping Night Oil
Sunday Riley
"For the evening time, I apply the Sunday Riley Luna Sleeping Night Oil."
Step Four: Moisturize
Fenty Skin Hydra Vizor Invisible Moisturizer Broad Spectrum SPF 30 Sunscreen
Fenty Skin
"Once again, I finish up my routine with my Fenty Skin Hydra Vizor moisturizer."
For more of Achieng, follow her on Instagram @noordinarynoire.
Featured image by Braylen Dion
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Anyway, I personally think that the less shallow folks out here may contemplate calling things “quits” or they at least distance themselves a bit from their partner (and what I’m referring to is serious relationships) due to all of the stress and strain that oftentimes comes with the holidays whether it be financial, familial, due to their tight schedules or something else.
Listen, I would hate for you and your man to miss the fun and happiness of experiencing this time of year, all because you are so overwhelmed or irritated that you can’t really enjoy it. That’s why I have a few practical tips for how to avoid allowing the typical holiday season stress from INFECTING your relationship.
Manage Your Expectations
GiphyUnmanaged expectations. If there is a main reason why the holiday season tends to be so stress-filled for so many people, I’d bet good money that this is the cause. And when you’re in a long-term relationship, expectations can manifest themselves in all sorts of cryptic and/or unexpected ways. You might have relatives who assume that you are going to be with them for Thanksgiving or Christmas when you have other plans in mind. You might be thinking that you are going to spend one amount for presents while your man is thinking something totally different. When it comes to scheduling, your signals may be crossed.
And you know what? To all of these scenarios, this is where clear and consistent communication come in. Don’t assume anything. Don’t dictate anything either. From now until New Year’s, mutually decide to check in once a week, just to make sure that you are both on the same page as it relates to the holidays and what you both are thinking will come along with it. The less blindsided you both feel, the less stressed out you will be. Trust me on this.
Set (and Keep) a Budget
GiphyOkay, so I read that last year, 36 percent of Americans incurred some type of holiday-related debt. Hmph. Last year, there was still some sense of normalcy in this country, chile, so I can only imagine what finances are gonna look like over the next several weeks. That said, since I don’t know a lot of people who don’t find being broke stressful, make sure that you and your bae set a budget and then stick to it this year — no ifs, ands or buts.
Because really, y’all — it doesn’t make sense to deplete savings and/or max out credit cards for a few days of giggles only to be damn near losing your mind because you don’t know how to make ends meet come Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
And by the way, this tip doesn’t just speak to things like food and gifts; I also mean travel. If it doesn’t make a ton of sense (or cents) to be all over the place this year — DON’T BE.
Keep Matthew 5:37 at the Forefront
GiphyIf off the top of your head, you don’t know what Matthew 5:37 says, no worries, here ya go: “But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one.” That verse right there? Oh, it’s a boundaries lifesaver! I say that because do you see “maybe” or “I’ll think about it” in there? Nope. LOL. It says that you should tell people “yes” or “no” and leave it at that — and that complements Anne Lamott’s quote, “’No’ is a complete sentence” impeccably well. Yeah, you’ve got to remember that anything beyond a yes or no to a request is privileged information; you don’t owe anyone details or an explanation.
Besides, if you are really honest with yourself, when someone asks you something and you give a “Umm, let me think about it” kind of reply, more times than not, you already know what your answer is going to be — so why not let you both off of the hook? Give your response. Commit to that. And let everyone (including yourself) get on with their lives and schedules.
I promise you that when it comes to those holiday parties, you are pissing more folks off by not RSVP’ing or doing so and not showing up than just saying, “Thank you but not this year” off the rip.
Remember That Your Personal Space Is Privilege Not a Right
GiphyA friend of mine recently bought a new house and invited me over to come see it. He’s a single man with no children, so as I was taking in all of the space that he had, especially as I walked through his finished basement, I joked about relatives coming to live with him. “Hell no” and “absolutely not” were pretty much his immediate responses as he went on to say that some folks even had the nerve to be offended when he told them that he had no intentions on taking DNA in.
Ain’t it wild how people think that your stuff is their right? And yes, that brings me to my next point. Your home is your sanctuary space. If you want to host folks this year — cool. If not, ALSO COOL. Please don’t let folks (family included) guilt you into how they want you to act or even into what they would do if the shoe was on the other foot. You are not them — and as one of my favorite quotes states, “If two people were exactly alike, one of them would be unnecessary.” (A man by the name Larry Dixon said that.)
Hell, my friends? They know that I am good for sending them random things that they need or even want all throughout the year. Coming over to hang out at my pace, though. Uh-uh. Chalk it up to being a card-carrying member of the ambivert club yet I like keeping my living space personal — and I sleep like a baby, each and every night, for feeling that way.
Always remember that your space, your time, your resources, your energy and shoot, yourself period (including your relationship), are all things that are your own. You get to choose how, when and why you want to share them. The holiday season is certainly no exception.
Cultivate Some “You Two Only” Traditions
GiphyIt’s not uncommon for some couples to hit me up after the holiday season to “detox.” Sometimes it’s due to the financial drama (and sometimes trauma) that they experienced. Sometimes it’s because they allowed their relatives (especially in-laws) to get more into their personal business than they should’ve. More than anything, though, it tends to be because they didn’t get enough quality time together and so ended up feeling “disconnected.”
Please don’t let that happen. Listen, I’m not even a holidays kind of woman and yet, I will absolutely sit myself down with some hot chocolate and chocolate chip cookies to enjoy a Hallmark holiday film or two. Aside from the fact that most of them are lighthearted and sweet, I also like that they usually focus on couples loving on each other amidst all of the holiday beauty and ambiance — which is something that all couples should set aside some time to do.
Maybe it’s a vacation. Maybe it’s a staycation. Or maybe it’s my personal favorite, A SEXCATION. Whether it’s for a few days, the weekend or even overnight — don’t you let the holidays go by without setting aside time for you and your man to celebrate one another. Don’t you dare (check out “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?”).
GET. SOME. REST.
GiphyI once read that 8 out of 10 people get stressed out over the holidays and 3 out of 10 lose sleep during to it — and when you’re stress-filled and sleep-deprived, that can absolutely lead to hypersensitivity, making mountains out of molehills and even not being in the mood for sex.
Your relationship can’t afford to go through any of this, so definitely make sure to prioritize rest. I don’t care how unrealistic it might seem during this time, sleep should never be seen as a luxury; it will always and forever be a great necessity.
That said, try to get no less than six hours of shut-eye in (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”) and even ask your bae to take a nap with you sometimes (check out “Wanna Have Some Next-Level Sex? Take A Nap, Sis.”). Not only will sleep help to restore your mind, body and spirit but, when it’s with your partner, it’s an act of intimacy that can make you both feel super connected, even in the midst of what might feel like chaos.
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Holiday season stress is real. Still, never give it the permission or power to throw your relationship off. Put you and your man first and let the holidays be what they are gonna be, chile.
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